When I'm Gone
By: Dark Draconain
Rated: PG - 13
Feedbak: If you would be so kind ^_^
Disclaimer: See Prologue
Summery: Truth is in the eye of the storm. (A/T)

When I'm Gone
Chapter Five: Without Emotion

Archer wondered around in a daze. He couldn't tell where he was, didn't know where he'd been, and didn't know how to get somewhere else. He was lost. Hopelessly, utterly lost. And he was exhausted and freezing to boot. And with each step he took, he was reminded painfully of why he was out there.

Was T'Pol all right? Had she found shelter? Was she safe? Would she even care if she knew where he was? Did she even care about him? He liked to think she did. Sometimes it almost seemed like she did. Or was that just his imagination? He wondered what it would be like not to feel anything. Not to feel any emotions. But sometimes it seemed like she did. Sometimes he was sure she did. And sometimes…sometimes he wished he could see inside her mind.

And other times he wished he could just sit down and have a normal conversation with her. But that seemed so impossible. So far off. And at this present time it didn't really matter. The chances of both of them making it off this forbidden ice-rock were slim to none. And the chances of him ever seeing her again were slowly sliding away.

But he should be used to being alone by now. Used to always being the one who lost. After all, all the people he'd ever really loved had died. So why should she be any different?

As he continued trudging miserably though the snow he came across a rock outcropping that could at the very least shield him from the wind. He only hopped that he would be the one who died, and not T'Pol.

~~~*~~~

They proceeded on for nearly an hour before they happened across him. It was Tse-la who first spotted the huddled figure lying under a rocky outcropping. T'Pol approached the heap slowly, fearing the worst. Just as she got there she wondered which would be worse, finding Jonathan Archer dead, or not finding him at all. Taking a deep breath, she bent down and slowly turned the body to face her.

It was Archer. What was visible of his face was covered in ice and frozen blood, but she was sure is was him. She slowly removed her glove, and pulled down the collar of his jacket. She proceeded to search for his pulse just as her superiors had taught her: without emotion. Or at least she tried. It was hard, and it pained her acknowledge why. Her feelings went against all her principals, against everything she had come to accept as right, and against her wishes. And she didn't understand why something that felt so unnatural could be so prevalent in her mind.

She nearly sighed with relief when she felt a pulse under her cold fingers. It was a slight pulse, but at least he was alive. T'Pol turned to Tse-la and Sen-te, "We need to get him back to the capital."