Disclaimer: All characters excepting cosy and Snipe's mum belong to j.k.rowling. The song belongs to Avril Lavigne.
Author's Notes: Wasssssssssssssup everybody! To anyone on half term next week, HAPPY HOLS! By the way, it's LESS THAN 8 WEEKS TIL CHRISTMAS! WHOOOOOO!
Has anyone seen the advert for a Gywneth Paltrow film called 'Possession'? I went to the cinema to see 'Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood' last night, and I saw the advert 4 it. It looks well good and coz it was filmed here, the premiere is in my hometown! Groovy eh? And also, there is a guy in it who looks so much like a younger version of Alan Rickman it's amazing! Anyway, on with the story!
After Professor Snape left the room, Hermione turned round and breathed a sigh of exhaustion and barely concealed excitement. She quickly ran to the end of the room and opened the door. She had been right – it was an en suite bathroom decorated in clean blue and white tiles. There was a huge bathtub at one end, almost big enough to be a Jacuzzi, and on closer inspection she discovered it had almost as many bubble bath selections as the prefects' bathroom at Hogwarts. In the same sparkling white, there was also a toilet and basin, as well as many soft, fluffy blue towels in the exact shade of the tiles. Above the basin there was a large framed mirror, which Hermione glanced quickly into. She was horrified with what she saw; her skin was deathly pale, but she had dark shadows cast under her lifeless eyes. Even though she had only washed it the day before, her hair hung lank over her shoulders. Shuddering at her unfamiliar appearance, Hermione moved from the bathroom, making a firm decision to have a bath in a while.
Stepping back into her room, Hermione admired its beauty yet again. Then, moving to her suitcase, she heaved it onto the bed and flicked open the switches. She then stared for a moment at the mess that met her eyes. Clothes had just been dropped in, not even folded, and all her other possessions had been dropped on top. *Of course,* she thought. *Snape* Only a man could do this much damage, she decided as she pulled out a wrinkled and creased yellow t-shirt. Sighing softly, she got everything out of the suitcase until it was empty, and shoved it under the bed. Dumping her clothes on the bed, she muttered a smoothing charm on each item as she held it up and carefully put it away in either the wardrobe or the chest of drawers. She decided that she would not speak to Professor Snape about it, as, after all, he was a male of the species and he had been trying to help. She then turned back to the bed and reached out to retrieve her cd player. It was lucky that Hermione had charmed her cd played to work on magic, because there seemed not to be any electricity in the house apart from the lighting; which she suspected Snape had fixed with magic. She couldn't quite imagine her reputable Potions Professor twiddling around with red and black wires in a fuse box.
Grabbing the rest of her cds, Hermione put on her favourite new cd by Avril Lavigne. She turned the volume right up and flopped back onto her bed as 'I don't give a damn' thumped out in the room. Listening to the lyrics made her feel angry and frustrated, but also more alone than ever before.
'Every time you go away
It actually kinda makes my day,
Every time you leave you slam the door.
You pick your words so carefully,
Hate to think you're hurting me,
You leave me laughing on the floor, coz,
I don't give a damn,
I don't give a damn,
What you say about that?
You know I don't give a damn,
I don't give a damn,
What you say about that?'
These feelings intensified as she crunched up her eyes in am attempt to hold back the flood of tears that pricked at the back of her irises. Opening her eyes to let the wetness from her very soul pour from her, she rolled onto her side to stare out of the window. The sun, which had been so bright earlier, had disappeared behind thick, heavy, black, menacing clouds. Suddenly there was a crack like a whip and the sky was lit up in a flash of blinding yellow light. Large, heavy raindrops began to fall from the sky like pellets from an invisible army in the heavens.
A thunderstorm in the middle of summer. As the tears began to dry up, Hermione knew her parents would not want her to mourn them forever – they would want her to get on with and enjoy her life. Exhaling softly, Hermione stood, and walked across the room, deciding now was the perfect time for that bath she had promised herself.
********************
Severus walked quickly down the staircase, looking harsh in his black robes against the soft setting of his entrance hall. Glancing up at an impressive Grandfather clock, he realised how quickly the day had passed. It was now 5 o'clock, and neither of them had eaten since breakfast many hours ago. In fact, all he had had was his usual cup of black coffee, and he was sure that all Hermione had eaten was a piece of toast with marmite on and a glass of pumpkin juice. He made a mental note to go and ask her if she wanted something to eat after she had had some time alone in her room. He also made a note to make sure that she ate well and healthily during her stay here. For one thing, he did not want to be accused of starving her when they went back to Hogwarts, but he also felt a strange concern for her.
He was about to turn right at the bottom of the stairs, when he spotted a yellowed parchment letter on the hall table. The author had used a scratchy quill in a black scrawl that he recognised all too well. He guessed immediately that it was the letter from his mother that Cosy had spoken of, and so he picked it up and ripped it open quickly. Sure enough, it read:
To My Dear Severus,
I apologise dearest, but my visit to you this summer will have to be postponed for a day as something has come up at home which will detain me for a day longer than planned. I hope you and Cosy are well my son; I will see you tomorrow afternoon promptly, all being well.
All my love,
Mother xxxSeverus crumpled up the envelope and threw it into a waste paper bin, and shoved the letter roughly into one of the deep pockets of his thick outer robe. With that, he stormed off in the direction he had formerly been headed in. Stopping in front of one of the many wooden panelled doors, he pushed his robes aside and dug his hand into the pocket of his black trousers. He frowned until he found what he was looking for. He drew out a small, golden key, which he quickly fitted into the lock in the door and twisted fiercely, eliciting a sharp click. The door swung open to reveal a long, steep downward sloping staircase. It led deep under the mansion to the dungeons, where Snape hid his Potions lab. The cold hit him as he slammed the door shut behind him. He pulled out his wand from the pocket closest to his chest and held it in his wand hand, in his case, his right. Severus held his wand in front of him and muttered,
"Lumos." Either side of him, the walls were almost scraping his shoulders as the passageway was so thin, and the uneven stone steps and walls became increasingly slippy, wet and grungy. He walked down and down the winding corridors and staircases, the air getting colder by the second. An icy breeze whipped at him, biting at the bare skin of his face, neck and hands. But he didn't mind the cold; in fact he quite liked it. It blocked out the pain in the very depths of his heart, and it was harder for his mind to wander to his disgusting past in the freezing cold. You had to keep your mind focused on one objective. The dungeons suited him, and he belonged there. He always had, and doubtlessly he always would.
Despite the lengthy walk, Severus reached his laboratory within minutes. As he entered the room, he muttered "Incendio," at the fireplace, and then the many oil lamps and candles, which surrounded the room. He did not do this for the warmth, simply the light: as the muggle lighting system did not reach this far underground. However, that would all change if his latest experiment went to plan. But today, even the cold seemed to be effecting him more than usual. He stood in the middle of the room, his eyes piercing round the room. This was his first proper visit back here in a year although he had been here for some weekends throughout the school year, and the dreadful mess he had left his lab in had remained. During his last visit about four months ago, he had had to make a deadly potion for Voldemort. It was called 'Memorias Libertius' and it required extreme skill and precision in Potions making. It would cause unbelievable pain and eventually kill the drinker after just one drop. After he had taken it to Voldemort, he had been ridden with shame, guilt, but over most, self-hate and disgust, so he had taken it out on his lab, the place that he probably was happiest, and smashed it to pieces. At the time, Cosy had heard the noise even up in the house, and had immediately offered to clean up for him. He wouldn't hear of it not only because no one was allowed in his lab, because he was so ashamed of the things he did there, but also because it was he mess that he had created, so someone else should not clear it up.
Looking around him now, he only just realised the extent of the damage he had done. Some of his most prized Potions possessions had been damaged beyond recognition, and déjà vu hit him as he bent to pick up the shards of a broken glass jar. Although Severus had never been in favour of waving a wand to solve your problems, he was too tired and confused to sort this one out himself, so he murmured a tidying spell. He sank appreciatively into his desk chair and watched thankfully as his magic performed its job.
Turning to his desk, Severus surveyed the wreckage of his Potions Laboratory. The dark coloured wooden coat stand next to the door had been knocked to the floor, and his spare robes and cloaks were in a crumpled heap on the floor. At the opposite end of the room to his desk, there was a long lab bench, which stretched right across the room. The right end had two fire hearths underneath the caldron-sized holes in the work desk. The caldrons themselves had rolled onto the floor, and the larger of the two had a long crack down one side. The rest of the desk had smashed shards of broken glass vials, test tubes, bottles and jars. Ingredients had fallen from the cramped shelves above the bench, and brightly coloured liquids had dried on the wood, leaving stains. Beneath the bench, there were other caldrons in smaller sizes than his main two, and most of them contained Potions equipment, parchment, and a few odds and ends that he hadn't known where to put. To his right, facing the door, there was a large fireplace, which currently contained a roaring fire. The flames licked at the chunks of wood rapidly turning to ash. Closer to his desk which was at the far end of the room, on both sides, there were large, towering wooden bookcases heaving with the weight of hundreds of Potions books, texts and articles. During his rampage that had caused this mess, even in his foul temper and self-loathing, he had not been able to touch the books. He remembered how his fingers had been itching to grab them and rip them to tatters, but he knew if he regretted nothing else, he would regret that. Even in his childhood and teen years, he had prized his books over any other possession, and Severus knew that would never change.
Severus dropped his head down to then to look appraisingly at his huge oak desk before him. Parchment, quills and magazine articles from those such as 'Potions World', or 'Potions Masters of today'. He had knocked over inkwells, and he could clearly see red, blue and black ink stains that had seeped deep into the wood. He sighed and rubbed his eyes with his long, fine-boned fingers, enable to look at the mess he had created any longer. He had had his whole body leant over the desk, but now he felt exhausted, and so collapsed back into the leather and wood chair. He brought his elbow up to rest on the armrest of the chair, and put his head in his hand.
He sat there like that for a moment, before he realised that he was thinking about Hermione. He other hand clenched into a fist as he thought of what he had done. How could he have been so stupid? He should have waited, and lured the deatheater away, but he had reacted in the only way he thought possible when he saw Hermione in danger. He had killed her mother, but 'saved' her. And yet, she did not hate him. Severus decided that she must still be in shock. But, was she? It was true; he had to admit to himself, that his feelings had changed towards her since that night. He no longer thought of her as the Gryffindor know-it-all from his Potions class any longer, in fact, he no longer thought of her as a Gryffindor at all, despite the fact that she had clearly shown such Gryffindor bravery and skill in a situation of peril. No, he now could not help but think of her as he saw her, as a beautiful, intelligent young woman, who had taken over his mind and captured his heart.
*No!* he thought as he jerked his head up. *She has not taken my heart! Nor my mind! I do not have any feelings for this woman!* But even as he thought it, Severus knew he was kidding himself. That night, in Dumbledore's office, it had felt so right to have her in his arms, and when she had buried her head in his chest and shoulder, all he had wanted to do was to hold her and comfort her, and not let anyone ever hurt her or upset her again.
Snape realised that this is what Dumbledore had been looking so happy about! The old man had tried his best to conceal his excitement with serious expressions and words, but his eyes had betrayed him. He had known what was happening and if it was what Snape thought it was, Hermione was also experiencing these feelings. Severus knew that these feelings were not real, more an illusion, as they always were in 'emotional bonds'.
Suddenly, he pushed back from the table and stood, the chair just catching itself before falling to the floor with a clatter. When his thoughts had been on the young woman upstairs, his forbidding expression had quickly softened, and dissolved into a neutral expression. Now, he quickly replaced it with his customary scowl. Hermione could not find out about this, it would be all the better if the unwanted feelings in both of them just disappeared in time, he convinced himself. He would treat her with respect and he would be nice to her, after all she had just lost her parents.
*Because of you,* he thought, enable to resist one last dig at himself. Leaving his magic to weave its work on his lab, he left, slamming the door, causing a echo down the deserted corridor. Severus stormed back up towards the house, where he would have to face Hermione.
********************
Hermione leant her head back against the end of the bathtub. She was in a sweet-smelling, luxurious heaven. She had filled the huge bath with almost scalding hot water and chosen a lavender bubble bath selection. It soothed her tired and aching muscles and helped to clear her head, and the aromatherapy smell banished the pains in her face, which had felt as if they had made themselves permanent. Lying back in bliss, with her eyes closed, Hermione's mind began to wander. After a moment, she realised with shock that her mind had unintentionally settled on Professor Snape. She wondered where he was now, and what he was doing. It seemed that he had changed so much, so subtly over just a few days ago. If someone had told Hermione a week beforehand that she was to spend the summer with her dreaded Potions Master, she probably would have screamed and tried to top herself. But now, Hermione knew she had no one, and realised that she felt comfortable and happy here already. Ever since that night when he had saved her, she had felt so warm and so cherished in his presence that, wrapped in his arms, she had never wanted to leave.
*But he killed your mother,* her mind seemed to taunt at her. Hermione chewed on her bottom lip, and wondered why she did not blame him for this. It could of course be because of that 'emotional bond' she reasoned, but Hermione felt sure that this was more than that. She felt so confused, her life seemed to be a mess and also be perfect all at the same time. She decided she had had long enough in the water.
Hermione hauled her body out of the soapy water and wrapped a cosy, warm towel around her body. She automatically cast a drying charm over her body, excepting her hair as it made it go fuzzy. She walked back through to the bedroom, and stopped in front of a full-length mirror in the corner of the room. She took a deep breath and dropped the towel. Hermione gazed at her reflection. She had a nice, womanly figure; a thin waist, and quite large hips, which sloped gently into perfectly shaped thighs and calves. Her breasts were quite large also, and creamy peach coloured. She had a pretty face; soft features with light pink lips, hazel eyes and a light scattering of freckles over her nose and cheekbones. Her still-wet hair hung in twists about her shoulders, framing her face in light curls and waves.
She was still regarding herself carefully, wondering whether she should be satisfied with it or not, when there was a sharp rap on the door.
A/N: I hope you guys like this chapter, and I hope you think there is enough description. Snape's mother will arrive in the next chapter, and I will try to make it quite funny. Not really sure when it will be up, but I'm not going to London after all, so maybe by Sunday. Please keep reviewing, and thank you so much everybody, I have nearly 100 reviews!
Many thanks to all reviewers, please review this chapter!
Serpentina, glad u like the description and cosy! Thanks for your email btw.
Wolf, lol! I haven't seen that film! Please try to remember what it's called!
Kaira, I have rectified that, if u see any more please don't hesitate to let me know.
Thanks also to, Jamie, Marisa Raven, LadyofSeverus, Misscrystialix, Barbi bee, Professorgaladriel, H2)-polo-player, Jenthewriter (I will when I get the time!) and Marieblack (I know, I say it all the time!) and to anyone else I've missed. THANK YOU ALL!!!!!!!