Consciousness came to the fore of Buffy's mind slowly. Very slowly. Slow
enough for her to enjoy sliding her hands across Spike's back. Slow enough
to enjoy that tiny little grunt he made as he nuzzled at her neck,
tightening his arms around her. Slow enough to enjoy the six pairs of eyes
staring at her. WHAT? Six pairs of- winced. Shit. Everything came back,
rather quickly. She thought she might even sue for whiplash. Her body
went completely stiff.
The sudden tenseness of her muscles was enough to wake Spike a little. "Luv..", he muttered, still mostly asleep. "Relax a little, could you? It's like cuddling a board." All this was said too low for the observers to hear.
Bit her lip. Repeatedly, harshly. "Spike... It's... it's time to get up." Her voice was quiet, but an uncomfortable pitch.
He responded only by trying to hide his nose in her hair.
"Spike." A little more insistent. A little more nervous. A little more high-pitched.
That got his attention. "What's wrong, luv.." Trailed off as he regained enough consciousness to feel the eyes staring at them. Oh yeah. His brilliant plan... which was now seeming a lot less than brilliant. Tried for a good-natured sounding voice. "Oh. Mornin', all."
It was a reflex for Buffy to move back slightly. "Morning, guys..."
Spike tightened his arm around her. An unspoken reminder of what they'd planned. Looked at the group. Decided to be blunt today. "What? Never seen a bloke cuddle with his girlfriend?"
Xander balked, and looked as if he was going to be sick. "In your dreams. Get off her, Spike." Totally ignored the fact that it was *her* that was mostly on *him*.
Giles cleaned his glasses.
Buffy exhaled a quiet, "Oh, God..." Sat up slowly. "Ok... We need to talk..."
Spike sat up next to her, keeping a hand on her leg. Holding what was his.
Xander looked at her. "Buffy, please tell me that Evil Dead has finally gone around the bend."
Shook her head slowly at him. "No, Xand." She bit her lip again. "We're, uh... Spike and I... it's... we're... together." Not the most graceful thing she had blurted out, she knew.
Xander took a step back, then turned a look of pure hatred on the vampire. "Let her go, Dead-boy Junior. You've got her in some sort of vampy mind trick, don't you?"
Spike just snorted, and glanced around at the others, gauging their reactions.
Giles was vigorously cleaning his glasses. Rubbing so hard, that one of the lenses came out in his hand. "Bloody hell."
Buffy glanced at Dawn, who was giving her full-support looks. Well, duh. Willow was doing that, "I love you, but I'm so very nervous, are you sure this is the right thing" face.
Xander took a step forward, looking like he was about an inch away from punching Spike in the nose. "I said let her go. You're so pathetic, Spike. You know she'll never be with you. You're a worthless, soulless, demon. You'd kill us all if it weren't for that chip." He held up the stake that he'd been holding in one tightly clenched fist. "In fact, I think I'm just going to get rid of your sorry ass right now."
Spike growled at the boy. "Back off, Harris. I'm warning you. And I'm only going to do it once."
Xander tightened his grip on the stake. "What can you possibly do to me? Hit me? Then collapse in pain, and wait while I stake you? Let's just skip to step three."
Buffy moved quickly, disarming Xander. "Xander! Back OFF! He doesn't have me in any kind of... of... mental thrall or anything. And he will kick your ass, and I don't want you two to fight, so stop."
Xander glared over Buffy's shoulder. "He can't hurt me, Buffy. Just let me get it over with. He could be making you think that you aren't in a thrall, when you actually are and are trying to make us think that he thinks that we don't know what he knows-"
"It doesn't even WORK, Xander! My God!" She tore out an exasperated breath.
Xander had been continuing his rant, when he suddenly stopped in mid scathing remark to stare at Buffy. "What? Please tell me you're talking about the coffee maker."
"Good lord," Giles said. "Chains. We must make sure he-"
Meanwhile, Spike was just staring at Buffy. She'd just blurted that out. He had not intended for the others to know... probably ever. But, cover blown. "Calm down. It hasn't worked for over two bleedin' months. If I'd wanted to kill you, you'd all be dead." Unfortunately, no one was listening to him.
Dawn was sending him distressed looks, while Willow yelped about a truth spell or some such nonsense, and Tara just looked bewildered at all the noise. Anya was glaring at Xander for his shouted remarks along the lines of soulless killer, vengeful, evil, and all things "Heart of Darkness".
"Oh, God." Buffy's mind had finally caught up with her mouth.
Giles had a few strong lengths of rope in his hands and was asking (loudly) for someone to restrain 'the vampire' so that he could tie him to something.
Xander was shouting at Buffy something like, "ARE YOU INSANE!!?"
Buffy was looking at Spike, truly distressed. "STOP IT, XANDER! I'm not-"
Spike stood up on top of his cot, and let out a piercing whistle that got everyone's attention. Still, he felt the need to shout. "THAT'S BLOODY ENOUGH!!" Looked at the now silent group. "Look at you. All of you. Is this the way an Ohana behaves? You're supposed to be a bleedin' family! Not a bunch of cats and dogs!" Looked at Giles. "Put the bloody ropes down, Watcher. I'm not doing anything wrong." Looked to Willow. "And, Red, thanks for nothing. I thought you were one of the few who actually *liked* me. I guess I was wrong." Finally, turned a stone cold glare on Xander. "And you, Harris. The chip doesn't work. Hasn't for months. I'm dating Buffy. I love her. So sit down, shut up, and get over it." Hopped off the cot and stalked into the back room, pushing past the assembled Scoobies and closing the door behind him.
Buffy sat, looked at all of them. "Happy now?"
Giles slowly laid his lengths of rope down, and set about putting the lens back in his glasses silently.
Xander just fishmouthed, alternately at Buffy and at the closed door.
"I'm just... I'm trying to be happy. And how DARE you JUDGE *ME*, Xander??? Hello, much? Mummy-girl, Mantis teacher, and an ex-vengeance demon??"
The boy paled. "But.. but.. It's... *Spike*!" Said in the same tone one might use for the word 'mucus'.
Laughed. "Yeah. And the sex is great." Gave her watcher a warning glance. "Spike will not be *tied* to anything. Ever. Do you hear me?"
Giles looked chagrined. "Yes."
Xander stared at her. "Wait a minute. Back the truck up, park it, go back inside, and pick up the phone. You and Spike have had *sex*!?" There was that tone again.
Figured it was too late to take back anything she'd said. "Lots. Of mind- blowing sex. Are you the only one allowed to do that?"
Xander's response was totally understandable. He sat down. Without a chair.
Anya said practically. "Well, he's not the only one. And I mean, who is he to deny anyone the kind of sex we have??"
Xander looked about ready to pass out. "Ayn!"
"What? It's TRUE! Buffy's finally gotten out of that irritating 'poor me, Riley's gone' stage. Isn't that good? I mean, isn't it?" Looked around for support.
Giles was busily attempting to get the Ohana ready to go, and ignoring the strange things going on behind him.
Buffy ran a hand through her hair, and sighed. "This is how things are going to be for the foreseeable future. I suggest you adjust." She slipped off the cot, into the back room.
Spike was sitting on the bed, growling and muttering to himself, fiddling with the edge of the quilt that was folded next to him. The one Madison'd given him.
She sat next to him, didn't say a word, just sighed, and leaned her head on his shoulder.
Slowly, the growling gave way to a quiet purr, and he tilted his head sideways, resting his cheek atop her head. Tried for a bit of humor. "That went well, I think."
"Oh, yeah... Just like averting apocalypses... Quick and painless..."
Snort, and a half chuckle. "Could've gone worse, though. I'm not tied to anything, or spending the remainder of this trip in the ashtray."
Turned her head into his shoulder. Gave a forced smile. "Yeah."
He put an arm around her, and laid back slowly, pulling her with him. Sighed. "So. When I come out next time. Think Harris'll play nice? Or should I invent a stake-proof vest?"
"I don't know. I'm hoping they play nice." Stared blankly ahead.
He gave a snort, that ended in a half growl. "Slayer. Remember the rules? Tell me what's bothering you. Let me in."
Half smile, shrug. "I'm ok."
Quiet growl. "No. You are not 'okay'." Sat up. "God, Slayer. All I want is for you to talk to me. Trust me. Is that too much to ask?"
Laid there a moment, then sat up, too. "That was hard for me. It was... huge, and harsh, and... hard."
He turned, sitting cross-legged on the bed facing her. Giving her his full attention. "I know. Wasn't exactly a picnic for anyone in that room. Save Niblet and Tara, maybe."
Quietly, "I hurt them."
He cupped her cheek gently. "Buffy... You should feel better now. No more hiding. They'll get over it. They always do. Besides. I don't think you hurt 'em. Surprised the bloody freakin' hell out of 'em, yeah. But hurt 'em? I don't think so, luv. Pissed off the Whelp. Confused the Watcher. But no hurt."
"I yelled at Xander. I hate doing that."
Snort. "Wanker deserved it. Acting like I'm some sort of plague. I may not show it that often, but I *do* have feelings, you know. And that hurt. We'd all been doin' so well. I'd hoped that, when they found out about the chip, it wouldn't matter anymore." Got progressively quieter as he continued. "Guess the joke's on me, eh?"
She bit her lip. Hadn't thought about it from his angle before. Stroked a hand over his cheek. "It was just a surprise, Spike. It'll get better."
He shrugged a little. "Yeah. And that's what I've been trying to tell you, luv." Snorted. "And now you've gone and gotten me all depressed. But, I did notice something."
"What?"
He gestured at the door. Smiled at her. "You didn't lock it."
Gave a little laugh. "Think that was amazing?"
Spike grinned. "You bet I do. In fact, you probably have no idea how much that little fact means to me, luv."
"Then I wonder what you'll think about this?" Kissed him gently.
He purred and put a hand on her shoulder, gently running it up and down her arm. Said quietly, "Combined with the non locked door? I find it unbelievable."
Smiled against his mouth, kissed him again.
He responded, pulling her to him gently and letting a hand roam around her back softly.
Small sigh, one hand trailing through his hair. The small knock on the door had Buffy pulling back. "Yeah?"
"Buffy? Can, can I come in?" Willow.
Glanced at Spike. "Sure, Will."
Spike was a little miffed, but! A plus. She'd kept the one hand that was in his hair in place. Not yanking away as if he was made out of hot coals or something. "Come in, Red."
Willow walked in meekly, closing the door behind her. Stared at Spike with her Resolve Face.
He sighed. Braced himself for another 'if you hurt her' rant.
"I'm sorry I didn't stand up for you out there."
And that was not what he'd been expecting. Cocked his head. "Uh.. That's okay, Red... Really.. I can handle myself."
"Well, yeah... but... ya know... everyone can use support, and... I just... I worry, about Buffy, and, I just want her to be happy, but... unhurting, in the aching, broken heart way, and-" God, she was babbling.
Spike was taken aback. Just grinned. Looked at Buffy with a 'are you hearing this, or is it just me?' look.
Buffy gave Willow a smile in thanks.
Willow continued, "But... but... if Buffy is happy. Safe. Then that's what matters."
Spike nodded. "You're totally right, Willow."
She gave a nervous nod, fidgeted a minute, then. "Well... That was kinda all." Slipped back out the door.
Spike just sat there, like he was expecting the world to end or something. Cocked his head in consideration at the door. That made three Scoobies besides Buffy that liked him, then.
Buffy wagged a finger at him. "See what you get for yelling at her?"
He gave her a sheepish look. "Well.. I.. All I heard her say was some crap 'bout a truth spell. Not fun, those things are. I don't even want to know what I'd wind up blurting out."
Groaned. "Oh, God, me either."
He chuckled. "If you were under a truth spell, what's the worst thing you could say, luv? Not that much 'bout you that everyone doesn't already know. Now me. I've got a history. Things I don't even want to think about, let alone tell anyone about." Shook his head. "By the time I was through, you all'd know the history of everything I've ever done. And then some."
"Which would include things I never wanna hear about. And, well, they know EVERYTHING about me, now." Shook her head. "I need to learn to shut my mouth."
He chuckled. "Never happen. Took me a century to learn. You don't have that long..." Made a face. "God.. I never thought about that before."
Shook her head. "Mm-mm... Not going to. Not gonna think about it. Give me about... what? Eight, ten more years? I'm going to enjoy them."
He looked at her. "Just ten? Hell no. You're gonna make it to eighty, at least. You have to. I- The whole bleedin' world needs you, Slayer."
Smiled and laid back on the bed. "It's ok, Spike. We all have expiration dates. Mine's just like milk, while everyone else's is like Cheetoh's. The world just needs a Slayer."
He growled softly, disturbed. Stared at the wall.
"Stop growling. You're making the bed shake."
He glanced back at her. "What'll I do? All of you. All humans. You just... You're here for awhile, then you leave. And I'll be alone." Looked back at the wall. Growled shakily.
She sat up, hugged against his back. ""Not for a long time. You'll meet others. Other kind people. Have other loves, have more adventures."
Pushed back against her. Said stubbornly, "No. Only you. Once you all are gone..." Shrugged a little. "I might as well just stake myself. Either that or-" Shudder. "Find Peaches. Cause I doubt that by that time I'll even be able to *play* the Big Bad anymore. Not after hanging around you lot for God knows how long."
Could not imagine a world without his smart-assed smirk. Stopped hugging him to smack his shoulder. "You'll *never* stake yourself."
He jumped and looked at her. "Why not, luv? No reason for me to stick around if you all are gone." Ooh. Hoped she hadn't noticed the 'all' in that sentence. Hell. He didn't even know where it'd come from.
Glared at him. "Because life is better than hell. Ask Angel. He'll tell you."
Sighed. "Not without someone to love, Buffy. Life is a living hell when you're alone."
"How am I- we, how are we, supposed to be at peace, knowing you're in hell??"
Cocked his head at her. Gave a small smile. "Okay, luv. Okay. I'll stick around. For you. Till some nasty finally gets the best of the old Big Bad. After that... Fate to the wind." Added the word 'literally' in his mind.
Kissed the back of his neck, to the side of his shoulder. "You'll be ok."
He sighed, and leaned back against her again. "Yeah. Thanks, luv. For caring."
Kissed the other side of his neck.
He leaned his head, letting her explore a little. Rolled an eye to look at her as best he could.
Smirked at him as she bit at his neck.
He chuckled a little. "Hmm. Now, remind me which one of us is the vampire?"
Licked slowly up his neck. "I forget," she whispered at him.
He shivered pleasurably and let out a soft, happy growl. Slid one hand up her shirt to play along her side.
She bit at the underside of his jaw softly. Planted kisses along it.
That deep purr started, and his eyes closed to better concentrate on the sensations.
She ran her hands over him softly. Kissed him again. "Tell me it'll be better."
Opened his eyes and smiled at her. "It will. I promise you."
Bit her lip, nodded.
Cocked his head at her. "Something else botherin' you, luv?"
"I want to walk out there and have things be better. Be ok. And it's not."
He sighed. "They've probably already sorted it out, luv. Why don't you go and see?"
Shook her head. "Giles has a very patented British look of disappointment that makes me feel about three years old."
He chuckled. "I know that look. It's not just you he uses it on, luv." Sighed. "I hope he's not usin' it now, though. Cause, up until about half an hour ago, I thought he liked me." Snort. "Out the window with that theory."
"We don't know that. We just... We have to be tough."
He straightened his back. "Are you implying that *I* am not tough? Cause you saw what I did to the last guy who called me soft."
"Right. Tough," she said ironically. "Like a marshmallow."
He growled, and turned his back on her.
Ran her fingers up his sides. "Look at you. Pouting."
Snorted. "Not pouting. Sulking. There's a difference."
Ran her fingers around to play over his abs. "Very big difference."
He chuckled slightly. "You see right through me, don't you? When did that happen?"
Bit at the back of his neck. "When you knocked over that Welcome to Sunnydale sign..."
Chuckled again. "I hate that bloody thing. If I'm drivin' when we get back, I'm flattening it again."
Laughed. Then, "How do we act when we go out of here?"
Cocked his head. "We don't act. We are. We just.. do what we do. They'll deal. They've got to get used to it."
"But I'm not used to it yet. What do I do?"
"Just don't act like you regret it, Slayer. That's all I ask." Sighed. "If you want to avoid me. Or go out there without me. I understand. I was gonna... I dunno. Take a nap, or something." Muttered, "Even though I just got up."
"Come out with me."
He grinned. "I was hoping you'd say that." Stood up, held a hand out for her.
She smiled and took it. "I don't know if I can do this." Gestured to their linked hands. "I feel like we're... rubbing it in or something."
He helped her off the bed, then released her hand. "Okay with me, luv. We can go baby steps around them. Although I think you kind of blew that when you blurted out about the-" A-hem. "-'mind-blowing sex' we've had." Male pride in the grin on that one.
Closed her eyes in chagrin.
He chuckled and grinned at her. "I did hear correctly, right?"
Small blush stole over her cheeks. "Yup."
Bigger grin, and stood up a bit straighter. "Thought so."
Hit him in the chest. "Shut up. It takes two, ya know."
Grin changed to a smile. "I noticed, luv. Believe me."
She tried to quell the smile. Unsuccessfully.
Gave her a playful shove. "Ah! See? It's not just me. You're a right bit proud of yourself, too. And rightly so." Cocked an eyebrow and grinned.
Rolled her eyes. "Please shut up."
He chuckled, then made a show of the 'zipping lips' gesture, and held the imaginary key out to her.
She gave a small, tense smile and reached for the doorknob.
He gave a sigh, and moved to stand behind her. There was music on the other side of the door, and it was time to face it.
From the booth, Xander studiously avoided looking at Spike. He didn't exist in the boy's world. He did cast a few betrayed looks in the Slayer's direction, but remained silent.
Buffy winced because the looks hurt her, even the appealing glances she sent his way did nothing to soften his glare.
Spike put a reassuring hand on her shoulder for an instant. Just an instant. Then moved to look around at the others. Xander... well, nothing had changed. Giles was driving. Moved his look to the Wiccas.
Tara gave him an encouraging nod and shy smile. Willow just smiled at him for a moment, then turned back to Tara.
He offered them a quick grin, and moved to sit on the edge of the booth. The very edge. Too close for Xander. Xander got up and went to sit in the passenger's seat. Spike just watched him, making a quiet, frustrated noise in his throat.
Buffy sent him her 'what are we gonna do' face, while Dawn moved up into the booth with him.
He kind of shrugged at Buffy, then gave Dawn a grin. "Hey, Bit."
"Hey, Spike." Handed him a package of crackers sympathetically.
He chuckled, and opened the package, putting on in his mouth and chewing slowly. Held the package out to Dawn.
She took one, chewed. After swallowing, said clearly, but not fakely, "Congrats."
Cocked head from the vampire.
"With Buffy. I hope things go well." Her allegiance pledged.
He gave her a grin. That was his Brave Little Toaster. "Thanks, Platelet. So do I."
She nodded.
==========================================- ==============================================
It felt odd to be in a hotel after only one night in the Ohana. But Giles had been right. They needed some apart time. Spike lay sprawled across his bed, bored. Then perked up when he rolled over on his cell phone. Dialed quickly.
Giggled, "Hello?"
"Madison? You busy?"
Muffled noise from her end. "I'll catch up," she called. Came back to the phone. "Never too busy for you."
It made him feel good to hear her sound happy. "What'd I interrupt?"
"Just went out with a friend."
"Oh?" Tried to keep the growl out of his voice. "Girl friend, or are we talking a male of the species?"
Small smile. "Male of the species. But he's not... anything. He's just... Trevor."
Snort.
"Puppy. I swear."
Quiet whimper. "I'm just bein' a guard Puppy, pet. You know me."
Warm smile that he could feel through the phone. "I know. And know that Madison is being Guard Madison. No boys. For a long time. Only friends."
"Well... okay." Got excited. "Guess what."
"Hmm?"
"Phase 2 complete as of last night." He was purring.
"Oh, Puppy! Really??"
Laughed. "Would I joke about this?! And! The Scoobies know. And you were right about something else. Buffy learned scritching."
Dry applauding. "Well. SHE gets a cookie for picking up on THAT one..."
"Aww. Come on, pet! She's tryin'."
"Yeah yeah. Trying. Two points for Buffy."
"Well, she promised stuff, too. Everything you suggested. And one more."
Huge grin. "What else?"
Sounded happy, excited, maybe even a little awed. "That she wouldn't let things drive her into the ground before she'd let me help. That she'd let me in. Let me love her." Sighed. "And even better. She cares, Madison. Really cares about me."
"Of course she does, Puppy."
"Yeah. But she *said* it this time."
Quiet 'aww' noise. "Good. You deserve that."
He sighed, and she could practically see him cuddle down against the pillows happily. "She made me promise never to stake myself. Even after all of 'em are long gone and I'm alone. Made me swear. Said that she and the other's wouldn't be able to rest in peace knowin' that I was in hell. Guess I'm doomed to live forever."
Small smile. "Guess so. Gonna come visit me when I'm old?"
"Of course. By then they'll probably have invented SPF 5,000,000 sunblock for vamps. We'll go for walks in a park or something." Strained slightly. Didn't like thinking of when they'd be gone. Even Madison couldn't live forever. He hugged his stuffed cat.
"Puppy?"
Snapped out of it. "Huh? What?"
"Loving us while we're here makes us live forever in you."
Oh God.. He hoped she hadn't heard that sniffle. Cleared his throat. "Uh.. Yeah. Thanks, pet."
She slouched against the brick of a building. "I was just trying to cheer you up. Don't cry."
Defensive. "M'not cryin'. Allergies."
Indignant snap. "Don't you ever lie to me."
Whimper, cause Puppies do that. "Sorry. I just... I haven't lost anyone in awhile, you know? 'Cept for Joyce, and that was kind of belated. And I have the others. I just.. I don't know what I'm gonna do when I'm the last Scooby." And when he'd started thinking of himself *as* a Scooby, he didn't even know.
"Maybe you could help the next Slayer."
Glumly. "Wouldn't be the same." Slightly accusatory tone. "When I called you, I was in a *good* mood." Joking undertone, though.
Grinned. "You brought it up." Excited tone. "Guess what?"
"What?"
"My hair is officially back to normal." Tugged on one end. Smiled at it.
"That's great, pet!" Added under his breath. "Now I can stop worrying all the bloody time."
Laughed. "Don't worry about me. Geez. I have Will hovering. Still. I'm fine." A little more sincerely. "Fine."
He sighed. "Good. I guess I'd better let you get back to your friend. We can talk later, though, right? Maybe you call when you get home?"
"Ok. It'll be a while. He's mad because I haven't eaten yet today, so we have to stop." Rolled her eyes.
He chuckled. "Alright. Talk to you later, pet."
"I love you, Puppy."
"I love you too, Madison." They hung up. Spike sighed. Bored again. Hmm. Maybe his 'girlfriend' - Grinned at that word- would want to do something. Time to find the Slayer.
It was easier than he thought. Buffy was kicking a vending machine in the hallway.
Decided to surprise her. "Need help saving the world from evil vending machines, Slayer? What'd it do, take your money?"
She jumped slightly. Gave the machine a glare. "It won't give me my Cheetoh's."
He walked up to the offending machine, gave it a good looking over, cocked his head at it, then slammed his palm against the junction between the glass and metal, halfway down the machine. Two bags of Cheetoh's, three packages of powdered donuts, and one package of Oreo's fell into the retrieval bin. Not to mention that Buffy's money made a return appearance as well. And it brought about five bucks worth of friends with it. Spike grinned. "Helps to know someone with a magic touch, doesn't it, luv?"
Rolled her eyes with a smile. "Yay! Loot. I don't feel like sharing. Your room."
He grinned again, and helped her gather up the treats and cash, taking it back to his room with her right behind him. Deposited the stuff on the bed.
Collapsed on the bed beside the stuff, opened one of the Cheetoh bags. Buffy crunched a couple of her Cheetoh's. "I was thinking. Maybe I should talk to Xander... apologize for being so mean about everything."
Spike swallowed the powdered donut that he'd been chewing. "No. You shouldn't."
Pursed her lips at him. "Why not?"
"Cause he doesn't deserve it, that's why." Slight growl in the tone.
Slightly surprised, almost upset, "Spike! Why?"
Growl. "Cause of the way he looked at you today, that's why! Did you even notice?!" Snarl. "If that Harris wanker ever, and I mean *ever* looks at you the way he did today again, like he's bleedin' disgusted with you... I'll personally tear his head of, throw it out the window, and use his intestines for a jumprope."
She sat up to level a disgustedly angry glare at him. Enunciated clearly, "Over my broken, bleeding body you will."
A flash of her body, after the demon had thrown her, went through his mind. Her.. crumpled on the ground, bleeding, dying. His eyes got huge, he growled and grabbed her by the shoulders, shaking her slightly. "Don't you EVER say anything like that again! Never! Do you hear me!? Don't even think it!"
She pulled away quickly, confusedly. "Spike, *what* is your problem?"
He looked at her, blue eyes wide and a little watery. "You.. in the alley. Broken. Bleeding. Dying." Growled to hide a sniff. Said forcefully, "YOU didn't see how pale you were. YOU didn't have to sit there and watch helplessly as the person you loved slipped away from you. You weren't covered in the blood of a person you care about. You weren't watching you, Slayer. I was. And I've never felt so helpless, or alone in my life. Never." By the end of his speech, he'd turned his back to her and was trying to compose himself.
She bit her lip, and moved behind him, stroking his back. "I'm sorry."
He muttered quietly, "Not your fault. Just... I don't want to.. Don't want you to.. Not after all we've been through.." He was trembling a little with the force it took to ward off the tears that were threatening him.
She slowly turned him to her, wrapped her arms around him. She'd never seen this side of him. So many facets to this enigma of a man. This one was letting her see maybe why Madison called him 'Puppy'. "I'm here now. I'm ok."
He leaned into her, resting his head on her shoulder. Snuffled. "I know.. Sorry. Bloody hell.." Didn't pull away, though.
Her hands moved over his back, played in his hair, stroked down his arms.
He sniffled a little more, and put his arms around her. "You're good at this, luv." Purred softly.
Nuzzled at his neck. "Thank you."
The sudden tenseness of her muscles was enough to wake Spike a little. "Luv..", he muttered, still mostly asleep. "Relax a little, could you? It's like cuddling a board." All this was said too low for the observers to hear.
Bit her lip. Repeatedly, harshly. "Spike... It's... it's time to get up." Her voice was quiet, but an uncomfortable pitch.
He responded only by trying to hide his nose in her hair.
"Spike." A little more insistent. A little more nervous. A little more high-pitched.
That got his attention. "What's wrong, luv.." Trailed off as he regained enough consciousness to feel the eyes staring at them. Oh yeah. His brilliant plan... which was now seeming a lot less than brilliant. Tried for a good-natured sounding voice. "Oh. Mornin', all."
It was a reflex for Buffy to move back slightly. "Morning, guys..."
Spike tightened his arm around her. An unspoken reminder of what they'd planned. Looked at the group. Decided to be blunt today. "What? Never seen a bloke cuddle with his girlfriend?"
Xander balked, and looked as if he was going to be sick. "In your dreams. Get off her, Spike." Totally ignored the fact that it was *her* that was mostly on *him*.
Giles cleaned his glasses.
Buffy exhaled a quiet, "Oh, God..." Sat up slowly. "Ok... We need to talk..."
Spike sat up next to her, keeping a hand on her leg. Holding what was his.
Xander looked at her. "Buffy, please tell me that Evil Dead has finally gone around the bend."
Shook her head slowly at him. "No, Xand." She bit her lip again. "We're, uh... Spike and I... it's... we're... together." Not the most graceful thing she had blurted out, she knew.
Xander took a step back, then turned a look of pure hatred on the vampire. "Let her go, Dead-boy Junior. You've got her in some sort of vampy mind trick, don't you?"
Spike just snorted, and glanced around at the others, gauging their reactions.
Giles was vigorously cleaning his glasses. Rubbing so hard, that one of the lenses came out in his hand. "Bloody hell."
Buffy glanced at Dawn, who was giving her full-support looks. Well, duh. Willow was doing that, "I love you, but I'm so very nervous, are you sure this is the right thing" face.
Xander took a step forward, looking like he was about an inch away from punching Spike in the nose. "I said let her go. You're so pathetic, Spike. You know she'll never be with you. You're a worthless, soulless, demon. You'd kill us all if it weren't for that chip." He held up the stake that he'd been holding in one tightly clenched fist. "In fact, I think I'm just going to get rid of your sorry ass right now."
Spike growled at the boy. "Back off, Harris. I'm warning you. And I'm only going to do it once."
Xander tightened his grip on the stake. "What can you possibly do to me? Hit me? Then collapse in pain, and wait while I stake you? Let's just skip to step three."
Buffy moved quickly, disarming Xander. "Xander! Back OFF! He doesn't have me in any kind of... of... mental thrall or anything. And he will kick your ass, and I don't want you two to fight, so stop."
Xander glared over Buffy's shoulder. "He can't hurt me, Buffy. Just let me get it over with. He could be making you think that you aren't in a thrall, when you actually are and are trying to make us think that he thinks that we don't know what he knows-"
"It doesn't even WORK, Xander! My God!" She tore out an exasperated breath.
Xander had been continuing his rant, when he suddenly stopped in mid scathing remark to stare at Buffy. "What? Please tell me you're talking about the coffee maker."
"Good lord," Giles said. "Chains. We must make sure he-"
Meanwhile, Spike was just staring at Buffy. She'd just blurted that out. He had not intended for the others to know... probably ever. But, cover blown. "Calm down. It hasn't worked for over two bleedin' months. If I'd wanted to kill you, you'd all be dead." Unfortunately, no one was listening to him.
Dawn was sending him distressed looks, while Willow yelped about a truth spell or some such nonsense, and Tara just looked bewildered at all the noise. Anya was glaring at Xander for his shouted remarks along the lines of soulless killer, vengeful, evil, and all things "Heart of Darkness".
"Oh, God." Buffy's mind had finally caught up with her mouth.
Giles had a few strong lengths of rope in his hands and was asking (loudly) for someone to restrain 'the vampire' so that he could tie him to something.
Xander was shouting at Buffy something like, "ARE YOU INSANE!!?"
Buffy was looking at Spike, truly distressed. "STOP IT, XANDER! I'm not-"
Spike stood up on top of his cot, and let out a piercing whistle that got everyone's attention. Still, he felt the need to shout. "THAT'S BLOODY ENOUGH!!" Looked at the now silent group. "Look at you. All of you. Is this the way an Ohana behaves? You're supposed to be a bleedin' family! Not a bunch of cats and dogs!" Looked at Giles. "Put the bloody ropes down, Watcher. I'm not doing anything wrong." Looked to Willow. "And, Red, thanks for nothing. I thought you were one of the few who actually *liked* me. I guess I was wrong." Finally, turned a stone cold glare on Xander. "And you, Harris. The chip doesn't work. Hasn't for months. I'm dating Buffy. I love her. So sit down, shut up, and get over it." Hopped off the cot and stalked into the back room, pushing past the assembled Scoobies and closing the door behind him.
Buffy sat, looked at all of them. "Happy now?"
Giles slowly laid his lengths of rope down, and set about putting the lens back in his glasses silently.
Xander just fishmouthed, alternately at Buffy and at the closed door.
"I'm just... I'm trying to be happy. And how DARE you JUDGE *ME*, Xander??? Hello, much? Mummy-girl, Mantis teacher, and an ex-vengeance demon??"
The boy paled. "But.. but.. It's... *Spike*!" Said in the same tone one might use for the word 'mucus'.
Laughed. "Yeah. And the sex is great." Gave her watcher a warning glance. "Spike will not be *tied* to anything. Ever. Do you hear me?"
Giles looked chagrined. "Yes."
Xander stared at her. "Wait a minute. Back the truck up, park it, go back inside, and pick up the phone. You and Spike have had *sex*!?" There was that tone again.
Figured it was too late to take back anything she'd said. "Lots. Of mind- blowing sex. Are you the only one allowed to do that?"
Xander's response was totally understandable. He sat down. Without a chair.
Anya said practically. "Well, he's not the only one. And I mean, who is he to deny anyone the kind of sex we have??"
Xander looked about ready to pass out. "Ayn!"
"What? It's TRUE! Buffy's finally gotten out of that irritating 'poor me, Riley's gone' stage. Isn't that good? I mean, isn't it?" Looked around for support.
Giles was busily attempting to get the Ohana ready to go, and ignoring the strange things going on behind him.
Buffy ran a hand through her hair, and sighed. "This is how things are going to be for the foreseeable future. I suggest you adjust." She slipped off the cot, into the back room.
Spike was sitting on the bed, growling and muttering to himself, fiddling with the edge of the quilt that was folded next to him. The one Madison'd given him.
She sat next to him, didn't say a word, just sighed, and leaned her head on his shoulder.
Slowly, the growling gave way to a quiet purr, and he tilted his head sideways, resting his cheek atop her head. Tried for a bit of humor. "That went well, I think."
"Oh, yeah... Just like averting apocalypses... Quick and painless..."
Snort, and a half chuckle. "Could've gone worse, though. I'm not tied to anything, or spending the remainder of this trip in the ashtray."
Turned her head into his shoulder. Gave a forced smile. "Yeah."
He put an arm around her, and laid back slowly, pulling her with him. Sighed. "So. When I come out next time. Think Harris'll play nice? Or should I invent a stake-proof vest?"
"I don't know. I'm hoping they play nice." Stared blankly ahead.
He gave a snort, that ended in a half growl. "Slayer. Remember the rules? Tell me what's bothering you. Let me in."
Half smile, shrug. "I'm ok."
Quiet growl. "No. You are not 'okay'." Sat up. "God, Slayer. All I want is for you to talk to me. Trust me. Is that too much to ask?"
Laid there a moment, then sat up, too. "That was hard for me. It was... huge, and harsh, and... hard."
He turned, sitting cross-legged on the bed facing her. Giving her his full attention. "I know. Wasn't exactly a picnic for anyone in that room. Save Niblet and Tara, maybe."
Quietly, "I hurt them."
He cupped her cheek gently. "Buffy... You should feel better now. No more hiding. They'll get over it. They always do. Besides. I don't think you hurt 'em. Surprised the bloody freakin' hell out of 'em, yeah. But hurt 'em? I don't think so, luv. Pissed off the Whelp. Confused the Watcher. But no hurt."
"I yelled at Xander. I hate doing that."
Snort. "Wanker deserved it. Acting like I'm some sort of plague. I may not show it that often, but I *do* have feelings, you know. And that hurt. We'd all been doin' so well. I'd hoped that, when they found out about the chip, it wouldn't matter anymore." Got progressively quieter as he continued. "Guess the joke's on me, eh?"
She bit her lip. Hadn't thought about it from his angle before. Stroked a hand over his cheek. "It was just a surprise, Spike. It'll get better."
He shrugged a little. "Yeah. And that's what I've been trying to tell you, luv." Snorted. "And now you've gone and gotten me all depressed. But, I did notice something."
"What?"
He gestured at the door. Smiled at her. "You didn't lock it."
Gave a little laugh. "Think that was amazing?"
Spike grinned. "You bet I do. In fact, you probably have no idea how much that little fact means to me, luv."
"Then I wonder what you'll think about this?" Kissed him gently.
He purred and put a hand on her shoulder, gently running it up and down her arm. Said quietly, "Combined with the non locked door? I find it unbelievable."
Smiled against his mouth, kissed him again.
He responded, pulling her to him gently and letting a hand roam around her back softly.
Small sigh, one hand trailing through his hair. The small knock on the door had Buffy pulling back. "Yeah?"
"Buffy? Can, can I come in?" Willow.
Glanced at Spike. "Sure, Will."
Spike was a little miffed, but! A plus. She'd kept the one hand that was in his hair in place. Not yanking away as if he was made out of hot coals or something. "Come in, Red."
Willow walked in meekly, closing the door behind her. Stared at Spike with her Resolve Face.
He sighed. Braced himself for another 'if you hurt her' rant.
"I'm sorry I didn't stand up for you out there."
And that was not what he'd been expecting. Cocked his head. "Uh.. That's okay, Red... Really.. I can handle myself."
"Well, yeah... but... ya know... everyone can use support, and... I just... I worry, about Buffy, and, I just want her to be happy, but... unhurting, in the aching, broken heart way, and-" God, she was babbling.
Spike was taken aback. Just grinned. Looked at Buffy with a 'are you hearing this, or is it just me?' look.
Buffy gave Willow a smile in thanks.
Willow continued, "But... but... if Buffy is happy. Safe. Then that's what matters."
Spike nodded. "You're totally right, Willow."
She gave a nervous nod, fidgeted a minute, then. "Well... That was kinda all." Slipped back out the door.
Spike just sat there, like he was expecting the world to end or something. Cocked his head in consideration at the door. That made three Scoobies besides Buffy that liked him, then.
Buffy wagged a finger at him. "See what you get for yelling at her?"
He gave her a sheepish look. "Well.. I.. All I heard her say was some crap 'bout a truth spell. Not fun, those things are. I don't even want to know what I'd wind up blurting out."
Groaned. "Oh, God, me either."
He chuckled. "If you were under a truth spell, what's the worst thing you could say, luv? Not that much 'bout you that everyone doesn't already know. Now me. I've got a history. Things I don't even want to think about, let alone tell anyone about." Shook his head. "By the time I was through, you all'd know the history of everything I've ever done. And then some."
"Which would include things I never wanna hear about. And, well, they know EVERYTHING about me, now." Shook her head. "I need to learn to shut my mouth."
He chuckled. "Never happen. Took me a century to learn. You don't have that long..." Made a face. "God.. I never thought about that before."
Shook her head. "Mm-mm... Not going to. Not gonna think about it. Give me about... what? Eight, ten more years? I'm going to enjoy them."
He looked at her. "Just ten? Hell no. You're gonna make it to eighty, at least. You have to. I- The whole bleedin' world needs you, Slayer."
Smiled and laid back on the bed. "It's ok, Spike. We all have expiration dates. Mine's just like milk, while everyone else's is like Cheetoh's. The world just needs a Slayer."
He growled softly, disturbed. Stared at the wall.
"Stop growling. You're making the bed shake."
He glanced back at her. "What'll I do? All of you. All humans. You just... You're here for awhile, then you leave. And I'll be alone." Looked back at the wall. Growled shakily.
She sat up, hugged against his back. ""Not for a long time. You'll meet others. Other kind people. Have other loves, have more adventures."
Pushed back against her. Said stubbornly, "No. Only you. Once you all are gone..." Shrugged a little. "I might as well just stake myself. Either that or-" Shudder. "Find Peaches. Cause I doubt that by that time I'll even be able to *play* the Big Bad anymore. Not after hanging around you lot for God knows how long."
Could not imagine a world without his smart-assed smirk. Stopped hugging him to smack his shoulder. "You'll *never* stake yourself."
He jumped and looked at her. "Why not, luv? No reason for me to stick around if you all are gone." Ooh. Hoped she hadn't noticed the 'all' in that sentence. Hell. He didn't even know where it'd come from.
Glared at him. "Because life is better than hell. Ask Angel. He'll tell you."
Sighed. "Not without someone to love, Buffy. Life is a living hell when you're alone."
"How am I- we, how are we, supposed to be at peace, knowing you're in hell??"
Cocked his head at her. Gave a small smile. "Okay, luv. Okay. I'll stick around. For you. Till some nasty finally gets the best of the old Big Bad. After that... Fate to the wind." Added the word 'literally' in his mind.
Kissed the back of his neck, to the side of his shoulder. "You'll be ok."
He sighed, and leaned back against her again. "Yeah. Thanks, luv. For caring."
Kissed the other side of his neck.
He leaned his head, letting her explore a little. Rolled an eye to look at her as best he could.
Smirked at him as she bit at his neck.
He chuckled a little. "Hmm. Now, remind me which one of us is the vampire?"
Licked slowly up his neck. "I forget," she whispered at him.
He shivered pleasurably and let out a soft, happy growl. Slid one hand up her shirt to play along her side.
She bit at the underside of his jaw softly. Planted kisses along it.
That deep purr started, and his eyes closed to better concentrate on the sensations.
She ran her hands over him softly. Kissed him again. "Tell me it'll be better."
Opened his eyes and smiled at her. "It will. I promise you."
Bit her lip, nodded.
Cocked his head at her. "Something else botherin' you, luv?"
"I want to walk out there and have things be better. Be ok. And it's not."
He sighed. "They've probably already sorted it out, luv. Why don't you go and see?"
Shook her head. "Giles has a very patented British look of disappointment that makes me feel about three years old."
He chuckled. "I know that look. It's not just you he uses it on, luv." Sighed. "I hope he's not usin' it now, though. Cause, up until about half an hour ago, I thought he liked me." Snort. "Out the window with that theory."
"We don't know that. We just... We have to be tough."
He straightened his back. "Are you implying that *I* am not tough? Cause you saw what I did to the last guy who called me soft."
"Right. Tough," she said ironically. "Like a marshmallow."
He growled, and turned his back on her.
Ran her fingers up his sides. "Look at you. Pouting."
Snorted. "Not pouting. Sulking. There's a difference."
Ran her fingers around to play over his abs. "Very big difference."
He chuckled slightly. "You see right through me, don't you? When did that happen?"
Bit at the back of his neck. "When you knocked over that Welcome to Sunnydale sign..."
Chuckled again. "I hate that bloody thing. If I'm drivin' when we get back, I'm flattening it again."
Laughed. Then, "How do we act when we go out of here?"
Cocked his head. "We don't act. We are. We just.. do what we do. They'll deal. They've got to get used to it."
"But I'm not used to it yet. What do I do?"
"Just don't act like you regret it, Slayer. That's all I ask." Sighed. "If you want to avoid me. Or go out there without me. I understand. I was gonna... I dunno. Take a nap, or something." Muttered, "Even though I just got up."
"Come out with me."
He grinned. "I was hoping you'd say that." Stood up, held a hand out for her.
She smiled and took it. "I don't know if I can do this." Gestured to their linked hands. "I feel like we're... rubbing it in or something."
He helped her off the bed, then released her hand. "Okay with me, luv. We can go baby steps around them. Although I think you kind of blew that when you blurted out about the-" A-hem. "-'mind-blowing sex' we've had." Male pride in the grin on that one.
Closed her eyes in chagrin.
He chuckled and grinned at her. "I did hear correctly, right?"
Small blush stole over her cheeks. "Yup."
Bigger grin, and stood up a bit straighter. "Thought so."
Hit him in the chest. "Shut up. It takes two, ya know."
Grin changed to a smile. "I noticed, luv. Believe me."
She tried to quell the smile. Unsuccessfully.
Gave her a playful shove. "Ah! See? It's not just me. You're a right bit proud of yourself, too. And rightly so." Cocked an eyebrow and grinned.
Rolled her eyes. "Please shut up."
He chuckled, then made a show of the 'zipping lips' gesture, and held the imaginary key out to her.
She gave a small, tense smile and reached for the doorknob.
He gave a sigh, and moved to stand behind her. There was music on the other side of the door, and it was time to face it.
From the booth, Xander studiously avoided looking at Spike. He didn't exist in the boy's world. He did cast a few betrayed looks in the Slayer's direction, but remained silent.
Buffy winced because the looks hurt her, even the appealing glances she sent his way did nothing to soften his glare.
Spike put a reassuring hand on her shoulder for an instant. Just an instant. Then moved to look around at the others. Xander... well, nothing had changed. Giles was driving. Moved his look to the Wiccas.
Tara gave him an encouraging nod and shy smile. Willow just smiled at him for a moment, then turned back to Tara.
He offered them a quick grin, and moved to sit on the edge of the booth. The very edge. Too close for Xander. Xander got up and went to sit in the passenger's seat. Spike just watched him, making a quiet, frustrated noise in his throat.
Buffy sent him her 'what are we gonna do' face, while Dawn moved up into the booth with him.
He kind of shrugged at Buffy, then gave Dawn a grin. "Hey, Bit."
"Hey, Spike." Handed him a package of crackers sympathetically.
He chuckled, and opened the package, putting on in his mouth and chewing slowly. Held the package out to Dawn.
She took one, chewed. After swallowing, said clearly, but not fakely, "Congrats."
Cocked head from the vampire.
"With Buffy. I hope things go well." Her allegiance pledged.
He gave her a grin. That was his Brave Little Toaster. "Thanks, Platelet. So do I."
She nodded.
==========================================- ==============================================
It felt odd to be in a hotel after only one night in the Ohana. But Giles had been right. They needed some apart time. Spike lay sprawled across his bed, bored. Then perked up when he rolled over on his cell phone. Dialed quickly.
Giggled, "Hello?"
"Madison? You busy?"
Muffled noise from her end. "I'll catch up," she called. Came back to the phone. "Never too busy for you."
It made him feel good to hear her sound happy. "What'd I interrupt?"
"Just went out with a friend."
"Oh?" Tried to keep the growl out of his voice. "Girl friend, or are we talking a male of the species?"
Small smile. "Male of the species. But he's not... anything. He's just... Trevor."
Snort.
"Puppy. I swear."
Quiet whimper. "I'm just bein' a guard Puppy, pet. You know me."
Warm smile that he could feel through the phone. "I know. And know that Madison is being Guard Madison. No boys. For a long time. Only friends."
"Well... okay." Got excited. "Guess what."
"Hmm?"
"Phase 2 complete as of last night." He was purring.
"Oh, Puppy! Really??"
Laughed. "Would I joke about this?! And! The Scoobies know. And you were right about something else. Buffy learned scritching."
Dry applauding. "Well. SHE gets a cookie for picking up on THAT one..."
"Aww. Come on, pet! She's tryin'."
"Yeah yeah. Trying. Two points for Buffy."
"Well, she promised stuff, too. Everything you suggested. And one more."
Huge grin. "What else?"
Sounded happy, excited, maybe even a little awed. "That she wouldn't let things drive her into the ground before she'd let me help. That she'd let me in. Let me love her." Sighed. "And even better. She cares, Madison. Really cares about me."
"Of course she does, Puppy."
"Yeah. But she *said* it this time."
Quiet 'aww' noise. "Good. You deserve that."
He sighed, and she could practically see him cuddle down against the pillows happily. "She made me promise never to stake myself. Even after all of 'em are long gone and I'm alone. Made me swear. Said that she and the other's wouldn't be able to rest in peace knowin' that I was in hell. Guess I'm doomed to live forever."
Small smile. "Guess so. Gonna come visit me when I'm old?"
"Of course. By then they'll probably have invented SPF 5,000,000 sunblock for vamps. We'll go for walks in a park or something." Strained slightly. Didn't like thinking of when they'd be gone. Even Madison couldn't live forever. He hugged his stuffed cat.
"Puppy?"
Snapped out of it. "Huh? What?"
"Loving us while we're here makes us live forever in you."
Oh God.. He hoped she hadn't heard that sniffle. Cleared his throat. "Uh.. Yeah. Thanks, pet."
She slouched against the brick of a building. "I was just trying to cheer you up. Don't cry."
Defensive. "M'not cryin'. Allergies."
Indignant snap. "Don't you ever lie to me."
Whimper, cause Puppies do that. "Sorry. I just... I haven't lost anyone in awhile, you know? 'Cept for Joyce, and that was kind of belated. And I have the others. I just.. I don't know what I'm gonna do when I'm the last Scooby." And when he'd started thinking of himself *as* a Scooby, he didn't even know.
"Maybe you could help the next Slayer."
Glumly. "Wouldn't be the same." Slightly accusatory tone. "When I called you, I was in a *good* mood." Joking undertone, though.
Grinned. "You brought it up." Excited tone. "Guess what?"
"What?"
"My hair is officially back to normal." Tugged on one end. Smiled at it.
"That's great, pet!" Added under his breath. "Now I can stop worrying all the bloody time."
Laughed. "Don't worry about me. Geez. I have Will hovering. Still. I'm fine." A little more sincerely. "Fine."
He sighed. "Good. I guess I'd better let you get back to your friend. We can talk later, though, right? Maybe you call when you get home?"
"Ok. It'll be a while. He's mad because I haven't eaten yet today, so we have to stop." Rolled her eyes.
He chuckled. "Alright. Talk to you later, pet."
"I love you, Puppy."
"I love you too, Madison." They hung up. Spike sighed. Bored again. Hmm. Maybe his 'girlfriend' - Grinned at that word- would want to do something. Time to find the Slayer.
It was easier than he thought. Buffy was kicking a vending machine in the hallway.
Decided to surprise her. "Need help saving the world from evil vending machines, Slayer? What'd it do, take your money?"
She jumped slightly. Gave the machine a glare. "It won't give me my Cheetoh's."
He walked up to the offending machine, gave it a good looking over, cocked his head at it, then slammed his palm against the junction between the glass and metal, halfway down the machine. Two bags of Cheetoh's, three packages of powdered donuts, and one package of Oreo's fell into the retrieval bin. Not to mention that Buffy's money made a return appearance as well. And it brought about five bucks worth of friends with it. Spike grinned. "Helps to know someone with a magic touch, doesn't it, luv?"
Rolled her eyes with a smile. "Yay! Loot. I don't feel like sharing. Your room."
He grinned again, and helped her gather up the treats and cash, taking it back to his room with her right behind him. Deposited the stuff on the bed.
Collapsed on the bed beside the stuff, opened one of the Cheetoh bags. Buffy crunched a couple of her Cheetoh's. "I was thinking. Maybe I should talk to Xander... apologize for being so mean about everything."
Spike swallowed the powdered donut that he'd been chewing. "No. You shouldn't."
Pursed her lips at him. "Why not?"
"Cause he doesn't deserve it, that's why." Slight growl in the tone.
Slightly surprised, almost upset, "Spike! Why?"
Growl. "Cause of the way he looked at you today, that's why! Did you even notice?!" Snarl. "If that Harris wanker ever, and I mean *ever* looks at you the way he did today again, like he's bleedin' disgusted with you... I'll personally tear his head of, throw it out the window, and use his intestines for a jumprope."
She sat up to level a disgustedly angry glare at him. Enunciated clearly, "Over my broken, bleeding body you will."
A flash of her body, after the demon had thrown her, went through his mind. Her.. crumpled on the ground, bleeding, dying. His eyes got huge, he growled and grabbed her by the shoulders, shaking her slightly. "Don't you EVER say anything like that again! Never! Do you hear me!? Don't even think it!"
She pulled away quickly, confusedly. "Spike, *what* is your problem?"
He looked at her, blue eyes wide and a little watery. "You.. in the alley. Broken. Bleeding. Dying." Growled to hide a sniff. Said forcefully, "YOU didn't see how pale you were. YOU didn't have to sit there and watch helplessly as the person you loved slipped away from you. You weren't covered in the blood of a person you care about. You weren't watching you, Slayer. I was. And I've never felt so helpless, or alone in my life. Never." By the end of his speech, he'd turned his back to her and was trying to compose himself.
She bit her lip, and moved behind him, stroking his back. "I'm sorry."
He muttered quietly, "Not your fault. Just... I don't want to.. Don't want you to.. Not after all we've been through.." He was trembling a little with the force it took to ward off the tears that were threatening him.
She slowly turned him to her, wrapped her arms around him. She'd never seen this side of him. So many facets to this enigma of a man. This one was letting her see maybe why Madison called him 'Puppy'. "I'm here now. I'm ok."
He leaned into her, resting his head on her shoulder. Snuffled. "I know.. Sorry. Bloody hell.." Didn't pull away, though.
Her hands moved over his back, played in his hair, stroked down his arms.
He sniffled a little more, and put his arms around her. "You're good at this, luv." Purred softly.
Nuzzled at his neck. "Thank you."