AN: Tequila here. Y'all thought that was the end? *smirks* Ha. We've archived up to 31, and we're not done yet. Stay with us. We love you guys and your reviews. *blows kisses* Oh, and I'm out of town for the weekend, so... This will be the last update till Sunday. Ya know what? I lied. lol I just went over 26, and I'm gonna put THAT one up, too, when I get home from school. I hope that'll tide y'all over till Sunday or so. Have a good weekend!!! *blows more kisses*

Always. Tequila Sunrise



A week later, Buffy bounced in the front door, completely forgetting that she was supposed to have gotten lunch for the small crowd at her home about... oh... three hours ago. There was a huge smile on her face, as he went into the kitchen, where Willow, Tara, and scowling Spike stood.

She walked up to her boyfriend, still smiling widely, and pressed her lips to his frowning ones. "I did it!!!" She broke away to spin in a little circle.

He cocked his head. Apparently, he wasn't projecting 'annoyance', as much as he thought he was. Sighed. She looked happy. "What'd you do, luv?"

She turned to them, a truly happy giggle, the first in a VERY long time, and spread her arms wide. "I got a job!"

Willow and Tara made surprised happy noises, with a chorus of, "Wow!" "That's great, Buffy!" "Neat! Where??"

She wasn't supposed to get a job. They'd talked about this, and he thought that the matter had been closed. A half growl. Oh, well. She was in a good mood, and he couldn't very well yell at her in front of the Wiccas, now could he? "Good for you."

She nodded to him and chattered with Willow and Tara, now leaning against the center island in a little pow-wow. "I went out to get lunch, which I totally forgot you guys. I'm sorry. But! So, I'm going, and I see this sign at that department store on McKinley. Ya know, the one just like Sears?"

Spike went to the fridge and started rooting around. Nothing, nothing. Settled on a slice of cheese, then turned back to the women, listening.

Willow made a little squealing sound. "Oh boy! Have you seen their shoe department? Do you get a discount?!"

Buffy nodded excitedly. "But. Not till the bills get paid. I mean... But, I walked in, because they had a 'help wanted' sign, and... I asked the lady about it, and she said she thought I was a good girl, and smart and pretty, and I can start next Monday!!!" She still couldn't believe her luck. She smiled at Spike again, and stole a little piece of his cheese, popping it into her mouth. "Go. Me."

Tara smiled. "Wow. That is so great, Buffy."

Spike gave a slight nod, and absently broke his cheese in half, giving the half that Buffy'd taken part of to his girlfriend, and taking a bite of the rest.

She half grinned at her piece of cheese. Then: resolve face. "I'm gonna do really good at this. I've gotta keep it."

Spike cleared his throat. Looked to Willow and Tara. "I bet Buffy's too tired to go and get you all any food now. Why don't you two go, have a nice romantic lunch, and we'll stay here." Hoped that the Wiccas didn't quite get the real reason he wanted them gone.

Willow's eyes got wide, then she smiled slyly. "Post job-gettin' smoochy makin'. We get it. We're skah-daddling." Took her lover's hand.

Spike started to say something, then shook his head and chuckled slightly. "You are too insightful, sometimes, Red." Half shooed the two women to the door, staying far enough back to avoid the sunlight that came in when they opened it, then moved to lock it after they'd left.

She gave Spike a provocative smile. "Oooh... back to locking doors are we?"

He looked at her. "I thought you weren't going to apply for a job."

Tilted her head. Whoa. So not with the sexy voice. More like the, "I'm trying not to sound like I'm seething, but I really am" voice.

"Since when?"

"Since we talked about this last week, Buffy. I told you that I can get you money. I've already taken care of gettin' most of the house fixed back up. And some of it's better than it was before Hurricane Hell Bitch blew through, if I do say so myself."

She nodded, not seeing the problem. "Yeah. We talked about it. You said you didn't want me to. But, this is really of the good. We never agreed on anything."

He shook his head and walked into the living room, pacing in front of the new coffee table. "Yes we did! You said, and I quote, 'There's just too much for one person here. I need your help.' "

Followed him. "Yes, I did. About the house. We never AGREED on anything. You told me you didn't want me to get a job, and you assumed it was a closed issue."

"Because it was!"

Incredulous look. "Because you said so????"

Paused to look at her. "I didn't hear you arguing."

"Because there was nothing to argue about. I walked away after I said that I still wanted to get one, anyway."

"Wanted and actually going out looking are two different things! I thought you'd at least consult me before you accepted anything!" Sat on the couch, rubbing the bridge of his nose. When had they turned into an old married couple?

"Spike! I walked in, and they interviewed me for half an hour. Then they HANDED it to me! What was I supposed to say?"

Looked up at her. "How about, 'I have to talk this over with my family before I agree to anything'?"

"You *saw* how the majority of my family reacted. That's how Dawn will, too, by the way. They know I need a job, and I need the money. And I did NOT go looking. It... jumped out at me."

Spike was still agitated. "I don't like it. I can handle everything. If you get this job, it'll be like you don't need me anymore."

His bottom lip was doing that 'almost- sticky outty' thing. Had that little frown line between his eyebrows. It dissolved some of tension in her back, and stance. Too cute, her lover. Heaved a sigh. Sat next to him. "I never needed you for money."

"But I want to help." Again with the 'almost pout'.

She smoothed her thumb over his bottom lip. "You are. I need your help with the house." Wow. She still wasn't used to how hard that was to say.

He was mad at her. He was mad at her. It was a chant, and... Damn it when he leaned toward her for no good reason. Break a perfectly good chant, too. He glanced at her. "You do?"

Nodded. "Yeah. I couldn't have done this by myself." Still, another hard admission to make.

A half grin. Okay. This would do for now. Later, would be the time to really sort this out. Now... Now was the time to concentrate on her touch. Cause he liked that. "Okay." One of her hands was on his back, and he pushed against it a little.

She smiled, let her hand knead gently at the small of his back, used her other one to turn his face to her. "We're ok?" She was taking the job.

He nodded. "Yeah." Purred softly. Then, quietly. "Congratulations, luv."

Kissed him softly, for just a moment. "Thank you."

Well. That wouldn't do. He pulled her to him, and pressed his mouth to hers. A wordless 'you're welcome'. Purring became deeper.

So did the kiss. Buffy felt a triumph surge through her. He had agreed. And she was proud of her job. She re-focused on his mouth.

Couch. That wasn't where he wanted to be. Still kissing her, he stood slowly, giving them both time to adjust to the different positions, then he lifted her into his arms and headed for the stairs, mouth still firmly molded to hers.

She shrugged mentally. What the hell? She'd never been carried. She wrapped her arms around his neck, shifted her focus from his mouth to his neck, sniffling, biting, and licking.

And nearly causing her boyfriend's knees to give out. Ooh. Destination. No. Wrong door. There. Bedroom = bed. Plopped her down on it, growling softly as he followed her.

She smiled ferally, and fisted a hand in the neckline of his shirt, pulling him down to her, semi-playfully.

He growled happily, maneuvering himself onto the bed......

========================================================================== =====

Buffy opened her eyes, a groggy smile on her face. Looked at the clock. 7:30????

Next to her, with one arm around her, Spike purred softly, and moved closer, one leg making it's way over hers.

Mmm... ooh... Yes... No.... Why not? Dawn! Dawn was home! Or... would be. Shit. She scrambled off the bed, grabbing at clothes. "Wake up, Spike!"

He jerked awake. Literally, for her quick movements had almost pulled the slumbering vampire off the bed. "Wha...?"

She was wobbling around, trying to pull on pants. "Dawn is gonna be home, any minute!" She whispered fiercely.

He sat up, rubbing at his eyes. "Oh." Shook his head and swung his legs over the edge of the bed, the sheet strategically positioned. Stretched a little. Pulled his jeans on slowly, watching her.

She snapped a bra in place, looking frantically for her tee-shirt as the front door slammed closed.

"Buffy?? Spike??"

Whimpered.

Ah! Spike tossed her shirt, which had somehow gotten tangled in the sheets. Then he set about looking for his shirt.

She was holding his, looking at it confusedly. Handed it to him, yanked on her own.

He chuckled softly. He should've let her put on his shirt. That would've been funny. And probably would've gotten him locked out of the bedroom for a week. Not worth it. Slipped his shirt on as Buffy escaped out the bedroom door.

She descended the stairs, smiling brightly at Dawn. "Hey, Dawnie!"

Her sister smiled. "Hey, Buff."

"Summer class?"

"Boring. But the mall after was fun."

Buffy grinned. "Good. Guess what?? You'll never guess?"

Dawn rolled her eyes. "What?"

"I got a job!!" She beamed at her baby sister.

Dawn gasped and let out a delighted giggle. "That's so great, Buffy!!!!" She embraced her, looked up the staircase at Spike. "Hey! Did you hear?? Isn't it great?"

Spike came down the stairs, smoothing a couple of wrinkles out of his shirt. "Yeah. Bloody wonderful." Moved past the sisters and into the kitchen. Directly to the fridge. Had a sudden craving for orange juice. Something about Buffy did that to him. They'd be together, and he'd wake up craving orange juice. Had no clue where that'd come from.

The sister's looked at eachother apprehensively, but Buffy soothed Dawn. "He's just kidding. He was really excited a few hours ago." Gave him a meaningful glance. As in, if he wanted to be excited ever again with her in the next week or so, he'd better stop.

Yikes. He got the hint. Stood up with the carton of orange juice, thought for a moment, then moved to get a glass. Dawn'd hit him a couple of days earlier for drinking out of the carton. Something about 'undead cooties'. "Yeah, Bit. Kidding."

She relaxed a little and nodded. "Oh. Good. Cuz the mean looks and fighting? Gives me tummy rumblins."

Buffy gave a tight smile and started rooting through the cupboards. "Um... what do you want for dinner?"

Spike poured his juice, and put the carton back. Searched the fridge again. "Luv, remember? You were going shopping this afternoon. 'Till you got sidetracked. We've got half a gallon of milk, a left over zip-lock bag of Red's meatloaf, and half a head of lettuce." Closed the fridge. "It's a lost cause."

Dawn picked up the phone. "It's never a lost cause, cuz Domino's delivers!"

Spike chuckled. "Good. Otherwise we'd wind up with either old Italian food, or a *very* simple salad."

Dawn cringed while she placed the order, then hung up the phone. "Eugh to both."

Halfway through the pizza, the phone rang.

Spike looked up from his box of hotwings that he'd ordered separately. The look said, 'I'm not answering the phone, because you'll just yell at me for getting grease on it.'

Dawn rolled her eyes and picked up the phone. "Hello?" Paused. "Oh my God! How are you?? NO... it has been... a totally lonely summer. You don't even understand." Laughed and giggled in a language Spike could not understand, commonly called 'teenager phone babble'. Took a break to cover the phone to ask, "Can I go to Janice's?"

Spike growled quietly. He most definitely did *not* like that girl. "No."

At the same time: "All right," Buffy told her. "In by midnight. Behave."

They looked at each other.

"Luv, it's late. She shouldn't-"

She turned her 'please? I'm so sad' eyes on him. The same time Dawn turned on the mega-watt doe eyes. "Spike... she's been gone all summer, and she'll be in by midnight."

He looked back and forth from one Summers to the other. Both were giving him looks that could make a crocodile feel guilty, and were currently trained on him. Damn it. Ground out, grudgingly. "Fine. But if you aren't back by midni-"

High-pitched squeal, and a lightning quick hug before she returned to the phone. "Right. Oooh! Black top, red pants. Definitely. Me, too. I'll be over!!! BYE!" Slammed the phone down, and picked up her half- eaten slice to scurry upstairs to get ready. "THANKS!" she yelled from her room.

Spike turned his head in the direction that the Dawn-blur had gone, and then shook his head, muttering about 'Teenagers'.

Buffy smiled. "Thank you. She'll be good."

He sighed. "I know *she'll* be good. It's that Janice person I'm worried about. She's not exactly a good influence, you know."

"I know. But she can handle herself for a little under four hours."

Another sigh, and a ferally bitten hotwing. As if he had to kill it first. Half growl.

She smiled and started to say something but a red and black clad Dawn in heels came in to buss their cheeks. "Bye guys."

Spike chuckled quietly, slightly out of embarrassment as Dawn disappeared through the door. Wiped at his cheek with an ungreasy hand. Even though he knew it was pointless, he still called, "Midnight!", after the teen.

"Mmm-hhmmm..." As the door slammed behind her.

Buffy laughed, and swallowed a bite of pizza. "Janice's brother is visiting from college."

Growl, bite of hotwing. "Boy better behave himself. If I smell anything wrong, I'll kill 'im." Eyes grew wide. "Oh shit."

"What??"

He shook his head. "I just sounded like Angelus." Shivered. "I SWORE to myself I'd never do that. It's like.. turnin' into your parents, or somethin'."

She laughed. Loud and hard.

He growled, and chucked a napkin at her.

Rolled her eyes, and started picking up after 'dinner'. When she was done, Buffy flopped down on the couch, grabbing the remote to see what was on TV.

Spike sat next to her, after he'd washed the hotwing grease off his hands. Decided to broach the subject. They were alone, after all. And it was later. Now was the time to talk. "Buffy. I still don't think that you should be taking this job without thinking about it."

She made a half-listening noise. She didn't wanna talk about it. "Mm. I did think about it. Shh... Crossing Jordan."

He snorted, and reached for the remote, intending to switch off the TV. Talk now. Telly later.

She pulled it back. TV now. Discussion never. "Spike. I like this show."

He sighed and settled back on the couch. "Fine. We talk when it's over."

She gave a mental sigh. Pitbull, much? Why couldn't he let it go? She had made her mind up. That simple. And he insisted on dragging it through the dirt. "Right."

Slightly placated, though he had the feeling that he'd have to bring it up *again*, since she seemed to be in the mood to ignore this particular subject. Put his feet on the new, cheap coffee table and leaned into the couch cushions.

She decided to try to make him as happy as possible because she just didn't want to deal with a sulky petulant vampire. And if he was happy, his mind was off 'The Job', as she had taken to calling the issue. Laced her fingers in his. Leaned her head against his shoulder.

That was a bit of a surprise. A pleasant one. Had to remind himself that he was still supposed to be annoyed with her. Had to, or he'd start purring.

Her other hand crossed over to stroke absently at the hand holding hers. Smiled. "I like Nigel on here." Inclined her head to the tv.

Don't purr. Don't purr. "Never really paid much attention to this show, myself."

"It's about a nosy, stubborn girl with commitment problems, and a lot of mysteries to figure out about her past. She fights crime, as a medical examiner."

He chuckled. "Sounds a bit familiar, luv. Don't you think?"

Cocked her head at him. "No..." This from the girl who thought the Buffy-Bot looked nothing like her.

"Whatever you say, Slayer." Snorted. "The only difference is your occupations. And both of you deal with corpses on a regular basis, so that's not even that different."

Butted her head into his shoulder. "Be quiet." All too soon for Buffy, the show ended.

Not soon enough for the vampire. "So. About the job."

As the words left his mouth, her lips brushed against his. Her hands moved to his shoulders, stroking gently, then began to knead at them. "It'll still be later later."

Ooh. No. Focus, Spike. "It's later, now, Buffy." Began his internal chant of 'don't purr, don't purr' again.

Her hands slipped past his shoulders to stroke firmly at his back. Pushed her nose into his neck, planting little kisses. "Still..."

Oh, god. Against his mind's will, his body responded, pressing into her hands. He was still managing to not purr, though. "Buffy.."

Scraped her teeth down his throat, her fingers kneading lazily. "Mmm..?"

Eyes closed. She was right... later. Half laid down across the couch to give her better access. Purred softly.

She stroked her hands under his shirt, massaging him. Playfully, "Last time you fell asleep on me..."

Half chuckle. "No chance of that now, luv. I had a nap earlier, remember? You were there." Pressed into her hands.

Slow smile, ran the tips of her fingers from his shoulders to the small of his back firmly. "I remember."

He sighed, and moved closer to her, almost laying his head in her lap.

Mental relieved sigh. Totally off 'the subject'. Good. Kept rubbing at his back.

Now he did lay his head in her lap. Moved so that one of her hands was on his side. Looked up at her with half hooded eyes. Purred a little louder.

Her fingers spread, rubbing firmly at the muscle between his ribs.

A happy sigh. Smiled at her. "You're good at this, luv." Arched his side into her hand.

Small smile. "Thank you." Her other hand left his back, scratched at the back of his head a little bit.

Eyes closed and he leaned his head into her hand. "I'm gonna owe you later, aren't I?"

"Mmm..." Another playful smile. "Probably."

He chuckled a little. Rolled a bit further onto his back, opened one eye and smiled at her. "And why the sudden urge to turn me into a lapdog, luv?"

Shrugged. "Not allowed to just feel like it?"

"I guess so. What can I do to make you 'feel like it' more often?"

Gave a little laugh. "Wow, you worded that wrong."

He blinked. Shook his head a little. "I sure did." Raised an eyebrow. "Or did I?"

Another slow sexy smile. "Mmm... Dunno. Did you?"

He chuckled. "You decide. I don't think clearly when you do this."

Another laugh. "I know."

Could she be deliberately trying to distract- Oops. Train of thought derailed the moment the hand that had been rubbing his ribs moved more onto his stomach. Deep sigh.

Took in a tiny breath. He had that 'deep thought' look on his face. Bad look. No deep thought. Just happy thoughts. Trailed her fingers over his stomach, tracing the lines of his abs.

Ooh. That's good. He liked that. Eyes closed again.

She smoothed her fingers over the skin firmly, then swirled them gently here and there.

Okay. Focus, Spike. Could she possibly be trying to distract you from thinking- Nope. There it went again.

She leaned down, kissed him, her hand never stopping it's movement.

His eyes had been closed, so the kiss had been a pleasant surprise. He returned it without thinking.

Her tongue teased the seam of his lips, her fingers rubbed at his ribs again.

Beneath hers, his mouth opened, as he arched into her hand again. Try again. There was a thought. He had a thought. He was sure of that.

Her other hand inched toward his hair, sliding along his torso.

Thought? What thought? Only sensations. Purred louder, deeper.

She leaned back as he sat up slowly, still kissing her. The barest smile curved her lips. Good work. And pleasant, too.

One of his hands, the one that wasn't helping to support him in his half reclined position, made it's way to the back of her neck, pulling her closer as he pressed his mouth to hers again.

Mmm. Her hand slid under his shirt again, sliding along the skin, the muscle she found there always enticing. She gave a tiny moan against his lips.

Continued to purr, as his mouth began finding it's way down her throat. Okay. There was a thought. About.. job. About the job. He was supposed to talk to her about-

Gasping sigh, arched against him.

Almost a distraction. And he was really beginning to think that she was doing this on purpose. Trying to make him forget about- Hello! Where did that hand come from?

Her hand was stroking centimeters below his belt, and she dipped her head to connect her lips to his.

No way he could miss that. Mmm. Was suddenly very seriously considering having 'later' be tomorrow. Like, many hours later. Many, *many* hours later. Especially if she kept doing that.

And she did. A little rough, a little desperate, "Spike.."

He pulled back, panting slightly. "Buffy... I-"

Kissed him again, mumbled against his mouth, "More..." Wasn't even really thinking about distracting him anymore. Just wanted him.

Now, who was he to refuse a lady's 'request'? Of course, from Buffy, it was more like an order. Not that he minded, really. But still... There was that *thing*. The *thing* that kept bumping against the back of his mind. Job thing.

He was hesitating, and it wasn't working for her. Kissed him again. "Spike..." Pulled his attention back to her.

'Later' could be later. With a growl of pure love and want, he kissed her again, and stood up pulling her with him. Moving for the stairs.

They finally made it there, with some stops, thumping against the wall, sloppy kissing and walking that never went well together, but was so very good.

Several hours later, they lay together in the Slayer's bed, for the second time in less than twelve hours. Satisfied, and sleepy. Very, very sleepy. Spike wanted to talk, though. Just wasn't sure if he could, yet. Dawn still wouldn't be home for another two hours. So there was still time to talk. "Luv?"

Sated, low, sexy, "Hmmm?"

"About the job-"

Irritated sigh.

"Buffy, you said we could talk about this."

Sat up, holding the sheet to her chest. "And you just thought post-sex cuddling would be the perfect time?"

He sat up next to her, pulling her back up against him. "I was trying to talk about it earlier, but someone kept distracting me." Let a slight playful tone slip into his voice, so that she knew that it hadn't really *bothered* him, but that he'd been on to her.

She had the grace to blush slightly. "Only at the beginning."

He chuckled quietly. "I know. So. Is now 'later'?"

She unconsciously stiffened in his arms. "Yeah."

"I know I can't tell you not to do anything. It's not my place. I just want you to know that I don't like this. And that you do have another choice."

She moved out of his arms to sit across from him, still holding the sheet against herself. "Why not?"

"Because you've already got so much to do. With Niblet to take care of, and the house. Not to mention slaying, and the Whelp's upcoming wedding."

Sighed. "Spike. Other people do that too. It's called multi-tasking. And what is my other option? Say welfare, and I'm staking you."

"Me."

Looked at him warily, confusedly.

He sighed. "I can get money. I can handle stuff." Swung his legs over the side of the bed so that he wouldn't have to hold himself up on his arms anymore. "I can handle that stuff, so that it's not all on you. You save the bloody world! That should be enough." Snorted. "Far as I'm concerned, the Wanker's Counsel should be payin' you."

Shrugged, and started to pull on clothes. "Maybe, but they're not going to. Spike, I don't want your money."

Tugged on his jeans, for the second time that day. "But I want to give it to you. I want to help."

"You are helping." Pulled on a shirt. "You're helping with the house."

He slipped his shirt on and ignored the buttons for the moment. "But I want to do more. I'm bloody living here. I should pull my own weight."

"You are!!! You cook, and clean, and help with Dawn."

Stood, after putting on his socks and boots. "I mean more than that." Followed her out into the hall and toward the stairs. As they went down, he said, without thinking that he hadn't told her. "It's not like I have anywhere else to go. After the Hell Bitch totalled my crypt-"

Slowly. "What?"

Oops. Dismissive shrug. "Got back to the crypt, and it wasn't there."

"What do you MEAN, 'it wasn't there'??"

Another shrug. "Just a hole in the ground. All my stuff's gone. Hell Bitch must've gone lookin' for me."

Anger, betrayal. One step back. "And what?? You didn't see fit to TELL me??"

"Didn't seem important." Looked around the still not quite back to normal living room. "Besides, you needed me."

"I don't give a damn. Let YOU in??" Cool glare. "Seems to me it's a two way street."

Cocks his head. "Slayer, this is totally different. I don't *care* about that stupid crypt. Stuff, I can replace. It's *you* that matters. You and Bit. Your welfare is so much more important to me than some old crap." Voice went up a notch.

"Well, I kinda think if you've been hanging on to said CRAP for over a hundred years, it MIGHT be important." Her voice raised as well. "I cannot BELIEVE you didn't tell me!"

"I CAME here to tell you!" Visibly calmed himself. "But you were upset. I wanted to help you, first. It's all about priorities, Slayer. What's more important, a couple of chairs and some old notebooks, or the person you love?"

She was still seething. "Fine. I accept that. That was a WEEK ago. You couldn't have found time for that before now?"

"I've been trying to help you, Bit, and the Wiccas pick up the pieces, luv. That was more important to me." Shrug. "Besides, I'm stayin' in the basement for now, so it's not a big, immediate problem."

"Right. Like... income isn't a big, immediate problem? And the things that go with that? Groceries, clothes, utilities?"

"Buffy, I've told you. Money isn't a problem for me. I can get money."

"So. Can. I. And what am I supposed to tell Social Services? I'm taking aid from a vampire, I SWEAR. No. And I need to be able to take care of her. And I will not. Now or ever. Take your money."

Snort. "Like I need money, Slayer? What am I gonna buy? Groceries? I don't have to eat. Clothes? I'm fine with what I have. And who gives a crap about Social Services, anyway! Dawn's your sister! Your family! Who cares how you're getting money, as long as she's taken care of and you don't get arrested."

"THEY care, Spike! They want pay stubs, and proof of reliable employment, a SAFE home. What am I supposed to DO anyway? Sit in the house and twiddle my thumbs while you get money, God only knows how, and be the Slayer at night? Is that it?"

He quieted a bit, and looked around the living room again. Sighed. "I don't know, luv. I just don't know. I want to help. But you don't want me to." Moved toward the door. "If you need me, I'll be out crypt hunting."

Grabbed his arm. "You're staying here. I need you to help me with Dawn, and the house. I'm giving you that. Isn't that enough??" Small frown, as though just figuring something out. "It'll never be enough, will it, Spike? My best has never been enough."

Turned to her, shoulders half slumped. "It's enough, Buffy. It is. But it's not your best. Your best is what you give to Rupert, and Harris, and the rest of your little family. I don't expect to ever be a part of that. And I don't really want to. I will help. Be here when you need me. When you want me. I can't leave you, Buffy. You have my undead heart in your hands. I know you try. I know you're dealing with more than any Slayer before you. Any girl your age, for that matter. And you're doing it amazingly. The way you work, help others, save the whole bloody world. I'm not surprised that there's not enough room left for me. That guide of yours had it wrong, Buffy. Death isn't your gift. Love is. And it's a gift that I will never deserve." His voice had gotten progressively quieter as he went on. Went out onto the porch. Paused, looking up at the stars.

She moved to stand behind him, arms wrapped around herself. "Love is not my gift. I'm awful at it. And it is hard. And I think you're pushing me. And I won't accept your charity because mom never would have. She'd never have needed it in the first place. And you're right. It's not my best. I guess... giving my best has always given another person too much power. And... You don't deserve my love. No one does. It's kind of poisonous, don't you think?"

Quietly. "No. It's wonderful, and amazing. Like sunlight, when you haven't seen it in a century. And, like sunlight, it reveals the good things, even when they've been hidden in shadow for so long. So long that everyone's forgotten about them."

"It sucks everyone in. Puts them in danger, hurts them, brings them pain, until they welcome death, which I inevitably bring."

He growled and turned to her, his eyes flashing for an instant before returning to normal. "You're wrong, Buffy. But I understand how you might think such a thing."

Looked at him in sad sympathy. "How could I not?" Shook her head. "This wasn't the point. I need to work, Spike. I need the money. I need the job. I need the benefits."

He shook his head. "I still say I can get you whatever you need. Whatever you want. You don't need to be doin' other people's dirty work just to get by! There's got to be another way."

"Rob a bank? Spike. People all over the world work. Everyday. Nine to five."

"That doesn't mean *you* have to! You save the bloody world! What else can it possibly want from you!?"

Exasperated laugh. "Death and taxes. They've already got one... Money, Spike. They want it. I need it. I mean.... In two weeks, I will officially be below the poverty line."

"Not if you'd let me help."

"Not if I take the job, either." Frustrated noise in her throat. "Why can't you see why I won't take charity??"

"I see it, Slayer. I just don't accept it. And it's not charity! I'm trying to provide for the peop- Person I love! Why can't you see that?!"

"If we were MARRIED, I could see that! I would be doing something to hold up my end. But, there's nothing. Just... sit back, and let you take care of me. I *can't* do that!"

Frustrated. "Why the bloody hell not!?"

"It's not who I AM!!! It's so passive, and needy! Two things I CANNOT afford to EVER be!"

Growled. "Fine, Slayer." Spat it out. "Be all high and mighty. Keep me beneath you where I belong. Don't let me help. Someday, when you really need me, I may not be there, because I don't think you'll want me. So just be this way. Don't bother changing. Don't notice when people change who they *are* for you, and for God's sake, don't ever bother to try and change yourself for someone else." Growled again and stalked off the porch. "I'm gonna find another place to live. Take the bloody job, if that's what you want to do. Go ahead. I'm not stopping you. I can't do this anymore."

She followed after him, swung him around. "Don't you DARE talk to me like that! Like I'm some stupid PEASANT who just doesn't get it. I see. I appreciate what you've done! But it's YOU who doesn't even notice!!!!! I CRIED to you! I've let you hold me! Reassure me. YOU don't know what that means at all! It's automatic for you. Ingrained and easy. Well guess what, Spike? I've had men walk out on me since I was six years old. So excuse the HELL out of me, if it's hard. So you BE that way, go and sulk that I can't fall at your feet and be like Druscilla and Harmony and let a man take care of me. But I will be DAMNED if you are moving out."

Turned, growled at her. "What do you propose we do, Slayer? What's your perfect plan this time, huh?" her hands in the air. "I don't KNOW! I just don't see where the big is. Ya know what? You can't do this anymore? Neither can I."

Froze for a moment. "So. That's it, then. Swan song. We're through?"

Oh, sweet God, that one hurt. Stiffly, "If that's what you want."

"It's not." Turned to look at her. "You know what I want. But you can't give it. And I don't know what to do." Venom gone from his voice. Sounding.. defeated, confused and hurting.

Plaintively. "It's not my fault. It's just... I'm trying." Closed her eyes, turned away from him. Mumbled, "... never enough..." Then, "What? What do we do?"

He sighed, and moved behind her. Wanting to touch her, but knowing it wouldn't be appreciated at this moment. "I don't know, luv. I just don't know."

Small voice. "But you're not leaving?"

Shook his head. "No. I'll never leave, Buffy. I can't. It's just.. not in me to do."

Nodded. "But we can't do this."

"Not for awhile." Paused. Thought for a moment. "What about a.. break? Not a break-up. Just.. let's hit the pause button for awhile. A couple of weeks. Sort this stuff out. Get things back to as normal as they ever are around here."

Still hadn't turned around. "Like... what do you mean?"

Shrugged. "I don't know. No dates. No kissing. No sex. Just.. time. Time to talk, to work things out. To fix things, without the relationship to confuse them further."

Definite pissers on the last two 'no's. But... it sounded... less crazy. "A break."

"Yeah." Licked his lips. "Agreed, then?"

She nodded. "Yeah... Wait."

"What?"

Turned to look at him. "No break yet, yeah?"

Cocked his head. "When do you want it to start?"

"In two minutes. I'm still mad at you." Stood on her toes, kissed him.

He leaned into it, knowing full well that this would be the last of it's kind for who knew how long.

Before she knew it, her hands were buried in his hair, her mouth open under his, hungry for the touch of his hands.

He let his hands wander her torso, letting her tongue lead the dance in their joined mouths. A soft moan escaped the vampire, followed by a low purr.

Her body responded to the purr, moving closer, her hands trailing over his back, tracing the line of his abs.

He sighed, not wanting to pull back, pushing into her touch instead. Eyes now closed.

She moved against him, demanding attention, though she knew it had never been far from her. Kiss grew more demanding.

Restraint. That was the key here. He slowly pulled away from her. Said quietly, almost sadly, "Two minutes are up, luv."

Bit her lip, his taste still there. Swayed a little. He affected her so much in such a short time. "Right."

Just stood there, feeling kind of stupid. Finally, moved to go back toward the house. "We'd better be getting home, then."

"Right." Walked behind him. "What are we telling Dawn?"

"The truth. That we're not 'broken-up'. Just taking a break from each other. For our own good."

Nodded. "Can I add a rule?"

"I guess. Whatdaya have in mind, luv?"

"Neither one of us goes to Dawn to talk about it. We don't need her turned against each other."

He nodded. "Yeah. Deal. We tell her together. First thing in the morning."

"Right." Stopped by the staircase, felt awkward not kissing him goodnight, and knowing she wasn't sneaking down to see him later. "Um... Right. Night."

"Night, luv." Watched as she ascended the staircase, then went into the kitchen and through the basement door. For the first night that he'd been there, he'd be sleeping alone. Something told him that this was gonna be a long night.