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Ok, as usual, mush abounds. And yes, I do get over-dramatic. Warning: if you are for abortion, please don't read this.
And no, Pyjamas' step-father doesn't rape her. He only spanks her, but he's still a real jerk.
Also, 'Nara da Hedgehog' (formerly known as animelover and shadowlove, and probably soon to be known as a symbol that I don't think I can type), would you like me to help you with your fic, 'someone for me'? There are ways to make it sound a little less awkward.
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I heard the news... the military thinks this 'Shadow' is still alive... one mentioned an odd-ball hippie with a "bad hair-cut"... Pyjamas...
It's been several months, and she's hardly talked to me at all... and to think I'd miss her dud-visions... she's hiding something, and it's something big... I know it!
And I saw her in the shop the other night. She was buying what looked like a cane, but it was white... white canes are for blind people... is she going blind? It doesn't make sense! Why would they look for an old, blind woman?
Pyjamas doesn't know I saw her, and she won't answer my calls now... I'm so worried about her... Pyjamas, please be ok...
"Another coffee, please," a hedgehog at the table says.
"Sure thing, Super-I mean-Sonic" I answer, my heart panging with the memories of Super Sonic... I wish I could bring him back... I would try to find some way to keep him alive...
"Ebony! Are you alright?"
Sonic's voice startles me...
"I-I'm fine, Sonic... I'm just..." I sigh pitifully, and Sonic gives me a concerned look...
It's all I can do to keep from crying. I tried to hide it, but it still comes back, and I can't stop grieving... and Sonic knows what it's like. He lost Johnny, after all... I just don't know who's feeling worse, and who's trying harder to hide the grief...
Super... at night I hold myself, pretending you're there with me again... sleeping next to me... I wake up hugging the pillow, soaking it with tears... I wish you were here right now... here, as Super and not just Sonic...
I'm so hopeless...
********
S... H... A... D... O... W... I poke holes into the paper as Pyjamas guides my other hand... she runs my fingers over the holes I made... I just wrote my name in 'braille'...
I can read... and it's so wonderful... I know what those holes mean...
"Please, Pyjamas, show me again," I beg...
"Ok," she says.
I put the 'stylus' down, and touch her face, just to feel her smile... ever since that night, things haven't been the same. They've gotten better, but she still gets so sad... what was moving inside her that made her cry like that? It must have been something very dear... and who was yelling? She was just a little girl, like... Maria...
I'm always going to remember her... that beautiful smile, her jokes and games... and the kiss... I don't want to forget her anymore... the ache is gone... my 'heart' is no longer 'broken'... but it seems that I opened a wound in Pyjamas' heart... I wish I hadn't... I hate knowing she's in pain, probably as much as I was when I tried to destroy Mobius...
I had grown used to the alcohol and peroxide, but now Pyjamas has stopped using that, and it feels weird... not that I miss the sting...
Now she immerses me in water to clean me... I have to remember to close my eyes so the 'soap' doesn't sting them... it feels so good to be cleaned like that, with something that doesn't burn my whole body... and I smell different afterwards... like the soap...
After I spell my name, and a few other words, she picks me up, since I'm tired and weak and can't walk very well... I think I know where she's taking me...
Pyjamas sets me down on the toilet lid, and helps me take off my shoes... I reach down and untie one... I leaned too far! I'm going to fall!
"Oops!" I hear Pyjamas say, as she catches me, and sets me back up on the lid.
I pant in relief... I'm still so weak, that I sometimes fall... at least she's there to catch me... strange... I don't feel ashamed... not anymore...
Pyjamas holds me steady while I untie my shoe... she's so patient... I slip it off, then I take off my socks... I'm a little clumsy, but I get them off... it feels good to be able to do these things for myself again...
I hear Pyjamas turning the water on... and feel the warm, moist air... warm water is heaven...
While the water is running, I push myself off the toilet lid, and hold onto it for support with one hand, while the other one feels for Pyjamas... Sure enough, I can feel her take my hand... and embrace me... she gathers me into her lap, and kisses me... on the mouth... deeper... our tongues touch... I don't get so hot and uncomfortable anymore... this must be normal...
I rest my head against Pyjamas, and hear that familiar sound... and feel her stroking my back... Sometimes I don't mind not being able to see, even though I'd love to actually see what is happening on these 'shows'... I think it's so much better to just read or listen to the 'radio'...
She helps me up... and I step into the bathtub... the water is so warm... I take off my gloves, and hand them to her, then settle into the water, letting it engulf me... Pyjamas washes me, and 'shampoos' my fur... then, she 'rinses' me... I hold my breath, then let it out in a laugh as the water washes down my back and my face... I shake it off...
"Aahhh! You're gonna get me all wet!" Pyjamas laughs... before 'splashing' me...
When I get out, I feel this chill... I hate that feeling, being cold all over, shivering, fur dripping, like when I was first found... but Pyjamas always wraps me in a 'towel'... it's warm and fuzzy...
"Can you show me that braille book again, please?" I ask.
"Just as soon as you get dried off enough," she answers, rubbing my fur...
********
Shadow is almost well enough to walk on his own... and he's learning to read... I never thought I'd know such joy...
//Arthur... we shouldn't be doing this... what if Step-father finds out?//
//Don't worry. We'll get married, and you'll never have to worry about that sod again.//
//Arthur, I don't know... I don't think we should be... you know...//
//Dont' worry 'bout a thing, baby-doll, I'm the man you've been dreamin' of...//[author's note: got that from "What It's Like", by Everlast]
No... please no... I'm at home... my step-father is hitting me... please stop...
//Now I'll ask you again, do you want to go to the clinic?//
//No...//
He slaps me again... in the face...
//I don't think you heard me. Do you want to go to the clinic?//
I don't answer... I'm terrified...
//DO YOU WANT TO ABORT THAT FREAK??? DO YOU??? ANSWER ME NOW BEFORE I GET ANGRY!!!//
I start to cry... I'm so confused... then he grabs me... pulls down my slacks... no... he's... smacking me... on my bare bottom...
I'm shaking... sobbing... this happened years ago... why is it coming back to me? Why am I remembering it now?
Shadow reaches up, and wipes my tears, kisses them away... is he capable of understanding this?
"Pyjamas..." Shadow says... "I'm sorry I made you so sad... I won't touch your eyes again, if it hurts you like-"
"It's not your fault," I reassure him.
"Who was yelling at you?"
I freeze... how should I answer? What should I say? I don't even want to remember what happened... it's so painful and... I feel so ashamed... why couldn't I have...
"N-nobody..." I stammer...
"Somebody was hurting you..." Shadow says, obviously having heard my thoughts...
"Yes... he did..."
I wish I could see my real daddy again... why did you have to die? Why did Mummy have to go live with Step-Father? Why? He was mean... didn't like my eyes... made me... made me wear my hair... like... like this...
But he's dead now... I smile, then rise to my feet, sitting Shadow down... it's time for a change... I smile as I look in the mirror, and take the scissors, the same kind of scissors I had many times used to 'hurt' myself... and... *snip* *snip* *snip*...
Then I open my eyes... funny, I forgot how beautiful they looked, or so my mother and real father told me... silver... just like my father's...
"Yes, my eyes are silver, my dear step-father!" I say, "Try to smack my bum now! Come on, I dare you to step out of hell and beat me up! Come on and hit me, 'Step-Father'!"
I will never hide my eyes like that again!
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I get up from my seat, slowly pushing myself up... then my legs give out... I'm still not very steady... Pyjamas takes me into her arms, and I reach for her face, for her eyes... strange... they aren't covered...
"I cut my hair, Shadow," she says, "I've hidden my eyes for too long... I don't need to... anymore...
She cut her hair... it feels... different... she's so happy... but there's something I need to know...
"What's an abortion?" I ask.
"It's..." Pyjamas begins... "
She mind-links with me, and I 'see' and feel everything... the baby... killed... why did he force her to abort? especially when it hurt... Pyjamas was crying while they did that... I kiss her cheek again, and wrap my arms around her...
"It wasn't your fault. Your 'step-father' lied to you... you didn't want to kill your baby... it wasn't your fault... just like it wasn't my fault that Maria died... I was frightened, and didn't know what to do, and I didn't think to take her with me... If I had thought to take Maria and then run..."
"You couldn't have known," Pyjamas tells me, stroking my head, holding me close to her soft chest, "You were just a baby... you were so innocent... you couldn't have known..."
There's a long pause... then I kiss her again...
********
If Pyjamas doesn't answer me soon, I'm going to see what's up. If the G.U.N. has done anything to her, I'll... I don't like to think about what I'd do if they hurt my friend...
I talked with Sonic about this, and he does look worried, even though he's trying to just write it off as her typical weirdness. I can tell even he thinks something is up... I hate to get the others involved, but I can't just let my best friend get hurt...
I set down the cup of coffee that I've been not drinking... it's cold... That's it. If I don't get a call, I'm going to see what she's hiding... or better yet, who...