Another chapter. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far, I appreciate
it much. *Sniff* you guys have been so sweet about my crappy ramblings!
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I crept quietly downstairs. My brother frightened me when his anger reached this intensity, fear close to that I had felt around Frank on that night. I wasn't sure how he would react to me trying to talk to him after what I had just heard, but once again his expression seemed to soften as soon as he laid eyes on me. We stared at each other for a moment then he took me into his arms again, gently panting kisses on my neck. More than ever before we needed to be together, but knew that we shouldn't, if only for the welfare of the child. I could sense how frustrated he was so I did what I could for him before we settled back onto the sofa, embracing for hours. We both fell asleep there and didn't wake until the early hours of the next morning, when mother finally returned. Her anger seemed to have faded and she now looked simply exhausted, totally drained. I could tell she wasn't about to bawl at us again but Riff Raff nevertheless folded his arms protectively around me as she approached us.
"Come to the kitchen. I need to talk to you." We glanced at each other, Riff nodded and we followed her through to the tiny, dark kitchen where we huddled round the table. There were some papers and a set of keys laying on the table. "I've given this as much thought as I could, I'm not going to mince my words. I love you both, a mother's love for her children is impossible to destroy, but what you are doing seems disgusting to me, as it will do to most people you will encounter. Were you not my offspring I would have wasted no time in moving for your exile from society but as it stands this is clearly not the way forward. It seems that you two are very much in love and though it breaks my heart to see my babies engaging in such sick behaviour, you obviously make each other happier than I could ever hope to." She sighed heavily and closed her eyes briefly. "So, if you are both happy then I can draw at least some small comfort from what you are involved in. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't horribly ashamed of you, but you are both, after all, old enough to make your own decisions now." She paused again and I could see her trying to blink away tears. "So I'm moving out. There is an empty single flat for servants that has just become vacant. I shall move to there, not just so that I don't have to deal with what you're doing under my roof, but I also don't want to interfere any further in your lives. It's become clear that I can't stop your relationship, so this is my way of letting you be." Her voice was starting to break up. "I brought you up to make your own choices and stick by them. Heaven knows this isn't what I meant to happen, but I have to respect you for standing by each other. I have already checked out the new flat, it has furniture and everything I need. I'll move my personal effects over there later today. I will miss you both, more than any words can tell." she swallowed hard. "I love you both so much, but the thought of you.I'll visit from time to time, whenever you need me, there is no doubt in my mind that you'll need at least some guidance with your new baby, all new parents do." She opened her arms to us and we hugged her tightly. She cried. I had never seen her cry before. Soon I was sobbing too, the severity of the implications of my relationship with Riff Raff had finally hit me. We were losing our mother, our rock. Life was never going to be the same, no matter how often she visited, how much help she gave us. I had grown up more in that last ten minutes than at any other point in my life. She held me tightly and kissed my cheek, whispering "I love you, baby."
I cried very little the next day, even when she departed, leaving the two of us the unborn child to take care of ourselves. But I had little time to mourn her departure before I was once again required to work.
It took a few weeks to get used to mother simply not being around the house and in that time I went through many changes. My condition became outwardly visible, not to an enormous extent, but enough to provoke whispers amongst the other staff, until Riff Raff overheard them. One glare from him and their hushed gossip was silenced. I was feeling much happier and had begun throwing myself into my work with a previously unseen vigour. It didn't stop there, I started to give our house a thorough clean at least once a week, it never seemed tidy enough anymore. I was getting morning sickness more frequently, but that had become as regular as clockwork so we just worked around it. Life was pretty good, all things considered. I was even beginning to warm to the idea of being a mother. After all, there was still a chance that the baby's father was the person I loved and if this was the case, which I still prayed for, every night, the child would serve as an affirmation of our love and would fly in the face of all who disapproved.
Mum kept her word and visited once a week, Riff would cook for us and we would catch up over dinner. She soon became more of a friend than a family member, but she still offered a shoulder to cry on when I needed it. She brought with her all of the baby clothes she had kept from when Riff and I had been infants and she gave me invaluable advice on how to cope with every aspect of my pregnancy. She was, however, still very firm and motherly with me about getting maternity leave. Once I reached six months I was to tell our employers and arrange for some time off. I was dreading telling the Queen, but I had my brother to support me and no matter what their reaction was, I would always have my family to take care of me.
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I crept quietly downstairs. My brother frightened me when his anger reached this intensity, fear close to that I had felt around Frank on that night. I wasn't sure how he would react to me trying to talk to him after what I had just heard, but once again his expression seemed to soften as soon as he laid eyes on me. We stared at each other for a moment then he took me into his arms again, gently panting kisses on my neck. More than ever before we needed to be together, but knew that we shouldn't, if only for the welfare of the child. I could sense how frustrated he was so I did what I could for him before we settled back onto the sofa, embracing for hours. We both fell asleep there and didn't wake until the early hours of the next morning, when mother finally returned. Her anger seemed to have faded and she now looked simply exhausted, totally drained. I could tell she wasn't about to bawl at us again but Riff Raff nevertheless folded his arms protectively around me as she approached us.
"Come to the kitchen. I need to talk to you." We glanced at each other, Riff nodded and we followed her through to the tiny, dark kitchen where we huddled round the table. There were some papers and a set of keys laying on the table. "I've given this as much thought as I could, I'm not going to mince my words. I love you both, a mother's love for her children is impossible to destroy, but what you are doing seems disgusting to me, as it will do to most people you will encounter. Were you not my offspring I would have wasted no time in moving for your exile from society but as it stands this is clearly not the way forward. It seems that you two are very much in love and though it breaks my heart to see my babies engaging in such sick behaviour, you obviously make each other happier than I could ever hope to." She sighed heavily and closed her eyes briefly. "So, if you are both happy then I can draw at least some small comfort from what you are involved in. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't horribly ashamed of you, but you are both, after all, old enough to make your own decisions now." She paused again and I could see her trying to blink away tears. "So I'm moving out. There is an empty single flat for servants that has just become vacant. I shall move to there, not just so that I don't have to deal with what you're doing under my roof, but I also don't want to interfere any further in your lives. It's become clear that I can't stop your relationship, so this is my way of letting you be." Her voice was starting to break up. "I brought you up to make your own choices and stick by them. Heaven knows this isn't what I meant to happen, but I have to respect you for standing by each other. I have already checked out the new flat, it has furniture and everything I need. I'll move my personal effects over there later today. I will miss you both, more than any words can tell." she swallowed hard. "I love you both so much, but the thought of you.I'll visit from time to time, whenever you need me, there is no doubt in my mind that you'll need at least some guidance with your new baby, all new parents do." She opened her arms to us and we hugged her tightly. She cried. I had never seen her cry before. Soon I was sobbing too, the severity of the implications of my relationship with Riff Raff had finally hit me. We were losing our mother, our rock. Life was never going to be the same, no matter how often she visited, how much help she gave us. I had grown up more in that last ten minutes than at any other point in my life. She held me tightly and kissed my cheek, whispering "I love you, baby."
I cried very little the next day, even when she departed, leaving the two of us the unborn child to take care of ourselves. But I had little time to mourn her departure before I was once again required to work.
It took a few weeks to get used to mother simply not being around the house and in that time I went through many changes. My condition became outwardly visible, not to an enormous extent, but enough to provoke whispers amongst the other staff, until Riff Raff overheard them. One glare from him and their hushed gossip was silenced. I was feeling much happier and had begun throwing myself into my work with a previously unseen vigour. It didn't stop there, I started to give our house a thorough clean at least once a week, it never seemed tidy enough anymore. I was getting morning sickness more frequently, but that had become as regular as clockwork so we just worked around it. Life was pretty good, all things considered. I was even beginning to warm to the idea of being a mother. After all, there was still a chance that the baby's father was the person I loved and if this was the case, which I still prayed for, every night, the child would serve as an affirmation of our love and would fly in the face of all who disapproved.
Mum kept her word and visited once a week, Riff would cook for us and we would catch up over dinner. She soon became more of a friend than a family member, but she still offered a shoulder to cry on when I needed it. She brought with her all of the baby clothes she had kept from when Riff and I had been infants and she gave me invaluable advice on how to cope with every aspect of my pregnancy. She was, however, still very firm and motherly with me about getting maternity leave. Once I reached six months I was to tell our employers and arrange for some time off. I was dreading telling the Queen, but I had my brother to support me and no matter what their reaction was, I would always have my family to take care of me.