Part 3: The Truth About Soul Mates
The next morning, Monica returned triumphant with her bags of baby shower presents. She saw Joey asleep on the couch and smiled, finding him adorable. After putting the bags inside the nursery, she came back and leaned over Joey. "Hey, Joey! You wanna stay for breakfast?"
Joey blinked and sat up with a gasp. "Monica, you're home!"
"Yep! So what do you say? Pancakes?"
"Uh, yeah. Thanks."
"No problem! And while I do that, you gotta put my comforter back and go get dressed. Oh, and make sure you fix up my couch just like it was, okay?"
"Yeah, sure."
She started for the kitchen just when Chandler emerged from the bedroom, looking as though he barely got any sleep.
"Monica?"
"Hey, sweetie!" she came over and kissed him. "You look all worn out. Did you and Joey stay up late together?"
"Uh, yeah."
"Well, I hope you had fun at least. Ross said he missed you babysitting last night with David; you know, he really wanted to give you some more parenting tips." She laughed. "But I guess you two wanted some time alone, huh?"
Chandler blushed, and Joey looked alarmed.
Monica hit her husband's shoulder playfully. "Come on, your decision to make more time for Joey? You guys have one-track minds!" She laughed and headed to the kitchen, getting out the ingredients for the batter. "I have *such* a craving for pancakes."
Joey looked at Chandler silently, then finally rose from the couch and went to the bathroom to dress and wash up.
Without being asked, Chandler put the comforter back where it belonged and fixed up the couch the way Monica liked it. He knew the drill.
As she cooked, Monica talked about the great time she had with the girls, and how they had gossiped about the guys just like in their younger, single days. She also described the morning after, when Phoebe happily moved in with David at last.
Chandler responded to Monica's conversation in a distracted state, still lost in thoughts about the incident last night.
Then Joey emerged from the bathroom, and the atmosphere became even more uncomfortable. He would have left, had he been able to come up with some excuse for why he would turn down free pancakes.
When they all sat down to eat, Monica noticed Joey's quietness and asked him how his latest movie was going. Joey shrugged and said it was okay. So Monica let it go, and chattered about baby stuff instead.
Joey finally left for his apartment, saying that he had to check on the birds.
Chandler hesitated, then announced to Monica that he was going to visit the birds too.
She smiled at his lame excuse. "Okay, sweetie, you spend as much guy time as you need with Joey before the baby gets here. Just shower the bird smell off you when you get back, okay?" She started to wash the dishes.
He nodded docilely and went across the hall.
***
When Chandler knocked and came in, Joey was sitting in his recliner and thinking silently. He turned around and did not know what to say.
Chandler spoke awkwardly. "It--it was my fault, you know. Me asking you to share the bed with me."
Joey tried to shrug casually. "That's okay. I said yes. Even if we were brothers, I shouldn't have said that, right?"
Chandler nodded, then sat down near Joey. "Um, can I, can I talk to you about that lobster thing? Soul mates and stuff?"
"Uh, sure." Joey avoided meeting Chandler's eyes. "I'm, um, feeling much better now, so you don't have to worry about me. Plenty of fish in the sea. I'll find somebody. Give it time."
"I mean, about me and Monica."
"What?"
"Me and Mon, we're meant to be together, right?"
"Yeah, of course you are. What--what is it?"
Chandler stared down at the floor and nervously wrung his hands. "Do you remember back when me and Mon were just friends? Way before London, I offered to be her backup all the time, and she brushed me off, saying I wasn't boyfriend material."
Joey stared at him, not sure where he was going with this.
Chandler continued. "Then bam, London, I'm in the right place at the right time. I'm there to comfort her, and she finally wants me again, like she did at that first Thanksgiving at the Gellers' house. We come back from London and we're still miraculously a couple. You guys find out, and everybody's happy for us. Then Vegas comes and we move in together. Then I propose, and we get married, and we're having a baby. I'm good enough for her now; I'm matured enough."
Joey frowned at the unexpected sarcasm in Chandler's voice. "What--what are you saying here?"
"I-I was up all night thinking about it after you left me. I remembered every moment, relived every feeling." He began to ramble and unravel. "I love Mon, I do. All her quirks, all her compulsions. She's neurotic like me, and we fix each other. We work. I love her, I still do, and I'm even ready to have kids!"
"Chandler, Chandler, calm down. Nobody's doubting that. You're meant to be, you're perfect."
"Yeah, yeah, Joey. That's what you say! That's what you're supposed to say."
"I mean it, man. Stop looking like that."
"No, I mean, if Monica loves me, she should say all that stuff you said, right? She should say we're soul mates, we're perfect, we're lobsters. All that romantic stuff she said in her vows."
"Yeah, she said it! What's wrong, then?"
"She's saying something different now."
"Different?"
"Whenever I got jealous about Richard or somebody, she used to reassure me all the time, but now... Look, remember when Phoebe met Don, that food guy that she said was Monica's soul mate, and I wasn't?"
"Uh-huh."
"I said that I didn't believe in soul mates, just to be macho, you know? But I do believe really. Monica taught me all about commitments and love and stuff, so why wouldn't I? Then Phoebe introduced Don to Monica, and I got scared that maybe she was right. So I finally talked to Monica about it, and she said that she didn't believe in soul mates either. She said, 'I don't think that you and I were destined to end up together. I think that we fell in love and work hard at our relationship.' She said she wasn't going to leave me for Don, and I should stop worrying."
"So? There you go. Don't worry."
"Don't you get it? She should have said, 'Don isn't my soul mate, you are. Phoebe's not right.' She should have talked about all our years together, and how she's loved me since London."
"Maybe she just assumes you know all that stuff now."
"Yeah, but why did she say she doesn't believe in soul mates? Why did she say we just 'work hard'? We all believed in lobsters when Phoebe was talking about Ross and Rachel. Did Monica change her mind because of all the craziness with Ross and Rachel, or did she change her mind about me?"
"Chandler, stop it! This is nuts."
"It's not nuts! I figured it out. She doesn't love me anymore; she's just used to me. She's invested too much work into this marriage to give up, and she wants babies before it's too late."
"Chandler, stop it. That's crazy--!"
"I love you," he said suddenly.
"Huh?" Joey lost his train of thought.
"I love Monica, but I love you too. I just realized it; I figured it out last night."
"Love me? What, like best friends? Like brothers?"
"You know what I mean. What we were talking about last night, about loving two people at once. Not being able to help it. I love you."
"Chandler, I, um--"
He pulled Joey close and kissed him. "Tell me you love me. You're not faking it, like Monica. You're my lobster."
"Chandler, you're married, you've got the baby coming..."
"I know." He swallowed guiltily. "I wish I had known all this before we tried having a baby. I wish it could have been you and me in London."
"Wishes don't change things."
"I know. When we get divorced, she'll probably get custody of our kid, but maybe she and Don will let me be involved anyway, like Carol and Susan let Ross be in Ben's life."
Joey was horrified. "No, don't get divorced! Don't break up your family. I don't want that--"
"*I* want it. I finally know how my dad felt when he ended it with my mom. Even if you don't love me, Joey, I couldn't do this anymore. I couldn't be happy knowing that Monica is just settling for me."
"You don't *know* that!"
"I'll ask her, point-blank, today. You'll see. Just, um, just tell me you'll help me get through this. Please, Joey? If you love me as a friend at least--"
"I love you. I just... love you." Joey looked into his eyes at last, brushing the hair away from his face. He kissed Chandler back with all his heart.
They were still kissing and embracing when Monica walked in on them. "Oops!" she said. "Sorry, I'll come back later. Just wanted to ask about lunch."
They turned to her in shock and confusion, and Chandler called out, "Wait, Monica!"
She came back from the door and closed it behind her. "Yeah?"
Chandler still couldn't understand her reaction. "You--you saw us, didn't you?"
"Yeah," she repeated, without batting an eye. Then she started to laugh a little. "You didn't think I knew, did you?"
"Um, no." He glanced at Joey, who was still puzzled too. "You're--you're all right with this?"
"Uh-huh." She leaned over the kitchen counter and explained herself. "Look, I-I kinda knew for over a year now how you felt about Joey. I mean, how could I ignore what I see when you guys are together? I didn't want to believe it at first; maybe I was just imagining it, you know? And if I wasn't, well... with how you felt about your dad, I didn't know if you'd ever admit it to yourself, or to Joey."
She shrugged. "Who knew how Joey might respond, anyway? So why say anything if there was a chance that I could hold onto our marriage? I held onto that hope for a long time, especially when you said that you were ready to have a baby all of a sudden. But now I've faced the truth that we're just good friends who used to be more. But--but, Chandler, I really want this baby. You still want it, right, or am I just imagining it?"
"I do. I want our baby."
"Good!" She looked relieved. "Then we'll have a family, even if it's a little weird. So, um, I don't know if you want to stay married for the sake of the baby, or if you think it would be easier on our kid if we ended this now, before it's born. You're the child of a divorce, Chandler."
"I-I... Wait, don't you want to go and find Richard again, or Don, or somebody?"
"Yeah, what about you?" Joey asked.
She shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe. That's too much to think about right now. I just want to be happy with our baby, and I want you guys to be happy, too."
"Monica!" Chandler went to hug her, and Joey joined in too. "You're too good to us, Mon. I was dreading telling you about Joey. Now I know it's going to be okay, whatever we decide. All three of us."
"Whoa!" Monica said, reaching for her belly. "The four of us, you mean."
They all felt the baby kicking, and smiled.
The next morning, Monica returned triumphant with her bags of baby shower presents. She saw Joey asleep on the couch and smiled, finding him adorable. After putting the bags inside the nursery, she came back and leaned over Joey. "Hey, Joey! You wanna stay for breakfast?"
Joey blinked and sat up with a gasp. "Monica, you're home!"
"Yep! So what do you say? Pancakes?"
"Uh, yeah. Thanks."
"No problem! And while I do that, you gotta put my comforter back and go get dressed. Oh, and make sure you fix up my couch just like it was, okay?"
"Yeah, sure."
She started for the kitchen just when Chandler emerged from the bedroom, looking as though he barely got any sleep.
"Monica?"
"Hey, sweetie!" she came over and kissed him. "You look all worn out. Did you and Joey stay up late together?"
"Uh, yeah."
"Well, I hope you had fun at least. Ross said he missed you babysitting last night with David; you know, he really wanted to give you some more parenting tips." She laughed. "But I guess you two wanted some time alone, huh?"
Chandler blushed, and Joey looked alarmed.
Monica hit her husband's shoulder playfully. "Come on, your decision to make more time for Joey? You guys have one-track minds!" She laughed and headed to the kitchen, getting out the ingredients for the batter. "I have *such* a craving for pancakes."
Joey looked at Chandler silently, then finally rose from the couch and went to the bathroom to dress and wash up.
Without being asked, Chandler put the comforter back where it belonged and fixed up the couch the way Monica liked it. He knew the drill.
As she cooked, Monica talked about the great time she had with the girls, and how they had gossiped about the guys just like in their younger, single days. She also described the morning after, when Phoebe happily moved in with David at last.
Chandler responded to Monica's conversation in a distracted state, still lost in thoughts about the incident last night.
Then Joey emerged from the bathroom, and the atmosphere became even more uncomfortable. He would have left, had he been able to come up with some excuse for why he would turn down free pancakes.
When they all sat down to eat, Monica noticed Joey's quietness and asked him how his latest movie was going. Joey shrugged and said it was okay. So Monica let it go, and chattered about baby stuff instead.
Joey finally left for his apartment, saying that he had to check on the birds.
Chandler hesitated, then announced to Monica that he was going to visit the birds too.
She smiled at his lame excuse. "Okay, sweetie, you spend as much guy time as you need with Joey before the baby gets here. Just shower the bird smell off you when you get back, okay?" She started to wash the dishes.
He nodded docilely and went across the hall.
***
When Chandler knocked and came in, Joey was sitting in his recliner and thinking silently. He turned around and did not know what to say.
Chandler spoke awkwardly. "It--it was my fault, you know. Me asking you to share the bed with me."
Joey tried to shrug casually. "That's okay. I said yes. Even if we were brothers, I shouldn't have said that, right?"
Chandler nodded, then sat down near Joey. "Um, can I, can I talk to you about that lobster thing? Soul mates and stuff?"
"Uh, sure." Joey avoided meeting Chandler's eyes. "I'm, um, feeling much better now, so you don't have to worry about me. Plenty of fish in the sea. I'll find somebody. Give it time."
"I mean, about me and Monica."
"What?"
"Me and Mon, we're meant to be together, right?"
"Yeah, of course you are. What--what is it?"
Chandler stared down at the floor and nervously wrung his hands. "Do you remember back when me and Mon were just friends? Way before London, I offered to be her backup all the time, and she brushed me off, saying I wasn't boyfriend material."
Joey stared at him, not sure where he was going with this.
Chandler continued. "Then bam, London, I'm in the right place at the right time. I'm there to comfort her, and she finally wants me again, like she did at that first Thanksgiving at the Gellers' house. We come back from London and we're still miraculously a couple. You guys find out, and everybody's happy for us. Then Vegas comes and we move in together. Then I propose, and we get married, and we're having a baby. I'm good enough for her now; I'm matured enough."
Joey frowned at the unexpected sarcasm in Chandler's voice. "What--what are you saying here?"
"I-I was up all night thinking about it after you left me. I remembered every moment, relived every feeling." He began to ramble and unravel. "I love Mon, I do. All her quirks, all her compulsions. She's neurotic like me, and we fix each other. We work. I love her, I still do, and I'm even ready to have kids!"
"Chandler, Chandler, calm down. Nobody's doubting that. You're meant to be, you're perfect."
"Yeah, yeah, Joey. That's what you say! That's what you're supposed to say."
"I mean it, man. Stop looking like that."
"No, I mean, if Monica loves me, she should say all that stuff you said, right? She should say we're soul mates, we're perfect, we're lobsters. All that romantic stuff she said in her vows."
"Yeah, she said it! What's wrong, then?"
"She's saying something different now."
"Different?"
"Whenever I got jealous about Richard or somebody, she used to reassure me all the time, but now... Look, remember when Phoebe met Don, that food guy that she said was Monica's soul mate, and I wasn't?"
"Uh-huh."
"I said that I didn't believe in soul mates, just to be macho, you know? But I do believe really. Monica taught me all about commitments and love and stuff, so why wouldn't I? Then Phoebe introduced Don to Monica, and I got scared that maybe she was right. So I finally talked to Monica about it, and she said that she didn't believe in soul mates either. She said, 'I don't think that you and I were destined to end up together. I think that we fell in love and work hard at our relationship.' She said she wasn't going to leave me for Don, and I should stop worrying."
"So? There you go. Don't worry."
"Don't you get it? She should have said, 'Don isn't my soul mate, you are. Phoebe's not right.' She should have talked about all our years together, and how she's loved me since London."
"Maybe she just assumes you know all that stuff now."
"Yeah, but why did she say she doesn't believe in soul mates? Why did she say we just 'work hard'? We all believed in lobsters when Phoebe was talking about Ross and Rachel. Did Monica change her mind because of all the craziness with Ross and Rachel, or did she change her mind about me?"
"Chandler, stop it! This is nuts."
"It's not nuts! I figured it out. She doesn't love me anymore; she's just used to me. She's invested too much work into this marriage to give up, and she wants babies before it's too late."
"Chandler, stop it. That's crazy--!"
"I love you," he said suddenly.
"Huh?" Joey lost his train of thought.
"I love Monica, but I love you too. I just realized it; I figured it out last night."
"Love me? What, like best friends? Like brothers?"
"You know what I mean. What we were talking about last night, about loving two people at once. Not being able to help it. I love you."
"Chandler, I, um--"
He pulled Joey close and kissed him. "Tell me you love me. You're not faking it, like Monica. You're my lobster."
"Chandler, you're married, you've got the baby coming..."
"I know." He swallowed guiltily. "I wish I had known all this before we tried having a baby. I wish it could have been you and me in London."
"Wishes don't change things."
"I know. When we get divorced, she'll probably get custody of our kid, but maybe she and Don will let me be involved anyway, like Carol and Susan let Ross be in Ben's life."
Joey was horrified. "No, don't get divorced! Don't break up your family. I don't want that--"
"*I* want it. I finally know how my dad felt when he ended it with my mom. Even if you don't love me, Joey, I couldn't do this anymore. I couldn't be happy knowing that Monica is just settling for me."
"You don't *know* that!"
"I'll ask her, point-blank, today. You'll see. Just, um, just tell me you'll help me get through this. Please, Joey? If you love me as a friend at least--"
"I love you. I just... love you." Joey looked into his eyes at last, brushing the hair away from his face. He kissed Chandler back with all his heart.
They were still kissing and embracing when Monica walked in on them. "Oops!" she said. "Sorry, I'll come back later. Just wanted to ask about lunch."
They turned to her in shock and confusion, and Chandler called out, "Wait, Monica!"
She came back from the door and closed it behind her. "Yeah?"
Chandler still couldn't understand her reaction. "You--you saw us, didn't you?"
"Yeah," she repeated, without batting an eye. Then she started to laugh a little. "You didn't think I knew, did you?"
"Um, no." He glanced at Joey, who was still puzzled too. "You're--you're all right with this?"
"Uh-huh." She leaned over the kitchen counter and explained herself. "Look, I-I kinda knew for over a year now how you felt about Joey. I mean, how could I ignore what I see when you guys are together? I didn't want to believe it at first; maybe I was just imagining it, you know? And if I wasn't, well... with how you felt about your dad, I didn't know if you'd ever admit it to yourself, or to Joey."
She shrugged. "Who knew how Joey might respond, anyway? So why say anything if there was a chance that I could hold onto our marriage? I held onto that hope for a long time, especially when you said that you were ready to have a baby all of a sudden. But now I've faced the truth that we're just good friends who used to be more. But--but, Chandler, I really want this baby. You still want it, right, or am I just imagining it?"
"I do. I want our baby."
"Good!" She looked relieved. "Then we'll have a family, even if it's a little weird. So, um, I don't know if you want to stay married for the sake of the baby, or if you think it would be easier on our kid if we ended this now, before it's born. You're the child of a divorce, Chandler."
"I-I... Wait, don't you want to go and find Richard again, or Don, or somebody?"
"Yeah, what about you?" Joey asked.
She shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe. That's too much to think about right now. I just want to be happy with our baby, and I want you guys to be happy, too."
"Monica!" Chandler went to hug her, and Joey joined in too. "You're too good to us, Mon. I was dreading telling you about Joey. Now I know it's going to be okay, whatever we decide. All three of us."
"Whoa!" Monica said, reaching for her belly. "The four of us, you mean."
They all felt the baby kicking, and smiled.