Ivy woke up with a start. She couldn't remember why at first, but there was something important about this day. As sleep receded, her memory returned: the students from Hogwarts would be visiting Hogsmeade. It was nearly Christmas and she and Rose had gone to great lengths to make sure the Three Broomsticks was festive for the holiday.
They'd spent an entire day freezing in the forest, in search of the perfect Christmas tree. Hagrid consented to go with them, as much to chop down their tree as to stand guard against roaming dementors. Ivy'd felt like some huge breed of wood nymph, running from tree to tree, inspecting each for its strengths and flaws.
When the perfect tree was found, Hagrid made quick work of felling it, and then dragging it out of the woods. Ivy trotted beside him, while Rose followed.
"You look like Santa Claus... no wait," Ivy'd told Hagrid as he plodded along the road with the tree dragging along behind him. "Father Christmas," she finished, searching her brain for the more European version of the name. She'd managed to catch up and pass him, and had turned around to walk backwards, so she could enjoy the scene that stretched out before her.
Snow had covered Hagrid's great mane, and as he leaned into his work, he reminded Ivy of pictures she's seen of Santa dragging a pack full of presents. Thinking of presents brought a furrow to her brow: she wanted more than anything for her gifts this year to express all that her new friends meant to her.
"What do you want for Christmas, Hagrid?" she'd asked.
He had stopped in his tracks and given her a funny look. "A li'l help with this tree, maybe?" They'd gone deeper into the forest than they'd realized, and Hagrid's chest heaved as he stood to catch his breath.
"We're almost home now," she reminded. "And I don't think I'd be much help." Ivy looked past him to check on Rose's progress. She was just emerging from the woods.
"Have you ever made snow angels?" Ivy asked, then laughed at the thought of Hagrid, beard waving, laying in the snow to make an angel.
"Probably not," she finished, without waiting for an answer.
"Yer right about that," Hagrid answered. "What's a snow angel?"
With that Ivy had fallen backwards into a bank of snow, flapped her arms and legs back and forth for a minute, then stood carefully to her feet. Jumping away from where she stood, she turned and presented her print in the snow.
"There. One fresh snow angel." The movement of her hands and feet had made a decent likeness of an angel in the snow.
"That's pretty good," he'd replied. "But can ya do this?" He pulled something pink and frilly out from the depths of his moleskin coat. It was an umbrella. To Ivy's amazement he'd pointed the umbrella into the snow bank, and whispered a few words she couldn't hear.
Immediately snow had begun to swirl around them, making Ivy feel as though she'd been shrunken and placed in the center of a magical snow globe. When the snow settled, she turned to see a life sized snow-hippogriff standing in the road, wings outstretched as if ready to take flight.
"Amazing!" she'd exclaimed, running for a closer look. Mittened hands reached up to run along the creature's icy back, then she'd turned to congratulate Hagrid.
"You're gonna get in trouble for that, Hagrid," came Rose's warning voice from behind them. She'd finally caught up, and was standing in the middle of the street, hands on hips.
Hagrid had only shrugged and hefted the tree's rope back across his shoulder.
"Why would he get in trouble for making something so beautiful?" Ivy'd questioned, running a hand along the edge of one sparkling hippogriff wing.
"He's not supposed to do magic without permission from Dumbledore." Rose told her.
Hagrid hadn't said a word, but suddenly Ivy was saddened for him. It was one thing not to have any magic to use, but it was another to have magic and not be allowed to use it. Ivy had found herself walking to the tow rope and gripping it close to the tree. Maybe she couldn't help much, but she felt the need to stand by Hagrid and show her support.
"It looks just like Beaky," she muttered defiantly.
Hagrid only grunted from deep in his throat and kept pulling, turning to look back once and give her a wink.
Something between them had changed that day. What the change had been, she couldn't exactly put her finger on, but Ivy knew things were different. She caught Hagrid watching her every now and then, and when their eyes met, his cheeks would flush. This would cause Ivy to go pink herself, and they'd stand there, eyes locked, looking decidedly foolish. But feeling something that cemented their friendship beyond anything Ivy'd imagined. Togetherness was the only word she could find for it. A togetherness that stayed with her even after Hagrid went home, and kept her cozy as she went to bed at night.
"What are you dreaming about?" Rose's voice cut in to Ivy's thoughts and brought her back to reality.
Ivy only shrugged and gave a sheepish grin.
"Well, when you decide to come back to earth, we've got a huge day ahead of us. Christmas Hogwarts weekend is the biggest of the year. I may pop up to the castle and ask Dumbledore for an extra elf or two. They can keep busy in the kitchen while we stay out front."
Ivy nodded. "That would help. But what about Willa?" She threw off her blankets, then immediately began to grab for them again. "It's cold in here!"
Rose bent over her. "That's because nobody's downstairs to tend to the fire. Willa won't mind having a few more elves around, if she thinks she'll be getting some help. "
Ivy slipped out of bed, pulling a robe across her shoulders. "OK, then. You get the house elves, I'll get the fire." She watched Rose Apparate, then ran downstairs to the kitchen.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Merry Christmas, Blackie," Ivy whispered into the morning air. An icy breeze caught puffs of her breath and sent them careening down the alley. Even in her heaviest robe, Ivy shivered. She maneuvered herself carefully down the frozen steps with a big wooden bowl in her hand.
"Left-over Brunswick stew for your morning's dining pleasure," she said out loud, even though she hadn't seen the dog yet. "Better hurry before it freezes over."
She waited in the snow for a minute, no longer bothering to hide the fact that she fed the big black beast on a regular basis. No matter what Rose or Remus said, she had no more worries about Blackie. They'd spent too many hours together down by the vulture tree, and by now she'd told him all of her deepest secrets, emboldened by his understanding gaze, and the fact that since dog's couldn't talk, dogs couldn't tell.
"There'll be lots more later. I promise you all the best Christmas dinner left-overs. I only wish I could invite you in. It's cold out here." She shivered again and headed inside, stopping on the top step to look around for Blackie. He hadn't appeared yet, but Ivy knew he'd show up eventually.
Closing the door behind her, Ivy joined Rose in the kitchen. A self-stirring cauldron bubbled on the hearth, and a Christmas goose baked in the bowels of the pot-bellied stove, surrounded by potatoes and carrots. Pies were lined up the counter -- cherry and pumpkin, apple and mince. Ivy'd made two carrot cakes for the occasion. They sat near the pies, slathered with cream cheese frosting, along with frothy jugs of chilled pumpkin juice. Nearly everything was ready, and Ivy was excited about the feast.
"Who did we invited again?" she asked Rose, who was putting the finishing touches on a huge glazed ham.
"The Honeydukes, and the boys from over at Zonko's. I asked Remus, but he's feeling a little under the weather. You invited Hagrid. And... let's see. Mr. Cornelius, the postman. I think that's all."
"We have too much food."
"Of course we do, Ivy. It's Christmas. I'm sure you can feed whatever's left over to that beastly dog outside." She turned and gave Ivy a meaningful stare.
"I know," Ivy sighed, checking to make sure the cauldron was still stirring. "I promised not to feed him, but..."
Rose waved her out of the way with a pot-holder. "I have to check on the goose."
"You're not mad at me are you?" Ivy asked. "About the dog, I mean."
"No, I'm not mad. It's Christmas. Nobody's supposed to angry Christmas morning. I've asked you to be careful, but you're a grown woman after all. And if you go out there and look under the tree you'll see how 'not angry' I am"
Ivy's gaze turned toward the pub's Christmas tree, remembering again the trip she and Rose had taken into the woods with Hagrid to pick it out. It stood alight even now with bright golden glow balls and candles that burned with flame but were not consumed. She and Rose had strung popcorn and cranberries, then draped them all over the tree, and Hagrid had topped it off with a big silver star that scraped the ceiling. This was the happiest Christmas that Ivy could remember, and before she knew it, the tree began to swim a little before her eyes, and a tear slid down her cheek.
"Presents..." she whispered, walking across the pub to peer beneath the tree's lowest branches. She ran her fingertips along a blue- and gold-wrapped box labeled "Ivy", Then picked up another with Hagrid's name on it.
"Presents!" She jumped to her feet and ran up stairs, suddenly remembering her own. She and Rose had gone shopping in Diagon Alley before Christmas, and Ivy had hidden her gifts beneath her bed. She'd found emerald green heels for Rosie, and a pin made of three silver broomsticks. For Hagrid she'd purchased a dragon figurine that could walk about and flex its wings. It would even open its mouth when you stroked it. A tiny flame erupted from its jaws from time to time. She'd almost bought him a fairy tale book, but put it back upon remembering that dragons get killed in the end of most fairy tales she'd ever read. She'd settled for a book entitled "Know Your Magical Creatures," and a box of fudge truffles from Honeydukes.
For Professor Lupin she'd found a set of six quills in an ornate wooden case. They came with a color changing ink spell and were guaranteed to never need a refill.
She was arranging them underneath the tree when the front door burst open. Swirls of snow came inside as the Honeydukes arrived. They'd brought an enormous Christmas pudding and Fizzing Whizzbees and a lovely basket filled with assorted chocolate candies. Not far behind them came the boys from Zonko's Joke Shop, Zeke and Zack.
Never before had Ivy seen two young men so opposite in appearance. Zeke stood tall and long of face, with a slight overbite that became even more pronounced when he smiled. Zack, on the other hand, was short and plump, with great jowls that shook when he laughed, which was quite often. They both shared the same sparkling blue eyes, and had their father Zinnuis not been feeling under the weather, Ivy would have discovered where they'd inherited that particular feature.
They entered the pub in an explosion of laughter, slipping on the top step and nearly losing the entire contents of a basket full of Christmas crackers. They greeted Ivy by kissing her cheeks at the same time, and she was charmed at once.
The next arrival was Mr. Cornelius, the postman. Ivy'd never seen him when he wasn't all business, so it was a nice surprise when he arrived grinning, and bearing two enormous bottles of elderberry wine.
Hagrid was the last arrival, his mane covered with a layer of new snow. Over his shoulder he'd slung a huge velvet sack stuffed with gifts, and Ivy was reminded again of Santa Claus. He shook his head and snow flew in all directions, then bellowed, "Merry Christmas!"
The cry was taken up by all in the room, then tables were sent flying to the walls as Rose made room for the one long table they'd use to share their Christmas dinner. Ivy watched, wide-eyed, as old friends greeted each other with warm kisses on snow-chilled cheeks. Everyone pitched in, bringing platters and bowls from the kitchen to the table. Zack Zonko got a bit carried away and exploded the first Christmas cracker, sending confetti and ribbons flying across the room. A jaunty green pointed wizard hat flew from the cracker, landing perkily on Rose's head.
This was nothing like any Christmas Ivy'd ever experienced. She had to take a seat so as not to be overwhelmed by all the emotions that assaulted her. There was joy at being embraced by such a happy crowd, for not one of the guests had even questioned Ivy's right to be here, then there was sadness when she pondered all the years she'd missed out on gatherings like this. And of course the fear of being found out never left her mind whenever she found herself in the midst of a group of magical people.
So far her Theory of Knowing had been disproved time and again, but every now and then she'd imagine a sideways glance or whisper behind a hand, and wonder if that meant somebody Knew. Knew she wasn't magical and Knew she didn't belong. She stood to her feet and was heading toward the kitchen when she was stopped by Hagrid the giant.
"Happy Christmas, Ivy," he announced, handing her a mug of steaming butterbeer. She took the mug and saluted him.
"Merry Christmas to you."
His beetle black eyes were bright as she'd ever seen them, his cheeks ruddy from walking to the pub. The great tangle of his hair and beard still sparkled with an occasional unmelted snowflake, and as Ivy took him in, she found her breath came only in constricted little gasps. Her eyes widened as she realized, he takes my very breath away.
For once it was she who hid her face behind a mug, blushing furiously. The butterbeer warmed her down to her toes, and as she drained the mug she was able to look him in the eye.
"You still look like Santa," she said, feeling her blush deepen.
He leaned toward her and murmured, "Maybe I am."
Ivy laughed out loud and for a moment her whole world revolved around the sound. She felt as warm and golden as the light that diffused through the mullioned windows. When something popped just over her head, and she looked up to see a ribboned sprig of mistletoe, she was not in the least surprised, nor was she surprised to see that it was Madam Rosmerta's wand that had produced the floating plant. Ivy saw the same sly glint in Rosie's eye that had previously danced in Hagrid's and when the giant bent to embrace her and kiss her full on the mouth, she only laughed louder and returned his embrace.
It wasn't her imagination when the kiss went a bit longer than most mistletoe inspired kisses go. It was followed by another, and even as the room erupted into good-natured cheers, Ivy found that now not only could she not breathe, but her head was swimming as well. Her grip on Hagrid tightened, not out of passion, but just a need to hold on. To keep her balance as her legs went weak And even after their lips parted, their eyes remained locked on each other for a long moment that threatened to change them both forever.
Not for the first time, Ivy imagined the giant loosing 5 pound butterflies inside her. She felt as she had at the end of that long ago hippogriff ride, unbalanced and exhilarated at the same time. She felt behind her and landed in a fortunately placed chair. When she looked back at Hagrid, he looked a little green around the gills. He sat down in a chair across the table from her, and took a long swallow from the contents of his tankard.
Overhead, more sprigs of mistletoe appeared, although Ivy did not see them. The laughter that erupted at the bar when Zack Zonko made the mistletoe above him and Rose reappear sounded like something that was happening in another room. Finally she reached across the table and gave Hagrid's hand a squeeze. Her movement seemed to break the spell they'd both been under, and he reached into a pocket, producing a small gold box. He handed it to Ivy who grinned.
"You are Santa," she murmured.
Hagrid shook his head. "Not him. Jus' one a his little helpers."
Ivy laughed at the thought of anything about Hagrid being little, her fingers tracing along the box's golden edge.
"Are you gonna open it?"
Her smile got bigger as she tore into the paper, pulling off the lid to reveal a shiny silver necklace on a black velvet pillow. At the end of the necklace a silver hippogriff dangled, and for a moment Ivy wondered if Hagrid had somehow known how his kiss made her feel.
"It's beautiful!" she exclaimed, pulling it out of the box and allowing it to shimmer in the light.
"Tho't a you when I saw it. Som'thin' to remind ya... of Gingerfoot... And me."
"I could never forget you, Hagrid," she assured him. "That was a magical day. I'll never forget it as long as I live."
She stood up and rounded the table, planting a kiss on his cheek. "Thank you. It's perfect."
She held the necklace out to him, then turned around, holding up her braid and waiting for him to secure it around her neck. The giant fumbled with the silver catch for a minute, then draped the hippogriff around her neck.
"I can't get it, Ivy," he complained. "My fingers're too big..."
Ivy laughed and reached behind her. Her fingers found his, and then the latch at the end of the chain.
"It's not that hard, Hagrid," she insisted. "See... feel the latch. It's just there..."
But Hagrid found himself unable to concentrate on the tiny silver latch. He could not tear his gaze away from Ivy's creamy neck. He wanted to run his fingers across her skin, just to see if it was as soft as it looked, but he knew that if he did that, he'd get that swimmy feeling he'd gotten before, when he'd kissed her.
Red began to creep along his cheekbones, and he knew he'd have to put a little distance between himself and that ivory neck, if he was going to have any chance at all to save himself from feeling as though he'd mounted a hippogriff himself, then decided to slip off its back at ten thousand feet.
He pulled his fingers out of her grasp as though suddenly realizing he'd gotten them too close to a fire. Ivy latched the necklace in one simple motion, then turned around, smiling brightly. Her smile faded a little as she saw his face. He was pale, except for two spots of color high up on his cheekbones.
"Hagrid?" she asked. "Is something -"
The giant coughed loudly, then pulled a tablecloth-sized handkerchief out of his pocket. He brought it to his face, coughing into it once more. Raising a hand, he waved her off.
"Everythin's fine, Ivy," he sputtered. "Just got choked on a bit mead."
She stood before him for a minute, wondering just when he'd had time to take a drink, and thinking that he'd had a tankard of butterbeer, not mead. She was about to point that out when Rose strode to where the giant was seated.
"Don't you have something under that tree with his name on it?" she asked, resting a hand on Hagrid's shoulder. She shooed Ivy toward the tree. Hagrid's sigh of relief did not go unnoticed by Rose, whose eyes danced at the way he reacted to the closeness of her best friend.
"Feeling better, there, Hagrid?" she asked. The giant nodded into his hanky and she laughed, slapping him on the shoulder as they watched Ivy present her gifts.
"These are for you, Hagrid," Ivy said, beaming happily. She placed two wrapped packages and the box of chocolate truffles on the table in front of Hagrid.
"And these are for you, Rose." She walked behind Hagrid to Rose, embracing her warmly before handing over her gifts. Rose returned the embrace.
"Happy Christmas, Ivy," she said softly, brushing her thumb across Ivy's cheek. "You have no idea how glad I am that you're here."
Ivy felt tears prick the back of her eyelids. "If it's half as glad as I am to be here, maybe I do."
She watched her friends open their packages, hands wringing nervously. But both Rose and Hagrid seemed genuinely pleased with her choices. Rose changed into her new heels right away, then pinned the brooch to her collar. Hagrid got a little misty-eyed when he opened the dragon, but recovered quickly upon realizing that it actually moved when stroked.
"It's a Norwegian Ridgeback, Ivy," he told her. "Where ever did ya find it?"
Ivy smiled mischievously. "Can't tell you that. It's a secret."
"It's magic," Hagrid said.
Ivy took the seat across from him again, as the others began to sit down, his proclamation ringing pleasantly in her ears.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"This was the most perfect Christmas," Ivy stated, when the party was over, and she and Rose had finally gone to their beds.
"Oh I don't know, Ive. We had some great ones when we were little. Elana always made sure of that."
"Alright then, this was the most perfect Christmas since..." Ivy thought back for a minute. "Since I turned 11."
"Hagrid looked like he'd been hit by a freight train after you kissed him." Rose mentioned with a grin so wide Ivy could see a flash of white teeth in the dimness of the room.
"He kissed me..." Ivy protested. "And it was your mistletoe. You egged him on."
"Well, you're right about that. I egged him on. You two've only been staring at each other like moonstruck cows for days now."
Ivy giggled. "Moonstruck cows..." She thought about that for a moment, then turned to Rose. "He was very quiet after that. And had trouble looking me in the eye."
"You scared him... what's that phrase you always use? 'Out of his skin'."
"You can't scare a giant," Ivy laughed again. "They're fearless."
"Fearless except when it comes to pretty girls with sea-green eyes. Well, at least our particular giant. And he's really only half-giant, to be fair. Maybe it's the not-giant part of him that's scared out of his skin."
"Only half?" Ivy asked, surprised.
Rose thumped her in the head with a pillow. "Ivy, if he was 100% giant he'd be over twenty feet tall. He'd have to use our wash bucket for a tankard. And neither of us could serve him, because we couldn't drag it across the room."
Ivy laughed again at that thought. "I already get back aches dragging the one he uses back and forth. So was it his dad, or his mum who was... you know... little?"
"His dad. And you really should be asking him these questions. Not me."
Ivy sighed, and sank down further under her blankets. "He may not be back for a while, if he's scared out of his skin. He didn't kiss me good-bye. He just looked at me like he wanted to, then patted the top of my head and left. I'd rather have him as just a friend then run him off."
"You two have gotten close lately," Rose agreed.
"Because you're disappearing all the time." Ivy accused, and this time it was Rose's turn to get thumped with a pillow. "Will you ever be able to tell me what's going on?"
Rose sat up, her silhouette turning to Ivy in the darkness.
"It's Remus," she said simply. "He's got a... condition. And it's got to be kept under control if he's to keep his job at Hogwarts. I'm just... keeping an eye on him."
"For that Snape fellow?" Ivy asked with a shudder.
"Not for Snape, Ivy. For Remus. He's such a wonderful teacher. The kids need him, and he... he needs them as well."
"And Rose needs Remus," Ivy added gently.
Rose flopped back down on her bed, silent for a long time.
"He's got the soul of a poet," she managed, a little later. "And those beautiful eyes... soft and gray like... like goose down on winter's coldest day."
"You love him," Ivy stated.
"Just like you love Hagrid, hmmm?" Rose prodded.
That thought gave Ivy a jolt. "Is that what this is?" she questioned Rose. "Love?"
"How does it feel?" Rose asked, grinning.
"Like when I rode the hippogriff."
"Ivy, I never rode one of those. How does it feel?"
"When I see him I can't breathe," Ivy answered.
"That's love," Rose informed.
"And my head gets swimmy."
"That's it."
"And I want him to kiss me, but I'm a little afraid my heart'll pop if he does. Especially if he looks at me that way."
"What way?"
"Rose!"
"What way, Ivy? We've got to get to the bottom of this. It's very important."
"He looks as me like he's been searching for something for a really long time, and he thinks he may have found it in my eyes."
Ivy sat back, stunned. She'd never vocalized any of this. Not to Blackie, who knew everything. Not even to herself.
"Is that love, then Rosie?" she asked in a very small voice. It made her friend think of conversations they'd have when they were little. They'd always end with Rose assuring Ivy that everything would work itself out in the end. She sighed, and whispered her answer.
"I don't know, Ivy. I'm trying to figure that one out for myself."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
New Year's Eve came, and Remus felt well enough to join the party, this time, which made Rose come alive. She really was a striking beauty, and Ivy wasn't the only one who noticed that she saved all her dances for the Professor.
Hagrid showed up late, and already a bit tipsy, but Ivy didn't seem to notice. She did get to spend the moment when New Year's Eve turned to New Year's Day in his arms, and he kissed her, but it wasn't the same. The fire that had sparked between them at Christmas had gone out. Or been snuffed. Ivy couldn't quite tell which. They shared one dance, and Hagrid held her so tight she was afraid she might smother. She pressed her cheek against his chest and listened to his heart beat as the music played. One hand gripped his arm above the elbow, the other reached up higher, where her fingers played absently in the ends of his hair.
His heartbeat seemed erratic, beating slowly at times, then speeding up, only to stop for a moment that was long enough to make Ivy wonder if something physical was wrong with him. She resolved to memorize the sound, feeling as though it might be a long time before she'd hear it again. She got the feeling that he didn't find what he searched for when their eyes locked this time, for he left not long after their dance, muttering about dementors, and making sure his hippogriff was bedded down safe for the night.
Ivy left the party early, too, crawling in bed trying to figure out what was different about Hagrid. She fell asleep wondering, but somewhere in the wee hours of the morning it all came together in her mind, and she woke up with a start.
He Knows.
The thought rumbled through her mind like an ominous thunder cloud.
He felt it when he kissed me.
Her fingers touched her lips, wondering if indeed they'd somehow betrayed her. Her mind continued its tirade.
He knows you're not magic, and that's the end of it for you. 'Everything's better off with its own kind.' That's what he said, don't you remember?
Of course she remembered, but that was way back when they'd first met. Before Gingerfoot. Before he'd taught her to play cards or caught her feeding Blackie.
Pigs don't fly, Ivy. Hagrid is a wizard and you're not. He'll never love you. It's impossible. You're only...
You're only...
"Ivy?"
Rose's voice spoke from her side of the room.
"Ivy are you crying?"
"No," she lied feebly. "No, I'm fine. Go back to sleep."
Rose did as Ivy suggested. As for Ivy, she still lay wide away as dawn brightened the bedroom. It did nothing to brighten her heart.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Author's Note:
I just wanted to take a minute and say thanks for hangin' with the story this far!!
Any comments on making it better are greatly appreciated. You rock!! Now on to chapter 8........ :o)