The first two months of the new year made Hogsmeade as bleak on the outside as Ivy felt on the inside. Out of deference to Rose and Remus (who'd become quite a frequent visitor to the pub after the New Year's Eve party) she'd gone to feeding Blackie at their old meeting place, the craggy rock outcropping on the northeast edge of town. It was the same road down which she and Hagrid had dragged the Christmas tree, back when they'd been friends. For that's how Ivy'd begun to measure time since New Years Eve. Things that happened in her first year at Hogsmeade came under "When Hagrid Was Here." Anything after the first of January, by necessity fell under "Now That He's Gone."
Now That Hagrid Was Gone, Ivy spent a great deal of time on the rocks with Blackie. She couldn't get away daily, but she did her best to come often, and with as much of the pub's scraps as she could carry. Often the weather shortened her visits with her shaggy black companion, but even a little time with him seemed to ease her mind.
Blackie didn't care if Ivy had any magic or not. Ivy was convinced that he'd still come to her even if she stopped bringing hambones. He sat on the rocks with her because he enjoyed her company, and somehow, in his doggy way, he knew she needed him. And he was right.
More than once she wished he could speak to her, tell her where he'd been before Hogsmeade. She got the feeling that whoever had him before had been very uncaring, maybe even abusive. She'd caught a certain haunted look in his eyes every now and then, especially when he first bounded out of the forest to greet her. The look always faded quickly, but it saddened Ivy just the same.
"They say it's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all," she told him one warm spring morning. "Do you believe that, Blackie? Do you think I'm better off having known but lost my friend Hagrid? 'Cause lately I've been wondering if it might have been better for me to never have come here at all. I'd still have Rose's friendship. But not yours. And I'd have never met Remus. Or Zack Zonko. He's been hanging around the pub lately. And he's very sweet. But he's not... I mean... I'm not..."
She sighed and glanced toward the vulture tree, where half of the flock sat hunched on their branches, while the other half made lazy circles in the sky.
"He's not Hagrid and I'm not even remotely in love with him." she finished flatly. She looked at Blackie for a long time, drinking in the reassurance she saw in his eyes.
"I wish you could talk to me," she whispered, bending over to press her forehead against his. "Rose is busy tending to Remus, and Remus is... Remus has Hogwarts. And Hagrid hasn't been to the Three Broomsticks for months. Willa doesn't want to talk to me, so it's all down to you, Blackie. You're all I have left."
The dog let out a low, soft whine and wagged his tail, reaching up to lick her cheek repeatedly. Ivy laughed. The sound surprised her, and she realized that it had been a long time since she'd heard it. She wrapped her arms around the dog's neck for a minute and pulled him close. Moments later, he pulled away with a whine that turned into a yelp. He splashed one last doggy kiss across Ivy's nose, then dashed across the road and into the forest.
"Blackie!" Ivy called after him. She turned around to see what had scared him off, hoping it wasn't Remus or Rose. But whoever was approaching was coming from the woods, crashing through the woods. Ivy felt a cold tendril of fear snake itself around her heart. She clutched at her robe, afraid to run, and afraid not to. She glanced up at the vulture tree. Every bird in the flock had taken to wing. She turned her eyes back to the woods just in time to see Hagrid walking down the path. The fear that should have dissipated at the sight of him did not leave her, and realizing that nearly broke her heart.
"Ivy," he stopped short, just across the stream that ran parallel to the road out of Hogsmeade. "What'er you doin' way out here?"
Ivy shrugged, momentarily speechless. Hagrid was a mess. He'd been drinking (she could smell) and crying (she could see). His hair was beyond tangled, and as much as she wanted to run across the road to him, a cold whisper in her mind held her back.
He KNOWS, Ivy. He doesn't want you anymore.
But he needs... Before she knew it she'd taken a step forward, eyes blurred with tears.
"Hagrid... What's wrong?"
He grunted a little, then crossed the stream in one quick step. "It's Beaky," he said flatly. "They've made a decision. They're comin' to do it in a couple a weeks."
He continued past her, leaving her to stand alone in the middle of the street.
"Do what?" she asked, following along like a stray puppy. She reached out to put a hand on his arm and he shuddered.
"They're takin'... his... head," he said, bobbing his head as though he was having to explain something to a very small child. Or an idiot. He was staring at her hand on his arm, and she saw a funny look cross his features. A look of deepest sorrow, which was followed by one of contemptuous resignation. She'd seen that look before. And she dropped her hand when she realized just where.
It was the same look her father had given her when he'd handed her a one way ticket to Melbourne, Australia.
She took a step away from him, then another, and before she knew it, she was running. Running to the only place she had left to go, to Rose and the Three Broomsticks pub.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"What was that all about?" Remus asked, his eyes following Ivy as she rushed past them both and up the stairs to her room.
"I don't know," Rose murmured, rounding the bar to follow her. "But I reckon I'm going to find out." She mounted the stairs two at a time, then quietly entered the bedroom they shared.
"Ivy?" She whispered, crossing the room in two quick steps.
Ivy had thrown herself across her bed, and would not look up when Rose spoke her name. Her shoulders were shaking, and the sobs that came from her throat were like nothing Rose had heard since... since Ivy and her father had buried Elana.
Rose sat down beside her on the narrow bed. She stroked her friend's hair for a long moment, then called her name again.
"Ivy. What is it? What's going on?"
Ivy sat up and threw herself into Rosie's arms.
"I saw Hagrid on the road. Going to the Hog's Head. He said they're going to execute Buckbeak in a few weeks."
"And you're upset about the hippogriff?" Rose prodded gently.
Ivy shook her head. "No, Rose. He almost didn't stop to speak to me. And when he did he had this look on his face. I'll never forget it as long as I live. He knows I'm not magic. He must have found out at Christmas. He doesn't want to be anywhere near me. He loathes me, and I don't know what to do."
"Oh, Ivy," Rose said. "He can't know you're not magic. Nobody's told him. Maybe it's something else. Maybe he was just upset about Buckbeak. You know how he gets about his pets."
"No!" Ivy all but shouted. "He KNOWS. I saw it in his eyes. I thought he was my friend. I thought it wouldn't matter. But I was wrong. And if this is how he feels, and he was my friend... what would the others think if they knew?"
She turned her back on Rose and put her face in her hands. When she raised her head, Rose was shocked by what she saw. Ivy's face was livid. She looked as though she'd just been hit in the stomach with a boulder. Her usual neat braid had worked itself out on the long run back to the pub, and chestnut hair fell across her shoulders in a mass of tangles. The slack-jawed look on her face unnerved Rose for a minute.
"None of them would bother with me at all if they Knew, Rose. Zack Zonko would never come back. Remus Lupin would leave. The fact is, I'm living a lie here. And if my so-called friends knew the truth, you'd be the only one left. Pigs don't fly Rosmerta. Everything's better off with it's own kind. I should have stayed with the Muggles. That's where I belong."
"That's not true, Ivy," a masculine voice came from the bedroom doorway. Remus Lupin stepped boldly across the threshold, although his cheeks did redden a little at the thought of entering their bedroom.
"I've known about you since back in September when you were attacked by the dementor. I suspected before that. And I haven't deserted you. I don't know what's bothering Hagrid, but I don't think it has anything to do with magic. Or your lack of it."
Ivy turned a tear-stained face in his direction.
"You knew?" she asked skeptically. "Who told you?"
"Rose did." he said crossing the room to sit on Rose's bed, so he could face her.
"But before you go off on Rose, let me finish."
"Rose?" Ivy questioned pitifully, feeling as though she'd just been set adrift in the middle of a storm tossed ocean.
"Remus," Rose protested. "I did no such thing."
"You did, Rosie, you just don't remember. It was a very long time ago. Years ago. When your foster mother died, and Ivy left for Australia. I was a third year at Hogwarts and you..." He smiled a little at the memory.
"You were the prettiest waitress ever hired on at the Three Broomsticks."
He glanced at Ivy, who's curiosity was piqued.
"She was also the most lost and lonely person I'd ever met. I struck up conversation one day during a Hogsmeade Weekend. Do you remember yet, Rose? My friends dared me."
Rose gave him a ghost of a smile. "You told me I looked as though I'd just lost my best friend. And I told you that I had."
"And you told me about Ivy. And Elana. And all the happy years you had living with the Ollivanders."
"You were a great listener," Rose said, sighing softly. For a moment Ivy was forgotten, as Rose remembered when she'd first met Remus Lupin and his friends.
"You know how envious the others were when you decided to talk to me?" Lupin joked. "Peter Pettigrew kept begging me to introduce him. Even Sirius was envious..."
Lupin's eyes lost their focus for a long moment, then refocused. "I wasn't sure that Ivy was the girl you told me about at first, but I had my suspicions. And when she didn't see the dementor that attacked her, I knew for sure."
"You knew?" Ivy whispered.
"I put two and two together. I didn't get some sort of message out of the sky or anything. I spent lots of time at the pub back then, Ivy. Sometimes Rose read me your letters. Nothing personal," he assured as Ivy raised her eyebrows. "But they helped me get to know you a little. Enough so that when you showed up here, I truly wanted you to be happy."
"So it was you," Ivy muttered. "Back at Halloween when I almost spilled the stew on Percy Weasley. And the butterbeer on Professor Flitwick. That's what you meant when you said you'd come to see if I needed any help."
She gave him a long and searching look.
"As sick as you were that day. You came here to help me. To make sure that I wouldn't slip up and blow my cover. How can I ever thank you?"
"By believing in who you are, Ivy. Believe that the people who love you don't care if you have magic or not."
"That's not so easy," she whispered, turning her face away. She remembered that voice inside her that seemed only too content to remind her that what Remus said was impossible.
Pigs don't fly, Ivy
Remus reached for her hands and took them both in his. "The people who love you will love you no matter what," he repeated. "I've seen more proof of that in this lifetime than you would believe."
"You, Remus?" Ivy asked coldly. "You have no worries. What on earth could you have to hide? You're not leading some double life, fearful all the time that someone's going to find out and rat on you. And then they'll all turn away. You can't possibly make me believe that you know how this feels."
Remus Lupin laughed out loud. His laughter had a high, bitter sound to it that gave Ivy a chill.
"You don't think so?" he wondered. "Then maybe I should tell you a story. A tale about a little boy who was bitten by a werewolf. Do you know what happens to little boys who are bitten by werewolves... hmmm?" Remus sat on Rose's bed and ran a hand through his hair. "You don't have a corner on the secrets market, Ivy."
Ivy's head snapped up, and she looked in his eyes. Remus sounded as though he were telling the world's biggest joke, but the harsh edge in his voice revealed that the joke was on him.
"Do you know how many of Hogsmeade's finest would shun me if they knew what I am? Do you know how long my job would last up at Hogwarts if that particular secret got out? Do you know that one of my childhood enemies is now a colleague of mine, and would just as soon expose me as spit in my direction?"
"Professor Snape?" Ivy asked in a very small voice.
"Yes, Ivy, Professor Snape. Every month he brews up a Wolfsbane Potion, and I drink it and wonder if he accidentally left something out. On purpose. He had our third year students do an essay on werewolves while I was sick. In the hopes that someone would figure it out and let the wolf out of the bag. But I know who my friends are. Rose here has taken care of me, watched over me in her Animagus form to make sure nothing went wrong while I was under the influence of Snape's potion. Headmaster Dumbledore went to great lengths to hire me in the first place. You've got to learn to trust the ones you love most, Ivy. If they really love you, what you are won't matter. Only who."
He stood to his feet, rubbing a hand across his brow and walking back and forth across the room.
"I don't know what's eating Hagrid. But I'll try to find out. If that's what you want."
"I just want my old friend back," Ivy whispered. She rose to her feet and stood uncertainly before Lupin, then threw her arms around his neck.
"Thank you, Remus," she said. "For everything."
"Don't thank me, Ivy. This is what friends are for."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
But Remus never got to have his talk with Hagrid. Near the end of the school year he was exposed as a werewolf and resigned his professorship at Hogwarts. He spent the night before his departure at the Three Broomsticks. Rosmerta closed the pub early so she, Ivy and Remus could spend their last few hours together uninterrupted.
"I think this is all so ridiculous," Ivy said, sitting down after bringing a round of drinks to the table.
"Why can't Remus just stay here in Hogsmeade? He could work here with us, Rose. Or I could go work for Zack Zonko. He's offered more than once... Then Remus could work for you."
"I can't stay in Hogsmeade, Ivy. But it's nice to know you'd do all that for me."
"That's what friends are for, remember?" She took a long swallow of mead. Her face contorted in a grimace of distaste as she set the tankard down. "Should have stuck to butterbeer," she muttered.
"Rose," she continued. "Isn't there anything we can do?"
Rose wasn't saying much. She had opened a bottle of her best brandy and kept toying absently with the snifter. It occurred to Ivy that she looked as though she'd just lost her best friend.
"I don't know what to do," she whispered. "I wish I did."
"I'm not dead, you know," Remus chided, though the words had a hollow ring.
"I'll get settled somewhere. And then I'll come and visit."
"You promise?" Ivy asked.
"I swear it on my life."
Ivy stood to her feet then and picked up her tankard. "I'm getting rid of this nasty stuff," she told them, then she disappeared into the kitchen.
As soon as she was gone, Remus reached across the table and grasped Rose's hand.
"There's something I need to tell you," he started. This was the hardest part of leaving: saying goodbye. But he couldn't leave Hogsmeade with the most important things left unsaid. Rose had gone to great lengths for him during his stay at Hogwarts, and he was grateful. More than grateful. He opened his mouth to speak, but before he could choke out the words, a scream rang out from the kitchen.
Before he could stop it, a curse flew out of Lupin's mouth. He squeezed Rose's hand and stood up, bending over to kiss her lightly on the cheek.
"I'll go check on Ivy," he said. "You stay right there. I'll be back straight away."
He made his way into the kitchen, still cursing himself for forgetting such a very major detail.
Ivy was backing away from the doorway clutching her chest. Her eyes were huge with fright. When she saw Remus enter the kitchen, she ran to hide behind him.
"There's someone out there," she whispered. "I saw someone on the back step."
"I know, Ivy. I was supposed to get you prepared for this, but it slipped my mind. Rose has taken my leaving so hard."
"What does Rose have to do with the man I saw outside?" Ivy asked, her eyes narrowing slightly.
"Nothing, Ivy. That man outside is here to see you. And you don't have to be afraid to go out after dark, anymore. Dumbledore sent the dementors away. Come out here with me. I'd like you to meet an old friend."
"No!" Ivy whispered. "He doesn't look friendly. He looks... scary. Just like the picture of that man in the paper. The one escaped from Azkaban."
"So now you think he's scary, do you?" Lupin grinned. "You've been caring for him for months against my better judgment, and you weren't a bit afraid of him then."
"What are you talking about Remus? I never saw that man before in my life."
Remus shook his head in frustration, then took hold of Ivy's sleeve. "Just come outside and meet him. I promise he won't hurt you. As a matter of fact, I swear it."
She gave him a dubious look, but allowed him to lead her out onto the back step. The man she'd spied earlier was still there, looking a bit downcast, and toying with something silver that flashed in his hands.
"Sorry Sirius," Remus said sheepishly. "I forgot to tell Ivy you'd be coming by tonight. She got caught by surprise."
A ghost of a smile played on the man's lips. "So I heard."
"Ivy, may I present Sirius Black. I believe you know him as Blackie."
Ivy swayed against Lupin, who caught her deftly as she legs buckled.
"That's not Blackie, Remus," she said, her voice high, as though she was the last voice of reason in a sea of insanity. "Blackie is a dog. A big black shaggy dog who loves ham bones and..." she stepped forward and took a closer look at Sirius. "He's shaggy. And black. An he's a dog, Remus. Say he's a dog and you're playing a monstrous trick on me."
But something told her he wasn't. Something in Black's eyes broke through Ivy's unbelief. And something else caused her to legs to betray her one last time. This time Remus wasn't quick enough, and she ended up flat on her bottom on Rose's back step. She remembered where she'd heard the name Sirius Black. He was the one who'd escaped from Azkaban prison.
"Remus is telling the truth, Ivy. And I know it comes as a shock. I apologize for that. I would have told you myself, but you see, they've been after me. I couldn't show my face around here. Not this face, anyway."
"But you could show the face of a big black dog..." Ivy's voice trailed away. She studied him from her position on the step. He was gaunt, and fragile looking, as though one good gust of wind might topple him there in the street.
"Yes. As Blackie I was safe," Sirius continued. "At least as long as you were around. You took care of me for a long time, Ivy. I couldn't leave without saying thank you. And goodbye."
Remus gave him an encouraging nod, then disappeared, closing the door discreetly behind him. He didn't think it would be hard to entertain Rose long enough for his friend Black to say farewell to Ivy.
"And I hope you believe me when I say that I'm not guilty of those things they said I did. I'm not a murderer. Can you believe that, Ivy?"
The way he said those words made Ivy realize that it must be important to him that she did believe him. She watched, still shocked and numb to the core, as he sat down beside her.
"Blackie wasn't a murderer," she muttered. "He never once tried to hurt me. He was kind... and very gentlemanly. If you can say that about a dog."
Slowly another thought gained recognition in Ivy's overtaxed mind. She rubbed her brow with a hand. "If you are Blackie, then you know everything about me. I told you all my deepest secrets. You know I'm not magic..."
Sirius gave her an embarrassed smile. "My mind is a bit simpler when I'm in dog form, Ivy. I really don't remember everyth -"
"But you do!" Ivy stopped him. "I can see it in your eyes. I told you everything."
"You've nothing to be ashamed of." He put a hand on her knee, and Ivy couldn't help but think of the countless times Blackie's paw had rested in the very same place. "Really. And that's not even remotely why I'm here."
"Why are you here, then?" she asked.
"I wanted to give you this," he said, leaning over to give her the splash of silver he held in his hands.
"And to thank you for keeping me so well. I would have starved to death this winter, if it hadn't been for you."
Something cold and metal slid into her hand. She gasped as she opened her fist, revealing a silver bracelet in her palm. Two charms hung from its links. One was a shaggy dog. The other was a pig.
She laughed through sudden tears as she examined the bracelet. "A pig?"
"Try as he might, Remus couldn't find me a charm in the shape of a ham bone."
Ivy's hand flew to her mouth. "You really are... him."
"I'm sorry I had to trick you this way, Ivy. Dreadfully sorry." Awkwardly, as though out of practice, he wrapped his arms around her and held her tight for a long, silent moment.
"You and Harry mean more to me than anybody. I didn't want to deceive you. You've got to believe me. If you don't -"
"I do," she broke in. "I believe you, Blackie." He released her and she managed a grin. "I always wished you could talk. Remember?"
Sirius nodded. He took the bracelet from her and wrapped it around her wrist.
"Did you say you came to say good-bye?" Ivy asked, shaking her arm to admire the bracelet. Sirius ran his hand down her arm and his fingers linked with hers. He gave her hand a squeeze, and Ivy stared at their fingers laced together. No mess, no fireworks. Just her and Blackie, together. She squeezed his hand back.
"I have to go away, for now." he nodded. "I did come here with murder in my heart, Ivy. But something amazing happened to me yesterday. My godson Harry and some friends of his nearly cleared my name. And better than that, Harry told me he believes I'm innocent. So does Headmaster Dumbledore. I'm afraid it's not quite enough, though." He stopped, embarrassed by the non-stop flow of words that gushed from his mouth.
"It's a rather long story."
"I'd like to hear it," Ivy said simply. "I haven't even met your Harry. And after all the hours I talked your ear off..."
"Perhaps we could... ah... go for a walk?" Sirius asked. "I wouldn't ask, but I feel a little vulnerable sitting out in the open like this. The dementors are gone, but..."
"But what?" she asked, rising to her feet.
"If I'm captured they've been given permission by the Ministry of Magic to perform their most hidious of punishments. It's called the Dementor's Kiss."
"It sounds dreadful," Ivy shuddered, following him down the steps.
"It is dreadful," Sirius agreed. "It's their last and most extreme punishment. They steal your very soul right out of your body."
Ivy gasped, then ducked into the shadows.
"You're not scared to go for a walk in the dark?" Sirius asked, following close behind her.
"Not if you're with me. We can walk out to the vulture tree. I want to see..."
"If they're still around?"
Ivy nodded. It felt odd to be so comfortable around a stranger; like she'd known him forever, and they'd always been best friends. The strength of the bond between them was so strong that he could finish her thoughts.
"One thing first," Sirius said as they melted into the trees. He pulled her close and kissed her, soundly. "I know how you feel about Hagrid, but I want you to promise me something."
She nodded, wide-eyed and speechless.
"When my name is cleared, if he's still treating you badly, will you... I mean.. could you..?" he floundered for an awkward moment, then brought her hands to his lips, that ghost of a smile tugging on the corners of his mouth.
"Forget about him and..." Ivy couldn't finish for him this time. Finally, she whispered, "You already have part of my heart, Blackie. You always will."
He gave her a sad little laugh and drew her into his arms.
"Reckon that's more than I had when I first came to Hogsmeade."
Ivy was beginning to melt beneath his haunted gaze. "Maybe you shouldn't forget the way back, then." She searched his face, overwhelmed by the chain of events that had led her to this place in the shadows. Remus Lupin's old advice rang in her ears. "If someone really loves you, what you are won't matter. Only who."
Sirius stole an even greater part of her heart, as he bent to kiss her again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was nearly dawn when Ivy headed back toward the pub, eyes downcast and full of emotion. She'd never felt so happy and sad at one time. But then she'd never gained a friend and lost him all in the very same night.
She walked slowly toward the pub, glancing every now and then into the sky. For that's where she'd last seen Sirius riding away. On Hagrid's hippogriff, of all things. Buckbeak had been hidden in the woods not far from the vulture tree.
Ivy had approached with great respect, and when the fierce looking creature had given its permission, she'd stroked him reverently. She didn't know how he'd managed to escape the executioner's ax, but she was overjoyed that he had. And suddenly the hippogriff pendant around her neck became a greater treasure still.
Now Blackie was gone, though. Disappearing into the predawn darkness and Ivy's life at the same time. She knew that Remus would soon be gone as well.
Dwelling on lost friends, Ivy didn't notice Hagrid fall in step with her for nearly half a block, but when she did, she stopped in her tracks.
He stopped beside her, saluting her with a big brown bottle.
"Ivy! Ha' ya heard the news? Beaky escaped. They come to take off his head an' he was there. Nex' minute he was gone. Nobody's seen him all night."
Ivy gave the giant a funny little smile.
"That is good news Hagrid." She resumed her walking, and he followed. She wondered how long it would be until he wondered what she was doing out so late. Or early. Hagrid seemed content to walk and not ask questions.
When they came to the pub's back step, Ivy sat down.
"Want to sit a while?" she asked hopefully.
The giant grunted and sat down beside her. He reeked of whatever he'd been drinking out of the bottle at his side. He must have caught her looking at it, because he gave her a sheepish grin.
"I bin celebratin' Beaky's escape."
Ivy smiled. "I'm glad he got away. More than you'll ever know, Hagrid." Her fingers grasped the silver hippogriff around her neck.
"I bin meanin' to stop by an' talk to ya," the giant said, fervently studying the toe of his boot. "I treated ya bad las' time I saw ya. Twern't right, avoidin' ya like I have, an I'm sorry."
"We have been missing you around here," Ivy admitted. "Wondering if you'd be coming back."
"I'll be back, Ivy. Jus' bin a bloody coward, is all."
"You? A coward?" she asked, wondering if whatever he was afraid of had only been chased away temporarily by the swill in his bottle. "I just figured you'd gotten tired of me beating you at cards."
Hagrid buried his face in his hands and rubbed vigorously. Ivy's hand went to his shoulder of its own free will. They sat and watched the sun come up together, neither one speaking, both of them searching the sky for a hippogriff they hoped they wouldn't see.