Disclaimer:All of the characters, etc belong to JK Rowling. This poem is written in the style of Clement Clarke Moore's "'Twas the Night Before Christmas". Therefore, the structure and certain slight phrasing were used for the purpose of the parody. No copyright infringement is intended, and I do not make any money off this poem.

A/N:This poem may not be copied, dowloaded, distributed or used, in whole or in part, for anything other than personal use unless given consent by the author.



'Twas Nighttime at Hogwarts

'Twas nighttime at Hogwarts, when all through the tower,
Some paintings were stirring, naught else at this hour.
The prank had been planned by four First Years with care
In hopes that great merriment soon would be theirs!

The students were sleeping, all looking serene,
While throughout the castle the boys crept unseen;
And Filch with his lantern now started his rounds,
To make sure no students were up out of bounds.

When up a few floors there came such a loud SMASH!
Filch sprang into action, then heard a new CRASH!
Away down the corridor he flew towards the sound,
Tore open the door and looked wildly around.

Light through the windows of the classroom had shown
Two broken objects he thought Peeves might have thrown,
When, what to his astonishing eyes should appear,
But a glowing red sign: "The Marauders Were Here!"

With an odd little shiver that made him quite sick,
Filch knew in a moment there was more to this trick.
Down from the ceiling slugs started to rain,
And Filch yelled, and shouted, and called out foul names!

"Merlin's Beard! You Mudbloods! you Nitwits! and Noodles!
You Dastards! you Dunderheads! you Sons of Poodles!.
If you are still here, then you sure have some gall!
You'd better make sure I don't find you at all!"

Now James, in a wig that had hidden his face,
Zapped a desk next to Filch so that he would give chase.
As James ran from Filch, in the dungeons below
The others kept watch on a different foe.

'Twas revenge! for Remus had last month been nailed
With detention because of a prank that had failed
And Snape was the one who had turned Remus in,
And was now determined to thwart them again.

So, Peter "let slip" they would meet there that night
And three of them waited now just out of sight.
Snape went to that spot, having swallowed the bait
And when James joined the others, Black ended the wait.

His eyes - how they twinkled - a raspberry he blew,
Then bent over and showed a different view.
Snape's thin little mouth was now forming a hex -
He'd soon show Sirius he was no one to vex!

Around a corner Sirius ran very carefully,
And slipped under the cloak so no one would see.
Snape rounded the corner now, "Limacum Moles!" he cursed,
Knowing that Sirius would hate this the worst.

He was buried in slugs from his feet to his eyes --
Only it wasn't Sirius that Snape caught by surprise!
Filch squished his way out, and grabbing Snape he said:
"Well, what do you know? Here's the one out of bed!"

The four spoke not a word, but went straight to their room,
And laughed themselves silly, pondering Snape's doom.
They hoped he received Extra Special Detention,
Like scrubbing bedpans under Filch's attention.

James put away his cloak, and they gave a cheer,
Then all settled down for the morning was near.
But they heard Remus say as they drifted off to sleep:
"I have got to learn how to curse a slug-heap!"







10/01/02