Kristina left the baseball game early. She was never much of a fan. She wasn't much of anything now. Peter's eyes were...so hurt with misunderstanding. She thought for sure he could understand what she meant...
Apparently not. Maybe she hadn't thought this through completely. What kind of person could ask for someone else to stay away from them and not expect them to be upset. What else did she have now?
Fear and remorse.
She actually loved him, but he didn't know and would not know. He could always put two and two together, but after this, he couldn't faith in anything anymore.
A week and a half later, school started. Peter and Kristina had only two classes together. When Peter walked in, his eyes automatically made their way to Kristina. Her back was to him, her head forward. She was sitting in her seat, not talking to anyone unlike the other students. Swiping some lint off of her black stretch pants, she glanced around the room. There were some familiar faces, but other than that, every thing else was new. From the looks of it, she hadn't seen him because she hadn't turned her head completely around.
His eyes stayed on her for a moment longer before he mentally reprimanded himself. He didn't care about her. What she did was of no concern of his. She wasn't his problem anymore...
And then...he asked for forgiveness for lying like that. Denial was such a blessing, but a curse also. Smoothing out his jeans, he sat in the seat closest to him. He pulled out his blue binder and gave a deep sigh. If things were going to be like this, it was going to be a hell of a year. His blue eyes found their way upward again and back onto her. Her head was leaning to the side, laying peacefully on her palm while part of her dark, somewhat curly tendrils went through some of her fingers. He couldn't completely see her face, only the sides. There was nothing peaceful about her face. It was stern, wistful and-
He shook his head at himself. He was torturing himself if he kept looking at her like that. He felt like an idiot to be looking at her like that...it was stupidity. He, for one, was not about to wallow in self misery. His shoulders slumped in anger. Silly him...he was already there.
Kristi sat in her desk ignoring the murmurs of other students and their conversations. She had her pen on her paper, letting it run wild across her paper while she held her head with her hand. She felt like crap... Nothing was good in her life. Well, the people hadn't done anything else to her. Peter never called her, she didn't call him. She didn't know what classes he had taken, but she was sure she would see him in at least one...that's just how things went.
When class let out, it was the first time she had seen Peter. He had on his navy blue windbreaker with a simple white shirt under it that tucked into his loose stone wash jeans. His face seemed vacant, almost as though he wasn't really there. She had mailed his gift to him the Thursday before and knew that he should have gotten it by now. Biting a fingernail as she walked toward the exit, she made a quick decision to ask him. It wouldn't hurt to ask him a question, right? The game was tonight against Maryland. Taking a deep breath, she attempted to catch up with him.
Peter walked outside quickly, his shoes squishing against the moist ground. Mikala volunteered to pick him up. It was his last class of the day and all he wanted to do was leave.
Spotting Mikala on a nearby bench, he jogged toward her.
Kristi was almost near him when she stopped in her tracks. There he was, helping a very beautiful blond off of the park bench, laughing at something she said. Her heart immediately sank when she saw this. Gritting her teeth and holding up her head, she began to walk toward him once more.
"Well that doesn't happen every day," Peter said with a small smile. His time with Mikala increased to more than just a working thing. She was filling the void. For once, he actually prided himself in being able to jump to someone else so quickly, even if he was acting like a womanizer.
Mikala chuckled in that cat like voice. "No it doesn't. But c'mon! What kind of guy just pulls his car out like that!" She chuckled once more as she slipped a hand around his back. Peter's body stiffened from the touch, as though he had just gotten dirt thrown on him. He stuck it out though.
He adjusted his book bag, but soon heard a small object land on the stony path. Picking up his pen, he saw Kristi making her way toward him very slowly, as though she was debating on whether to come by him or not. He picked up his pen and allowed Mikala to place her arm back where it was. He heard a faint call of his name, but swiftly ignored it.
"Peter!" Kristi said a voice a little below the sound of a shout. He didn't want to hear her. She didn't care...he was still mad at her because of this whole mess, but she at least wanted to know if he got his birthday gift from her.
Mikala swung her head in an attempt to get some hair from her face. "So are you going to that game tonight, or what?"
Peter shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. In a tired voice he said kind of loudly, "Nope...didn't particularly want to, so I gave the tickets away." He had gotten Kristina's huge card in the mail with the signatures on them along with the two tickets. The card said for him to use the tickets "however you want to". Just like what was said at the baseball game...he wanted nothing from her. So, he gave the tickets away to some kids he saw on the street.
Mikala eyed him strangely. "How'd you get the tickets?"
"Oh, they were a gift."
"From who?"
He shrugged his shoulders once more. "Just someone." He knew the conversation was loud enough for her to hear...As soon as he said the words, "just someone" he felt remorse. He wasn't mad. He wanted to punish her for not believing that he could handle his own while staying with her. He was to the point where he didn't know what he was saying; he couldn't believe what he was saying. It didn't sound like him. He was no longer Peter Parker, but the shell of a bitter man had lost his girl...
Kristina walked at her normal speed from then on, diagonal to Peter and Mikala. Well...it's always good to know when your gift is appreciated. She adjusted her Jan Sport book bag and walked away. She never in a million years wanted them to be like this. She never wanted them to truly break up...
Peter had already moved onto someone else. So this was it; it was over...
The next two weeks were rough for both of them. Peter felt guilt every time he saw Kristina. In his head, he saw himself as a bastard. After a few times of reviewing the conversation he had with her at the game, he could understand. He really did, but something lingered in his head that she was hinting at something. All the time she mentioned that Spider-Man could fight and that there could be her and Spider-Man...they were one in the same! His pride puffed up that it was for romantic interest...that she fell for his web slinging alter ego.
Then his heart would jump in. She fell for him long before she knew who he was. He often smiled to himself at the memory of how she told him...
It didn't matter now. He knew he made things worse with her because of the tickets. And then Mikala! If leading people on was an Olympic sport, he would most definitely get the gold. They would go to the movies, out for coffee, to the park, or even on assignment. She would move in to kiss him, but he would always push her away gently. When she would reach for his hand to hold, he would stuff his hands in his pockets. He would always look to her for any sign of disappointment or anger, but there was never any. He still didn't feel comfortable around her. He felt as though she was a wolf in sheep clothing.
Kristina was sitting in CC's for the fourth time that week and it was only Tuesday. Her coffee tastes changed: all black, no sugar, no cream, nothing….just like what she had. She stared into the big green mug full of thoughts. She hadn't moved on...she felt loyal to him even though he obviously didn't feel it toward her. The stupid India Arie song playing now that she loved before, was now a constant reminder of what she lost.
Now that you're right here,
Let me whisper in your ear
Now that you're listening,
Let me tell you how I feel
I've been trying to formulate
The perfect words the perfect way
I can't hold it back no more
I gotta let you know today
Its...
She growled at the crooning. Her head was full of doubts it seemed. She hadn't "seen" Peter in almost four weeks and her powers had not returned. Oh sure, they had class together, but her eyes stopped seeing him after the third day. She was in and out of her classes before her dead eyes could even scan the room for him. He always sat in the back somewhere, and her in the front, so that helped. She was well over whatever bug she had, but she felt like crap. Feeling like crap for almost a month is a very long time. Had she done the right thing?
Peter Parker's life was somewhat safe. Spider Man's was kept under wraps, but an unknown enemy exploited her's. So was she right to do what she did?
Simple (What more can I say)
So Simple
I Love you (What more can I say)
Simple (What more can I say)
So Simple
I Love you (What more can I say)
Pushing Peter away may have been the stupidest thing emotionally to do, but her head brought her some solace…
Mikala walked in to CC's with Peter on her arm, smiling brightly. She had actually grown to like the little Boy Scout but he was still so reluctant to her. He hadn't given himself to her, he hadn't even kissed her, but oh how she thrived for the challenge. She kissed him twice, but he always pushed her away; she gripped him, he never touched her except to remove her hands from him. What was odd was that he kept inviting her to do things with him. She knew about his little hang-up with his girlfriend. She thought it was hilarious, but never let him know that.
Damn boss man kept pestering her to get in his pants. She couldn't deny that she was getting restless from his resistance, even though he was free. Peter had told her a some what different version from what she figured had really gone down: they had differences, so they broke up. It was really cryptic...
But boss man...he was starting to get impatient from what she could see. She knew that if she could nail Peter, in more than one way, there would be no way he'd go back to Kristi. Absolutely no freaking way. Oh well...her charms weren't working, so...it was time to move to the bigger guns...
Peter threw himself into his work and into going out with Mikala. He wasn't being fair to her and he knew it. He was using her to get past his thing with Kristi. He began to think more and more about the things she said. He would have done the same thing most likely, but he just wouldn't bring himself to admit it. He felt as though he'd be abandoning her. Funny, he felt like that now. He hadn't seen her face in those weeks. He knew she was okay because she would come out as Black Rose. They had only two classes together, but no acknowledgement was made. It was to the point where he didn't see her anymore, she was just a memory. This is why he felt he had abandoned her.
Then he saw her…
Now that you're listening let me tell you what I need
Now that your holding me let me show you what I mean
I've been trying to analyze
just what it is I feel inside my heart
But now I realize it don't have to be so hard
Cause it's...
What he wouldn't have done to just kiss her, touch her, hold her against him, anything. Then his pride puffed up. 'She pushed you away…remember that,' it would tell him. He was almost to the point of not caring what his stupid pride said, he hurt too much. Perhaps if he went to her-
Simple (What more can I say)
So Simple
I Love you (What more can I say)
Simple (What more can I say)
So Simple
I Love you (What more can I say)
No, that was out of the question. She would shoot him down once more no doubt and besides, he was there with Mikala. What would he do, walk up to her with Mikala grinning on his arm and say, "Who cares about a damn psycho, stay with me anyway?" Oh yeah, that would definitely get her running back to him.
That stupid song was helping either. He was ready to throw himself at her to get her to listen to him...to get her to realize what a mistake this is, what a mistake he had made, but pride is a strong emotion...too strong.
Kristi hadn't seen him, so there was no point in letting her know he was here. "Um, Mikala, let's sit over here," he said while pointing to a booth that was on the other side of the room away from Kristi's.
Mikala looked at him funnily. "Why? There's no window over there. All the windows are over there." She tugged at his sleeve as she balanced holding her iced mocha in her right hand. "C'mon Parker."
Once the power is for real
And I gonna say it again
And again
Kristi got up with her receipt. There was nothing more she wanted with the shop. She had spent most of her time in there, but wasn't as though she had somewhere to go. She just needed to be within the walls of her own home. It was that simple.
Picking up her book bag, she proceeded to head toward the register. Just as luck would have it, Mikala took a swift turn to the left as she began to lead Peter to another booth. Mikala bumped straight into Kristi and her iced mocha spewed everywhere, straight onto Kristi. Kristi just stared at her newly tanned gray shirt.
Mikala scoffed at her irately. "Why don't you watch where you're going!"
Kristi was about to shoot a comment toward her when he heard a voice behind the angry woman. "C'mon Mikala, forget it."
Kristi jumped in. "Oh no...let me buy you another one."
Peter's tugging stopped instantly. Of all people...of all FREAKING PEOPLE! The fates really did have a sense of humor. Well...maybe he could put this to his advantage. "That's not necessary," he said while stepping between the two. His eyes stared her's down for some sort of reassurance, for some sort of hope.
I Love you
"Um yeah... I think it is necessary. It's not like there's a shortage or anything. The people here practically GIVE AWAY these things," Kristi said with sarcasm. Peter visibly shrunk away when he heard the bite of the words to his ears.
I Love you
Never once did she take her eyes off of Peter's. What she saw surprised her. He looked miserable. His facial lines were distressed and his eyes lingered on her as if trying to send her a message. Kristi didn't want to start anything so numbly she pulled out a five dollar bill. "Here. Would you please move?"
I Love you
Mikala rolled her eyes at Kristi in disgust. Kristi stepped between Mikala and Peter in order to get to the register. Peter just watched her numbly, not saying a word. He was too taken back by everything. He saw her regret in the words she said.
Mikala, oblivious to the relationship, watched Kristi walk off to the register. "God, I cannot stand little ingrates like that! Walking's not that hard to master..."
I Love you
Kristi's ears perked up when she heard this. She didn't care about the insults...all she wondered about was what was going to be said in response of them. She heard nothing. Paying for her coffee, she walked out of the store and her jaw clenched.
I Love you
Peter watched her form as it slumped out of the café. He wanted to smack Mikala and run to Kristi. Yeah...He shook his head quickly. He never had thoughts of hitting women before, but Mikala was a two faced bitch...
I Love you
But who was he to call anyone two-faced. He just watched and listened to someone call the person he loved an ingrate. He did nothing...
Now you know how I feel
Tell me what are you gonna do
Now that I've said the words
Tell me what do you have to lose
I know that you feel it too
I can see it when I look into your eyes
You're scared, but you don't have to be
It's alright cause it's
Peter grabbed his head quickly as if he was in pain. "Mikala..."
She was on her way to the register to order another iced mocha. Turning her head to him, she said lazily, "What?" She looked at his pained expression. "What's wrong with you Parker?"
He gritted his teeth and said in a venomous whisper, "Don't you have any respect for anyone? At all!"
She was taken back by his words. "What are you talking about?"
"Do you really treat people like that normally...seriously, do you?"
She rolled her green eyes at him. "Parker please, she was just a little-"
His blue eyes narrowed in to slits. "Don't you dare call her a nobody."
Simple (What more can I say)
So Simple
I Love you (What more can I say)
Simple (What more can I say)
So Simple
I Love you (What more can I say)
Mikala looked at Peter's flaming blue eyes. My God...he was serious. "Look...I just got really pissed okay? I need caffeine or else I snap." She rolled her eyes at this. "C'mon, this arguing is pointless. Why don't we go back to my place? I've got better stuff there than coffee. C'mon..." she said with a small smirk. Well...maybe it was about time to shell out that extra artillery...
Mikala escorted Peter to her Celica and started up the car. Oh yes...this night would certainly prove to be interesting...
It started out just like any normal thing:a friend inviting another friend inside and offering them a drink. Peter didn't know it, but he had a little something extra added to his coke...
Mikala mixed in some sort of alcohol into Peter's drink. He was acting really anal since that thing in the cafe. She didn't know why...she didn't want to know why. All she knew was that she had to make amends with him quickly.
After a few minutes of silence, Mikala finally spoke up. "You know Parker, you really are quite the guy."
Peter's mind was on Kristi. Dumbly he said, "Huh?"
Mikala smiled. "You are. You are very handsome and intelligent. Why anyone would let you go is far beyond me."
It wasn't too far beyond him... He gave a shaky smile her way. He didn't like where this was heading. Innocent compliments are great, but just about nothing was innocent when it comes to Mikala. Nodding his head slowly, he said with an unsure voice, "Um...thanks?"
"You know Parker...I would be happy to fill that void for you." She scooted closer to him.
He in turn, scooted away. "That's okay. I think I'll manage."
She turned her head to the side as she ran a finger across his cheek. "Oh but a guy like you should never be alone...Don't you ever get lonely?"
Turning his head from her, he answered truthfully. "Sometimes."
She scooted closer to him. "Well then...let me help you get past that."
Peter's blinking cause him to miss Mikala's reflexes in action. In .6 seconds, she was already on him attempting to assault his lips with her own. Peter pushed Mikala as gently and roughly as he could off of him."Mikala slow it down."
She fell back onto the sofa with a grunt. "But w-why? I know you want me."
He shook his head as he pushed himself up. He had to get out of there. He didn't know what exactly was her problem or why his head felt light, but he knew he shouldn't be there. Mikala on the other hand, did not give up so easily. She reached her hands out and pulled at him. Shrugging her hands off he said sternly. "Mikala stop it."
She hopped off of the sofa quickly and whirled him around so he would look at her. "Look at my eyes. You want me."
Peter narrowed his eyes at her. What was she doing? "No I don't."
Mikala concentrated harder. Hopefully the alcohol would loosen him up some. "Who do you want Peter...you want me like I want you. Say it back to me," she said with a growl.
Peter turned his head to the side with confused features all over his face. "But I don't."
She pursed her lips together and reached for him. "Who do you want Peter?
He snatched his arm from her grip, receiving a scratch from her. "Mikala, would you quit this? You're freaking me out."
"Peter...just give in already..."
What was wrong with her! He gripped her roaming hands and pushed her down onto the sofa. "Mikala stop it!" he said in a rough tone.
She dropped her jaw as soon as the realization hit that he pushed her away from him. With wide eyes, she looked like she was about to cry. "God Parker when did you become so violent?"
Peter realized what he had just done. He couldn't help it; she's acting like a dog in heat! Still, that was no excuse. He ran his hand through his hair. Okay...he'd apologize and hightail it out of there. Extending a hand, he said softly, "I'm sorry, but I…" She pulled him down onto the sofa and straddled his hips. He pushed at her once more. "Stop it!" And people say that raping a guy wasn't possible!
She pinned his arms down and stared at him deeply. "You will listen to me…"
He felt a small tickle in the back of his mind...he felt that sometime before. But where from? "Wait a second."
She widened her eyes once more, going at full force now. "Stop fighting it!"
He felt a strong sensation tugging at his mind. Then suddenly it hit him. "Klefton."
Klefton? Boss man used that turn before...Shaking her head quickly, she said, "No."
Peter pushed her off of him finally and pinned her down on the sofa. "Your eyes. You have Klefton's eyes. You work for him!" Jesus...these people are everywhere! Gripping her wrists tightly, he demanded, "Who is it?"
Mikala was starting to get nervous. This guy would get really pissed if he found out the entire story..."You will stop asking questions."
Yep...it was Kelfton's eyes alright. Smirking at her, he said confidently, "No...you will answer my questions." Mikala closed her eyes for a moment. There wasn't a way to get out of this one. Peter looked at her shut eyes and saw defeat wash over her face. He lowered his tone to something above a whisper. "Why are you doing this?" She remained silent. "You better tell me."
"Or else what?" Peter's eyebrow rose. Behind those blue eyes was a fire unlike anything she had ever seen before. The boy scout was long gone now..."Okay, I don't know his name, but this is all I know….."
Peter spent thirty minutes listening to her explanation. It sounded plausible considering what these people had done before but now...it just sounded crazy. She was sent to stir up doubt between he and his girlfriend from reasons unknown to her. All she knew was that she was getting paid for it. She had to keep them apart and so far, she had done a good job. Though, she was warned that she would push him away...so that made it easier. From what he could gather, Mikala knew nothing about their identities, but the "boss man" as she called him obviously had to have known. It was too far fetched to think that this guy goes around breaking up couples just for fun...
Could he go back to Kristi? He treated her horribly when she was trying to protect him. Little did she know, it was all the plot. They played her like a pawn. Her and him both. It was storming when he got to his apartment. He went to his room and sat down on his bed. His radio was on, but he could barely hear the music. He looked at his pictures that were on his dresser. His eyes fell to the one picture that face down. Slowly, he set it back up It was the one from spring break. Kristina made a copy and gave him one. He loved that picture….her eyes. He loved her eyes.
There's something about the look in your eyes
Something I noticed when the light was just right
It reminded me twice that I was alive
And it reminded me that you're so worth the fight
Then he thought about the hurt he saw in her eyes when he saw her at the coffee shop. For a moment he thought she would throw her coffee on him. But of course she didn't and wouldn't, after all, why should she waste her coffee on someone like him.
She pushed him away, like he had done to M.J. for her own good.
My biggest fear will be the rescue of me
Strange how it turns out that way,
yeah
Could you show me dear?
Something I'm not seeing
Something infinitely interesting…
She had shown him so many things it seemed.
He thought back to spring break, how they slow danced together. He thought about the many times they slow danced together, barefoot in her apartment, in his apartment, in the park…they were probably the happiest when they were in each other's arms.
There's something about
The way you move
I see your mouth in slow motion
When you sing
More subtle than something
Someone contrives
Your movements echo that
I have seen the real thing
She was so scared of him being hurt, she didn't stop to realize how everything fit together too perfectly….
Your biggest fear will be
The rescue of you
Would she believe him if he talked to her, if he told her what he had found out? He had to show her every thing….
Strange how it turns out
That way, yeah
Could you show me dear?
Something I'm not seeing
Something infinitely interesting…
He had to show her….his love.
...
Back to you
Kristi walked out of her bathroom with a blue towel around her head and a blue robe around her frame. She stepped to her dresser to grab her black comb.
It always comes around
Back to you
Tonight…she hadn't realized how much she had missed Peter. It was amazing what a little jealousy could do. He moved onto Mikala. She had never wanted them to be truly separated, but only until this whole mess could be cleared. Unfortunately, he couldn't understand and she didn't blame him. She tossed the towel to the side and passed her comb through her dark hair….
I tried to forget you
I tried to stay away
But it's too late
Her French doors were opened and she felt the cool pre-fall breeze pass through the room. It was raining outside, but she often left her doors cracked.. Dampness outside only brought down her spirits just like the water droplets that were falling so carelessly outside. There was nothing more for her to do now. Fixing her hair into a wet ponytail, she discarded her robe, her body being covered in only a sports bra and boxers, and climbed into her bed.
Besides the sound the rain on the pavement of her balcony. Was she wrong to push him away? The way things looked, they knew each other from glances, nothing more. Lord knew she wanted it to be more.
Her mind was becoming selfish again…her practical side reasoned that if she really cared about him, she wouldn't even consider thoughts of him coming for her, but her much more emotional side was breaking the surface. Her body began to drift off into sleep. If only she could keep everything submersed…
Over you
I'm never over
Over you
Peter sat on a roof top across from Kristi's apartment building. The rain, saturating his jeans and blue Nautica shirt. The rain was blurring his vision as he sat there attempting to get his thoughts together. He knew what needed to be said, but he wasn't too sure on how to say it. Hopefully, he would just open his mouth and everything would come out.
He crept into her room through her open double doors. His wet Nike sandals padded across the wooden floor. Peter's eyes shifted across the dim room looking for movement. His eyes fell on her bed. Between the curtains, he could make out the form of a body. He walked over slowly...
Something about you
It's just the way you move
Peter pulled the sheer curtain back to reveal Kristi hugging a pillow, her knees tucked in and her body turned toward the side. His entire body nearly fell at the sight. He kneeled to one knee and placed his head near her's. Reaching a hand up, he slowly began to stroke her cheek. He wasn't sure that he wanted to wake her, but he wasn't sure if this was really something that should wait.
He placed his lips on her forehead before pulling back to watch her face. Her mouth twitched slightly, forming a small smile. He touched her cheek once more, this time, her eyes fluttered open slowly. Peeking through her eyelids, she stared at him for a moment. "Kris..."
His picture didn't register until she heard his voice. Still sluggish from sleep, she shut her eyes and shook her head to the side. "What are you doing?
There was almost a harsh tone in her voice. Quietly, he said, "I needed to see you."
The way you move me
Why...he's got a new girl on his arm, so what was the big deal? They'd been through something like this before. He didn't need to explain his actions to her...she didn't care. Not caring made everything not as hard to swallow. Didn't mean it didn't make her sick to her stomach though...
Swallowing, she asked softly, "How did you get in here?"
He nodded his wet head toward the door. "The balcony.
She sat up slowly in her bed, her sheets falling from her chest. Squinting her eyes to see him, she saw him drop his head quickly when the sheet fell. She almost smiled at his subtle action. Softly, she said, "Someone could have seen you." She turned her head sluggishly to the balcony doors and with the whisk of her hand, she shut them slowly. She scooted her knees up and held them with her arms. "Why didn't you come as Spider-Man?"
"Because I'm speaking to you as me, not Spider-Man, not in a mask," he said with a slightly irate voice. His breath was coming in hard as he tried to speak. "I need to talk to you."
I'm so good at forgetting
And I quit every game I play
Her head was down as she looked at her silk threads. "What did you want to talk about?"
But forgive me, love
I can't turn and walk away
His tone was calm. "Us undoubtedly."
Back to you
It always comes around
Back to you
She couldn't stop herself from scoffing. "What exactly is there for us to talk about Pete?"
"Please Kris..." She was mad at him. He did somewhat flaunt Mikala at her, but it was so important that just this one time, she listened to him. He placed his hand on her face, shifting her head so she would look down at him.
I walk with your shadow
I'm sleeping in my bed
With your silhouette…
He stared at her brown eyes that seemed interested, but saddened. Those brown eyes...those same eyes that he had grown to love, the same ones that made him smile during Spring Break. They were so happy at one point in time...now they had nothing.
Yeah...Should have smiled in that picture
If it's the last that I'll see of you
Her brown eyes stared at his blue ones. They were filled with so much remorse and hope. She couldn't bear to send him away again. She had always hoped for this, but wasn't sure if she was ready to accept it. She shook her head at him slowly. "Peter, I don't think-"
It's the least that you
Could not do
He held a hand to her mouth. "Listen to me." He swallowed hard trying to surface the feelings he had kept hidden for those weeks. "I think about you. I think about you all the time. The first time I had actually looked at your face was tonight at the coffee shop." He turned his body from her and leaned his back against her bed. His arms on his knees he continued. "I got the notion in my head that you didn't want me at all. I played the conversation over in my head...about how you kept mentioning Spider-Man. I felt as though you forgot that was who I am, that we are one in the same. Whenever I would see you in class it seemed as though this whole thing was because what you feel is not for me, but….my alter ego."
"Never Peter."
"I know. I didn't understand everything you said to me, I didn't want to understand. I needed a new way of thinking things." He chuckled to himself. "It's a lot easier if you don't accept things the way they are given to you, but make them be seen in a different way." He went silent for a moment in an attempt to collect all of his thoughts.
He turned around once more on his knees to face Kristi. With a stern voice, he said, "Mikala means nothing to me. She never has and never will." He grabbed her hands before starting again. "I never touched her. I probably indulged more than I should have just by going on what I don't even think can be called dates. She would kiss me, but I would push her away."
"What you do is none of my business Peter."
"I'm making it your business." His head fell to concentrate on her sheet. "That whole time and as of right now, I feel empty, and..." he looked up place emphasis on his eyes, "I'm willing to fight, head on, but I can't do it alone."
Leave the light on
I'll never give up on you
Leave the light on
She turned her head from him faintly. "I told you Peter..."
For me too…
He still held her hands as he placed his face as close to her's as he could. His eyes began to plead with her. "Tell me you've missed me, please? Just tell me Kris…please."
For me too…
She turned her eyes to his. All defenses crumpled. "All the time."
For me too...
He placed a hand on her cheek and began to caress it slowly. "Why can't you see this? You're fighting so hard not to be controlled, its already being done."
Kristi snapped from her reverie of his eyes quickly. Jerking her head away from his touch, she said quickly, "No Peter."
"Whoever this is wanted and wants us separated. He put fear into us…he had to. What better way is there to controlling something than by breaking down the internal structure. Us, being together, is that structure. " It did make sense, but that couldn't be done if they didn't know who both of them were.
"How do you know this? They don't know who-"
"They've been knowing."
Her head perked up. "What?
"They've known. This was a set up. That doctor was sent to you, Mikala was sent to me. It was all a plot don't you get it? They succeeded." His head came up slowly to take a quick glimpse of her's. It was hanging down once more, away from him. His eyes fell on her full length mirror. Grabbing her hand, he began to drag her out of bed.
Showing some resistance, Kristi attempted to pull her hand away from his grip. "What are you doing?"
He placed her body in front of the mirror while he stood behind her with his hands on her nearly bare shoulders, his head bobbing a few inches above her own. "Take a look at us. Take a good look at us. We're living in fear." He looked down at her form. "We…are…drowning in fear."
Her eyes roamed over both of their figures. They were worn and devastatingly distraught. She couldn't bear to look at herself, to look at what she became. She became a person hiding behind a cloak of fear implanted into her head by a phantom. She didn't know what to do, what to think, she was lost. She turned her head away from their shimmering image and walked back to her bed.
Peter watched her carefully, not sure of what to make of everything. This was becoming trying. He couldn't read her eyes and that's what frightened him. He walked toward her form and knelt down in front of her. Grasping her hands, he made her look at him. "Kris…I love you. I could never say that to anyone else because of problems like this. I'm tired of the drowning. I'm not afraid to say it either. I love you so much, my chest hurts, like it's going to explode. I haven't gotten any sleep and everything is messed up." He felt like he was about to cry. Everything was caving in now. "I hurt so much…the thought of never talking to you, touching you, kissing you…never seeing you again. I can't hold this in anymore."
Her mother loved her…Mr. Morris loved her like a daughter of his own. She pulled her hands from him and squinted her eyes shut. He held onto her hands tightly, forcing her to be near him. He wasn't going to let her hide from this. "Kris, I know the risks. I've been down this path before, but I want to be able to love you. Not from a memory or a picture, but," his hand crept up to her cheek. In a whisper, he said quietly, "But up close and near you…with you. I want to love you.
It looked as though she didn't want to look at him. He couldn't understand why. It felt like hope was being taken from him with quickness that scared him. "Kristina…why won't you let me love you? I refuse to live in fear over something that could happen when I know that I could handle it….we could handle it." His last words echoed in her head. "They've played us like fools and I refuse to be someone's marionette. I don't want Spider Man, a phantom who knows no love, to love you, to be the only who can love you. Me, Peter, I want that. I deserve the chance to be able to." What could she do?
Back to me
She stopped looking at him. Her face expressed no emotions in that dimly lit room, her body made no effort to move toward him. She didn't fall into his arms; she said nothing to him. When he saw no reaction from her, he felt numb. He had nothing else to say. He couldn't read her for once; maybe he didn't want to. Her mental pulling away from him was the final blow. If she couldn't take him now, after all that he had said, after he shared his feelings with her, then what more could he do?
I know that it comes
He stood up quietly and whispered, "I'm sorry I came here and bothered you. I'm s-sorry." His chest began to tighten up as he found it more difficult to talk. Breathing became harder as grabbed for the bedpost to lean against trying to fully comprehend the loss he just experienced.
Back to me…
Kristi sat on her bed too stunned to move, too moved by his words to react. This is what they wanted…this is what those people wanted. She had vowed to never let these people strip her of her happiness or of what things that made her world go around. They didn't need to strip it from her; she had given it to them in a pretty box and bow.
Doesn't it scare you
Peter didn't look back at her as he proceeded toward the door that led outside. He murmured a quick good bye before reaching for the doorknob.
Your will is not as strong
Kristi's eyes jumped up quickly from the bed sheets that were being wrung in pain. "Peter wait."
As it used to be...
"What for?" he said with harshness. "Your feelings are clear on this. There's nothing more to discuss. It would be foolish for me to stay here-"
By now, she had crawled across the bed and was now walking toward Peter. "Peter…stay."
His eyes blinked for a moment as his hand paused on the partially opened door. Had he heard her correctly? He turned to her confused. "Stay?"
She reached her other hand around him and pushed the door close slowly, her eyes never leaving his. "Stay... please."
His eyes stayed on her's carefully. What he saw in his eyes made his heart jump. She asked him to stay…
Kristi's eyes fell over his somewhat shocked and relieved face. They could face this. She had been too ignorant to realize that she couldn't do this alone…it was foolish of her to think she could go on without him like this. Things couldn't end…not now. Gripping his arm, she pulled him toward her bed.
When she sat down, she tugged for him to sit next to her. "My clothes-"
She gave him a small smile. "That's okay..." He sat down next to her. Peter's breathing was deep now. His eyes fell over her face slowly. He freed of one his hands from her grasp and touched her face tenderly. He had forgotten how she felt…
Pulling her into an embrace, his nostrils burned with the scent of her. His cheek rubbed against her slightly damper head, which gave off an array of strawberry scented strands. He stood there…holding her against his much damper form, relishing in the fact that he was in fact holding her, a task he thought at one time, to be a long lost memory.
Kristi melted into his arms. It was as though a blanket of comfort had been wrapped around her form. Her head melted into his chest as she heard his heart beating softly behind his cotton shirt. Her head was soon lifted from its sanctuary and up toward his.
Peter's lips captured hers in a slow embrace, leaving both of their minds reeling. Peter hands claimed a mind of their own, as did Kristi's. His muscular hands held her tightly as Kristi's hands did the same.
Peter tried to keep some sort of self-reserve, but control was dwindling quickly. He pulled his head away slowly and peered at her closed eyelids. "What now?" he whispered softly.
Kristi's eyes fluttered open slowly. "Just lay here with me...just hold me." Nodding his head slowly, he sheepishly took his Nautica shirt off, placing it on the floor. He slipped his sandals off and then his jeans, leaving him in a pair of boxers. He slid under the covers with her and wrapped his arms around her. She was laying down on her side, facing him. She shut her eyes...
Peter just watched her shut eyes. So here they were...everything okay, she accepted him, they were together. Was it really real? For the longest time, he thought he lost her because of his pride and then the Mikala thing...He shuddered at the thought. He leaned in and kissed her forehead, then her eyes left then right, then her lips, just like he had always done. Sleep wasn't going to come to him, she was just too close to him and his body was too aware of her.
His kept kissing her face until he worked his way to her neck. He styed there, moving along her hair line and down to the base. Kristi's eyes fluttered open from the feather touches. "Peter..." she murmured.
He stopped immediately. What was his problem! He was and is incredibly and blamelessly male... He whispered softly, "I'm sorry...I just...I..." He sighed to himself. "I don't know."
What she saw was a deep passion hidden within his star like eyes. She gave him a small smile of understanding. This was it…she felt it; he felt it. She leaned in and kissed him back with frankness that took him off guard.
She ran a finger down his jaw and stared at him with openness that scared him at first, but made him feel better all the same.
He extended her arm toward him and kissed her hand. His kisses worked their way to her shoulder slowly.
Once there, his hand rubbed her back slightly as his kisses traveled from her shoulder to her neck. She turned her body slightly to give him better access. He kissed her neck and worked his way to the other side of her neck to her other shoulder. From her shoulder, he traveled to her other hand. Placing her hand on his cheek, he reached over her and held her other hand. His body was slightly over hers as his face leaned in closer to hers. He kissed her forehead before he opened his mouth. "Are you sure?"
She nodded her head. "Yes…"
Breathing in deeply he said in a shy voice, "You know, I've never.."
She smiled at his attempt of an explanation. "I've never either." His body was more over hers now as he stared into her eyes. His face fell to hers and kissed her once more. It was at that moment that they, for the first time, lost themselves in each other.
…...
Peter woke up first. He looked down to see Kristi sleeping against him on her stomach with one arm over his chest and her other on the other side of her head. It was holding the hand of Peter's outstretched arm that cradled between her neck and the bed.
He stifled a small yawn before looking back to her ceiling. His lips curled into a small smile. He hadn't anticipated this happening. His mind reasoned that there is no better way to express your love for someone than physically. Sometimes words weren't enough… Yawning again, he freed one of his hands and snaked it around sheer curtain to glimpse at the clock. The blue digital numbers read: 6:45. His eyes fell on the French doors. The sun was beginning to peak through the curtains
He looked down at Kristi again before shifting to get up. Moving stealthily, he maneuvered himself off of the bed without disturbing her slumber. Finding his boxers, he slipped them on to cover himself. He headed to the bathroom…
A sea of dark blue met Kristi's eyes as she opened them slowly. Letting out a small yawn, her eyes moved to the other side of her queen size bed. Peter wasn't there…Her eyes were wide open now. Her first thought was that it was a dream. If it was…she was certainly an imaginative girl!
The silky sheets felt smoother than usual. Peaking under the sheet, she realized, it wasn't a dream…she realized she was naked. Nope…wasn't a dream. She sat up slowly as she peered through the room. She stretched her arms up and slumped into her bed some more. It wasn't until she heard her bathroom door open that reflexes left her scrambling for her sheets.
Peter pulled the curtain back and saw Kristi up. Her hands loosened their grip around the sheet as she made a small smile. He returned it, and crawled back into the bed. His eyes fell from her face to around her face. They landed on her unruly almost ebony hair. Passing a hand through it, he kissed her forehead gently and put his arm around her almost in reassurance
Kristi's body relaxed into his arm as she leaned back into the embrace. They slid down to the pillows and just laid there under silk sheets in each other's presence. There was nothing but the silence that surrounded them. There was nothing to be said. Everything of importance had been spoken through small gestures and glances. That's all that counted…
Simple - India Arie
Echo- Incubus
Back to you- John Mayer
Note: Okay...there ya go! The story is coming to close soon...maybe in the next two or three chapters. Please don't forget to review. Later Folks!