Jaina must have stared into the face of her brother for hours, for time had lost all meaning to her. Jacen had been in Vong captivity for weeks, months even, yet he remained the same. He looked exactly as Jaina remembered him, but felt impossibly different. Try as hard as Jaina could, she could not reopen their twin bond; that part of her heart remained dark, as if Jacen was dead.
But he's not dead.
No. He was standing right in front of her. She could see him with her eyes, her brain, but he remained invisible to her senses. Jaina tried again to reach him through the Force; she tried to just feel him. Nothing worked. In the space Jacen should have stood, there was only emptiness. The Force had deserted her.
No. The Force did not desert me, or Jacen. Jacen only deserted it.
"Hey, Solo? What's going on over there?" Jaina recognized Baron Fel's voice, felt him in the Force, and did not turn around to know that he had followed her out of the hangar, only to stop at the doors once he saw the other Jedi.
"Start gathering refugees. Pack as many in as you can," Jaina shouted back, turning around and nodding at Fel, giving him a look that she hoped he would understand; to finish his duties, and leave her to hers.
When her eyes returned once again to rest on Jacen, he was smiling. Not the smile she had come to know through out her childhood and teenage years, but a smile of a warrior, ready for battle.
He spoke first: "Dear sister. I didn't expect to find you here." His voice sounded the same and so completely different at the same time.
"If you had opened yourself up to the Force, you would have," Jaina answered, not quite reproving of him. She didn't know how to feel. Her brother was alive, in the flesh, but dead to her, in the Force. Her mind was swirling with emotions she could not comprehend, and Jaina didn't even bother to calm herself down with Jedi techniques. She absentmindedly realized that she had almost fallen out of touch with the Force in the past few minutes, only touching it slightly to allow her to intercept warnings and other telepathic messages.
"Ah, the Force," Jacen mused, almost as if talking to himself. He broke his gaze off Jaina, and looked towards the skies. He snorted and shook his head. "I no longer need the Force. I have become so much greater. So much, you could not even begin to imagine. But you will soon find the True Way, as I have. You will become what I have."
Jaina nodded, not quite sure what to make of it. "Jacen, you have to come with me. We have to go back to Borleias. You just escaped from Vong captivity, you must have all kinds of information--"
"Captivity? Captivity? Jaina, the only time I was ever a captive was during my time here, among the infidels," Jacen spat out. "But I am above that. We are above that."
Jaina just stared at him. Her own brother, her own twin brother, had just sprouted off Vong propaganda, their beliefs, and claimed them to be his own. He had been brainwashed during his captivity. He had become what Tahiri Veila almost because on Yavin 4. No, he wasn't turned in to a Yuuzhan Vong physically, but mentally, the transformation was complete. He had even shut himself down in the Force to be more like them!
Jaina hated it.
She almost hated her brother for succumbing to it. Her rage filled her, empowered her, but Jaina had to keep from letting it become her. That was the path of the Dark Side, and Jaina had seen far too many times where it would lead.
Jacen was still alive, breathing. Which meant there was still hope.
"You've built another lightsaber," Jaina pointed at his blue blade, as if to remind him that he was still a Jedi, that despite his renunciation of the Force, he had not severed all links to it.
Jacen sneered. "This abomination? No, I didn't build this. Why waste the time, when there was so many available for me?"
"From other fallen Jedi, I presume?" Jaina felt the anger rising again. His brother had just picked up a sacred weapon, built by some other being who put their life and existence into its creation, and converted it into nothing else but a weapon for him to kill with.
Jacen nodded, smiling. "It's only a weapon, Jaina."
"If it was only a weapon, Jacen, then you would have chosen an amphistaff. Certainly, that's not an abomination," Jaina pointed out. "You are still a Jedi, Jacen. You don't simply forget about that. It doesn't just go away, no matter how much you close yourself off to the Force."
"I told you, sister, the Force no longer has any meaning to me. I have surpassed all your Jedi games, became what I was destined to. What we were both destined to. You just have to accept the fact that you are better then these infidels," Jacen said, moving a step closer to Jaina. They now stood only a meter apart, their weapons held at guard, in case the other decided to press an attack. "Jaina, you have no idea what I've seen, what I've learned. You can't even begin to comprehend the things they showed me. The Truth."
"They're your enemies, Jacen! Murderers, thieves and invaders! I can learn nothing from the Vong, nor would I ever want to!"
"But you will Jaina. You don't have a choice. After I finish with my work here, you and I are going to have along talk on the way back to the worldship."
"There's no chance I'm going with you. You'll have to kill me first," Jaina said determinedly, lowering her lightsaber and shutting it down. Jacen wouldn't kill her when she was defenseless. She was sure of it.
"I can't kill you Jaina. Not just yet, anyway," Jacen responded. "We're not properly set up for a sacrifice of this magnitude."
"Sacrifice?" Jaina was shocked. Jacen couldn't kill her now, but not because he was her brother, because he loved her, because he was a Jedi, but because he was saving her death for later, when he could properly sacrifice her to his new gods. "Jacen, you don't want to kill me. Or yourself. Please, you have to remember--"
"Jaina, you misunderstand. I remember everything. They didn't erase my memory like Tahiri. They only showed me the Truth. How could I not join them after that?" Jacen asked, as if the answer was obvious, Jaina tried again in vain to send him her feelings through their Force. He remained invisible. "You will soon understand, Jaina. Everything will turn out for the best."
"The best? The best for who, Jacen?"
Jacen looked at her like she had grown another head. "The Gods, of course. And all those blessed by them."
Jaina had no response. She was in too much shock to think of anything to say. Not a comeback, a plea, or an insult. Her mind came up with nothing. Her own brother was prepared to capture her and sacrifice her, along with himself, for some gods the Vong had made him believe in. This wasn't her brother; he just looked like him.
She heard rather than sensed people coming to the docks, and saw a group of about ten people appear behind Jacen. They stopped to stare at Jacen's lightsaber. Apparently, the Chiss didn't have many visits from the Jedi, for they watched the lightsaber with fascination.
A slow smile spread on Jacen's lips. "We'll have to finish this conversation later, sister. I do have a mission objective to finish." He turned and broke into a run towards the refugees, his lightsaber swinging in a circular motion as he ran.
It took Jaina less than a nanosecond to Force-leap in front of him. She was confused and hurt, but she knew for sure that she would not let Jacen murder innocent people. The Force had guided her all the way to the Unknown Regions for Jacen's sake, and it would not be a good start towards his recovery to let him kill refugees.
Jaina swung out her lightsaber, catching Jacen's in the middle of another circle, forcing him to either stop and face her, or drop the lightsaber. Knowing that he wouldn't be able to do much damage without a weapon, Jacen stopped in his tracks, and confronted Jaina. "You would rather kill your own brother to save strangers' lives?"
"You're ready to kill me, Jacen. Why not return the favor?" Jaina countered, bringing her lightsaber around to attempt a slash at his stomach. Jacen parried, but not as smoothly as Jaina would have expected. Then again, he's not fighting with the Force. I guess that part was left out in the Vong brainwashing manual.
With the Force, Jacen had been far better than Jaina in lightsaber combat, resulting from his long, exhausting bouts with Anakin, but without the Force, she had an edge over him. After a few minutes of battle, Jacen miscalculated an attack, and Jaina sent his lightsaber spinning some ten meters away. Without even thinking, only feeling with the Force, Jaina swung the lightsaber towards Jacen's head--
--And stopped ten centimeters away from his head. To her horror, the Force was guiding her to kill her brother. It had felt so right.
She lowered her weapon. "I can't do it. I can't kill my own brother."
Jacen smiled triumphantly. He started to get to his feet.
"Yeah, well, I can!" A violet blade swung towards Jacen, who threw himself on the ground to avoid being split in two. Kyp moved in front of Jaina, with his lightsaber pointing down high above his head, ready to finish Jacen off, when Jaina grabbed the back of Kyp's shirt, and pulled him away from Jacen. She stepped between the two men, and raised her lightsaber again, preparing to fight. She looked at Kyp defiantly. "Back off, Kyp."
Kyp's mouth was hanging open, and through the Force, Jaina could sense his disbelief that she was about to stand up for Jacen. He was obviously at a loss of words, so he said the first thing that popped into his mind: "You selfish brat."
Jaina was too stunned to say anything.
"All you ever think about is yourself, Jaina." Kyp continued. "You came halfway across the galaxy to save your boyfriend, not even thinking of the billions of other people on this planet who needed your help. And now, you were ready to let Jacen go on a killing spree if it would let you have your brother back!"
That made her angry. "Where do you get off? You expect me to kill my own brother?" She smiled sweetly as inspiration struck. "That's more of a Kyp Durron type of thing to do."
Jaina felt Kyp's outrage and sadness over her comment, but he had it under control in a flash. His voice was calm when he spoke. "You saw where the dark side can take you, Jaina. You don't want to go down that path again..." Kyp trailed off, his eyes looking behind Jaina. "Where did Jacen go?"
Jaina spun around quickly, but Jacen wasn't lying on the ground anymore. His lightsaber was nowhere to be seen either. She spun to face Kyp again, and to her horror, spotted Jacen behind Kyp, his lightsaber ready to plunge into Kyp's heart. She screamed out a warning to Kyp, who spun around and slammed then end of his lightsaber into Jacen's nose, sending him reeling back. He dropped his lightsaber, and screamed in agony, his hands going up to his face.
Only he wasn't grabbing his nose. Actually, once the ooglith masquer peeled away, there wasn't much of a nose left anyway.
This wasn't her brother; it just looked like him.
In retrospect, all the signs were there: he couldn't be felt in the Force, he acted like a Vong warrior, and fought like one too. Jaina felt like an idiot for not realizing it sooner. Apparently, someone in Vong high command had apparently decided to play with a little psychological warfare himself. Only Jaina had been too preoccupied with having her brother back to pay attention to any of these signs. She even stopped paying attention to the Force when it was telling her Jacen was the enemy. The she remembered the vision she had aboard the Lusankya; the vision had clearly shown a Yuuzhan Vong imitating Jacen. Jaina had almost forgotten about it. The Force sent her a clear warning, she just stopped paying attention.
Jaina sank to the ground. She couldn't fight any more. She felt like letting the Vong impostor kill her then and there. However, he never got the chance. In the confusion of taking off his ooglith masquer, the Vong warrior wasn't paying attention to Kyp, who took the opportunity to stab him right under his armpit, the known weakness in the Yuuzhan Vong armor. Once he was finished, Kyp walked over to Jaina, and sat beside her. They sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity.
Jaina broke the silence first. "Where's Jag?"
"We met his father on the way, and they stopped to assist him with the refugees." Kyp's tone was neutral. If he thought her selfish again for asking about Jag first, he didn't let it show.
Jaina nodded. "I couldn't let you kill him."
Even with the sudden change of topic, Kyp understood what she was talking about. "I know."
"I thought the Force sent me here to protect him. Save him. Bring him back to us." Jaina continued. "But that's not the case."
"Which leaves only one question." Kyp looked directly into Jaina's eyes. "Why did the Force guide you here?"
Only a few days later, sitting in her quarters with Jag in comfortable silence, did Jaina come up with an answer. "I'm not ready."
Are you ready, Jaina? Anakin's voice rang back in her mind.
Jaina, her head resting on Jag's abdomen, felt him prop himself up on his elbows to look at her. "For what?"
For whatever it takes.
"For this war." Jaina answered simply. "That's what the Force was trying to tell me."
Jag didn't respond, waiting for her to elaborate.
"Ever since this war began and I joined the military, I have been seriously neglecting my training. My Jedi training. I mean, I can't even remember the last time I trained with Mara!"
"Jaina, it's not like you were sitting around at home, watching old holodramas." Jag replied. "You've been busy with the war effort."
"That's the whole point. I've been too busy with Twin Suns, and this whole Goddess business. But I don't think that's the role I was supposed to play."
Jag pondered this for a moment. "Are you saying you're going to resign your commission?"
Jaina smiled sadly. "Once your uncle gets a hold of me, I don't think I'll have much of a commission left."
Jag laughed softly. "Maybe. You'll have plenty of time to resume your training, in either case."
"Funny how it all worked out like that."
Wedge looked up from his datapad once Jaina Solo entered his office. She offered a sharp salute, and stood stiffly, staring at the wall. Wedge decided to let her stay in that position for a while. "Would you like to go first, or should I?"
"Go ahead, sir."
"Well, in that case, I don't know where to start. You disobeyed a direct order from me. Again. You put yours and Kyp's lives in danger, again. You put the whole Goddess plan in jeopardy to pursue a personal agenda,again! If you can't follow orders when we're not even in battle, how can I rely on you to do what I want when lives depend on it?" Wedge practically shouted at her. "What do you have to say for yourself?"
"Nothing, sir."
"Good, because I have a solution to our problem. Jag or Kyp, I don't dare which one, is taking over Twin Suns. That's the first order of business. Second, you are devoting all your energies from now on to the Goddess project. Your father came up with a brilliant plan."
Jaina frowned. "My father?"
"Yes. Do you remember that Thrawn-clone crisis we had a few years ago?" Wedge grimaced when he realized that the crisis he was referring to occurred nine years ago. And the first Thrawn crisis was ten years before that! I'm getting too old. At Jaina's nod, he continued. "Do you remember a guy named Tierce?"
"That guy Thrawn cloned and put a bit of himself in?"
Wedge nodded. "That's right. He created a perfect propaganda tool that almost started a civil war. And he did it with a con artist, making everyone believe that Thrawn was back. Well, we are going to use Thrawn's intelligence against the Vong.
"Whenever there is a battle, or we think there are Yuuzhan Vong spies present, or if I just want to be amused, your role will be to sit on the bridge and give orders that I relay to you."
Jaina's expression didn't betray what she was feeling. "Yes, sir."
"Do you have anything to add?"
"No, sir."
"Dismissed, then. We'll talk more about this later." Jaina saluted again, and quickly left Wedge's office, leaving him to wonder if this new plan was working out directly to Jaina's satisfaction.
Jag was waiting for Jaina in her quarters when she came back from Wedge's office. "How did it go?"
Jaina considered the question. "Could have been a lot worse, under the circumstances."
"Well, what happened?"
"Twin Suns is being handed over to you and Kyp, and I am to devote all my energies to this Goddess thing. They're going to have me pretending like I run the show, things like that." She sighed. "At least, with all my responsibilities gone, I'll have more time to devote to Jedi training."
"With Kyp?"
"With Kyp, or Mara, or Uncle Luke, or any Jedi Master who's in the area." Jaina smiled as she sat down beside Jag. "I have some catching up to do."
Jag leaned in for a quick kiss. He let his lips linger there more than he had first intended to, but just found it difficult to pull away.
Jaina pulled away, smiling slightly. "So, what were you up to today?"
"Shawnkyr contacted me. She hooked up with another squadron, and she's staying with them for a little while. She was careful not to disclose her location, so I think they're up to something big, and didn't want to share it with whoever was listening in." Jag answered. "Then, I had lunch with my family, trying to talk Tarion out of joining the military. He wants to join Twin Suns, as it happens. Then I had to track down your mother, and talk to her on my sisters behalf."
"My mother?" Jaina looked puzzled.
"Yeah. Luna wants to go into politics, or something like that," Jag replied, grimacing at his sister's choice of career. "Your mother is taking her on as an aide, have her organizing refugees and stuff like that."
"Sounds like a good learning experience."
"Yes, that was what I was thinking too."
"Great minds think alike, then."
Jag smiled at Jaina's comment. "Yeah, it seems so." He kissed Jaina again. "So, what are your plans for later?"
"A little weight training, then going for a run. Sparring with Kyp, if he has time." She smiled at Jag. "But that's not for another hour, or so. What are your plans?"
"Suddenly, my next hour became free." He pulled Jaina to him for another kiss.
The End