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Unravel

"Kenshin!" I ran through the gates with the small bundle of cakes Tae had given to me as a gift. I was so excited to share them with him. I was so carefree then.

No, not at the washing tub. Funny, the clothes were still in a pile, I thought he would have been finished washing them. Then I found out why they were still there.

"Kaoru-dono?"

I smiled brightly as I turned to face him. "Kenshin Tae gave us some cakes!!"

That sweet smile of his always brought comfort to me. However, there was something akin to sadness behind those big violet eyes and it scared me. "Kenshin?"

"We have a guest Kaoru-dono." He guided me to the living room, a gentle hand on my shoulder. I didn't want him to let me go.

"Kaoru-dono, this is an old friend of mine Aya-dono."

She was breath taking. She donned a simple blue kimono but she made it look so beautiful, her eyes held joy and kindness. There was something about her that made you feel safe and loved, but that also frightened me.

"Yoroshiku," she bowed gracefully. It was times like these that I genuinely felt Megumi´s words true. I was really was a tanuki, especially compared to Her.

"Yoroshiku," I returned her bow. It was customary. I sat down in front of her and my heart tore into when Kenshin sat beside her. "How do you two know each other?"

She smiled that lovely smile of hers and her voice was wistful. "We met years ago. Himura-san stayed with me for a few months."

I tried not to close my eyes and show them my pain so I feigned a smile and listened to their story.

"Sessha had just began wandering. I didn´t know where I was when I heard someone cry out. It turned out that it was a group of men harassing a small boy. I was about to intervene but Aya-dono beat me to it."

She laughed, it sounded like bells. "I had no idea what I was doing. I just saw the child be beaten and I very well could not see that happening so I picked up the biggest stick I could find and tried to hit them with it."

He laughed too, he seemed so relaxed.


"Of course, Himura-san saved the day and he ended up staying at my home that night as a reward."

I smiled and tried to look humored. But I remained silent for fear of speaking the truth.


They continued the story. It was much like ours. A battle here and there. The truth of His true identity, she didn´t care either. The day turned to night. I thought it ironic, that he fell for this woman, although he had said no such thing .. yet.

"My goodness, we´ve talked all day!"

I smiled and nodded. "Yes." Nothing more.

He turned to me with pleading eyes. "Maybe Aya-dono can stay the night. After all, it is late and we have more than enough room here for her."

Who was I to deny him? And I wasn't a spiteful person by nature, but this time maybe I should have been. "Of course she can stay!"


I saw her about to protest when I shook my head. "No I insist, you´re like family now. After what you´ve been through with Kenshin I can relate and I feel like I know you."

It´s true. I did feel like I knew her. I was her, in a sense. She had come before I did, shown bravery and persistence. Her stubbornness rivaled mine but she felt like she was so much more than I was. Aya was what He need to heal his wounds not me.

I sat on the edge of the walkway, staring at the night sky. I heard light footsteps that were foreign to me but I knew who it was.

"Kaoru-chan?" She had insisted that we call each other by those honorifics because we felt so close to each other, gone through the same experiences.

But I couldn't dare. "Konbanwa, Aya-san." I tilted my head and smiled.

She sat down next to me and stared at the stars as she spoke. "I had almost forgotten how wonderful Himura-san is."

"Aa." I didn't want her to continue. It was obvious where she was going.

"Has he told you?"

"Told me what?"

"Who he is?"

I nodded. "I found out the next day." I pulled my legs to my chest, trying to gain comfort.

I could almost feel her smile. "So you didn't care either? He's lucky, you know, he was always belittling himself."

"He still does."

"I love him."

My heart broke. Why did she have to be so honest? Couldn't she have at least hid it awhile longer? I nodded. "I know."

"You love him?"

I shook my head and smiled at her. I lied. "Of course, he's like a brother to me." The words pained me as the left my mouth. I didn't want them to see my pain so I continued to smile.

She sat closer to me and I could feel her shoulder rub against mine. "I thought you loved him ... more than that."

"No." My head hurt.

Aya bumped me playfully. "Silly me. I was beginning to get jealous!"

I laughed away my sorrows and bumped her shoulder. I think I was testing her then, seeing if she was worthy enough for Him. But it's not like I could have kept them away from each other.

"You're a brave woman, Kaoru-chan."

I blinked and turned to look at her face. Her brown eyes peered into my own blue ones. "What do you mean by that?"

"You are a woman who believes in something that most people would find ridiculous. I admire you for your bravery to take on a society that shuns women that are independent."

I was in shock. I never expected this woman to admire me. After all she was so much more worthy than I was. And I let her know. "But you, Aya-san, are so much more." I turned to stare at the stars that twinkled high above us. "You traveled a long distance to find a man you loved years ago. Your determination to find him, no matter what the costs ... it's ... wonderful."

She smiled at me and thanked me. The silence between us was comfortable but I could still feel the tension.

"You're leaving with him?" I smiled bitterly, hoping she would not see it.

"Yes, he agreed to accompany me. He was going to speak to you but I think he's too afraid."

I turned to her and beamed a false light. "That baka isn't leaving without saying goodbye I hope!"

Why was I giving up so easily? What if he didn't want to go? What if he really was just accompanying her back home?

But what if he wasn't? Was that why he was so afraid?

"You should go speak to him, Kaoru-chan." Those perfectly white teeth flashed at me and her eyes twinkled.

I nodded and walked to His room.

"Come in," his voice was strained. He really didn't want to speak to me.

His eyes were downcast and his hair unbounded. "Kaoru-dono." At least he acknowledged my presence.

I sat down in front of him, my legs neatly tucked under me. I never knew how I kept from falling over that night. I was so unbalanced. "I heard you were accompanying Aya-san to her home. That's far away."

The apprehension in the room was choking me and I hoped that my voice wouldn't crack in the middle of the conversation. I braced myself for the impact of the words as he spoke.

"Hai. Sessha is accompanying Aya-dono to her home in Toyama."

At least it wasn't as far as Kyoto.

"Will you be returning?"

There was silence and that was the longest moment in my entire life. I awaited his answer but I knew what it was. Although silence is not meant to be used as a reply they are usually answers for the most dreaded questions.

"I didn't think so. At least you gave me a warning." I tired not to sound so sad, so cold and it worked. This was the night where I found my natural talent for acting. "You love her, don't you?"

His violet gaze never left mine and it seemed as if he were testing me.

I sighed and tried to bury the emotions. He was going to find his happiness and that was what mattered. As long as he found it I would be happy. Or, I would try to be. Much like he did I put on the mask. "Well, I guess this is our last night as a family then! So lets make it special!"

His gaze was wide and he looked at me as if I had grown a second head. Figuratively speaking, I think I did. "Kaoru-dono?" He was confused.

"Oh come on Kenshin! Don't be so glum! As long as you're happy!" I smiled, I wondered if he knew it was fake.

But then he smiled too. So sincere so serene and I couldn't help but truly smile back. "Hai, lets go Kaoru-dono."

"You're not really letting him go. Are you, Busu?"

I didn't have the heart to whack the kid on the head. I don't even think I heard him call me that accursed insult. "He doesn't belong here, you saw that last night."

We watched as they walked off that morning. Yahiko was angry with me, for letting him go. He never did understand why I didn't put up a fight. He didn't see the happiness in His eyes like I did.

I was so foolish to think that he didn't fall in love those ten years he wandered. To think that he didn't go through the same dangers with some else. That he didn't share the same excitement with someone more worthy.

I wasn't the only woman that shed tears for his past. I wouldn't be the last, she would.