"Remind me, Bailiff," began Judge Strickley. "Why are we eating here?"
"Why, Bettina," said the Bailiff as the two crossed the street. "It's convenient to have a bistro that's right across the street." He opened the door to the Courthouse Cafe. "After you."
Strickley entered. "I see the rest of the court beat us here."
Ron glanced at his sandwich as Rufus tunneled into it. "I ordered extra tomato on my BLT."
Phobe lifted the bread on his own plate. There were three slices of tomato. "I think they switched ours." They swapped. The police officer lifted his new sandwich to his lips as Rufus peeked his head out. "AAAAUGH!"
Rufus gasped, then giggled.
Ron picked up the naked mole rat and stuck him in his pocket. "Rufus, I enjoy a good practical joke as much as you do, but don't you think that's going a little too far?"
The pink rodent shook his head.
"Oh, fine, but I'm not paying the medical bills when the poor guy has a heart attack."
"Party pooper," squeaked Rufus.
Kim held out a plate of scallops. "Try these, your honor. They're delicious."
The judge glared. "I'm allergic to bivalves. A good lawyer would know that."
"I'm sorry. I'll see if the cooks can cater more to your shellfish demands."
"I caught that!"
Drakken sat down at Ron's table. "Want to take a five-minute polygraph test?"
"No. You've probably rigged the needle to go up no matter what I say." Ron picked up his tray and walked to the other side of the restaurant.
"Chicken!" yelled the mad scientist after him.
Shego rushed forward with a roast chicken on a platter.
Phobe screamed. "There's a mouse in that corner!"
Marguerite wrinkled her nose. "It's just a ball of dust."
"Well, that ball of dust is walking and has a tail!"
"Oh, for J. Edgar Hoover's sake!"
Marguerite snatched up the 'mouse' and held it up. "Dust bunny. How on earth can you fear mice? You've faced far worse. Terrorists. Armed bank robbers. Rabid dogs. Evil girl scouts and their cookies of doom!"
"At least girl scouts don't carry plague."
"That's fleas," corrected Lin.
"Or malaria."
"Anopheles mosquito," snapped Lin, turning to her salad and punching in figures on a fancy calculator. "64 ounces of pure water, one pound of lettuce..."
Marguerite turned to her plate. "Mmm."
Yurin whipped out his fork. Crunch! Snort! Crinkle! Slice! Munch, munch, munch! Chomp! Slice! Burp!
"I feel like such an amateur," groaned Officer Oakes.
Drakken went to the dessert tray. On the plate was a single sugar cookie.
Shego appeared beside him. "Guess who's gonna get that cookie."
"I'm the boss!"
"And I'm the one who cleans your stupid lair!"
"Age before beauty!"
"Pearls before swine!"
"I want it!" Drakken jumped up and down. "I saw it first!"
"I'll flip you for it."
"Sure."
Shego took her boss's arm, flipped him over her head, and snatched the prize.
Drakken kicked his feet and pounded his fists in the classic temper tantrum. "WAAAAH!"
"Oh, fine, you big baby," Shego broke the cookie in half and handed over the bigger piece.
Phobe took out a sprig of mistletoe, then held it over Shego's head. She frowned, put on her black glove and fired a green ray from it. The sprig roasted.
Marguerite read from a printout. "Wanted in eleven countries. Well versed in her ABCs: Armed robbery, bombing, conspiracy, disguise, extortion, etc. Victims have stammered various descriptions, but all agree on pale skin, long black hair, and green and black clothes. Darn it, Phobe. I'd like to say this is a step up from hitting on me, but I'm just not sure."
The Kimmunicator beeped. Kim pulled it out. "Make it count, Wade."
"Small update. The stolen hand drill was found in an ER trash can, painted pink. No fingerprints."
"Who on earth would rob a hardware store, steal only a hand drill, paint it pink, then throw it away?"
"Search me. Middleton has some pretty strange crooks.
Kim looked in Drakken and Shego's direction. "That goes without saying."
*************************************************************************
Ten minutes later, everyone was back in the courtroom.
Hettie Cephalus had already been sworn in.
"Is it true, Ms. Cephalus, that you are a zoologist specializing in Family Bathyergidae."
"That I am."
"And that the defendant's pet is a naked mole rat?"
"Very fine specimen."
"Can a naked mole rat chew through a concrete safe?"
"Their jaw muscles are powerful enough."
"Ms. Cephalus, does that prove that this particular naked mole rat chewed through that safe?" interjected Kim.
"No. It just proves it could have."
Drakken elbowed his opponent out of the way. "I call my final witness. Officer Yurin Deeptrouble."
Ron felt his throat tighten.
The oath process was repeated.
Drakken turned to the cop. "What did you find at the crime scene?"
"We found our thief had forced a window and left no fingerprints or footprints. We took this photograph of the safe. The last thing we found was this black beret with blonde hairs stuck to it."
"And everyone knows Kim Possible's sidekick can barely keep his head on straight, much less his hat!" called Drakken out gleefully.
"How do you know someone else didn't just dye his hair blond and steal the necklace?" inquired Kim.
"These hairs are blonde all the way to the root."
Drakken cleared his throat, which was getting sore from asking all the questions. At least being the king of the world wouldn't require so much vocal effort. "You may step down, Officer. The prosecution rests."
"Defense," called the judge. "Call your first witness."
Kim faced the jury. "I'm sure you're all tired of hearing Drakken blow his horn."
"Honk!" The myriad jury members all blew their noses.
Shego clamped one hand over her mouth and ran into an alcove. Her laughter echoed through the courthouse.
Kim wiped her forehead. "Your honor, may I take a brief restbit?"
"Fine, Miss Possible. Five minutes -- and I'm counting!"
Kim took Lin's shoulder and eased her out of the courtroom. "I need your help."
"For what?"
"I need you to be my witness."
"WHAT?! I haven't spoken to a crowd since Whiz Kid."
"That show was then. This is now. Now get thee to the witness stand!"
"I will not!"
Kim let out a deep breath, knocking her classmate over. "Yes, you will." She threw open the courtroom doors. "Your honor, I call Miss Lin Vincibel to the stand to rebuke the testimonies."
Lin adjusted her glasses, and sat crossly in the witness box. "I'm not saying anything. I hate her."
Judge Strickley looked quizzically at Kim. "You two...know each other?"
"Yes, she's my classmate."
"That would explain the hostility," hissed the Bailiff, holding out the Kim Possible episode script.
Lin stood up. "Get that thing away from me."
"Lynnette Elizabeth Vincibel!" called Phobe. "On behalf of your parents, I command you not to leave that box until told to do so!"
"All right, Uncle. I give up." She placed her right hand on the script. "In the name of justice, in the name of honesty, and in the name of all that is fair, I, Lynnette Elizabeth Vincibel do solemnly pledge to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth."
Kim took the photograph from the evidence envelope. "The Prosecution believes that Rufus chewed a hole through the safe. Tell me, by what you see in that picture, does their statement hold water?"
The witness stared hard at the picture for two solid minutes. "No," she concluded. "The Prosecution's statement is a sieve."
"How do you know?!" snapped Drakken.
"Because these marks were not made by a naked mole rat. They were made by a 2002 Constructo-Works G-6000 hand drill!"
"I object!" the mad scientist shrieked. "That's simply your opinion."
The judge turned to Lin. "Is it?"
"It's a fact," she replied. "Would you like me to explain?"
Kim grinned smugly. "I would love to hear this."
"So would I," chorused the jury.
"It's simple," Lin began. "First off, no animal could have made the hole. The marks are too even and too perfect. Most hand drills can drill through concrete, but would wear as it got along. Didn't happen here. The drill bit stayed sharp and cut smooth. There are only two sets capable of this type of work: the Constructo-Work's G-series and the Holey Tools' Widowmaker. The Widowmaker is way too massive for one person to hold. So are the G-1000 through G-5000. The G-7000 can fit into the palm of a hand, but doesn't have enough power to drill through a foot-thick concrete safe in that short of a time. Therefore, the drill was the slightly-larger G-6000."
"Well, that just about clears up everything."
Drakken was down, but not out. "That still doesn't disprove that the buffoon didn't commit the crime!"
"By the way," Lin began. "How did the thief leave the Clutchcoin house?"
"The back gate, you simpleton!"
"How? The back gate was nearly impossible to force. Even if had been pried open, the alarm would have gone off."
"That's true," added Al.
"My guess is that the thief climbed the fence," stated Lin.
"Now what idiot would be stupid enough to climb a barbed wire fence?!"
"I learned from experience Ron doesn't have the stamina to climb any fence, must less a barbed wire one," Kim put in.
"Hey!" complained Ron.
"Well, you don't!"
"But did you have to throw me over that fence?!"
The Kimmunicator beeped. Kim yanked it out. "Go, Wade."
"I want the entire court to hear this."
Kim went to the TV and plugged in the Kimmunicator. Wade's face appeared on the screen.
Wade held up a printout. "Dr. Gench of the Middleton Legacy Memorial Hospital says he examined a teenager who matches Ron's description. This guy came in with a sliced arm. And when the doctor took an X-ray of the arm to check for fractures, he found a piece of barbed stuck in the wound."
"Eeew..." went the Twelve.
"Gross indeed," commented Kim.
"But that's not all," continued Wade.
"Spit it out!" yelled the jury.
"Three colorless diamonds were found in his possession."
Drakken clenched his fists and growled. "I told him to sell them!"
Everyone in the courtroom gasped.
Shego smacked her forehead. Way to go, ship sinker.
Judge Strickley stared coldly at the loose-lipped lawyer. "Do you have something to say to the court, Dr. Drakken?"
"Well, um, no..."
"Actually, he does!" called out Ron, flipping back his shirt collar. Imbedded in the fabric was a tiny silver chip, apparently of Wade's creation. Rufus popped it in a black box and pushed a button.
"It means when the media finds you've been convicted of a crime, they'll suspect Kim Possible, since a buffoon like you couldn't possibly pull off a scheme this big! Kim Possible's name will be dragged through the mud. No one will ever trust her again. And I'll finally be free to conquer the world!" came Drakken's voice.
"But what about being reformed? Seeing the light? Your crusade in the name of justice?" Ron was asking.
"Ha ha ha! Only an idiot would believe such a mad scientist's promises! Thanks to Shego, I cheated my way to the perfect score! And you have no way of stopping me! Ha ha ha!"
Drakken wanted the floor to swallow him up. Trapped by my own gloating! Shego was right. I must learn to keep my big mouth shut.
"Shame on you!" chorused the Twelve.
Miranda Wright frowned. "You have the right to remain silent."
The femme fatale knew her rights and choose to exercise this particular one, shooting a poisonous glance at her redhaired nemesis.
"This is not over, Kim Possible!" yelled Drakken as several guards yanked him out of the room. "You think you're all that, but you're not!"
Once the pair had left, Judge Strickley cleared her throat. "In light of this development...I'd like to dismiss any and all charges against Ronald Stoppable. Court adjourned."
A cheer went up in the courtroom.
Ron leaped out of his seat. "Boo-yah!" Then remembering where he was, added, "Thank you, your honor."
"See, Yurin? You can trust teenagers." Marguerite kissed her partner on the cheek.
"Oooh!" went the
Yurin blushed red. "And earthly power doth then show likest the highest when mercy seasons justice."
Lin stepped down from the witness box. "Kim, you did it. But with suffering comes guilt. I will never let you forget this."
"Good work, Possible," congratulated Mr. Barkin. Then he heard a voice that made his blood run cold.
"Oh, Stevie!" Amy Hall, known to the world as DNAmy, ran in, arms wide.
Miranda consulted her clipboard. "Amy, aren't you supposed to be at the movies right now?" Oh, well. She's not dangerous, just a bit crazy. And lovesick. No, wait. She is dangerous.
"It's so lonely going to the movies by my self," Amy whispered. "I like to go with a date that lets me cry on his shoulder."
Steve Barkin had heard enough. He did the natural thing -- bolted.
"Now, Stevie, you come back here!"
The crowd began to disperse.
When the courtroom was empty except for the Bailiff and the judge. The Bailiff was holding a box. "I have to deliver this to Middleton High."
Judge Strickley lifted the flap. "Pompoms?"
"Yup. They wore the old ones out."
"Bailiff, did you know I was a graduate of Middleton High?"
"Yeah. I also know you were an Honors student."
"Bet you didn't know I was captain of the cheerleading squad."
"Were you? Prove it."
"All right." Strickley took two pompoms in her hands, waved them in the air, and began to cheer. "Hup two, three, four, who are we for!" She did a roll-to handstand and a back flip. "The Mad Dog Corps! Go, Mad Dogs! Go, Mad Dogs!" Pass the ball! Make the pass! Brake 'em!" A spring off the high desk, toss the pompoms in the air, triple flip in the air, land on feet, catch the pom-poms and split, all in less than a minute. "We score!"
The Bailiff's mouth was wide open.
"Was the pride of the Class of '79."
"79? You were eighteen when you graduated, it's 2002 now...that makes you forty-one! Wow..."
"I went grey early. It's hereditary. I'm only forty-one, I still have my agility."
"I guess."
"Perhaps I've been a little harsh on teenagers." She glanced at the yellow pompoms with nostalgia. "I've forgotten that I was one once."
"We all were. But still, I thought you were much older?"
"How old?"
"Doesn't matter..."
"How old?!"
"But..."
"HOW OLD?!"
The Bailiff gulped. "Sixty-seven."
********************************************************************************************
Within five minutes, an ambulance roared through Middleton.
"Hurry!" yelled the Head Paramedic to the EMTs. "There's a bailiff with a pom-pom stuck in his mouth!"
*******************************************************************************************
Shego held the phone receiver in one hand, the other hand twirling the cord. She was back in her original outfit. "Another one of your stupid plans has gone under."
"Hey, Thomas Edison tried a hundred times before he succeeded."
"Do you have another plan ready?
"Of course! Every plan has a backup, and every backup has a fallback. It may not work, but I have a plan."
"Hope it's better than this one. Did you really think you could keep up the pretense of 'reformed'?"
"It almost worked!"
"Yeah, but you had to open your mouth!"
"Well...how was I supposed to know the buffoon had a recording device on him?! Anyway, I know we'll succeed with another blow--" There was a click. "Shego? Shego?"
**************************************************************************************
"Wade!"
"Yeah, Mom?"
"There's someone here to see you."
Wade turned around in his computer chair, nearly choking on the candy bar he was snacking on. "Lin? How on earth did you find me?! Not even Kim and Ron can and I supply them with plenty of tracking equipment!"
Lin wrinkled her nose as she stepped over a bag of potato chips. "All the cholesterol! Remind me to tell you about nature's seven food groups--"
"Chocolate, fizzy, fruit-flavored, fried, salty, gooey, and frozen?"
"I rest my case."
***********************************************************************************
The salesmen brought in the crate. "One nightstand, in A-1 condition. Sign here."
Ron did so.
"Need assistance in carrying this out?"
"No. Kim and I can handle it."
"Yeah. Kim Possible can handle anything."
Kim shrugged. "No big."
"Ready, KP?"
"Ready, Ron."
Both took hold of the crate and lifted.
Ron felt his grip weaken. Despite his efforts to hold on, his hands lost contact with the box. "Oops."
Kim grabbed the box and held it before it could hit the ground. "I can't believe they thought you lifted those gems, Mr. Too-Weak-to-Handle-Anything-Heavier-than-a-naked-mole-rat." Crack. She squealed and dropped the box. "I BROKE A NAIL!"
"Eeep!" Rufus leaped out of the box and caught the crate before it hit the floor. His little body struggled to keep it steady.
"Kim?"
"Yeah, Ron?"
"Delaney's delivers."
"Oh...good..."
The End
"Why, Bettina," said the Bailiff as the two crossed the street. "It's convenient to have a bistro that's right across the street." He opened the door to the Courthouse Cafe. "After you."
Strickley entered. "I see the rest of the court beat us here."
Ron glanced at his sandwich as Rufus tunneled into it. "I ordered extra tomato on my BLT."
Phobe lifted the bread on his own plate. There were three slices of tomato. "I think they switched ours." They swapped. The police officer lifted his new sandwich to his lips as Rufus peeked his head out. "AAAAUGH!"
Rufus gasped, then giggled.
Ron picked up the naked mole rat and stuck him in his pocket. "Rufus, I enjoy a good practical joke as much as you do, but don't you think that's going a little too far?"
The pink rodent shook his head.
"Oh, fine, but I'm not paying the medical bills when the poor guy has a heart attack."
"Party pooper," squeaked Rufus.
Kim held out a plate of scallops. "Try these, your honor. They're delicious."
The judge glared. "I'm allergic to bivalves. A good lawyer would know that."
"I'm sorry. I'll see if the cooks can cater more to your shellfish demands."
"I caught that!"
Drakken sat down at Ron's table. "Want to take a five-minute polygraph test?"
"No. You've probably rigged the needle to go up no matter what I say." Ron picked up his tray and walked to the other side of the restaurant.
"Chicken!" yelled the mad scientist after him.
Shego rushed forward with a roast chicken on a platter.
Phobe screamed. "There's a mouse in that corner!"
Marguerite wrinkled her nose. "It's just a ball of dust."
"Well, that ball of dust is walking and has a tail!"
"Oh, for J. Edgar Hoover's sake!"
Marguerite snatched up the 'mouse' and held it up. "Dust bunny. How on earth can you fear mice? You've faced far worse. Terrorists. Armed bank robbers. Rabid dogs. Evil girl scouts and their cookies of doom!"
"At least girl scouts don't carry plague."
"That's fleas," corrected Lin.
"Or malaria."
"Anopheles mosquito," snapped Lin, turning to her salad and punching in figures on a fancy calculator. "64 ounces of pure water, one pound of lettuce..."
Marguerite turned to her plate. "Mmm."
Yurin whipped out his fork. Crunch! Snort! Crinkle! Slice! Munch, munch, munch! Chomp! Slice! Burp!
"I feel like such an amateur," groaned Officer Oakes.
Drakken went to the dessert tray. On the plate was a single sugar cookie.
Shego appeared beside him. "Guess who's gonna get that cookie."
"I'm the boss!"
"And I'm the one who cleans your stupid lair!"
"Age before beauty!"
"Pearls before swine!"
"I want it!" Drakken jumped up and down. "I saw it first!"
"I'll flip you for it."
"Sure."
Shego took her boss's arm, flipped him over her head, and snatched the prize.
Drakken kicked his feet and pounded his fists in the classic temper tantrum. "WAAAAH!"
"Oh, fine, you big baby," Shego broke the cookie in half and handed over the bigger piece.
Phobe took out a sprig of mistletoe, then held it over Shego's head. She frowned, put on her black glove and fired a green ray from it. The sprig roasted.
Marguerite read from a printout. "Wanted in eleven countries. Well versed in her ABCs: Armed robbery, bombing, conspiracy, disguise, extortion, etc. Victims have stammered various descriptions, but all agree on pale skin, long black hair, and green and black clothes. Darn it, Phobe. I'd like to say this is a step up from hitting on me, but I'm just not sure."
The Kimmunicator beeped. Kim pulled it out. "Make it count, Wade."
"Small update. The stolen hand drill was found in an ER trash can, painted pink. No fingerprints."
"Who on earth would rob a hardware store, steal only a hand drill, paint it pink, then throw it away?"
"Search me. Middleton has some pretty strange crooks.
Kim looked in Drakken and Shego's direction. "That goes without saying."
*************************************************************************
Ten minutes later, everyone was back in the courtroom.
Hettie Cephalus had already been sworn in.
"Is it true, Ms. Cephalus, that you are a zoologist specializing in Family Bathyergidae."
"That I am."
"And that the defendant's pet is a naked mole rat?"
"Very fine specimen."
"Can a naked mole rat chew through a concrete safe?"
"Their jaw muscles are powerful enough."
"Ms. Cephalus, does that prove that this particular naked mole rat chewed through that safe?" interjected Kim.
"No. It just proves it could have."
Drakken elbowed his opponent out of the way. "I call my final witness. Officer Yurin Deeptrouble."
Ron felt his throat tighten.
The oath process was repeated.
Drakken turned to the cop. "What did you find at the crime scene?"
"We found our thief had forced a window and left no fingerprints or footprints. We took this photograph of the safe. The last thing we found was this black beret with blonde hairs stuck to it."
"And everyone knows Kim Possible's sidekick can barely keep his head on straight, much less his hat!" called Drakken out gleefully.
"How do you know someone else didn't just dye his hair blond and steal the necklace?" inquired Kim.
"These hairs are blonde all the way to the root."
Drakken cleared his throat, which was getting sore from asking all the questions. At least being the king of the world wouldn't require so much vocal effort. "You may step down, Officer. The prosecution rests."
"Defense," called the judge. "Call your first witness."
Kim faced the jury. "I'm sure you're all tired of hearing Drakken blow his horn."
"Honk!" The myriad jury members all blew their noses.
Shego clamped one hand over her mouth and ran into an alcove. Her laughter echoed through the courthouse.
Kim wiped her forehead. "Your honor, may I take a brief restbit?"
"Fine, Miss Possible. Five minutes -- and I'm counting!"
Kim took Lin's shoulder and eased her out of the courtroom. "I need your help."
"For what?"
"I need you to be my witness."
"WHAT?! I haven't spoken to a crowd since Whiz Kid."
"That show was then. This is now. Now get thee to the witness stand!"
"I will not!"
Kim let out a deep breath, knocking her classmate over. "Yes, you will." She threw open the courtroom doors. "Your honor, I call Miss Lin Vincibel to the stand to rebuke the testimonies."
Lin adjusted her glasses, and sat crossly in the witness box. "I'm not saying anything. I hate her."
Judge Strickley looked quizzically at Kim. "You two...know each other?"
"Yes, she's my classmate."
"That would explain the hostility," hissed the Bailiff, holding out the Kim Possible episode script.
Lin stood up. "Get that thing away from me."
"Lynnette Elizabeth Vincibel!" called Phobe. "On behalf of your parents, I command you not to leave that box until told to do so!"
"All right, Uncle. I give up." She placed her right hand on the script. "In the name of justice, in the name of honesty, and in the name of all that is fair, I, Lynnette Elizabeth Vincibel do solemnly pledge to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth."
Kim took the photograph from the evidence envelope. "The Prosecution believes that Rufus chewed a hole through the safe. Tell me, by what you see in that picture, does their statement hold water?"
The witness stared hard at the picture for two solid minutes. "No," she concluded. "The Prosecution's statement is a sieve."
"How do you know?!" snapped Drakken.
"Because these marks were not made by a naked mole rat. They were made by a 2002 Constructo-Works G-6000 hand drill!"
"I object!" the mad scientist shrieked. "That's simply your opinion."
The judge turned to Lin. "Is it?"
"It's a fact," she replied. "Would you like me to explain?"
Kim grinned smugly. "I would love to hear this."
"So would I," chorused the jury.
"It's simple," Lin began. "First off, no animal could have made the hole. The marks are too even and too perfect. Most hand drills can drill through concrete, but would wear as it got along. Didn't happen here. The drill bit stayed sharp and cut smooth. There are only two sets capable of this type of work: the Constructo-Work's G-series and the Holey Tools' Widowmaker. The Widowmaker is way too massive for one person to hold. So are the G-1000 through G-5000. The G-7000 can fit into the palm of a hand, but doesn't have enough power to drill through a foot-thick concrete safe in that short of a time. Therefore, the drill was the slightly-larger G-6000."
"Well, that just about clears up everything."
Drakken was down, but not out. "That still doesn't disprove that the buffoon didn't commit the crime!"
"By the way," Lin began. "How did the thief leave the Clutchcoin house?"
"The back gate, you simpleton!"
"How? The back gate was nearly impossible to force. Even if had been pried open, the alarm would have gone off."
"That's true," added Al.
"My guess is that the thief climbed the fence," stated Lin.
"Now what idiot would be stupid enough to climb a barbed wire fence?!"
"I learned from experience Ron doesn't have the stamina to climb any fence, must less a barbed wire one," Kim put in.
"Hey!" complained Ron.
"Well, you don't!"
"But did you have to throw me over that fence?!"
The Kimmunicator beeped. Kim yanked it out. "Go, Wade."
"I want the entire court to hear this."
Kim went to the TV and plugged in the Kimmunicator. Wade's face appeared on the screen.
Wade held up a printout. "Dr. Gench of the Middleton Legacy Memorial Hospital says he examined a teenager who matches Ron's description. This guy came in with a sliced arm. And when the doctor took an X-ray of the arm to check for fractures, he found a piece of barbed stuck in the wound."
"Eeew..." went the Twelve.
"Gross indeed," commented Kim.
"But that's not all," continued Wade.
"Spit it out!" yelled the jury.
"Three colorless diamonds were found in his possession."
Drakken clenched his fists and growled. "I told him to sell them!"
Everyone in the courtroom gasped.
Shego smacked her forehead. Way to go, ship sinker.
Judge Strickley stared coldly at the loose-lipped lawyer. "Do you have something to say to the court, Dr. Drakken?"
"Well, um, no..."
"Actually, he does!" called out Ron, flipping back his shirt collar. Imbedded in the fabric was a tiny silver chip, apparently of Wade's creation. Rufus popped it in a black box and pushed a button.
"It means when the media finds you've been convicted of a crime, they'll suspect Kim Possible, since a buffoon like you couldn't possibly pull off a scheme this big! Kim Possible's name will be dragged through the mud. No one will ever trust her again. And I'll finally be free to conquer the world!" came Drakken's voice.
"But what about being reformed? Seeing the light? Your crusade in the name of justice?" Ron was asking.
"Ha ha ha! Only an idiot would believe such a mad scientist's promises! Thanks to Shego, I cheated my way to the perfect score! And you have no way of stopping me! Ha ha ha!"
Drakken wanted the floor to swallow him up. Trapped by my own gloating! Shego was right. I must learn to keep my big mouth shut.
"Shame on you!" chorused the Twelve.
Miranda Wright frowned. "You have the right to remain silent."
The femme fatale knew her rights and choose to exercise this particular one, shooting a poisonous glance at her redhaired nemesis.
"This is not over, Kim Possible!" yelled Drakken as several guards yanked him out of the room. "You think you're all that, but you're not!"
Once the pair had left, Judge Strickley cleared her throat. "In light of this development...I'd like to dismiss any and all charges against Ronald Stoppable. Court adjourned."
A cheer went up in the courtroom.
Ron leaped out of his seat. "Boo-yah!" Then remembering where he was, added, "Thank you, your honor."
"See, Yurin? You can trust teenagers." Marguerite kissed her partner on the cheek.
"Oooh!" went the
Yurin blushed red. "And earthly power doth then show likest the highest when mercy seasons justice."
Lin stepped down from the witness box. "Kim, you did it. But with suffering comes guilt. I will never let you forget this."
"Good work, Possible," congratulated Mr. Barkin. Then he heard a voice that made his blood run cold.
"Oh, Stevie!" Amy Hall, known to the world as DNAmy, ran in, arms wide.
Miranda consulted her clipboard. "Amy, aren't you supposed to be at the movies right now?" Oh, well. She's not dangerous, just a bit crazy. And lovesick. No, wait. She is dangerous.
"It's so lonely going to the movies by my self," Amy whispered. "I like to go with a date that lets me cry on his shoulder."
Steve Barkin had heard enough. He did the natural thing -- bolted.
"Now, Stevie, you come back here!"
The crowd began to disperse.
When the courtroom was empty except for the Bailiff and the judge. The Bailiff was holding a box. "I have to deliver this to Middleton High."
Judge Strickley lifted the flap. "Pompoms?"
"Yup. They wore the old ones out."
"Bailiff, did you know I was a graduate of Middleton High?"
"Yeah. I also know you were an Honors student."
"Bet you didn't know I was captain of the cheerleading squad."
"Were you? Prove it."
"All right." Strickley took two pompoms in her hands, waved them in the air, and began to cheer. "Hup two, three, four, who are we for!" She did a roll-to handstand and a back flip. "The Mad Dog Corps! Go, Mad Dogs! Go, Mad Dogs!" Pass the ball! Make the pass! Brake 'em!" A spring off the high desk, toss the pompoms in the air, triple flip in the air, land on feet, catch the pom-poms and split, all in less than a minute. "We score!"
The Bailiff's mouth was wide open.
"Was the pride of the Class of '79."
"79? You were eighteen when you graduated, it's 2002 now...that makes you forty-one! Wow..."
"I went grey early. It's hereditary. I'm only forty-one, I still have my agility."
"I guess."
"Perhaps I've been a little harsh on teenagers." She glanced at the yellow pompoms with nostalgia. "I've forgotten that I was one once."
"We all were. But still, I thought you were much older?"
"How old?"
"Doesn't matter..."
"How old?!"
"But..."
"HOW OLD?!"
The Bailiff gulped. "Sixty-seven."
********************************************************************************************
Within five minutes, an ambulance roared through Middleton.
"Hurry!" yelled the Head Paramedic to the EMTs. "There's a bailiff with a pom-pom stuck in his mouth!"
*******************************************************************************************
Shego held the phone receiver in one hand, the other hand twirling the cord. She was back in her original outfit. "Another one of your stupid plans has gone under."
"Hey, Thomas Edison tried a hundred times before he succeeded."
"Do you have another plan ready?
"Of course! Every plan has a backup, and every backup has a fallback. It may not work, but I have a plan."
"Hope it's better than this one. Did you really think you could keep up the pretense of 'reformed'?"
"It almost worked!"
"Yeah, but you had to open your mouth!"
"Well...how was I supposed to know the buffoon had a recording device on him?! Anyway, I know we'll succeed with another blow--" There was a click. "Shego? Shego?"
**************************************************************************************
"Wade!"
"Yeah, Mom?"
"There's someone here to see you."
Wade turned around in his computer chair, nearly choking on the candy bar he was snacking on. "Lin? How on earth did you find me?! Not even Kim and Ron can and I supply them with plenty of tracking equipment!"
Lin wrinkled her nose as she stepped over a bag of potato chips. "All the cholesterol! Remind me to tell you about nature's seven food groups--"
"Chocolate, fizzy, fruit-flavored, fried, salty, gooey, and frozen?"
"I rest my case."
***********************************************************************************
The salesmen brought in the crate. "One nightstand, in A-1 condition. Sign here."
Ron did so.
"Need assistance in carrying this out?"
"No. Kim and I can handle it."
"Yeah. Kim Possible can handle anything."
Kim shrugged. "No big."
"Ready, KP?"
"Ready, Ron."
Both took hold of the crate and lifted.
Ron felt his grip weaken. Despite his efforts to hold on, his hands lost contact with the box. "Oops."
Kim grabbed the box and held it before it could hit the ground. "I can't believe they thought you lifted those gems, Mr. Too-Weak-to-Handle-Anything-Heavier-than-a-naked-mole-rat." Crack. She squealed and dropped the box. "I BROKE A NAIL!"
"Eeep!" Rufus leaped out of the box and caught the crate before it hit the floor. His little body struggled to keep it steady.
"Kim?"
"Yeah, Ron?"
"Delaney's delivers."
"Oh...good..."
The End