The Final Fantasy Epic Stars!
Hello, once again, folks to my show! In episode two of my series, we will be interviewing Yuffie Kisaragi and Cid Highwind about Yuffie's increasing Materia theft. I hope you left all materia at home folks! I am Danielle, your host, and this is my show. Enjoy!
(Episode Two: Materia Hunter Yuffie)
Danielle: Hello everyone! Now, before I introduce my first guest, did you all lock up your materia like I asked?
(Audience nods)
Danielle: Okay then. Seph, stand guard. you never know what she'll do.
(Sephiroth stands beside the desk, looking totally bored. Rufus Shin-ra is running the lights, and Hojo's assistant Mervin is running the camera.)
Danielle: Now, for my first guest, The great materia hunter and future lady of Wutai, Yuffie Kisaragi!
(Everyone claps and when she comes in, I shake her hand as she sits on the sofa)
Danielle: Hi Yuffie. I'm glad you could be here today.
Yuffie: Hello Danielle, it's great to be here. Do you have any materia?
Danielle: Don't even think about it girl.
Yuffie: Rats! (she waves at Rufus) Hi Rufie honey!
(Rufus sweatdrops)
Rufus: My name is not 'Rufie' it's Rufus! Can't you get it right brat?
Danielle: Rufus, don't antagonize the guests. Now Yuffie, I see you are straight to the point about the materia. Care to explain your infatuation with the magical orbs?
Yuffie: Sure. When Sephiroth led the Shinra to victory in the Wutai war... my homeland was discraced and became a tourist trap. My father, Godo, was totally humiliated and wanted nothing to do with Wutai anymore. I wouldn't stand for that so I told him off and left Wutai to gather materia so we could become the mighty nation we once were.
Sephiroth: That wasn't my fault. I only did as ordered Yuffie. Don't hate me.
Yuffie: I don't, but you are still in trouble for summoning Meteor. You have to go clean up Midgar.
Sephiroth: By myself!?!?!?
Yuffie: Duh! Of course not! You're only one man and Hojo's monsters have increased their population there.
Danielle: I'll help.
Yuffie: So will Avalanche.
(Avalanche is at the villa in Costa del Sol watching everything. Cloud spits out his coke.)
Cloud: WHAT!?!?
Tifa: When I get a hold of her...
Barret: That lousy b*&^h!!
(Back at the studio)
Yuffie: Uhhh.... did I forget to tell them again? (puts a hand on her chin and thinks)
Danielle: Yuffie, if I may ask, what is your favorite materia?
Yuffie: That's easy! I have two favorites! Leviathan, because he's the Wutaian water god, and Phoenix, because she's the Wutaian goddess of life!
Danielle:(looking at audience) Now, for my next guest, He's the best pilot since the time of Setzer Giabanni and he has the swear words for the title. Yuffie's father figure and fellow Avalanche member, Cid Highwind!
(Everyone claps and I shake his hand as he sits on the chair)
Danielle: Cid, this is a no smoking area.
Cid: Screw that!
Danielle: Cid...
Cid: I will not throw away my precious cigarette!
Sephiroth: Get rid of it Highwind or face the consequences...
(He unsheathes the Masamune and holds it in front of his face)
(Cid pales and Reno runs onstage swiping the cigarette and throws it away)
Cid: Damn it!
Danielle: Oh shut up, you can have one later. Now, what made you become Yuffie's father figure?
Cid: Well... a few years ago, I had a wife before I met Shera. We had a kid and his name was Joseph. My wife's name was Scarlet.
(In the Villa...)
(Cloud spits out another mouthful of coke and all of Avalanche's jaws drop to the floor.)
Tifa: Cid... and that bi&^h Scarlet!?
Barret: Oh my dear f&^%ing gods...
Vincent: ....
(In the studio)
Cid: Yeah, Scarlet the Head of Weapons in Shinra. Anyway, we divorced soon after Joseph was born and I got custody of him. He grew up liking planes just as much as me. We were flying one day and we had an engine problem. We crashed....and Joseph didn't make it. Yuffie reminded me of Joseph so much. She had told us how Godo always fought with her and I realized she was lonely. So, I sort of became her father figure since Godo was doing a lousy job.
Yuffie: Wow... (she wipes a tear) ... Cid... you're the best!
(Danielle smiles)
Danielle: What is your opinon about Yuffie's constant materia theft though Cid?
Cid: I really don't like it, but I understand her goal. I'll help her re- build Wutai....but I want you to stop stealing stuff...ok Yuffie?
Yuffie: Ok! (she hugs Cid) Thanks!
Audience: Awww....
(Suddenly, a crash is heard from backstage and muffled cursing)
(Danielle hits her intercom)
Danielle: Reno! What the hell is going on back there!?!?
Reno: We have a psycho b*&^h who wants to see Cid!
Rude: This woman is supposed to be dead! Battle stations Danielle, It's Scarlet!!
(Intercom goes dead as Scarlet runs onstage, her hair singed and a burn going up her left arm. She's still dressed in a red dress.)
Scarlet: Cid! You BA#%^&D!!! YOU KILLED JOSEPH!!!
(Scarlet pulls out a gun)
Scarlet: Go to hell Cid!!
(She fires, but Yuffie jumps in front of Cid and takes it for him)
(Yuffie falls into his lap, her left side bleeding)
Cid: Yuffie!!
(Sephiroth runs forward, sword drawn and Danielle pulls out her gun, jumps over her desk, and begins shooting the hell out of Scarlet)
Scarlet: Ugh! Damn... you... Cid...
(Scarlet dies)
Danielle: Reno! Get Scarlet's lousy corpse off of my set and Rude, quick call an ambulance!
(Reno and Rude get to work)
(A few mins later, Yuffie is carried away on a stretcher cursing Scarlet and Cid is at her side, using every swear word in his extensive vocabulary effectively naming Scarlet each time.)
Danielle: This has been another exciting episode of....
The Final Fantasy Epic Stars!
Sephiroth: Hurry Danielle, let's follow the ambulance.
Danielle: Ok. I'll see you all next week, same time, same place, when I have a special guest on the show! I'm not going to tell you who though! See you all then!
(Lights dim as Danielle and Sephiroth run out to Danielle's blue mustang and follow Yuffie to the hospital)
Author's Notes: Ok you guys, what did you think!? I want reviews for this chapter! Just so I won't get flamed, I want to say that I have no thing against Yuffie, in fact she's one of my top three favorites! Sephiroth and Aeris being #1 and #2. I had to do something dramatic to set up the next episode. All flames go to MellowMoonGirl@Aol.com and all compliments go to princess_quistis@hotmail.com
To all those who care, I need a special guest! I was thinking Aeris, Cloud, and Tifa, but that's too obvious. Someone care to send me ideas? Please?
Again, Squaresoft owns all these fabulous people except for Danielle, she's mine. (I still wanna own Sephy soooooo much!!!)
L8A!!!
Hello, once again, folks to my show! In episode two of my series, we will be interviewing Yuffie Kisaragi and Cid Highwind about Yuffie's increasing Materia theft. I hope you left all materia at home folks! I am Danielle, your host, and this is my show. Enjoy!
(Episode Two: Materia Hunter Yuffie)
Danielle: Hello everyone! Now, before I introduce my first guest, did you all lock up your materia like I asked?
(Audience nods)
Danielle: Okay then. Seph, stand guard. you never know what she'll do.
(Sephiroth stands beside the desk, looking totally bored. Rufus Shin-ra is running the lights, and Hojo's assistant Mervin is running the camera.)
Danielle: Now, for my first guest, The great materia hunter and future lady of Wutai, Yuffie Kisaragi!
(Everyone claps and when she comes in, I shake her hand as she sits on the sofa)
Danielle: Hi Yuffie. I'm glad you could be here today.
Yuffie: Hello Danielle, it's great to be here. Do you have any materia?
Danielle: Don't even think about it girl.
Yuffie: Rats! (she waves at Rufus) Hi Rufie honey!
(Rufus sweatdrops)
Rufus: My name is not 'Rufie' it's Rufus! Can't you get it right brat?
Danielle: Rufus, don't antagonize the guests. Now Yuffie, I see you are straight to the point about the materia. Care to explain your infatuation with the magical orbs?
Yuffie: Sure. When Sephiroth led the Shinra to victory in the Wutai war... my homeland was discraced and became a tourist trap. My father, Godo, was totally humiliated and wanted nothing to do with Wutai anymore. I wouldn't stand for that so I told him off and left Wutai to gather materia so we could become the mighty nation we once were.
Sephiroth: That wasn't my fault. I only did as ordered Yuffie. Don't hate me.
Yuffie: I don't, but you are still in trouble for summoning Meteor. You have to go clean up Midgar.
Sephiroth: By myself!?!?!?
Yuffie: Duh! Of course not! You're only one man and Hojo's monsters have increased their population there.
Danielle: I'll help.
Yuffie: So will Avalanche.
(Avalanche is at the villa in Costa del Sol watching everything. Cloud spits out his coke.)
Cloud: WHAT!?!?
Tifa: When I get a hold of her...
Barret: That lousy b*&^h!!
(Back at the studio)
Yuffie: Uhhh.... did I forget to tell them again? (puts a hand on her chin and thinks)
Danielle: Yuffie, if I may ask, what is your favorite materia?
Yuffie: That's easy! I have two favorites! Leviathan, because he's the Wutaian water god, and Phoenix, because she's the Wutaian goddess of life!
Danielle:(looking at audience) Now, for my next guest, He's the best pilot since the time of Setzer Giabanni and he has the swear words for the title. Yuffie's father figure and fellow Avalanche member, Cid Highwind!
(Everyone claps and I shake his hand as he sits on the chair)
Danielle: Cid, this is a no smoking area.
Cid: Screw that!
Danielle: Cid...
Cid: I will not throw away my precious cigarette!
Sephiroth: Get rid of it Highwind or face the consequences...
(He unsheathes the Masamune and holds it in front of his face)
(Cid pales and Reno runs onstage swiping the cigarette and throws it away)
Cid: Damn it!
Danielle: Oh shut up, you can have one later. Now, what made you become Yuffie's father figure?
Cid: Well... a few years ago, I had a wife before I met Shera. We had a kid and his name was Joseph. My wife's name was Scarlet.
(In the Villa...)
(Cloud spits out another mouthful of coke and all of Avalanche's jaws drop to the floor.)
Tifa: Cid... and that bi&^h Scarlet!?
Barret: Oh my dear f&^%ing gods...
Vincent: ....
(In the studio)
Cid: Yeah, Scarlet the Head of Weapons in Shinra. Anyway, we divorced soon after Joseph was born and I got custody of him. He grew up liking planes just as much as me. We were flying one day and we had an engine problem. We crashed....and Joseph didn't make it. Yuffie reminded me of Joseph so much. She had told us how Godo always fought with her and I realized she was lonely. So, I sort of became her father figure since Godo was doing a lousy job.
Yuffie: Wow... (she wipes a tear) ... Cid... you're the best!
(Danielle smiles)
Danielle: What is your opinon about Yuffie's constant materia theft though Cid?
Cid: I really don't like it, but I understand her goal. I'll help her re- build Wutai....but I want you to stop stealing stuff...ok Yuffie?
Yuffie: Ok! (she hugs Cid) Thanks!
Audience: Awww....
(Suddenly, a crash is heard from backstage and muffled cursing)
(Danielle hits her intercom)
Danielle: Reno! What the hell is going on back there!?!?
Reno: We have a psycho b*&^h who wants to see Cid!
Rude: This woman is supposed to be dead! Battle stations Danielle, It's Scarlet!!
(Intercom goes dead as Scarlet runs onstage, her hair singed and a burn going up her left arm. She's still dressed in a red dress.)
Scarlet: Cid! You BA#%^&D!!! YOU KILLED JOSEPH!!!
(Scarlet pulls out a gun)
Scarlet: Go to hell Cid!!
(She fires, but Yuffie jumps in front of Cid and takes it for him)
(Yuffie falls into his lap, her left side bleeding)
Cid: Yuffie!!
(Sephiroth runs forward, sword drawn and Danielle pulls out her gun, jumps over her desk, and begins shooting the hell out of Scarlet)
Scarlet: Ugh! Damn... you... Cid...
(Scarlet dies)
Danielle: Reno! Get Scarlet's lousy corpse off of my set and Rude, quick call an ambulance!
(Reno and Rude get to work)
(A few mins later, Yuffie is carried away on a stretcher cursing Scarlet and Cid is at her side, using every swear word in his extensive vocabulary effectively naming Scarlet each time.)
Danielle: This has been another exciting episode of....
The Final Fantasy Epic Stars!
Sephiroth: Hurry Danielle, let's follow the ambulance.
Danielle: Ok. I'll see you all next week, same time, same place, when I have a special guest on the show! I'm not going to tell you who though! See you all then!
(Lights dim as Danielle and Sephiroth run out to Danielle's blue mustang and follow Yuffie to the hospital)
Author's Notes: Ok you guys, what did you think!? I want reviews for this chapter! Just so I won't get flamed, I want to say that I have no thing against Yuffie, in fact she's one of my top three favorites! Sephiroth and Aeris being #1 and #2. I had to do something dramatic to set up the next episode. All flames go to MellowMoonGirl@Aol.com and all compliments go to princess_quistis@hotmail.com
To all those who care, I need a special guest! I was thinking Aeris, Cloud, and Tifa, but that's too obvious. Someone care to send me ideas? Please?
Again, Squaresoft owns all these fabulous people except for Danielle, she's mine. (I still wanna own Sephy soooooo much!!!)
L8A!!!