A red curtain opens. We see Mr. Escobar standing alone with his infamous blue scarf. He raises his hand and the instrumental version of "Jumpin' Jack Flash" plays.
Backstage, Larry shakes his head slowly.
Larry: Whit had to be at least smelling this stuff when she wrote this.
Whit: (appears suddenly) Actually, no. I was in first period, bored and listening to a very off-key version of "White Christmas."
Larry: Miss Wilson! (salutes)
Whit: Shut it, Tudgeman.
Outside, we see these words come behind Mr. Escobar.
I DO NOT OWN LIZZIE MCGUIRE OR MOULIN ROUGE! I ALSO DO NOT OWN CHICO OR KYLE! THEY BELONG TO ELI'S GIRL! I command you to go read her Chico chronicles! Go, now!
The flash off, then
"A Very Physho Production"
HILLRIDGE ROUGE!
Finally,
California, 2002
Miranda stands alone in the corner of the screen. She opens her mouth and begins to sing.
There once was a boy
A very strange indeed boy
He was, uhh
Very kind?
We pan into a middle class suburb. There are various seventh grade children lying around with bottles labeled "Cardio Punch" gripped in their white-knuckled hands. A few other teens have their trechcoats open, revealing various objects, such as watches and Pokemon
cards. A young adult man whom is quite short runs in front of the camera. He waves his hands.
Mr. Dig: Don't go in! It is a suburb run by teenagers! It is a predictable suburb of EVIL!
Cameraperson ignores him and scurries into the suburb. Somehow, we magically fly into the air above it and into a window of one of the houses that looks just like the others. The room is littered with empty bags of cheesy puffs and bottle of Cardio Punch. There is a
lone boy in a corner. His head is lowered and his knees are brought up. He is wearing all black. His eyes look up. This boy is David "Gordo" Gordon and he is a talented writer and director. Gordo struggles to stand, but he does. He walks to his desk and wipes off the
empty bags and bottles. He flips on his laptop and begins to type.
Gordo Voice Over: The greatest thing you will ever learn is just to love and be loved in
return.
The Hillridge Rouge- A nightclub, a hangout, a coffeehouse! Run by one Matt McGuire, a fifth grader whom was very talented with money. It was the home of the mysterious and beautiful Fashionettes of Hillridge Junior High. The most beautiful was Elizabeth Brooke
McGuire, but everyone referred to her as simply Lizzie. She was the woman I loved. I had loved her forever but did not realize it until it was far too late. Her time was almost up when I realized it. The woman I love is dead. I first came to Hillridge Junior High a year ago and it was not as my father had described it-
Mr. Gordon: (accent and all) A junior high of sin!
-Oh, no. It was the center of the Californian revolution! Artists, musicians, dancers, jocks, and cheerleaders alike all flocked to this site. People of all cliques were joining the revolution. I came to live the penniless life of a normal teenager and to write and direct films, my two greatest passions along with the belief of truth, beauty, freedom and most importantly, love. There was just one tiny problem---I had never been in love! Yes, it is awful, isn't it?
Mr. Gordon: Always this obsession with love! First Frank Sinatra, then love!
Gordo Voice Over: Just then, an unconscious jock fell through my roof!
Ethan is dangling upside-down through the roof with a rope tied to his ankle.
Gordo Voice Over: Followed by an artist and musician dressed as a cheerleader.
Miranda rushes into room with a Wildcat's uniform on.
Miranda: I'm so sorry! He has this condition -- Perfectly normal one minute, so incredibly stupid the next. He saw a penny on the ground and somehow fell through.
Larry, Lanny, and Kate peek their heads through the hole and stare down. Lanny has a ton of makeup on.
Kate: Miranda, who will play his part?! ME?!
Miranda: No, Kate. Duh. (turns to Gordo) You wanna?
Gordo: Uhh... Sure. I guess.
Gordo Voice-over: Before I knew it, they had taken me upstairs and dressed me in Ethan's costume which was four sizes too big.
(Ethan is lying on a bed sleeping and muttering about giant yellow bunnies. Lanny is standing in the middle of the room blinking. Kate is attempting to sing a song while playing the piano at the same time. Larry and Miranda are waltzing around together to the music. Gordo is just staring wide-eyed from the top of a ladder.)
Kate: (singing) The school rings with the vibrant drums of band-geeks--
Larry: (stops dancing and stares at Kate) That is not possible. The school is built to withstand winds of up to--
Kate: (gives him the Hand) Like I care, dork!
Larry: How about the school lives with the vibrance of truth?
(Lanny shakes his head.)
Miranda: (sings) The school dances with the love of beauty?
(Lanny still shakes his head)
Miranda: (gives Lanny a warning glare) I want you to stop that head shaking right now, young man.
(Lanny stops on command)
Gordo: What abou-
Ethan: (suddenly wakes up) The school sings for COOKIES! Oooh... a shiny penny.... (falls over backwards)
(Everyone stares and then just goes back to arguing)
Gordo: The school is ali--
Larry: No, no, no! No squared!
Gordo: The school is alive w--
Miranda: That is it, Lanny! I am sick and tired of you! (pounds him)
Gordo: (sings) The school is alive with the sound of music!
(Everyone stops and stares in amazement)
Ethan: (wakes up) The school is alive! I love it!
Gordo: (smiles and continues) With songs it has sung for a thousand years.
Kate: (grins and strums the notes on her piano) Lovely, darling, simply lovely!
Ethan: (stands and walks to Gordo) You and Lanny shall write together!
Gordo voice-over: But this plan did not sit well with Lanny.
(Lanny holds up a "GOOD-BYE!" sign and slams the door shut)
All: O.O
Larry: (hyperventilating) WHAT WILL MATT SAY?! WHAT?! (shakes people by the shoulders) THE HUMANITY!! THE HUMANITY!!!
Miranda: Uhh... (brushes Larry's hands off her shoulders) What he is trying to say, Gordo is, that... No offense, but have you ever written anything like this before?
Ethan: So what if he hasn't? The boy has talent! (throws arms out but accidentally hits Gordo somewhere *ahem* bad) Er, (blush) not any funny business or anythin'. I just like talent.
Kate: Sure, Ethan, suuure...
Miranda: (drools) You have such a way with words, Ethan....
Gordo voice-over: But a shadow of doubt was in my head...
Mr. Gordon: You will waste your life at the Hillridge Rouge with a ditzy blonde!
Gordo: (looks at invisible watch) Oh wow, look at the time. I must be going now... (edges to hole in floor) I don't think I can write Spectacular Spectacular for you.
All: (glare) WHAT?!
Gordo: I-I don't even know if I am a true Californian revolutionary!
Ethan: Do you believe in truth?
Gordo: Yes.
Kate: Beauty?
Gordo: Most certainly!
Larry: (in Braveheart voice) Freedom?
Gordo: Of course!
Miranda: (pauses and speaks quietly) Love?
Gordo: (stares straight at her) I believe in love above all else, Miranda. Love is like oxygen, it lifts us up where we belong! All you need is love!
All: (wipe away tears)
Miranda: (nods and smiles at her fellow Revolutionaries, doing that knowing/smiling/nodding thing... Oh, you probably know what I mean.) I knew it, Gordo! You are the true voice of the Revolution!
Gordo Voice-over: They devised a plan. I would wear Ethan's best suit that he had outgrown and be passed off as a high school student. Miranda was a close friend of Lizzie's and Matt's alike so she would arrange a private meeting between me and Miss McGuire. After hearing my poetry, she would insist to Matt that I write Spectacular Spectacular!
Miranda: Here is to your first Californian job! (holds out a tray of Cardio Punch and cheesy puffs)
Gordo Voice-over: That was when I would get my first taste of The Combo.
(All of the teens down the puffs and punch. Then, Melina the fairy comes from the puff logo.)
Melina: I'm the green insane playday posse member! (starts dancing and singing) The school is alive with the sound of music!
Revolutionaries: (sing and dance drunkenly) The school is aliiiiive! Freedom, beauty, truth and looooooooooooove!!!!
Gordo Voice-over: The next day, I was to meet Lizzie, the girl I would love forever...
~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***
Like?
P.S.--This fic was inspired by Blade Malfoy Celebare's "Gryffindor Rouge." I command you to read it! Go, now! *waves hand around*
Backstage, Larry shakes his head slowly.
Larry: Whit had to be at least smelling this stuff when she wrote this.
Whit: (appears suddenly) Actually, no. I was in first period, bored and listening to a very off-key version of "White Christmas."
Larry: Miss Wilson! (salutes)
Whit: Shut it, Tudgeman.
Outside, we see these words come behind Mr. Escobar.
I DO NOT OWN LIZZIE MCGUIRE OR MOULIN ROUGE! I ALSO DO NOT OWN CHICO OR KYLE! THEY BELONG TO ELI'S GIRL! I command you to go read her Chico chronicles! Go, now!
The flash off, then
"A Very Physho Production"
HILLRIDGE ROUGE!
Finally,
California, 2002
Miranda stands alone in the corner of the screen. She opens her mouth and begins to sing.
There once was a boy
A very strange indeed boy
He was, uhh
Very kind?
We pan into a middle class suburb. There are various seventh grade children lying around with bottles labeled "Cardio Punch" gripped in their white-knuckled hands. A few other teens have their trechcoats open, revealing various objects, such as watches and Pokemon
cards. A young adult man whom is quite short runs in front of the camera. He waves his hands.
Mr. Dig: Don't go in! It is a suburb run by teenagers! It is a predictable suburb of EVIL!
Cameraperson ignores him and scurries into the suburb. Somehow, we magically fly into the air above it and into a window of one of the houses that looks just like the others. The room is littered with empty bags of cheesy puffs and bottle of Cardio Punch. There is a
lone boy in a corner. His head is lowered and his knees are brought up. He is wearing all black. His eyes look up. This boy is David "Gordo" Gordon and he is a talented writer and director. Gordo struggles to stand, but he does. He walks to his desk and wipes off the
empty bags and bottles. He flips on his laptop and begins to type.
Gordo Voice Over: The greatest thing you will ever learn is just to love and be loved in
return.
The Hillridge Rouge- A nightclub, a hangout, a coffeehouse! Run by one Matt McGuire, a fifth grader whom was very talented with money. It was the home of the mysterious and beautiful Fashionettes of Hillridge Junior High. The most beautiful was Elizabeth Brooke
McGuire, but everyone referred to her as simply Lizzie. She was the woman I loved. I had loved her forever but did not realize it until it was far too late. Her time was almost up when I realized it. The woman I love is dead. I first came to Hillridge Junior High a year ago and it was not as my father had described it-
Mr. Gordon: (accent and all) A junior high of sin!
-Oh, no. It was the center of the Californian revolution! Artists, musicians, dancers, jocks, and cheerleaders alike all flocked to this site. People of all cliques were joining the revolution. I came to live the penniless life of a normal teenager and to write and direct films, my two greatest passions along with the belief of truth, beauty, freedom and most importantly, love. There was just one tiny problem---I had never been in love! Yes, it is awful, isn't it?
Mr. Gordon: Always this obsession with love! First Frank Sinatra, then love!
Gordo Voice Over: Just then, an unconscious jock fell through my roof!
Ethan is dangling upside-down through the roof with a rope tied to his ankle.
Gordo Voice Over: Followed by an artist and musician dressed as a cheerleader.
Miranda rushes into room with a Wildcat's uniform on.
Miranda: I'm so sorry! He has this condition -- Perfectly normal one minute, so incredibly stupid the next. He saw a penny on the ground and somehow fell through.
Larry, Lanny, and Kate peek their heads through the hole and stare down. Lanny has a ton of makeup on.
Kate: Miranda, who will play his part?! ME?!
Miranda: No, Kate. Duh. (turns to Gordo) You wanna?
Gordo: Uhh... Sure. I guess.
Gordo Voice-over: Before I knew it, they had taken me upstairs and dressed me in Ethan's costume which was four sizes too big.
(Ethan is lying on a bed sleeping and muttering about giant yellow bunnies. Lanny is standing in the middle of the room blinking. Kate is attempting to sing a song while playing the piano at the same time. Larry and Miranda are waltzing around together to the music. Gordo is just staring wide-eyed from the top of a ladder.)
Kate: (singing) The school rings with the vibrant drums of band-geeks--
Larry: (stops dancing and stares at Kate) That is not possible. The school is built to withstand winds of up to--
Kate: (gives him the Hand) Like I care, dork!
Larry: How about the school lives with the vibrance of truth?
(Lanny shakes his head.)
Miranda: (sings) The school dances with the love of beauty?
(Lanny still shakes his head)
Miranda: (gives Lanny a warning glare) I want you to stop that head shaking right now, young man.
(Lanny stops on command)
Gordo: What abou-
Ethan: (suddenly wakes up) The school sings for COOKIES! Oooh... a shiny penny.... (falls over backwards)
(Everyone stares and then just goes back to arguing)
Gordo: The school is ali--
Larry: No, no, no! No squared!
Gordo: The school is alive w--
Miranda: That is it, Lanny! I am sick and tired of you! (pounds him)
Gordo: (sings) The school is alive with the sound of music!
(Everyone stops and stares in amazement)
Ethan: (wakes up) The school is alive! I love it!
Gordo: (smiles and continues) With songs it has sung for a thousand years.
Kate: (grins and strums the notes on her piano) Lovely, darling, simply lovely!
Ethan: (stands and walks to Gordo) You and Lanny shall write together!
Gordo voice-over: But this plan did not sit well with Lanny.
(Lanny holds up a "GOOD-BYE!" sign and slams the door shut)
All: O.O
Larry: (hyperventilating) WHAT WILL MATT SAY?! WHAT?! (shakes people by the shoulders) THE HUMANITY!! THE HUMANITY!!!
Miranda: Uhh... (brushes Larry's hands off her shoulders) What he is trying to say, Gordo is, that... No offense, but have you ever written anything like this before?
Ethan: So what if he hasn't? The boy has talent! (throws arms out but accidentally hits Gordo somewhere *ahem* bad) Er, (blush) not any funny business or anythin'. I just like talent.
Kate: Sure, Ethan, suuure...
Miranda: (drools) You have such a way with words, Ethan....
Gordo voice-over: But a shadow of doubt was in my head...
Mr. Gordon: You will waste your life at the Hillridge Rouge with a ditzy blonde!
Gordo: (looks at invisible watch) Oh wow, look at the time. I must be going now... (edges to hole in floor) I don't think I can write Spectacular Spectacular for you.
All: (glare) WHAT?!
Gordo: I-I don't even know if I am a true Californian revolutionary!
Ethan: Do you believe in truth?
Gordo: Yes.
Kate: Beauty?
Gordo: Most certainly!
Larry: (in Braveheart voice) Freedom?
Gordo: Of course!
Miranda: (pauses and speaks quietly) Love?
Gordo: (stares straight at her) I believe in love above all else, Miranda. Love is like oxygen, it lifts us up where we belong! All you need is love!
All: (wipe away tears)
Miranda: (nods and smiles at her fellow Revolutionaries, doing that knowing/smiling/nodding thing... Oh, you probably know what I mean.) I knew it, Gordo! You are the true voice of the Revolution!
Gordo Voice-over: They devised a plan. I would wear Ethan's best suit that he had outgrown and be passed off as a high school student. Miranda was a close friend of Lizzie's and Matt's alike so she would arrange a private meeting between me and Miss McGuire. After hearing my poetry, she would insist to Matt that I write Spectacular Spectacular!
Miranda: Here is to your first Californian job! (holds out a tray of Cardio Punch and cheesy puffs)
Gordo Voice-over: That was when I would get my first taste of The Combo.
(All of the teens down the puffs and punch. Then, Melina the fairy comes from the puff logo.)
Melina: I'm the green insane playday posse member! (starts dancing and singing) The school is alive with the sound of music!
Revolutionaries: (sing and dance drunkenly) The school is aliiiiive! Freedom, beauty, truth and looooooooooooove!!!!
Gordo Voice-over: The next day, I was to meet Lizzie, the girl I would love forever...
~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***
Like?
P.S.--This fic was inspired by Blade Malfoy Celebare's "Gryffindor Rouge." I command you to read it! Go, now! *waves hand around*