A/N: Okey... so after a long hiatus of posting anything... i've decided to revamp my ending to this fic cuz .. to put things bluntly... i didn't like how i ended this story. so here's my re-write of the ending... hope you like this better... :) i decided that while i'm procrastinating from doing my STATS assignment... i decided why not change the ending... :)
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MAX heard a piercing scream and shut his eyes in horror. Suddenly the shrilling sound stopped. *Oh God. Liz...* Slowly he opened his eyes and prepared himself to see the lifeless body of his wife sprawled all over the floor in a pool of blood. What he saw was a woman dressed in black deliver a swift kick to Kivar in the back of his head. The energy beam missed Liz but it had created a big hole in the wall.
"WHO DARES TO STOP ME???" Kivar yelled with his eyes bulging and his face turning a deep crimson. He spun around to see Max smirking and in a fighting stance. Not only was Kivar shocked that a woman had dared to lay a hand (or foot) on him, it was a total stranger who didn't know who or what she was dealing with. His mouth gaped wide open.
"Who did you expect? The Easter bunny?" She laughed.
"You WITCH! I'll teach you to mess with Kivar!!!" He stretched out his hand and directed another energy beam at her. But Kivar also didn't know anything about the stranger. Max dodged the beam without even breaking a sweat.
"Is that all you got? Gotta do better than that, Kivar." This only aided in fuelling Kivar's anger. He threw a series of energy beams at her like a machine gun with each time Max stepping out of the way.
Throughout the whole fight, Liz had broken free from Kivar's hold, since he was busy concentrating on destroying the stranger who dared to intrude. Liz ran towards MAX, and this caught Kivar's attention. With anger sweltering inside him, he turned and aimed at Liz again intending to blow her tiny body into a thousand pieces. Max noticed Kivar's change in attention and charged towards him and before he could shoot the beam at Liz, she jerked his arm back and twisted it in a weird angle. The beam hit the ceiling right above Liz. It started to give way and big blocks of the ceiling came tumbling down. MAX screamed and suddenly he felt a burst of energy flow through him. He broke the chains that bound him and he aimed a beam straight at the block heading towards Liz. It shattered into dust and fell softly to the ground like snow.
MAX then turned his attention to Kivar. With Max still pinning his arms his face suddenly twisted in pain. MAX slowly walked towards him. "This is the last time you will ever hurt me and my family. You. Will. Pay." Max let go of Kivar who continued to twist in excruciating pain. His hands clutched at the sides of his head as if his brain was going to explode. He had never seen such power and it was too strong for him. "I could kill you. Right here, right now, Kivar. I could end this. But that would be too easy. I want you to SUFFER for all you've done. I want you to feel pain." MAX's hand tightened into a fist and Kivar screamed even louder. "BEG ME FOR MERCY!" MAX ordered.
With blood dripping down his nose and his eyes bloodshot he raised his head and spit through his teeth, "Never." MAX's hand tightened even further as Kivar screamed even louder. The walls shoke violently from its resonance. Then the screaming stopped and it was eerily silent. MAX then turned and saw Liz huddled on the floor. He ran to her and pulled her into an embrace.
"MAX." She whimpered through sobs.
"Shh, it's okay. You're safe. We have to get everyone out of here. They slowly got up to help the others out of there when they heard a moan.
A very battered and bruised Kivar raised a shaking hand at the couple. "Die, MAX. DIE!!!" Liz and MAX couldn't believe their eyes. Kivar still wasn't dead. He raised his hand in a last attempt to ruin MAX's life. Aiming at a support beam, he used his last ounce of strength and shot at it. The beam exploded and left the ceiling with no support. The roof came crashing down. MAX haunched over Liz to protect her from the falling debris. Clutching Liz with all his strength he felt the first piece debris strike his back. He screamed in pain but didn't move from his protective position. One after another, large chunks of debris fell on him. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, the debris stopped falling. A heavy cloud of dust surrounded them.
Liz coughed, trying to clear her throat from all the dust she had inhaled. The weight on her back was heavy and didn't move.
"MAX." She turned her head to see MAX's eyes closed while his arms were still around her. Pushing herself out of his grasp she sat up and held his still body.
"MAX??? Answer me!"
TBC
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alright, i've finally decided to fix this story. someone (a loooong time ago reviewed and told me that the ending was abrupt... and i have to agree. i didn't like how i ended this fic... but i was too busy (or lazy) to fix it. after finally coming back to university after my work term i decided i might try improving it... but as fun writing fanfic during calculus lectures is... i decided i should pay attention *grin*.. i'll try to post the next part soon.. but with midterms quickly approaching.. i don't know when that will be.
enuff ranting... please please please R&R... reviews make me giddy... :) *snicker*
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MAX heard a piercing scream and shut his eyes in horror. Suddenly the shrilling sound stopped. *Oh God. Liz...* Slowly he opened his eyes and prepared himself to see the lifeless body of his wife sprawled all over the floor in a pool of blood. What he saw was a woman dressed in black deliver a swift kick to Kivar in the back of his head. The energy beam missed Liz but it had created a big hole in the wall.
"WHO DARES TO STOP ME???" Kivar yelled with his eyes bulging and his face turning a deep crimson. He spun around to see Max smirking and in a fighting stance. Not only was Kivar shocked that a woman had dared to lay a hand (or foot) on him, it was a total stranger who didn't know who or what she was dealing with. His mouth gaped wide open.
"Who did you expect? The Easter bunny?" She laughed.
"You WITCH! I'll teach you to mess with Kivar!!!" He stretched out his hand and directed another energy beam at her. But Kivar also didn't know anything about the stranger. Max dodged the beam without even breaking a sweat.
"Is that all you got? Gotta do better than that, Kivar." This only aided in fuelling Kivar's anger. He threw a series of energy beams at her like a machine gun with each time Max stepping out of the way.
Throughout the whole fight, Liz had broken free from Kivar's hold, since he was busy concentrating on destroying the stranger who dared to intrude. Liz ran towards MAX, and this caught Kivar's attention. With anger sweltering inside him, he turned and aimed at Liz again intending to blow her tiny body into a thousand pieces. Max noticed Kivar's change in attention and charged towards him and before he could shoot the beam at Liz, she jerked his arm back and twisted it in a weird angle. The beam hit the ceiling right above Liz. It started to give way and big blocks of the ceiling came tumbling down. MAX screamed and suddenly he felt a burst of energy flow through him. He broke the chains that bound him and he aimed a beam straight at the block heading towards Liz. It shattered into dust and fell softly to the ground like snow.
MAX then turned his attention to Kivar. With Max still pinning his arms his face suddenly twisted in pain. MAX slowly walked towards him. "This is the last time you will ever hurt me and my family. You. Will. Pay." Max let go of Kivar who continued to twist in excruciating pain. His hands clutched at the sides of his head as if his brain was going to explode. He had never seen such power and it was too strong for him. "I could kill you. Right here, right now, Kivar. I could end this. But that would be too easy. I want you to SUFFER for all you've done. I want you to feel pain." MAX's hand tightened into a fist and Kivar screamed even louder. "BEG ME FOR MERCY!" MAX ordered.
With blood dripping down his nose and his eyes bloodshot he raised his head and spit through his teeth, "Never." MAX's hand tightened even further as Kivar screamed even louder. The walls shoke violently from its resonance. Then the screaming stopped and it was eerily silent. MAX then turned and saw Liz huddled on the floor. He ran to her and pulled her into an embrace.
"MAX." She whimpered through sobs.
"Shh, it's okay. You're safe. We have to get everyone out of here. They slowly got up to help the others out of there when they heard a moan.
A very battered and bruised Kivar raised a shaking hand at the couple. "Die, MAX. DIE!!!" Liz and MAX couldn't believe their eyes. Kivar still wasn't dead. He raised his hand in a last attempt to ruin MAX's life. Aiming at a support beam, he used his last ounce of strength and shot at it. The beam exploded and left the ceiling with no support. The roof came crashing down. MAX haunched over Liz to protect her from the falling debris. Clutching Liz with all his strength he felt the first piece debris strike his back. He screamed in pain but didn't move from his protective position. One after another, large chunks of debris fell on him. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, the debris stopped falling. A heavy cloud of dust surrounded them.
Liz coughed, trying to clear her throat from all the dust she had inhaled. The weight on her back was heavy and didn't move.
"MAX." She turned her head to see MAX's eyes closed while his arms were still around her. Pushing herself out of his grasp she sat up and held his still body.
"MAX??? Answer me!"
TBC
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
alright, i've finally decided to fix this story. someone (a loooong time ago reviewed and told me that the ending was abrupt... and i have to agree. i didn't like how i ended this fic... but i was too busy (or lazy) to fix it. after finally coming back to university after my work term i decided i might try improving it... but as fun writing fanfic during calculus lectures is... i decided i should pay attention *grin*.. i'll try to post the next part soon.. but with midterms quickly approaching.. i don't know when that will be.
enuff ranting... please please please R&R... reviews make me giddy... :) *snicker*
