A/N: There was no question that SaS HAD TO HAVE this epilogue. Enjoy!
Search and Seizure: Epilogue(Friday)
494 gave a long-suffering sigh and stretched, rubbing the back of his neck. 511 glanced at him unsympathetically. "Don't give me that." he told 494 firmly. "You are not going to talk me into writing this report for you."
494 gave him a reproachful look and turned to 529, opening his mouth. 529 held up a hand, writing with the other. "Don't even think it." he said. "I am annoyed enough having to write my own."
494 closed his mouth and looked down at the paper in front of him mournfully. 511 glanced up again. "How far have you gotten?" he asked.
"Operative: X5-494. Mission: 1109. Theatre: Uzbekistan. You?"
529 looked down at his own report. "Yeah, about that far."
"Hey, did you guys hear that the whole squadron that XFF-877 pilot belonged to is here for the next three days? Apparently Manticore's considering a program for training us on those."
511's eyes snapped to 529's face. "Where did you hear that?"
"From her co-pilot, in the admin building." 529 looked smug. 511 moved to get to his feet.
"Oh, no you don't." 494 gestured him back down. "We need to get this done before you go after your dessert." 511 sat, but shot him an irritated look.
494 sighed again, then picked up his pen and bent over the report.
[We received our orders and proceeded to processing, where we were {poked, prodded, colourized and dyed} disguised to appear local to the region. We proceeded to the quartermaster, where we obtained {stole} handguns and communications equipment.] 494 paused to flex his hand thoughtfully. [The flight to Bukhara was uneventful. Upon reaching the airport we arranged for {stole} transportation and proceeded to the target location.]
"You know, I spent a really remarkable amount of time unconscious on this mission." 529 commented idly, doodling in the margins. "I don't think I should have to report that I was unconscious."
"Quit complaining. At least you only have to write up the parts where you were alone or the only one conscious. I get the wonderful job of reporting on all the joint activities." 494 sounded sulky.
"That's why they pay you the big bucks." 529's lips twitched.
"Really? Here and I thought it was the drugs I keep selling them." 494's brows drew together, and he chewed on the edge of his thumb. 511 looked up.
"Hey, 494. Did I 'appropriate' the tank, or did I 'liberate' the tank?"
"Discovered. 'Discovered the tank.'" He considered a moment. "Alternative: 'stumbled across'."
511 nodded. "I suppose I shouldn't call her Edwina in my report, huh?" he asked wistfully.
494 looked at him levelly. "Probably not." he replied, "Probably shouldn't refer to blowing Eddie up as 'murdered the tank', either."
511 hastily scratched out his sentence. 494 rolled his eyes and returned to his own report.
[In my initial reconaissance, I identified {contrary to the mission profile} aproximately 20 soldiers onsite, heavily {as in NOT lightly}armed {also contrary to the mission profile} with ROMAK AKM rifles, SKS carbines, Viking pistols {sweet gun}, grenades, and GM-94 grenade launchers. I continued surveillance for one week to ensure adequate intelligence {though evidently not my own}, before going in.] He leaned back again.
"You know, everytime I think back, I realize what a fucking idiot I was to get caught by that thermal switch." he shook his head with annoyance. "I mean, come on. Though... I suppose the electrified vent couldn't have been anticipated."
"Just think, now you know what a mouse in a microwave feels like." 529 laughed. 511 stared at him until the chuckles faltered.
"A mouse in a microwave? Man, that's just sick." 511's lips twitched, betraying him.
"But funny." It was 494's turn to offer a grimace, and 529 held up his hands. "In theory. Just in theory." 494 and 511 bent back over the paperwork, and 529 shook his head. "Geeze. Tough room."
[In line with the mission parameters, {that I was never briefed on}, I allowed myself to be captured {like an idiot} by tripping a thermal sensor {that I didn't notice} in the {painfully... and effectively} electrified ventilation system.]
"Here." 529 tossed his report to 494 to review. "Take a look." 494 skimmed it, and closed his eyes in disbelief.
"It's spelled U-z-b-e-k-i-s-t-a-n." he said through gritted teeth.
"Really? What'd I use?"
"H-E-L-L."
511 snorted, then covered his mouth with his hand when 494 shot him a dark look. 494 continued grimly. "We did not 'steal' the guns, we 'obtained' the guns. We did not 'steal' the car, we 'arranged for' the car. We did not 'steal' the tank..."
"Damned straight 'we' didn't." 511 interrupted indignantly. "I stole Eddie."
494 cleared his throat, then continued. "We did not 'steal' the tank, 511 'stumbled across' the tank. You did not get 'knocked into La-La land', you were 'rendered unconscious'. And Ashkovich was not "coo coo for CoCo Puffs."
"Are you sure about that, cause I gotta say, that guy sure acted like he was." 529 told him earnestly.
"And finally, you did not hide out behind the table during the firefight."
"What's wrong with hiding out? When the bullets are flying it's a hell of a lot smarter than racing around dodging them."
"It's just... it's not..."
"What? Accurate?"
"Macho, man! It's just. Not. Macho."
"Oh." 529 took back his clipboard and ripped off the top page, then handed it back to 494. "You should probably use this one, then."
494's jaw dropped as he surveyed the perfectly completed mission report. 529 smirked. "See you guys later. I have a date with a redhead." He whistled softly to himself as he swaggered out.
"That bastard." 511 breathed. "The least he could have done was finish ours, too." He looked back down at his own report. "Hey, 494? I'm running out of other ways to say 'stole'."
494 stood and tossed his clipboard onto the bed. "We'll finish it later." he said. "Right now, I think it's time to extend the hand of friendship to our newly arrived Canadian guests."
511 thought a moment, then leaped up to join him.
"Think they'd let us extend anything else?"
Mission Debrief
Operative: X5-494
Mission: X5494-1109
Theatre: Uzbekistan
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We received our orders and proceeded to processing, where we were disguised to appear local to the region. We proceeded to the Quartermaster, where we obtained handguns and communications equipment. The flight to Bukhara was uneventful. Upon reaching the airport we arranged for transportation and proceeded to the target location.
In my initial reconaissance, I identified aproximately 20 soldiers onsite, armed with ROMAK AKM rifles, SKS carbines, Viking 446 pistols, fragmentation grenades, and GM-94 grenade launchers. I continued surveillance for one week to ensure accurate intelligence, before going in.
In line with mission parameters, I allowed myself to be captured by tripping a thermal sensor in the electrified ventilation system. I was placed in a hanging cage, from which I escaped using one of the epoxy picks provided by the Quartermaster. As I was preparing to aquire the sample and exit, 529 was brought in. His wound made it necessary for us to obtain medical assistance and delay our egress. I was returned to the cage and introduced to the target, Mikhail Ashkovich, who indicated that I was to be the test subject for the new virus. To ensure my cooperation, it was demonstrated that the cage was also electrified.
I was infected with the virus, and recovered within the projected timeframe. Ashkovich indicated that 529 was to be the next test subject, and I gave the order to resist, as the target would have not believed a passive response to infection. In the process of offering resistance, 529 was infected and shot once, and I was wounded in the leg. It was at this point that 511 arrived in a Russian Black Eagle tank and retrieved us from the compound, which was destroyed with a full casualty complement.
On orders from Colonel Lydecker, we proceeded to a Russian held airfield northwest of the compound, where we were picked up by a Canadian XFF-887 and returned to a base in Canada, where 529 and I received treatment and 511 worked to expand our relationship with the Canadian Military.
Additional Note: ELectricity was used very effectively in disabling both X5-529 and myself. Additional functional work in this area is recommended.
Mission Objectives Accomplished:
Obtain Argent sample
Obtain Argent vaccine
Destroy target compound
Mission Objectives Not Accomplished:
None