A/N: I don't own any of the harry potter characters and I'm not making ne
money of this fic and neither are you hahahaha!
Dedication: Severitus and Mediterranean Queen *I so love these girls lol! Thanks for all the reviews!*
Severus eyes shot open and he jumped up, gripping his right arm in pain. Luckily Lily was a heavy sleeper and he didn't wake her up. He decided to ignore it and fell back onto the pillow. Almost instantly another burning sensation shot through his arm and he hissed loudly in pain. Next to him, Lily stirred and opened her eyes.
"What's wrong?" she asked, her voice heavy with sleep.
"Nothing. Go back to sleep. I just have to go to the bathroom really quick." he told her, crawling out of bed and leaving the dorm room. He hastily made his way to the Forbidden Forest, hoping to get whatever it was over with quickly. He realized he didn't even put his cloak on and regretted it as the wind whipped around him, making him shiver.
He quickened his pace and made his way to the clearing he knew Voldemort would be.
"Hello Severus." Before he could drop to his knees, something cold and heavy was thrust into his hand. He looked to see the same ceremonial knife he held in his hands when he was initiated. He almost dropped it but Voldemort was quicker. He lifted his wand, pointed it at him and whispered. "Imperio."
~~**~~
Josie Gellar sat on the couch in her living room, idly flipping through the channels on her television with a bowel of popcorn in her lap. Her parents were in America on a business trip for the week and wouldn't be back for another three days. Her brother was out for the night so she had the house all to herself.
A knock at the door caught her attention and she looked at the clock- it was one in the morning. Her brother probably needed some money and forgot his keys as he often did. Sighing angrily, Josie got off the couch and headed for the door. She pulled it open but was taken aback when she saw her brother wasn't the one knocking.
Instead a thin boy about her age with black hair to his shoulders and cold black eyes stood on her doorstep. He wore a long black robe and he held a small silver knife in his hand.
When her gaze fell on the knife she gasped and turned to shut the door but the boy was quicker. He stuck his foot in the doorway and pushed it open with surprising strength. Josie screamed and tried to run but the boy grabbed her arm and pulled her into him, bringing the knife over his head. Josie tried to shrink away as she looked at the boy. For a moment he seemed to hesitate and some of the coldness left his eyes.
"Please don't do this." she begged. Then as quickly as it left the look came back colder and harder then ever and she saw him swing the knife down....
~~**~~
Suddenly Severus' head began to swim and he felt dizzy. He shut his eyes and when he opened him he saw his hands were smeared with dark red blood, as were his robes. He looked down to the ground and almost passed out. There was a girl lying motionless, facedown, in a puddle of blood at his feet. He had killed her, but he didn't remember doing it. Severus pushed the body with his foot rolled it over to reveal a girl with long sandy brown hair. Immediately he recognized her.
Lily's best friend.
He had just killed her. Slowly, the memories came flooding back to him. He had been summoned and he met Voldemort in the Dark Forest, he cast some sort of spell and then he remembered arriving at this house...
"Very nice Severus." Severus whipped his head around and saw the Dark Lord step out of a darkened corner.
"You did this." Severus said, feeling the anger build in him.
"Actually, you did. I just told you to do it. You could have broken the curse, but deep down you WANTED to do it. You like the power you feel when you take a life-"
"I do not!" Severus interrupted. Voldemort stared him down for a moment before crossing the room to stand in front of him.
"Very well. If you want to lie to yourself I can do nothing to stop you. The truth is you killed this girl. Now what are you going to tell the Mudblood?" Before Severus could answer everything went black.
~~**~~
Severus opened his eyes and felt a tremendous pain in his head. Looking around he realized he was in Lily's bed and sighed. He had just had a terrible dream. He brought his hand up to wipe the sleep from his eyes when he saw they were covered in dry blood. He shot up out of the bed and bolted to the door, through the Gryffindor Common Room and out the doors of the Entrance Hall.
Lily awoke to found the warmth she was so familiar with was missing. Tossing onto her side she saw that Severus wasn't there. She figured he went down to the Great Hall for an early breakfast but she was wrong. He wasn't in the Great Hall, or the Slytherin Common Room, or his dorm room, or the library. Confused, she looked around for a note but there was none.
"Um...okay, that's weird." she said to herself. She returned to her dorm and pulled out her History of Magic book to do some homework, figuring that Severus would come back in a while, so she might as well start on some of the work she had due after break.
However Severus didn't come back. He didn't go to lunch or dinner either. Now Lily was beginning to get worried. She threw on her cloak and walked out onto the Hogwarts grounds, the sun was almost set on the west, and there was a chill in the air. She wandered around the grounds until she came to the lake and saw a lone figure sitting on the ground, eyes fixed on something she couldn't see. It was Severus. She quickly made her way over to him and noted that we wasn't even wearing his cloak.
"Severus what are you doing?! Have you been out here all day?" she asked. Severus didn't even acknowledge her presence, he just continued to stare out at the lake.
"Hello? Do you hear me?" she asked again. Without even turning to her he whispered, his voice husky and low, "Go away Lily." Lily looked at him for a moment, stunned and confused.
"No I will not. What is wrong with you Sev?" she asked. Severus seemed to flinch at that but didn't meet her gaze.
"I'm warning you Lily, get back to the castle now." he hissed. Fear began to creep into Lily at his tone and voice. The fond kindness she'd seen in his eyes when she was with him was gone now, replaced with that bitter coldness he had before they had gotten together. She considered going back up to the castle and leaving him, but she shook that thought away.
"Severus I'm not going to leave until you tell me why you are acting like this." she said defiantly. Severus apparently had had enough. He jumped up and roughly grabbed Lily by the throat and applied pressure.
"Get...back.to...the...castle...now." he hissed, his voice dangerously low. He looked into her frightened eyes before giving her a hard push and turning his back to her. He heard her footsteps running back and heard her quiet sobs, but did nothing. There was nothing he could do.
~~**~~
For the rest of the break, Lily avoided Severus and he did the same. He went to eat at different times than she did, he stayed in the Slytherin dorms, and he didn't bother going to the library.
Lily had no idea what caused this sudden change in Severus' temperament and it scared her. He went from kind, compassionate and loving to cold, cruel, and dangerous in one day. She didn't even know where their relationship stood. She lied awake at night thinking or crying but still couldn't figure it out. After four lonely, agonizing days the rest of the student body returned to Hogwarts. Lily was in the Common Room when the Marauders came in, suitcases in hand, covered in snow.
"I didn't know it was snowing." she said. Remus smiled.
"It's not. We had a snowball fight." he said, giving her a warm smile. James gave her an angry look before announcing he was going to his room, leaving Lily with his three friends.
"He really hates me doesn't he?" she asked.
"Well you did leave him for Severus Snape." Sirius put in, receiving an elbow in the gut from Remus.
"Fine, no he doesn't hate you. He's just upset that you'd do that to him." Sirius grumbled before heading up the stairs with Peter to the dorms.
"Aren't you going to go too?" Lily asked Remus, closing the book she was reading and placing it on the table next to her. Remus sank into the chair in front of her and smiled.
"Actually, I wanted to talk with you for a while, if that's okay with you. I missed you." he said. Lily smiled.
"At least someone does." she muttered dejectedly.
"James misses you."
"I'm not talking about James."
"Then who are you talking about?" Remus asked confused. Lily sighed and looked at him.
"It's a long story, you don't want to know." she muttered
"Humor me." Lily launched into the story of Christmas break and the last time her and Severus had spoken. By the end she was in tears and couldn't continue. Remus sat and listened, biting his lip uncertainly. He rose from his chair and pulled her into a hug, letting her cry onto his shoulder.
"And I don't know why he won't talk to me." she sobbed. Remus stroked her back, trying to calm her down.
"I'm sure it's nothing you did. Maybe he just needs some time to think things through." Remus suggested.
"I hope so."
A/N: two chapters in one day man I kick booty!!! lol ne way I was thinking about changing the name of the fic but I'm not sure what I'm gonna change it to. ne ideas? Well thanks for readin and please review!!! Luv yas
Dedication: Severitus and Mediterranean Queen *I so love these girls lol! Thanks for all the reviews!*
Severus eyes shot open and he jumped up, gripping his right arm in pain. Luckily Lily was a heavy sleeper and he didn't wake her up. He decided to ignore it and fell back onto the pillow. Almost instantly another burning sensation shot through his arm and he hissed loudly in pain. Next to him, Lily stirred and opened her eyes.
"What's wrong?" she asked, her voice heavy with sleep.
"Nothing. Go back to sleep. I just have to go to the bathroom really quick." he told her, crawling out of bed and leaving the dorm room. He hastily made his way to the Forbidden Forest, hoping to get whatever it was over with quickly. He realized he didn't even put his cloak on and regretted it as the wind whipped around him, making him shiver.
He quickened his pace and made his way to the clearing he knew Voldemort would be.
"Hello Severus." Before he could drop to his knees, something cold and heavy was thrust into his hand. He looked to see the same ceremonial knife he held in his hands when he was initiated. He almost dropped it but Voldemort was quicker. He lifted his wand, pointed it at him and whispered. "Imperio."
~~**~~
Josie Gellar sat on the couch in her living room, idly flipping through the channels on her television with a bowel of popcorn in her lap. Her parents were in America on a business trip for the week and wouldn't be back for another three days. Her brother was out for the night so she had the house all to herself.
A knock at the door caught her attention and she looked at the clock- it was one in the morning. Her brother probably needed some money and forgot his keys as he often did. Sighing angrily, Josie got off the couch and headed for the door. She pulled it open but was taken aback when she saw her brother wasn't the one knocking.
Instead a thin boy about her age with black hair to his shoulders and cold black eyes stood on her doorstep. He wore a long black robe and he held a small silver knife in his hand.
When her gaze fell on the knife she gasped and turned to shut the door but the boy was quicker. He stuck his foot in the doorway and pushed it open with surprising strength. Josie screamed and tried to run but the boy grabbed her arm and pulled her into him, bringing the knife over his head. Josie tried to shrink away as she looked at the boy. For a moment he seemed to hesitate and some of the coldness left his eyes.
"Please don't do this." she begged. Then as quickly as it left the look came back colder and harder then ever and she saw him swing the knife down....
~~**~~
Suddenly Severus' head began to swim and he felt dizzy. He shut his eyes and when he opened him he saw his hands were smeared with dark red blood, as were his robes. He looked down to the ground and almost passed out. There was a girl lying motionless, facedown, in a puddle of blood at his feet. He had killed her, but he didn't remember doing it. Severus pushed the body with his foot rolled it over to reveal a girl with long sandy brown hair. Immediately he recognized her.
Lily's best friend.
He had just killed her. Slowly, the memories came flooding back to him. He had been summoned and he met Voldemort in the Dark Forest, he cast some sort of spell and then he remembered arriving at this house...
"Very nice Severus." Severus whipped his head around and saw the Dark Lord step out of a darkened corner.
"You did this." Severus said, feeling the anger build in him.
"Actually, you did. I just told you to do it. You could have broken the curse, but deep down you WANTED to do it. You like the power you feel when you take a life-"
"I do not!" Severus interrupted. Voldemort stared him down for a moment before crossing the room to stand in front of him.
"Very well. If you want to lie to yourself I can do nothing to stop you. The truth is you killed this girl. Now what are you going to tell the Mudblood?" Before Severus could answer everything went black.
~~**~~
Severus opened his eyes and felt a tremendous pain in his head. Looking around he realized he was in Lily's bed and sighed. He had just had a terrible dream. He brought his hand up to wipe the sleep from his eyes when he saw they were covered in dry blood. He shot up out of the bed and bolted to the door, through the Gryffindor Common Room and out the doors of the Entrance Hall.
Lily awoke to found the warmth she was so familiar with was missing. Tossing onto her side she saw that Severus wasn't there. She figured he went down to the Great Hall for an early breakfast but she was wrong. He wasn't in the Great Hall, or the Slytherin Common Room, or his dorm room, or the library. Confused, she looked around for a note but there was none.
"Um...okay, that's weird." she said to herself. She returned to her dorm and pulled out her History of Magic book to do some homework, figuring that Severus would come back in a while, so she might as well start on some of the work she had due after break.
However Severus didn't come back. He didn't go to lunch or dinner either. Now Lily was beginning to get worried. She threw on her cloak and walked out onto the Hogwarts grounds, the sun was almost set on the west, and there was a chill in the air. She wandered around the grounds until she came to the lake and saw a lone figure sitting on the ground, eyes fixed on something she couldn't see. It was Severus. She quickly made her way over to him and noted that we wasn't even wearing his cloak.
"Severus what are you doing?! Have you been out here all day?" she asked. Severus didn't even acknowledge her presence, he just continued to stare out at the lake.
"Hello? Do you hear me?" she asked again. Without even turning to her he whispered, his voice husky and low, "Go away Lily." Lily looked at him for a moment, stunned and confused.
"No I will not. What is wrong with you Sev?" she asked. Severus seemed to flinch at that but didn't meet her gaze.
"I'm warning you Lily, get back to the castle now." he hissed. Fear began to creep into Lily at his tone and voice. The fond kindness she'd seen in his eyes when she was with him was gone now, replaced with that bitter coldness he had before they had gotten together. She considered going back up to the castle and leaving him, but she shook that thought away.
"Severus I'm not going to leave until you tell me why you are acting like this." she said defiantly. Severus apparently had had enough. He jumped up and roughly grabbed Lily by the throat and applied pressure.
"Get...back.to...the...castle...now." he hissed, his voice dangerously low. He looked into her frightened eyes before giving her a hard push and turning his back to her. He heard her footsteps running back and heard her quiet sobs, but did nothing. There was nothing he could do.
~~**~~
For the rest of the break, Lily avoided Severus and he did the same. He went to eat at different times than she did, he stayed in the Slytherin dorms, and he didn't bother going to the library.
Lily had no idea what caused this sudden change in Severus' temperament and it scared her. He went from kind, compassionate and loving to cold, cruel, and dangerous in one day. She didn't even know where their relationship stood. She lied awake at night thinking or crying but still couldn't figure it out. After four lonely, agonizing days the rest of the student body returned to Hogwarts. Lily was in the Common Room when the Marauders came in, suitcases in hand, covered in snow.
"I didn't know it was snowing." she said. Remus smiled.
"It's not. We had a snowball fight." he said, giving her a warm smile. James gave her an angry look before announcing he was going to his room, leaving Lily with his three friends.
"He really hates me doesn't he?" she asked.
"Well you did leave him for Severus Snape." Sirius put in, receiving an elbow in the gut from Remus.
"Fine, no he doesn't hate you. He's just upset that you'd do that to him." Sirius grumbled before heading up the stairs with Peter to the dorms.
"Aren't you going to go too?" Lily asked Remus, closing the book she was reading and placing it on the table next to her. Remus sank into the chair in front of her and smiled.
"Actually, I wanted to talk with you for a while, if that's okay with you. I missed you." he said. Lily smiled.
"At least someone does." she muttered dejectedly.
"James misses you."
"I'm not talking about James."
"Then who are you talking about?" Remus asked confused. Lily sighed and looked at him.
"It's a long story, you don't want to know." she muttered
"Humor me." Lily launched into the story of Christmas break and the last time her and Severus had spoken. By the end she was in tears and couldn't continue. Remus sat and listened, biting his lip uncertainly. He rose from his chair and pulled her into a hug, letting her cry onto his shoulder.
"And I don't know why he won't talk to me." she sobbed. Remus stroked her back, trying to calm her down.
"I'm sure it's nothing you did. Maybe he just needs some time to think things through." Remus suggested.
"I hope so."
A/N: two chapters in one day man I kick booty!!! lol ne way I was thinking about changing the name of the fic but I'm not sure what I'm gonna change it to. ne ideas? Well thanks for readin and please review!!! Luv yas