A CCS Fanfic By Card Captor Schlueter (a.k.a. Syaoran-kun)
Memo From The Legal Dept.
We don't own this stuff and we don't care because we have disclaimers. Try to sue us and we'll shred you into coleslaw, got it?
Chapter Twelve: Take Two Aspirin And Call Me In The MorningThere's something I'd like to talk about before I continue. Have you ever heard of the term 'idle rich'? It's generally used to describe someone who has a lot of money by birth and never has to work a day in their life. I mention this because I'm rich and my life is clearly not easy. Between the cards, my magic practice, school, avoiding Touya and so on my days are generally fairly full.
Just this morning I had to deal with the latest in a stream of complaints from Meiling. It turns out her subscription service had misspelled her name. The had spelled it "Meilin" instead of "Meiling". Naturally, Meiling made a big deal out of this. It's one of her trademarks just like that hairstyle she ripped off from "Sailor Moon".
"Why can't they just add the 'g' at the end of my name?" she had said. Then she grumbled something about a stupid American in the shipping department.
This morning I got up earlier than usual. That turned out to be a good thing because I managed to make it to class before it started raining. It turned out to be only a brief downpour and most of the students avoided getting wet.
Unfortunately, Sakura wasn't one of them. She came into class looking as though she swam to school.
"Sakura, are you alright?" asked Tomoyo, immediately concerned. So was I. Catching pneumonia can be detrimental to you health.
"I'm okay, Tomoyo-ch-ah-Ah-AH-Choo!" I handed Sakura my handerchief. "No. You're not, Sakura. It's obvious you've caught a cold from being out in the rain and staying here all day in those wet clothes isn't going to help." I explained. "Maybe you should go home."
"Really, Li-kun, I'm… AH-CHOO!"
"No, you're not." I replied.
Terada, who was hoping to get the class started sometime today, became curious as to what was going on. "What's going on?" were his exact words.
"Sakura got caught in the rain. It seems to have given her a head cold." I explained.
"AH-CHOO!"
"See?"
"Kinomoto-san, I'm afraid Li-san is right," said Terada. "You should probably go home and get some rest. Li-san, would you do me a favor and take Sakura home?"
"Um… yes, sir." I replied.
"AH-Ah-CHOOOO!"
**
The walk to Sakura's home was fairly uneventful, except for the sneezing. When we got there we were greeted by Kero-Chan.
"What's going on?" he asked.
"Slight weather related mishap." I explained.
"Ah-CHOO!"
"You'd better go change out of those wet clothes, Sakura." I said. "I'll make us some tea."
"Thank you, Li…. AH-CHOO!"
"Um… I didn't need that."
"Oh, I'm so sorry, Li-kun."
"That's okay," I sighed. "This shirt needs washing anyway."
**
While I was making tea, I couldn't help but hear a strange, muffled sound coming from my school bag. I'll give you three guesses as to what it was and the first two don't count.
When I opened it to see what was going on I found Kero-Ni inside. I'd like to say I was surprised, but, I wasn't. "What are you doing here?" I asked.
"I want to be around for the rest of the card captures, of course." Kero-Ni replied. "Just think, soon I'll prove to that pathetic imposter who the real guardian beast is."
I let out a sigh.
"Hey, where are we anyway?" asked Kero-Ni.
"I think you'll find out soon enough." I replied.
"Say, what's that weird stain on your sleeve?" Kero-Ni asked.
**
"Ah-CHOO! Thank you, sniffLi-kun," said Sakura as she took a sip of her tea. She had managed to change back into her pajamas and crawl into bed. She was not looking that well. I felt her forehead to see if she had a temperature, which is what my sisters always did to me when I had a cold. Meanwhile, Kero and Kero-Ni were glowering at each other again.
"It's too bad there isn't a Clow card that can cure the common cold, ne?" said Sakura.
"Well," I began. "There are some incantations that can cure illness and injury. My mother used to practice white magic quite a bit. I think two of my sisters still practice the art."
"I don't suppose you sniff know any of those incantations." Sakura inquired.
"I'm afraid not," I replied. "But it's not for a lack of trying. I just don't have the right energy balance for white magic, I guess."
"How are things with your family, Li-kun?"
"Not bad." I said. "Although, we did have a few minor problems to deal with when the British handed over Hong Kong to China. But…" I stopped when I noticed that Sakura was looking fairly stunned and confused. She looked like someone who had just been asked to translate an abstract theory of the universe from Swahili. "I guess that politics isn't your strong suit, hm?"
"Li-kun, why would you even bother…"
"To follow that kind of thing? It's my business to know, Sakura. Whether I like it or not, I have a lot of responsibility to deal with." I paused. "Anyway, I'm going to stay here with you for now. I'm hoping Daidouji will be able to come by after classes. I don't want to leave you alone but I don't want to be around when your brother gets back either."
It was at that moment that Sakura took hold of my hand, which made me slightly nervous and, of course, blushing followed. "I wish you and Touya could just learn to get along," said Sakura, sounding sleepy. "I mean, he's not always such a jerk."
"I'm sure you tell him the same thing about me." I said. "You just try and get some rest and…" It was then that I realized Sakura had already fallen asleep. "Uh… Never mind."
"You know, Touya's going to be upset about this," said Kero-Chan.
"What else is new?" I replied sarcastically.
"No, I mean doing Sakura's chores around the house."
"Well, I'm still here. I'll do them." I said.
"YOU?!"
"Yes. Is that so hard to believe?" I sighed. "But what can I expect of a stuffed animal, anyway?"
"Well, seeing as you're so brilliant, maybe I should just retire to New York and become a cabbie," grumbled Kero-Chan.
Somehow, I couldn't picture Kero-Chan with a New York accent. He handed me the list of Sakura's chores. "All right, plushie, you stay here in case Sakura needs anything. If she does, just let me know about it. Kero-Ni, I might need your help getting this stuff done before Daidouji gets here, so you're with me."
"Of course, sir!" replied Kero-Ni. "I'm always happy to serve the real Card Captor."
Kero-Chan glowered and I just sighed. I gave Sakura a small kiss on the forehead, which I thought was a romantic gesture, before leaving. Well, I would have left if Sakura wasn't still holding my hand which I couldn't get back. Sakura rolled over slightly in her sleep pulling my hand along with her, which in turn threw me off balance and caused me to fall backwards and crash to the floor.
"Um… Could someone give me a hand here?" I said. "Preferably mine."
"This isn't exactly his finest moment, is it?" said Kero-Chan.
**
Before I went to work I called Tomoyo to ask her to take over for me after classes so that I could be gone before Touya arrived. She agreed but said I was paranoid. I replied that I had every reason to be paranoid. I would either be beaten up by Touya or, if I managed to take out the tall lanky doofus, I'd have to deal with Nakuru, which wouldn't be fun either.
After I hung up the phone I noticed Kero-Chan had come downstairs. "Sakura is awake and she wants pudding," he said.
"Nice try, plushie." I replied. I looked over the list. I noticed that one of the items was watering the house plants. "Well, I already have a solution for this one." I went and retrieve my sword and Clow cards from my school bag.
"Oh no!" whined Kero-Ni. "Not 'The Rain' card again!"
"Why not?" I asked.
"It's always picking on me!"
"A real Guardian beast wouldn't be afraid of the Clow cards." Kero-Chan gloated.
"Rain card! Release!" The card dissolved into energy which quickly took the for of the cute little spirit we know as 'The Rain'. "Ohayo!" It said in its cute little voice. It looked over at Kero-Chan, then Kero-Ni. It looked back and forth between the two of them a couple of times before letting out a small shriek and hiding behind my head.
"What's her problem?" asked Kero-Chan.
'The Rain' whispered something in my ear. "It thinks Kero-Ni went out for reinforcements." I said. "Don't you worry about the big bad stuffed toys," I told it. "You just do your job, okay?"
'The Rain' looked nervously at Kero and Kero-Ni one last time before heading out on its rounds.
**
I don't like the idea of doing someone else's laundry. I think most people agree. They would also agree that they don't want someone else looking through their laundry. This was what I was thinking while I worked on doing the Kinomoto laundry.
"What on Earth are these?" asked Kero-Ni holding up an item.
"I think those belong to Touya," I replied, trying not to laugh.
**
"This floor will take forever to scrub," grumbled Kero-Ni.
"Not if I can help it." I replied holding up 'The Bubbles' card.
**
"This work is sooooo boring." Kero-Ni whined.
"Why don't you turn on the stereo?" I suggested. When he did what came out was Touya and Yukito singing "Who Let The Dogs Out?"
"ACK!" was my immediate reaction. "Shut that off! Quick!"
**
I was busy doing the dishes when Tomoyo arrived. "Well, well. I didn't know Sakura's family had the money to hire a maid."
"Oh, shut up." I replied. I stepped away from the sink and packed up my sword and the Clow cards, just in case Touya or Sakura's father came home early. I aked Kero-Ni to go back into hiding as well.
"What happened to your shirt?" asked Tomoyo "You've got a weird mark on your sleeve. What happened? Did she sneeze on you?"
"Yes." I replied flatly.
"Oh." Clearly, she hadn't been expecting that answer.
"By the way, I can't help but notice that there are a lot of pictures of the same woman around this house." I picked on of the framed photos off of a shelf. "See?"
"That's Nadesico Kinomoto." Tomoyo explained. "You know, Sakura's mother."
"Oh." I replied. This was the first time I had ever actually seen a picture of Nadesico. Sakura talked about her from time to time but I had never gotten a clear picture of what she might have looked like. I set the picture back in its place. "Anyway," I continued. "I think she's still sleeping right now. Once I'm done with the dishes, I'll be leaving."
Tomoyo headed upstairs to see Sakura and I returned to the unglamorous job of washing dishes. A few minutes later, I head the front door open again.
Uh-oh! Touya's home!
"I'm home!" Wait. That wasn't Touya's voice. That meant it must be… Yes, it was Fujitaka Kinomoto, who walked past the kitchen and noticed that there was someone who was not a member of his immediate family washing the dishes.
"Um… Hello, sir…" I said.
"And you are?" he asked.
"Um… My name is Syaoran Li, sir." I replied. This situation made me very nervous because I didn't know what, if anything, Fujitaka Kinomoto thought of me.
"Oh, yes. That's right. Now I recognize you," he said. "Might I ask why you're doing my daughter's chores?"
"She got caught in the rain this morning and came down with a cold." I explained. "I brought her home."
"Is she all right?" he asked, suddenly concerned.
"Yes," I replied. "Daidouji-san is upstairs with her now."
"Um… Might I ask what happened to your shirt?"
"Uh… Your daughter sneezed on me, sir."
"Oh." This was not a conversation for the ages.
Just then, I heard the front door open again. This time it was Touya. "I'm home!" When he walked past the kitchen he immediately noticed me. Glowering ensued. "What are you doing here, brat?" he asked.
"Your sister came down with a cold and…" Before Fujitaka could finish, Touya decided to interrogate me himself via the method of picking me up by the front of my shirt.
"What did you do to my sister, you little jerk?!" he asked with all the subtlety of a kick in the head.
"He didn't do anything to her, Touya." Fujitaka tried to explain. "Now put the boy down."
"You're awfully judgmental for a guy who wears underwear with little ducks on them." I said with as much sarcasm as I could muster.
This served only to make Touya madder. "Why you…"
"Tell me, did you ever figure out who let the dogs out?" I said. I knew I was digging my own grave here, but I figured if Touya was going to pound me I may as well get something out of it.
"Hello? Is anyone home?" called Yukito from the front door. Looks like I'm in the middle of rush hour. I used this momentary distraction to slip free of Touya's grip grab my school bag and sprint out the front door.
"HEY!" shouted Touya. "Get back here!!"
"Calm down, Touya," said Yukito. "You look like you're about to rupture a blood vessel."
Fortunately, Fujitaka and Yukito managed to hold off Touya long enough for me to get away.
**
The next morning, everything was back to normal…
Sort of.
"How are you this morning, Li-kun?" Sakura asked.
"AH-Choo!" I replied with a handkerchief in front of my face.
Why me?
Next: Syaoran goes up against 'The Power' card but can he do when the card drags him to the bottom of a very deep aquarium tank? Will he succeed or will our hero sleep with the fishes? What's your best guess?
All this and other wordy stuff in Chapter 13: Houdini, Eat Your Heart Out.