Chapter 14: Quotes of a Broken Man
I sat in the lobby of the hotel we were staying in sipping my third scotch. I left the station and lab as fast as I could. I had to get out of there. On the way out I muttered somewhat of an apology to Epps. I was too harsh on him for no reason other than the fact he had bad timing. He said he was sorry for not considering Sara's feelings and interrupting us. Us. What did he mean by that? There was no us, no anymore and there never will be. She still pushed me out. I pushed her out. I lost her friendship a long time ago when I doubted her relationship with Hank and got jealous. Now only a drunken Gil Grissom would make such deep admissions of the heart. Why? Hell I don't know. When I am sober, which is almost the whole time, I tended to be more...what's the word I am looking for? Oh well. Don't know, don't care.
I wanted this to be over. I wanted to go home to my own house, to my bugs, to my butterfly collection, to my forensic magazines, to my crossword puzzles, to normal life. I wanted Sara too. I wanted things back the way things were. I wanted my hearing back. I want job security again. Right now my job was almost nonexistent. I received another fax from Ecklie claiming that because I didn't return to Vegas, that we were all officially suspended and should reconsider before drastic measures were taken.
"Hey Gil."
I turned to find Catherine standing behind me. "Hello Catherine."
"We got the prints off the gun. They match Elizabeth Clark's. She was lying; she was there and she did have Sara's gun at some point."
If I wasn't drunk I might have cared more. "Good news. Now all we need is the truth. But sometimes that is the hardest part."
"Whatever happened to 'concentrate on what cannot lie, the evidence cannot lie'. I thought if you follow the evidence then you find truth."
" 'The deepest sin against the human mind is to believe things without evidence. Science is simply common sense at its best--that is rigidly accurate in observation, and merciless to the fallacy in logic.' Thomas Huxley."
"Life throws us obstacles all the time Gil, that never bothered you before."
" 'Obstacles are those frightful things that we see when we take our eyes off our goal.' Henry Ford."
"You are the only person I know that can be wasted and still come up with that crap."
"First of all I am not 'wasted' and secondly I didn't come up with them."
"I suppose you have one for every occasion."
" 'It is the path of least resistance that make rivers and men crooked.' Bj Palmer."
"You wouldn't be talking about Ethan Parks are you?"
"If the shoe fits..."
"Well they are bringing in Clark. You should be there but not like this. I think maybe we should hold off until tomorrow after you sleep."
" 'No one wants advice, only collaboration.' John Steinbeck. And I believe your collaboration is useful." I stood on wobbly legs and Catherine put her arm around my waist. She led me to my room and let me fall onto the bed. I was almost about to fall asleep when Catherine's words drifted to my ears.
"Gil what happened when Warrick and I stepped out?"
" 'Learning how to stand up is easy. Learning to stand up after you've fallen down, that is tough.' Dican."
"And that means?"
I saw that I was confusing her. "I have fallen down Catherine and it is tough to stand back up."
"Was it something you said? To Sara?"
" 'When something is true words are not necessary.' Author unknown." I rolled onto my stomach and let the pillow surround my head.
"Damnit Grissom. Stop doing that. I am not in the mood for your riddles. It is driving my insane."
" 'I don't suffer from insanity but enjoy every minute of it.' Edgar Allen Poe. Maybe you could take Poe's advice Catherine."
"I am a trained investigator Gil, I can get rid of a body without evidence." She teased.
" 'There is always a clue.' Gil Grissom." I mumbled into the pillow.
"Gil, Sara isn't upset with you." She said reading my thoughts.
"She should be."
"Well I think she just needs time to get her feelings together. How was she feeling when you left? Still sick?"
"Yeah." I paused considering my next thoughts and if they were too unprofessional. But I didn't care right now how it sounded. "I am worried about her. She won't tell me how she really feels."
"That's her wall. And don't you dare ask me to break it down because I am still chiseling away your wall Gil Grissom." I am almost sure she shook her head. "Get some rest Gil. I'll see you at breakfast."
"Goodnight Catherine." I mumbled before I pass out from exhaustion and the scotch.
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tbc...