Setsuna Hears the Voices
Time passed in its usual manner. Setsuna's
eighth birthday, spent on Pluto with Lord Hades and Chronos just as her
seventh, came and went. Again her lessons resumed from where they had been
halted. Setsuna kept trying to hear the Voices of the Dead, even though
the optimism with which she had faced the task months before was waning.
When she first began listening for the Voices, she had expected several
failures early on, followed by a great success. Now, her record was still
a string of failures, and Setsuna was beginning to feel discouraged. Her
lack of success was especially disheartening now that she was a whole eight
years of age. Being so grown up, was it right that she was still struggling
to master her powers?
"Does it always take this long to hear the
Voices of the Dead?" Setsuna asked one afternoon as she sat with her mother,
listening for the Voices. The sudden break in the silence startled Lady
Moira from a peaceful reverie. The former warrior raised her garnet gaze
from her lap to her daughter, sitting cross-legged in the chair beside
her. Setsuna, her elbows propped up on her knees, cupped her chin in her
hands. She had her eyes closed, and a deep frown of concentration creased
her blessed little brow. The pose was the very same Moira had found her
in several moments earlier. In asking her question, she had moved nothing
but her lips.
"I told you it would, darling. You cannot
expect your powers to awaken overnight."
"But it has not been overnight!" Setsuna protested,
still not moving. "It has been months and months!"
"Setsuna, please open your eyes." Lady Moira
sighed, somewhat put off by her child's lack of movement. "You will not
be able to hear the Voices while talking to me, so there is no need to
be so still. What troubles you, love?" Slowly, Setsuna opened one cranberry
eye, then the other, and stretched briefly before turning to face her mother.
"Mother, I am now eight years of age. I have
been training with you for two years now, and I cannot yet even hear the
Voices of the Dead. Should that be?"
"You must be patient, my daughter," said the
Queen mildly.
"But I have been patient, Mother! I have been
patient for months now, but all in vain! I have done all that you have
taught me! It should not take so long for your seeds to bear fruit unless
I, the soil, am flawed in some way!" Moira raised an eyebrow.
"I did not begin to hear the Voices of the
Dead until I was ten, myself," she said. Blood rushed up to Setsuna's cheeks,
staining them a flattering shade of pink. She instantly wished she had
held her tongue, but seeing her embarrassment, Lady Moira laughed.
"When I could not hear the Voices, I too felt
as though it were a fault of mine. I believed my inability to hear them—at
ten years of age, no less—made me an embarrassment to my mother?"
"Did it?" Setsuna asked, for she felt just
as her own mother had described.
"Not at all," was Lady Moira's reply, "She
said to me, 'Moira, you are my daughter, and nothing in this world can
change that.' Do you understand what she meant?"
"She meant that you were born to her, so you
were her own no matter what." Setsuna said promptly, not one to let her
mother explain if she knew the answer already.
"Exactly," said the Queen. "I was her eldest
daughter, and that was the way of it. She could not trade me for another,
or return me to her womb to forget I ever was born. I knew her meaning
as well as she. And do you know what she told me after that?" Setsuna shook
her head. That was a question to which she did not know the answer.
"She said, 'for the fact that I cannot trade
you. I praise the gods every day of my life.'" For a moment, mother and
daughter both were silent. There was no need for Lady Moira to ask if Setsuna
understood; she did. She understood perfectly, and that was what left her
at a loss for words. She could think of no response. It was all she could
do to meet her mother's eyes. They gazed steadily at one another for several
minutes, until Lady Moira's sigh ruptured the silence. The Queen of Pluto
stood then, but only to join Setsuna in her own seat. The chair was a large
one, and Lady Moira, being of rather delicate build, easily fit in beside
the princess. Tenderly, she brushed a stray hair from her child's eye,
a curiously melancholy smile on her lips.
"I love you, Setsuna. I will always love you.
I know the training cannot be easy for you, but you mustn't let failure
dishearten you. Whatever happens, my girl, you can trust that I will still
love you. When you begin to hear the Voices, I will be a proud and happy
mother, just as I am now. And while the Voices still evade you, I will
love you no less." Setsuna found her own voice again.
"But what of this kingdom, Mother? It is my
duty to protect this kingdom as a Sailor Soldier. How can I do my duty
until I become a Sailor Soldier?" Moira chuckled without joy.
"I am still young, child. My body and my powers
are still strong enough that I can do battle if need be. You needn't fear."
Moira pulled Setsuna into a tight embrace. "Do not be in such a rush to
become Sailor Pluto, Setsuna. You are far too young to lose your innocence."
Setsuna's sleep was troubled that night. Her
mother's words ran through her head in an endless circle, keeping her awake
for hours. You are far too young to lose your innocence. Though she did
not understand it, the statement bothered her. Something in the way her
mother had spoken those words—longingly, her voice aching with loss—made
Setsuna feel eerily cold and strange. The girl shivered beneath her blankets,
trying for the first time in her life, to shut out the echo of her mother's
voice.
Eventually, a fitful sleep found her, and
as she slept, she dreamed—the strangest, most vivid dream she had ever
seen. In her dream, she was lying in her bed, and it was just before daybreak.
The blackness that cloaked her chambers in the night had been turned gray
by the feeble, pre-dawn light. Setsuna glanced about the room. In the bed
to her left, she could just make out Michiru sleeping peacefully, her breathing
deep and even. In the bed on the far left, Haruka stirred slightly. A sleepy
murmur escaped her lips, and then she was silent once more.
The details of Setsuna's bedchamber were sharp
and real. Looking down at herself, she found that she was even wearing
the same elegant white night dress she had put on before retiring that
evening. This surprised her, as she was somehow aware of the fact that
she was dreaming, but that was not what concerned her most. Dreams were
unpredictable, and Setsuna's pulse fluttered with nervousness as she wondered
what surprises her subconscious mind had in store for her. Drawing in a
deep, calming breath, Setsuna huddled beneath her blankets, bracing herself
for whatever was to come.
Soft voices stirred the air in the room. Setsuna
bolted upright. At the foot of her bed stood two figures, veiled in the
dusky shadows of the day's first light. Darkness made their faces swirl,
and washed all color from them and their surroundings. In spite of this,
Setsuna managed to identify the taller of the two shadows as her grandfather
by the sheer familiarity of his form and manner. The other one was familiar
to her as well—eerily so. A strange, though not unpleasant sensation settled
over the princess as she gazed upon the shorter figure. Setsuna squinted,
trying to make her—she was sure it was a woman—out.
Her hair was long, that much she could tell
right away. She was also fairly tall, only shorter than Chronos by inches.
She appeared to be slender, although with her hair being so long, it was
difficult to tell in the darkness. When she shifted, catching what little
light there was, Setsuna was able to catch a brief flash of silver at the
woman's waist. What is was, though, she could not tell. In her hand, the
feminine shadow clutched some sort of staff, at the top of which something
gleamed red.
Noticing that Setsuna was watching them, the
figures ceased their whispering and turned to face her.
"Grandfather?" Setsuna asked of the Chronos-shaped
shadow, just to confirm it was he.
"It is I, my dear one," he replied softly.
Beside him, the woman shifted as if something had startled her.
"Who is that?" Setsuna asked, pointing.
"I am you," said the womanly shadow, "I am
who you will become." Setsuna gasped softly, mindful of her friends even
as she dreamed.
"Are you Sailor Pluto?" she asked in a whisper.
The woman shushed her gently.
"Sleep now," said she. Setsuna frowned, though
she knew the shadow would not be able to see it.
"I am asleep!" Setsuna protested as
quietly as she could. "And I would like to know if you are Sailor Pluto!"
Her grandfather chuckled. The next Setsuna knew, he was at her side, gently
guiding her head back to her pillow.
"Listen to yourself, sweet granddaughter,"
Chronos said, for she is the image of your future, and that is all you
need know. It is nearly time for you to wake, and to wake, you must sleep
in the world of your dreams."
So that woman is Sailor Pluto. Setsuna
thought with certainty. Because she always obeyed her dear grandfather,
Setsuna burrowed beneath her blankets, and closed her eyes. Chronos rejoined
Sailor Pluto, and the two exchanged whispered words. In spite of herself,
Setsuna yawned, feeling the odd dream-sleep begin to overtake her. Then,
the voice of her future self came to her like an afterthought.
"Do not forget Mother's words, Setsuna," the
woman said. "She speaks only the truth." The dream faded then, and Setsuna
awoke with sunlight hurting her eyes.
Although she knew it had all been a dream,
Setsuna was compelled to heed Sailor Pluto's advice. She did not shut out
her mother's words, and did not get discouraged when her efforts to hear
the Voices resulted only in silence—or at least, she tried not to.
"Try it again, Setsuna." Lady Moira urged
her weary daughter one evening. "Just once more." Setsuna, wincing as she
rubbed the back of her stiff neck, looked up at the Queen of Pluto pleadingly.
"Mother, I am tired." She protested, her statement
reflected in her face as well as her voice. A yawn she could not quite
hide parted her lips slightly, and she blinked groggily at her mother to
keep her eyes from closing. Moira smiled sympathetically.
"I know you are, dearest. That is why I want
for you to try it again." She frowned thoughtfully. "I think perhaps, if
you listen when you are tired, there will be less that can distract you."
Setsuna could hardly argue with a theory like that. She knew that when
she was alert, every sound was magnified one hundred times over. It made
listening for the Voices quite difficult. Still, she was so tired!
On the other hand, her mother had asked her
to try again. Setsuna loved her mother, and would do anything to please
her. Although her legs and back ached from sitting still, and her head
swam with exhaustion, Setsuna decided she would try again. She nodded her
consent. Moira smiled.
"Relax this time," the Plutonian Queen suggested.
"You may sit more comfortably if you wish." Setsuna was grateful for that.
She stretched briefly, easing the kinks from her spine, then curled up
in her chair, resting her head on the arm. Setsuna let her eyelids fall
closed.
Almost immediately, she felt the pull of sleep
on her mind, and forced it back to the shadows. Concentrate. She told herself.
Concentrate. But she felt so tired…
The air was still around her. Setsuna felt
her mother's eyes upon her. Moira was watching. Watching her daughter for
any sign of movement. She would not move; Setsuna knew better than that.
Besides, she no longer felt she had the strength to move. A sudden chill
swept through her, but she did not shiver. She could not have shivered
had she wanted to.
Setsuna felt somehow detached from herself.
Any sound that came to her was distorted as if someone had pulled it from
the air, and twisted it out of shape. They seemed to come from further
and further away, until they stopped coming all together.
Setsuna found herself standing before a swirling
black hole. She could hear nothing now. She could see nothing now, save
that strangely intriguing black hole. She was not afraid. Her blood was
liquid ice within her veins, but she did not feel cold. The ice was a part
of her. So was that black hole. Feeling impossibly peaceful, Setsuna stepped
into the darkness.
The chill left her. Setsuna was warm within
the dark and silent void. She still was not afraid, although she hadn't
the slightest idea where she was. She might have tried to explore the blackness,
but something told her she should remain motionless. Setsuna patiently
waited for what was to come.
What's this? Asked an old woman's voice
that seemed to come from inside her head. A visitor? Oh, it's you, dearie!
How nice! Is your mother with you? Oh, I see. Moira, you silly little goose!
The woman laughed fondly, but Setsuna was far too shocked to say anything.
Briefly, she wondered if speech would even be possible under these circumstances.
Is there someone listening, Highness? Asked
another female voice, one that sounded much younger than the first.
Our granddaughter, Lora. The first
woman replied, and Setsuna realized with a start that she was hearing the
voice of her mother's mother, the former Queen of Pluto! And do not
call me "Highness." I am not a Queen here.
Old habits die hard, Helena. The second
woman chuckled. Hello, Princess. How are you? Setsuna started to
say she was fine, but found she could not speak, in spite of the fact that
she had recovered from her initial shock.
It is only her first time hearing us. She
cannot speak here yet.
My apologies, Princess Pluto. Lora
replied softly.
Tsk, tsk! So formal! Helena scolded
with a laugh. This is your son's daughter you are speaking to!
She may be my son's daughter, Highness,
but she is also the Princess of Pluto, and I am a common, saucy street
wench.
You are a foolish child, Lora, but I suppose
that is why we all love you so. Do not fret, dearie. Lora will warm up
to you in time. For now, why don't you go back to your world?
It took Setsuna a moment to realize that Helena's last comment was directed
at her. Her eyes popped open. She was back, curled up in her chair. Her
mother smiled at her from across the room. Setsuna lifted her head and
stared at Lady Moira with wide garnet eyes.
"I heard them, Mother!" she breathed. "I heard
the Voices of the Dead."
"I know," said Lady Moira. "I was listening,
too."
