Disclaimer…
Japanese Lawyers: Ahem!
KBM: Where the heck we're you people?
Japanese Lawyers: Vacation…now the disclaimer!
KBM: I don't own them and never will unless I try to rule over the world and kick these stupid lawyer's asses to where the sun don't shine and knocking the living day lights off of them at the same time…
Japanese Lawyers: -____-
________________________________________________________________________
KBM's Talk Show Episode 1:
KBM: Hello my dear readers and so-called crowds! I'm your host KBM!
Crowds: *cheers*
KBM: Today's and also our first guest is…Yami!!!
Yami: *walk onto the stage and sit on a long couch*
Crowds: Yeah!!!
KBM: *sit on her own little couch* ^____^
Yami: Why am I here?
KBM: Because I don't have enough money to pay Chuckey's hospital bills-
Y.Malik: *from the crowds* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!! IT'S STILL ALIVE!! *run for his life*
Malik: *sigh* Here we go again…
KBM: -and this was the only way I could think of making money…
Yami: Just ask me random questions and get this over with!
KBM: That's not how this talk show works Yami…
Yami: You mean we have to play games? I love games! ^___^
KBM: No…we're going to do an interview called Silhouette!
Yami: It has a name? That's new…
KBM: Okay! Let's start!
Silhouette
Crowd: *cheers*
KBM: This is how this works; there are 6 people you know on the back of that screen. As you can see, all you can see is their shadows.
Yami: But I don't know anybody with a head shaped like a dog!
????: *in Alvin and the Chipmunks voice* Don't you dare call me that!
Yami: O___O WHAT THE *beep* WAS THAT?
????????: *also in Alvin and the Chipmunks voice* Watch your mouth young man!
KBM: As I was saying…all their voices are like that because after what they say about you, you might want to beat the bloody *beep* out of them and their head is shaped like that because I put a board shaped like one so you won't know who that person is by their hair style
Yami: Oh…
KBM: Anyways say hi to the people who came!
Yami: Hi…
People On the Back: *in Alvin and the Chipmunks voice* Hello!
Yami: Can you please change that voice thing? It's driving me crazy! ___
KBM: No…and here's the question: Does Yami fear of anything?
Yugi: *holding a sign saying, "Yes"* (A/N: That's how they answer questions)
Grandpa: *No*
Joey: *No*
Seto: *Yes*
Yami's Mom (Mom for short): *Yes*
Yami's Dad (Dad for short): *No*
Yami: o__O;
KBM: With the ones with yes, explain your selves
Mom: When he was little, he hated taking bath and I think he still is…old habits never change…
Yami: I WHAT?! O_____O
KBM: O___O *inches away from Yami*
Mom: Did I mention that he cuts his toenails about once a year?
Yami: *jaw dropped*
KBM: Oh god…
Seto: MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (imagine that with Alvin and the Chipmunks voice)
Yami: O_____O;;
Seto: MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-
KBM: SHUT UP! YOU'RE SCARING THE READERS!
Yugi: Eeerrr…what happen to the sensor machine?
Bakura: *from back stage* Hehehehehe *evil grin*
Seto: Sorry…I also raised yes because I know what he's really afraid of…
KBM: What is it?
Seto: It's the great Seto Kaiba!
Yami: Eh? O___o
Seto: Yes, he's afraid! Fear the great, genius, handsome, and lastly sexy Seto Kaiba!!!
Yami: We know it's you Kaiba…the board with a big nose…
Seto: *doesn't pay attention* MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
KBM: SOMEBODY PUT A SOCK ON HIS MOUTH!!
Joey: *puts a sock on Seto's mouth* ^____^
Seto: MMMMMMFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
Yugi: ^____^;
KBM: And the last person?
Yugi; He's afraid of Yugi getting hurt! ^_________^
Yami: I agree…^___^;
Mom: Aaaaaaawwwww…how cute! Who is this girl named Yugi?
KBM: *laughs*
Yami: Eeeerrrr…don't you know him?
Mom: HIM?!?! O____________O
Dad: O__________O
Joey: Looks like these people don't know that you're gay eh Yami?
Yugi: *blushes*
Yami: *blushes*
Dad: GAY?!
Mom: My little baby is gay?!?! What did I do to deserve this?
Yami: MOTHER?! O_________O
Mom: Hello there honey…how are you today?
Yami: O_____O Oh Ra…
Mom: Answer me my cute little sugar lump! ^______^
Seto: *laughing his guts off*
Yami: I'm fine mother…-_____-
Mom: AHEM!
Yami: I'm fine…*whispers something*…
Mom: I can't hear you!
Yami: I'm fine…mommy…-_____-
Everyone: PUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! MOMMY!!
Grandpa: Don't worry Yami! Yugi say that to his mother when he was little!
Yami: That doesn't help me a bit…
Yugi: Don't worry Yami-chan!
Yami: You're there too Yugi?! O___O
Yugi: ^____^
Mom: You're Yugi?
Yugi: Yes ma'am! *give her a sweet little smile trying to earn some scores from Yami's mom*
Mom: Such a sweet little child!
Yami: ^________^ I know!
Dad: -____-
KBM: The next question is: Is Yami girly sometimes?
Yami: WHAT THE HELL!
Seto: *Yes*
Yugi: *No*
Dad: *No*
Mom: *Yes*
Joey: *No*
Grandpa: *No*
KBM: Why?
Seto: I saw him cross-dressing! ^_______^
Yami: O________O
Mom: How sweet of you to do that pumpkin!
Yami: I DO NOT cross-dress!
Yugi: I think you'll look good in a dress though Yami-chan!
Yami: *blushes*
Mom: Indeed he does! I always dress him like a little girl! ^___^
Dad: Such an embarrassment to the family!
Mom: I wanted a little girl but all I get is a boy! ___
Dad: I prefer a girl than this kind of a…boy!
Yami: -___-; Great…my dad still hates me after 5000 thousand years…
Yugi: *big-watery-puppy-dog-eyes* Do you really hate Yami-chan?
Dad: Cuteness…can't…resist…*looks like a vampire with a silver cross in front of his face*
Yugi: *power up his big-watery-puppy-dog-eyes to max cuteness*
Dad: I give up…-____- I love you son…
Mom: I like you Yugi! I give you my permission to marry my son!
Yugi: Thank you mother!
Mom: *glares*
Yugi: Thank you mommy! ^___^;;
Yami: ^___^;;
KBM: Next question is: Do you know what kind of underwear Yami is wearing?
Yami: O________O
Yugi: *blushes* *Yes*
Seto: *YES!*
Joey: That's sick!
Mom: *No*
Dad: *NO*
Grandpa: NO
Yami: 2 people had yes on…and one of them is Yugi…100%!
Mom: Don't you dare kill your wife/husband Yami! Or I'll ground you for the rest of your life!
Yugi: Thank you mommy!
Mom: Your welcome sweet heart!
Yami: Aren't you supposed to be my mom?
Dad: Why did I marry her again?
Mom: What the HELL was THAT supposed to mean Mr.? *death glares*
Dad: That's why…^___^;
Yugi: So that's where Yami got his glare from! I thought it was from his dad…
Seto: Yami's dad is afraid of some old woman! *laughs*
Mom: OLD? *veins popping out from her head*
Seto: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK
Yami: Don't you dare call my mommy old!
Yugi: Yeah, you bastard! Call her that again and I'll kick your shitty ass to where the sun don't shine while knocking the living daylights off of you then rip your guts out with my bare hands in the Shadow Realm! ___
Everyone: *stare at Yugi* O_______O
Mom: Such a sweet little child! ^____^
Dad: Hehehehehehehehe…that makes two of them…
KBM: Nobody answered my question!
Seto: Pink boxers with bunnies on them! ^___________^
Yami: O_____O
Pegasus: *from the crowd* Is that Funny Bunny?
Seto: Eeerrrr…yes…it is…
Pegasus: How much for your boxers Yami-Boy?
Everyone else: *jaws dropped to the ground*
Yami: HENTAI!
Pegasus: I am not! *from his jacket, bunch of hentai doujinshis falls down to the ground* ^___^;
Yami: O______O
KBM: GUARDS!
Vampire Lord: Yes master? (I just love that monster!)
KBM: Take the Unicorn-Boy out of here!
Vampire Lord: Yes master!
KBM: It's mistress! I'm not a guy!
Tea: You sure look like one!
KBM: -____- Kaizer Seahorse!
Kaizer Seahorse: Yes ma'am?
KBM: Take Tea out of my sight forever!
Kaizer Seahorse: Yes ma'am!
Yami: Finally…^___^
KBM: Next question!
Yami: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-
Dad: Stop screaming boy!
Yami: *stops*
Grandpa: *sleeping* zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Joey: I'm hungry…
KBM: Wait…that's all for today!
Yami: *sighs*
KBM: And on to the next interview!
Yami: Another one? O___O
KBM: Yup! And it's called My Reflection! Before we start, let's say good-bye to the guests!
Yami: I'm out of here!
KBM: Except you Yami!
Yami: -____-
My Reflection
KBM: My Reflection is very easy!
Yami: Like?
KBM: But first of all, we have Japanese version of Yami as our guest!
Yami: O____O
Japanese Yami (J.Yami): Konichiwa…
Yami: o__O;;
KBM: *uses her authoress power s they can understand each other* ^___^;
J.Yami: Nice to meet you
Yami: I sound so…young O____O
J.Yami: I sound so old like Kaiba…-_____-
Seto and J.Seto: *from the crowds* SHUT UP!
Yami and J.Yami: YOU SHUT UP YOU SELF-CENTERED-BLUE-EYES-LOVING-I'M-MR.SMARTYPANTS!
Seto and J.Seto: O______O
KBM: Japanese Yami sounds younger because of 2 reasons!
Yami: Like?
KBM: 1, Because dubs are VERY evil
J.Yami: Go on…
KBM: 2, It's because of the fact that Yami is 2000 older than J.Yami
Yami and J.Yami: O_________O
Yami: I'M 2000 FUCKING YEARS OLDER THAN MY ORIGINAL SELF?!
J.Yami: You should watch your mouth, our hikaris are watching us
Yugi and J.Yugi: *waves*
Yami and J.Yami: *drools* 2 Yugis…^__________^
KBM: We have another guest!
Yami: Not another one…
J.Yami: o__O
KBM: Yami!
Yami and J.Yami: WHAT?!
OAV Yami: Hello! Nice to meet you!
Tea and Anzu and OAV Anzu: 3 Yamis…*drools*
KBM: FUCK! WHERE THE HELL DID THEY CAME FROM?
Vampire Lord: I'm sorry mistress!
Kaizer Seahorse: I'm, too, very sorry mistress!
KBM: TAKE HER AWAY! PLEASE!
Yami: Too many of my self…but how come OAV Yami like a girl?
J.Yami: Familiar too…
KBM: It's because his voice actor is a girl!
Everyone else: O_____O
OAV Yami: But OAV Yugi's voice is so cuter! ^______^
OAV Yugi: *blushes* Thank you…
Crowd: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwww…
OAV Yami: ^____^
KBM: Anyways, in this corner, we'll tell ghost stories!
J.Yami: I still want to know what on earth OAV Yami sounds so familiar! ___
KBM: Yukito!
Yukito: (from Card Captors) Yes?
Everyone except OAV people and KBM: O_______O
KBM: Does that answer your question?
Yami: …
KBM: Fine then, SHINJI!
Shinji: (from Evangelion) I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away…
Yami: o__O
KBM: Anyways, who want to go first?
J.Yami: I'll go first!
J.Yugi: GO YAMI!
J.Yami: ^____^
Seto: START ALREADY!
J.Yami: Okay, my story is called, The Journal-*scary music plays* o__O;;
Sky: *from the crowd* *rips her hair* AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!
KBM: -____-
J.Yami: Anyways…A boy named…*thinks*…Kaiba-
Setos: -_____-
J.Yami: -was living on a 2 story house with his parents, grandmother, and his younger brother…one day, he was playing in the basement when he found a journal…
OVA Yami: *interested*
Yami: *thinks* It can't be scarier than what I have…hehehe…
KBM: *evil grin*
J.Yami: On the cover of the journal, it said, "Read one page per day." Kaiba turned to the first page…inside it said, "Today, my parents died of car accident." Kaiba thought it was just a joke made by his little brother…until that night, his parents really did died of car accident…
Yugi: *holding onto the J.Yugi and OAV Yugi*
J.Yugi *the same*
OAV Yugi: *ditto*
J.Yami: Kaiba got upset because of it so he threw the journal to the garbage can…but after few days, the journal was at the same place where he found it…
Everybody else: *silence*
J.Yami: He opened the journal, and read the second page…it said, "Today, a burglar robbed everything in the house and killed my grandmother and my little brother." The same thing happened that night. He was so freaked out, he burned the journal…but the next day, that journal was still there…good as new…with a sigh, he opened to the third page. When he read it, Kaiba died of heart attack…
Crowd: …
J.Yami: In the journal, it said, "Today, all of my family had been reunited"…BOO!
Crowd: *startled and jumps back* AAHH! O___O
J.Yami: *laugh his guts off* AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
KBM: My turn!
Yami: Why you?
KBM: Cause I said so!
Yami: -____-
KBM: Okay here it goes, it all started on a Dance Studio…*light fades leaving only a glint of lights with scary music from the background*
Tea and Anzus: O____O
KBM: There was a girl named Tiara. She were always the best. She was beautiful, smart, and she always won the 1st prize in the nations. But then this girl named, Tea-
Tea: -____- I knew it…
KBM: -became very jealous of her because she always loses to her and she hated getting 2nd prize…on one rainy night, Tiara died because her car fell off from the cliff because the ground was so slippery.
Anzu: ^_________^
KBM: Because of her death, Tea always won 1st prizes. 1 year later, on the same day Tiara died, Tea also had the same exact accident at the exact same place. Luckily, Tea's parents survived. But "poor" Tea had died.
Tea: -______-
KBM: But all of the sudden, Tea got up from the hospital bed, and she started to dance! Her parents thought that because she loved to dance so much, even after death, she still dances. They took a picture of her dancing.
Tea: *sniff* That's so beautiful…
Anzu: I know…
OAV Anzu: I have to agree *sniff*
KBM: After about a year, Tea's parents found the film. They forgot to develop the film. When they finally developed the picture, their face was pale as the ghost's…
Yami, J.Yami and OAV Yami: *curious*
KBM: On the picture, above Tea, was Tiara, yanking Teas' hair around with an evil grin on her face…
???: *falls from the sky in front of the Yamis* SPLAT!
Yami, J.Yami and OAV Yami: *jumps out of their sofa* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH! O_______O
Crowd: O_______O AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!
KBM: *laughs like a maniac*
Yami: What's the meaning of this!? *very mad*
KBM: You should have seen the look on your faces! ^________^
J.Yami: What the hell was that?!
OAV Yami: It's…*examine the thing* it's…a wig? O__o;;
KBM: YOU'RE AFRAID OF A STUPID PIECE OF WIG! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Yami: That's not funny…
KBM: On with the next show…^___^
Yami: Not another one…
KBM: Don't worry! You won't get tortured!
Yami: *sigh*
KBM: But Bakura is! Here's the footage from a hunted forest!
*a video plays on a large screen*
Kiera: Hello there! My name is Kiera! One of KBM's best friends!
Zayanna: I'm her other best friend Zayanna! But call me Fuu!
KBM: Fuu for Food!
Kiera: We're at this hunted forest to meet a special guest!
Zayanna: And here he comes!
Bakura: Why am I here?
Kiera: You're going to be the next guest for KBM's talk show so you must take this test
Bakura: But that pharaoh didn't take this stupid test!
Zayanna: It's because it's the first show now shut up!
Bakura: -___-
Kiera: Here are the instructions, you are going to go to a hunted cabin straight ahead, you have to get something in the main room where there are some stuff hanging from the ceiling…it's dark so you have to make sure you have the right item since there are few different items…you are expected to come back to the tent we are in right now and we'll be waiting for you!
Zayanna: You'll have to get…*take out a paper from a jar* an…underwear? O___o;;
Bakura: Don't I get a flashlight?
Zayanna: No
Bakura: *leaves the tent*
Bakura: *in front of the cabin* This place seems old…
Vampire: *comes out of nowhere* *grabs Bakura*
Bakura: -____- I'm so scared…*knock the vampire out cold*
Vampire: X___X
*At the tent*
Zayanna He's not getting scared!
Kiera: I think we might need a back up…
*Back to Bakura*
Bakura: This isn't so hard…
Nurse Demon: Hey there sexy! *winks*
Bakura: I spoke too soon! O___O
ND: Come and give me some kiss!
Bakura: *goes into the cabin then locks the door* Hew…
*outside, over the window a small girl can be seen*
Bakura: Like I'm supposed to scared of that! *walk to the main room* One of these is the underwear but I can't see a thing! *grabs something…long that moves around* A snake? *grab something weird* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! MONSTER! *grab the underwear then run* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!
*Inside the tent*
Kiera: What the hell?
Zayanna: o__O;;
Bakura: *huffs* I'm *huff* Here…
Zayanna: Why did you scream?
Bakura: Touched something very weird…
Kiera: Let's check on this night vision camera and see what we have…
*You can see Bakura touching the thing then freaking out*
Kiera: You were screaming at THAT?!?!
Zayanna: And you call your self a man?
Bakura: That was a GREEN ONION?!?!
Zayanna: Wait…what was that little girl?
Kiera: What little girl?
Zayanna: That girl outside the window!
Bakura: Huh?
Kiera: But KBM didn't hired any little girl…she only hired the vampire and some Nurse Demons!
Bakura: *gulp*
Zayanna: Didn't she say that a little girl who lived in that cabin died 78 years ago and nobody ever bought the place because of it?
Little Girl: Tee hee hee! *evil grin*
Bakura, Kiera and Zayanna: O______O AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!
*the tape ends like it had been cut off*
KBM: O___O
Yami: O____O
KBM: My poor friend!
Yami: How sad…
KBM: *change the subject* Well! That's about it folks! Tune in for the next episode! Any questions are welcome! But please put more imaginations on them!
Yami: I'M FREE!! ^________^
KBM: -_____- Make sure to review!