Beautiful
A/N: Hey everyone! This is my second fanfiction, after taking a short break from writing after finishing my first one 'Dream of Me' I am back with another amazing Hr/H fic, and hopefully you will all appreciate this one! This is a song fic, for the song Beautiful by Christina Aguilera. Which I do not claim to own. I also do not own any characters in this story…please read and review, even if you don't like it all that much, I would love to hear your opinion! Maybe things I can do to make it better…
-Chapter Two-
…I am Beautiful
I feel so alone most of time, I wonder if anyone else's husband acts like this towards them. Why does Viktor have to be this way? Why do I have to be this way? To weak fight back, and to afraid to leave. I hope day and night that Viktor will change back to the man I once loved, I should just give up…it'll never happen. When he hits me, it hurts outside, on the surface. When he makes me bleed, makes me want to scream…it also hurts on the inside. My fears are confirmed by this, I have feelings inside. I always try to hide them, never expressing them to anyone. When I show him how feel, or if I tell him, it's a disadvantage. I know I can't go on living my life like this, so uptight…so afraid to express emotion, I know I should tell someone…but I am afraid what will await me afterwards. I'd be alone…and friendless, I'd still be getting four gallons an hour with my dead end job as a waitress. Even if I was to tell someone, I don't know who I would tell…I don't know who would believe me. I am quickly taken out of my thoughts when I feel the cutting pain in my side again.
I hate my life, as I live now. I once loved it…when I still went to school, when I still had friends, and freedoms, and I had a chance to do something great with my life, after I graduated. I chose something different, I chose to be with the one I loved, I chose this life. That's what he says to me when he hears me crying at night. It's my fault…I should have seen it coming. Everything's my fault, or he always tells me it is. He always hits me for it after, since it's always my fault. We he looses a game…when's he's drunk…when's he's mad…when we came barely afford to pay the bills, its all my fault. I get beaten for everything that happens in his life. You would think I'd be use to it by now, but I am never prepared for what he says to me. What he says to make me feel so terrible, so worthless…and so different. I try telling myself that its not me, its him. It's not my fault, but…I think I am even starting to believe it now. His sneers and words are so painful. Keeping my thoughts hidden is almost impossible, but yet…day by day, I keep going, and my life continues. I wish it wouldn't…every morning I am sad…I always wish I died in my sleep, my eyes never to be opened again to the world as it is today. Dirty…loveless…and so pointless.
I push the my fluffy brown hair out of my eyes, streaked with gold from the bit of sunlight I get. I need to talk to someone, I even consider talking to Viktor…but that always ends up with a fight, and with me hiding in the washroom. The thought is quickly rushed out of my head, I look around the darkened room I sit in absently. Eyes falling on every object. My breath caught in my throat when I saw the picture, Ron, Harry, and I smiling and seemingly getting on just fine. I picked up a piece of parchment, and dipped the tip of my pen into the thick black ink. I would write to Ron and Harry. I wouldn't say anything about Viktor…I would just act normally, maybe they would even write back. The thought of someone actually trying to talk to me excited me, and I quickly began to write.