Chapter 3: Here's Yoshi's Island
(So
after a long and twisted trip Wario's ship has reached Yoshi's
Island. Everyone gets off and take a look around the beach.)
Waluigi:
So this is Yoshi's Island?
Mario: It looks like it, but I don't
see any yoshis.
Luigi: That's funny. The beach was the yoshis'
favorite hang out place and...huh? Check out these marks in the
sand.
(Everyone looked at the sand in front of Luigi.)
Wario:
This looks like...a Tic-tac-toe board?
Waluigi: I didn't know
yoshis could play that.
Luigi: Well, if there's a Tic-tac-toe
board, there's bound to be some yoshis around here...
(Suddenly a
purple yoshi dashed out of a nearby bush followed by a pink yoshi.
The purple one wasn't watching where it was going as it ran toward
Mario and Luigi.)
Wario: Move it Mario!
Waluigi: Look out
Luigi!
Mario: Huh?
Luigi: Aieee!
(Wham! The purple yoshi ran
into Luigi and the two of them fell down. Pink yoshi was running too
fast to stop so she rams Mario. They also fall down. Wario and
Waluigi just stand there like idiots.)
Purpley: Oooh...what did I
run into this time?
Luigi: Hi Purpley. Would you mind getting off
me?
Pinky: Oh wow! It's Luigi! Look at this. I ran into the fat
red one.
Mario: (muttering) Hmph. Fat indeed...
(Pinky and
Purpley stood up, then Purpley noticed Wario and Waluigi.)
Purpley:
There's the really fat yellow one and...erm...I don't remember seeing
you before.
Waluigi: Well I don't remember you either.
Luigi:
You dolt! Don't talk to Purpley like that! Don't make me resort to
the Hy-
Waluigi: No! No! No!
Pinky: So the leader
returns...
Luigi: What did you say?
Pinky: I said the leader
returned. You're the leader, remember?
Luigi: What? I said Blacky
was the leader. How's the old guy doing anyway?
Pinky: He's doing
alright. Oh, there's someone that would like to see you. Isn't that
right Purpley?
Purpley: Uh huh. As a matter of fact, I'll go get
her.
(Purpley walked into the forest.)
Waluigi: Luigi, what's
going on?
Luigi: Whoops. Looks like I didn't properly introduce
you to Pinky yet.
Waluigi: No. You didn't. Who's the other
yoshi?
Luigi: That was Purpley and here she comes.
(Purpley
walked out of the forest with a red yoshi, two orange yoshis, a
yellow yoshi, a sea-green yoshi, a blue yoshi and a black
yoshi.)
Pinky: She said she'd only get Yosheta, not the entire
herd. Oh well...
Purpley: Okay guys. Get in a straight line like
Luigi taught us. You know the drill.
(Normally, the yoshis were
good at doing this, but when they saw Luigi they couldn't help but be
a little excited. The ran toward him and started to jump and shout
shout shout...)
Bluey: You're back!
Orangey: Luigi, where have
you been?
Yellowy: Luigi! Luigi! Luigi!
Luigi: Stop jumping!
Ow! Redy, that was my foot! Yow! There goes my other- Waaahhh!
(Luigi
fell face first onto the sand. The yoshis stop jumping.)
Blacky:
Oops. Sorry Luigi. I don't know what come over us.
(Luigi stood up
and dusted himself off.)
Luigi: Mank hoo Waffy.
(Luigi forgot
to spit the sand out of his mouth. Everyone laughs as Luigi spat out
the gritty stuff.)
Luigi: Yuck. I meant to say "Thank you
Blacky" I guess I was in such a hurry and... Stop laughing
Waluigi.
Waluigi: Okay okay sorry. You ought to wash your filthy
mouth out.
Luigi: Um, maybe when I get the chance. All right you
little dinos, line up in rainbow order.
(All the yoshis lined up
so their colors made a beautiful rainbow.)
Luigi: Okie dokie. Just
so you yoshis don't get confused I'll introduce my friends
first.
(Luigi points to Mario.)
Luigi: This is Mario the Glory
Hog.
Mario: Hey!
yoshis: Hi Mario!
(Luigi points to
Wario.)
Luigi: That is Wario the Yellow Guy.
yoshis: Hi yellow
Mario!
Wario: I'm Wario, not Mario! Get my name right, you
punks!
Luigi: And that other dude is Waluigi...
yoshis: Hi
purple Luigi!
Waluigi: What?! How dare you!
Luigi: What did I
tell about talking to the yoshis like that?!
Waluigi:
Uh...er...um...
Luigi: That's what I thought.
Mario: I'm
getting tired. Can you hurry up and introduce the yoshis to us? I
want to unpack.
Luigi: Alright. Pinky you go first. Just tell 'em
your name so we can get going.
Pinky: Hi, I'm Pinky. That won't be
too hard to remember, will it?
Mario: Only if you're a cheeky
scrawny guy that wears orange elf shoes and has a funky
chin...
Waluigi: Hey! You've offended me for the last time!
Wario:
Ha ha! Score one for the fat guys!
Redy: May I continue?
Waluigi:
I oughta use my Dark Stare attack on you.
Redy: Excuse me.
Mario:
Oh. I'm sooo scared. Look, Waluigi wants to stare at me.
Wario:
Weak.
Redy: Luigi, can I-
Luigi: Let me handle this.
Ahem...SHUT UP!
(Mario, Wario, and Waluigi suddenly stopped
bickering.)
Luigi: Mario, was that really really necessary
Mario:
No, but it was too darned funny.
Luigi: Well, Redy was trying to
get your attention. Enough chit-chat. You're wasting page
space!
Wario: Yo Redy, get ready for Waluigi's stare. They say it
causes hypnosis...
Mario & Wario: Bwa ha ha ha ha!
Waluigi:
Grrrrr...
Redy: What does yellow Mario mean?
Luigi: OH FOR THE
LOVE OF...SHUT UP!
(Mario and Wario shut up again.)
Purpley:
Oh! Luigi's cute even when he's mad. Cool!
Luigi: Okay, Wario,
just for that I'm going to go through the names really fast and if
didn't catch it the first time I'm afraid you'll have to ask them
yourselves. Are you ready?
Mario: No.
Luigi: Too bad. (quickly)
This is Redy the red yoshi, Orangey the big orange yoshi, Oshi the
little orange yoshi, Yellowy the yellow yoshi, Yosheta the sea-green
yoshi, Bluey the blue yoshi, Purpley the purple yoshi, and Blacky the
black yoshi...whew...
Mario: Huh?
Wario: Who?
Waluigi: Come
again?
Luigi: Come to think of it, I don't remember Oshi being
this big.
Purpley: He's gone a long way since the last time you
saw him. Kids don't stay kids forever.
Mario: Wasn't the sea-green
one just a tiny thing a year ago?
Luigi: Yeah Yosheta. You got
big...no wait...you got really big. You're almost big enough to
ride.
Yosheta: Thank you for the compliment.
(Luigi nearly fell
over when he heard this.)
Luigi: Whoa! Yosheta speaks!
Waluigi:
This is all good and well, but the sun is setting.
Blacky: That's
not a problem. We can all spend the night at my cave.
Waluigi:
Well, in that case I'll get the suitcases
Mario: And I'll get the
back packs. Be back in a sec.
(Mario and Waluigi take
off.)
Blacky: What's a suitcase?
Wario: Something you carry
stuff in.
Blacky: And a back pack?
Wario: Same thing. Are you
retarded or something?
Luigi: Uh, Wario. There's one thing I
forgot to tell you. The yoshis have had very little contact with
humans so they don't know about that sort of stuff.
Wario: To
think you had to spend a few days here...
(Mario and Waluigi
return. Looks like Mario was nice enough to switch one of Waluigi's
suitcases with a back pack. That should make things easier.)
Waluigi:
Yaaahhh! My back!
(On the other hand, maybe not...)
Waluigi:
Can you hurry up and show me the cave? This rat took my heavy
suitcase and replaced it with a heavier back pack.
Mario: Rat? I
pack good stuff. Did anyone bother packing a flashlight? I know I
did.
Bluey: Strange fellows...
Blacky: Yeah.
(Blacky led
everyone to his cave. It was dark by the time they got there so
everyone had fresh fruit for dinner and bedded down for the night.
Tomorrow Luigi will find that his stay on Yoshi's Island may not be a
walk on the beach...)
