Chapter 5: Zookeepers' First Attack

(It was afternoon now. Luigi and friend began to hike back to Blacky's cave.)
Mario: Is something upsetting you, Luigi?
Luigi: It's those zookeepers. I'm afraid they'll try to dinonap the yoshis.
Mario: That does present a problem.
Luigi: What I don't understand is how they got here. This island isn't even on any maps.
Mario: Do you really think they'd fork over a thousand coins?
Wario: Doubt it...
Waluigi: Do you think they're around here?
Purpley: Oh, what if they are?
Luigi: They better not.
Mario: Well any friend of Luigi is a friend of mine. If they do as much as touch a yoshi I'll give them the worst beating a zookeeper ever took.
(Mario punched the air randomly to show his power.)
Pinky: Oooh, you're almost as cool as Luigi.
Mario: Almost as cool? But I... Forget it. Luigi was here first so he gets some credit.
Waluigi: He wouldn't have got here if it weren't for me.
Mario & Luigi: Who wants your opinion?!
(Some distance up ahead Vicky and Nicky were sitting in a tree.)
Vicky: So what will our first attack be?
Nicky: It's simple really. I'll use my blow gun to shoot a sleep dart at a yoshi. It will then fall asleep and those guys will be forced to leave it there. When it's alone we'll make the capture.
Vicky: A decent plan. Let's do it.
(Nicky got the blow gun out and loaded a sleep dart into it, then put one end to his mouth and waited. Meanwhile Luigi and friends came close to the tree. Nicky took aim and fired.)
Mario: What was that? Ouch!
(The sleep dart had hit Mario in the leg.)
Vicky: Nicky! You nincompoop!
Oshi: Who said that?
Luigi: It's the zookeepers! Run!
(Everyone dashed away from the tree...except Mario. The dart was taking effect already.)
Mario: Hey guys. Wait for me.
(Everyone else had reached the cave safely, but Luigi quickly noticed Mario was gone.)
Luigi: Mama mia! Where'd Mario go? I'm coming for ya big bro!
Wario: Come back here. This place is too scary for you if you're alone.
(Luigi and Wario ran into the forest and found Mario, who was struggling to stand up.)
Mario: Hey guys. I don't feel...so good. I'll just...call upon the...Star Spirits...and...
(Mario started to raise his arms, but then he collapsed to the ground.)
Mario: ...snore...
Wario: This is no time to take a nap.
Luigi: I bet he panicked too much. Would you mind bringing him back?
Wario: I charge five coins for taxi service.
Luigi: Taxi service? This coin thing is getting to your head.
Wario: Just joking. Sure I'll do it.
(Wario picked up Mario and put him over his shoulder, then follows Luigi to the cave.)
Yosheta: Hi Luigi. I see you found Mario.
Luigi: Yeah. I found Mario and there's something terribly wrong with him. Wario, set him down.
(Wario set Mario down on a pile of leaves that were used as a bed. Everyone crowded around him.)
Redy: What's wrong with him?
Waluigi: He's asleep.
Yosheta: What's this?
(Yosheta pulled the dart out of Mario's leg and showed it to Luigi.)
Luigi: Th-that's a da-dart. Th-they sh-sh-shot Ma-Mario. Ha-hand me th- that.
(Yosheta gave Luigi the dart.)
Luigi: Uh oh. This is a big one. Mario may be out of commission for awhile.
Mario: ...snore...I hate...snore...mosquito season...snore...
Luigi: Well, at least he's not dead. Thanks for showing me that. You're such a sweetie.
(Luigi pat Yosheta on the head, then he got serious again.)
Luigi: I gotta make everyone aware of this. Ahem...everyone. I need your attention please. We have just picked up one of the zookeepers' weapons.
(While Luigi was explaining the danger of darts, the zookeepers were still in the tree. An angry Vicky was strangling Nicky.)
Vicky: You wrecked everything, you wrecker!
Nicky: This isn't my fault. Let go of me.
Vicky: You said you'd shoot a yoshi, not that fat guy!
Nicky: Oh why can't the city afford blow guns that have an aiming sight? This really hurts!
Vicky: And worst yet, two other guys carried the red one away!
Nicky: Would you have felt better if I shot them?
(Vicky released Nicky.)
Vicky: Come to think of it, it would have been nice. But you didn't think of it then, did you?
(Vicky started to strangle Nicky again.)
Vicky: Stupid stupid stupid!
Nicky: I hate this job!
(Back in the cave Luigi was finishing his speech.)
Luigi: ...and so you must always be on the lookout. Any questions?
Redy; Yeah. When do we eat?
Bluey: I'm getting pretty hungry.
Waluigi: Ditto.
Oshi: Me too.
Mario ...snore...please pass...snore...the cream...snore...of mushroom...snore...
Luigi: You scare me sometimes, Mario.
Wario: Sometimes I wonder if he can still hear us when he's asleep.
Luigi: That's freaky.
Mario: ...snore...hey...snore...get back here...snore...you freaky turd...snore...
Luigi: That's really freaky.
Redy: I want to eat.
Bluey: I'm getting really hungry.
Waluigi; Ditto.
Oshi: Me too.
Luigi: How do I wake up Mario when he's sleeping like this?
Wario: Try a Hip Drop. It's bound to work.
Luigi: I don't want to hurt him.
Redy: I really want to eat.
Bluey: I really am hungry.
Waluigi: Ditto.
Oshi: Me too.
Wario: Hyper Burn. That move is cool!
Luigi: That's too painful. Mario will kill me for that!
Redy: I really really want to eat.
Bluey: I'm sooo hungry.
Waluigi: Ditto.
Oshi: Me too.
Blacky: There's some fruit in the corner and will you BE QUIET!
Mario: ...snore...huh? What? Will you keep it down. Old Mario's trying to get some rest.
Luigi: Actually, you was shot with a dart.
Mario: I was?
Luigi: Yeah.
Mario: Oh good. I was wondering why my leg hurt.
Wario; Darn. I wanted to wake you up by plugging your nose. Funny results. Honest.
Blacky: Lunch is now being served...
Mario: Lunch?
Luigi: Served?
Wario: Now?
Blacky: Yep.
Wario: Charge!
(Mario, Wario, and Luigi literally ran over Blacky toward the fruit. It was one heck of a feeding frenzy. Bananas were peeled, blueberries were gulped, watermelons were bashed, apples were chewed, grapes were...you get my point.)
Wario: (quickly) Chomp...chomp...chew. Burp! Chew...gnaw...chomp...
Waluigi: I wish he wouldn't eat so fast. He might choke and Mario will have to-
Luigi: Will you knock it off?
Mario: He's starting to annoy me.
(Back with the zookeepers, they had just realized something that they didn't before.)
Nicky: I think my plan had a flaw.
Vicky: I think the flaw is your brain...
Nicky: When I shot that guy, two more came and carried him away. So if I-
Vicky: Your point?
Nicky: If I shot a yoshi, chances are, they'd carry that away.
Vicky: You're right. There's too many of them. We should attack only when they're alone. This may be harder then I thought.
Nicky: Let's go try again tomorrow. It's getting too dark to see right now.
(Vicky and Nicky walk away while barely avoiding the trees that block their dark path. Everyone in the cave were bedding down for the night, but Luigi was having problems. Mario noticed this and tried to comfort him.)
Mario: What's the matter?
Luigi: I don't think I can sleep. What if the zookeepers ambush the yoshis at night.
Mario: They're idiots. It is way too dark outside. Don't worry about it. You might hurt yourself. I already took a nap today so I could watch for them.
Luigi: Would you?
Mario: Sure I would. Good night now.