Disclaimer: I don't own Big Wolf on Campus. Anybody want to give it to me?
Author's Note: Pretty general story. Set during the Stacey season. Reviews appreciated.
Puppy Love
"Tommy? Oh, Tommy. Hello, is anybody home? Hey, Tommy, your fur's on fire. Tommy!"
"Huh?"
Merton rolled his eyes. "Tommy, if you give Stacy anymore attention she'll get a restraining order! Besides, you wolf-out whenever she comes within three feet of you. How about we focus on the math so you don't fail Monday's test?"
"I know, I know. But don't you just love the way she smiles when she talks or the way the light bounces off her hair or how her hips move when she walks or—"
"I get the picture!" Merton closed the math book. "Look, I'm spending my sweet time—time I could be using watching Buffy reruns—helping you study. If you want, I can go ogle Buffy while you ogle Stacy. It'll be Ogle-fest 2000. Do you care if I go? Tommy? Argh!"
Merton stood up, annoyed, and began to walk away. Tommy grabbed his arm. "Wait! I'm sorry. I just—she's so…should we go study at the Lair?"
"Ya think?"
They left The Factory, though Tommy practically walked out backwards so he could see Stacy.
"Maybe I should just tell her," Tommy sighed as they walked back to the Lair. "I mean, if she freaked out I could just…"
"Eat her? Tommy, buddy, I know you like Stacy, but you just can't tell her that you're a werewolf. You've lucky that I was so accepting."
"I could have eaten you if you had freaked out," he replied with a grin.
"You wouldn't have enjoyed it. I'm only tasty to the fairer sex. The fact is, you just can't tell Stacy you're a werewolf. Sorry."
Tommy sighed pitifully, then looked at Merton with a wistful smile. "You know what'd be great? I wish I could trade places with Stacy's dog. That would be perfect. She could be my mistress any day!"
"You would submit yourself to dog food after trying my cooking? I'm insulted!"
They came suddenly to an old woman standing next to a birdbath. She smiled sweetly. "Would you care to make a wish in my wishing well, boys?"
"That's a birdbath."
Her eyes narrowed on Merton. "Did I ask you?"
Tommy laughed at his friend and pulled a quarter out of his pocket. He held it tight in his fist and closed his eyes. "I wish that—"
"You can't say it out loud!" the woman interrupted quickly. "If anyone knows what you wish for then your wish will not come true."
Tommy nodded, closed his eyes again, and after a minute, threw the coin into the birdbath. "You gonna make a wish, Merton?"
"No. Everybody knows what my wish is—Sarah Michelle Geller. On a silver platter. Preferably with no—" he looked at the old lady and blushed, "—make-up on. I'll just stare sadly at the T. V. and sigh."
The woman looked slyly at Merton. "It doesn't have to be that way."
"Yes, it does. You wanna go now, Tommy? I gotta be up early tomorrow for a Goth conference in Chicago. Very big deal."
Tommy shrugged and thanked the woman who just bowed her head. She still wore her sly smile while she watched the boys walk away.
"Ring a bell and foretell the future of the wishing well."
Tommy fell asleep at Merton's house not long after Merton fell asleep. One minute he was explaining the quadratic formula and the next he was asleep on the math book. At least this means I get the bed, he thought to himself and crawled under the sheets.
Six hours later, the alarm clock rang.
Mmm, Merton's sheets sure are soft. And how does he get them to smell so good? And…is that a body next to me? Merton?!
Tommy's eyes bolted open and found that things were not as he had left them. The bed covers were not black. They were pink. The room was painted white with a pink border and little pink flowers decorated the ceiling. There was a lot of pink. There was also a head on the pillowcase. A head with red hair. Curly red hair.
I'm dreaming, Tommy thought to himself. This is a dream. And it's the best dream I've ever had. I'm in Stacy's bedroom!
He decided to move up on the bed so he could cuddle her in his arms. Only, arms were not what helped him move. He had paws. Not werewolf paws. Dog paws.
Stacy! he yelled, but the only thing that came out of his mouth was a bark. Staceeeeey! It was another bark.
"Puppy?" she asked sleepily, lifting her head off the pillow. Her eyes looked down on him and she smiled. "How did you get out from under the covers, you silly dog? Come back here and let's go back to sleep. It's only six in the morning."
What…the hell am I thinking? Dog or not, Stacy just asked me to get under the covers and I'm not going to complain. Comply! Comply!
"'Atta, boy. Now come here." She snuggled right up next to Tommy, pulling him into a hug. She sighed contentedly and let her head fall on the pillow.
Oh, yeah.
"Tommy. Tommy, wake up. I have to go and so do you. Tommy!"
Merton pushed on Tommy's shoulder and tried to rouse his friend. Tommy opened his eyes and growled low.
"Sorry!" Merton yelped, jumping back. "I didn't know you liked your sleep so much. Now just remove yourself to your own bed at your own house and you can get all the sleep you want. Please?"
Instead of getting out of the bed, Tommy got on all fours, sniffed the sheets, pawed at them, then turned around in a circle three times. He finally laid back down and adjusted himself into the covers.
"Is this a joke? I have to get to the conference. Stop acting like a dog and get out of my bed. You're creeping me out, and it takes a lot of skill to creep me out."
Merton stood staring at his best friend for a minute, then got right up in Tommy's face. Tommy didn't look any different, except that he needed to shave a little. Merton opened his mouth to say something but was cut off when Tommy licked his chin.
"Whoa! Tommy, I think we should talk."
Oh…my…gosh.
Stacey had just finished her shower and was toweling off her wet hair. Except that she only had one towel and that was on her head. Which left the rest of her…very well accounted for.
After slipping into some undergarments, Stacey laid back down on the bed, seemingly exhausted from the small effort. "I don't wanna go study," she sighed. It was directed at Tommy, he moved next to her. "All I do is study. I wanna sit around all day eating ice-cream and watching T. V. Is that so much to ask for?"
Ask and ye shall receive, Tommy thought pleasantly.
She scratched him behind his ears and kissed the top of his head. "Well, maybe when I retire. I hope they have television in sixty years." She got out of the bed.
Where are you going? Get back here and keep scratching. Come to think of it, there are a few other things you can do!
The doorbell rang just as Tommy finished whining to himself. Stacey threw on a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt, then ran out of the room.
I am never gonna get any, he thought as he followed her down the stairs.
"Merton?"
Merton?!
"What are you doing here?"
Tommy could hear Merton's nervous laugh from the hallway. "Hi, Stacey. I just…um…I need to ask you if I can…hmm…take your dog for a walk?"
"Why?"
Long pause. "It's for a school project." Why was Merton so bad at lying? "I don't have a dog and I don't know anybody with a dog but you and…please?"
Merton knows? Boy, that was fast. The guy's smarter than I give him credit for. Okay, let's make it look good.
Tommy (or the dog, depending on whose viewpoint he was being seen from) ran up to Merton and tackled him to the ground, licking his face furiously and wagging his tail as fast as he could. When Merton started to sneeze, Tommy got off his friend and stood next to him.
"He seems to like you."
I need some Listerine. Pronto.
"Yippee. So can I take him for a walk?"
"I guess so. Let me get his leash."
"Oh, I don't need that. I have a way with animals. Tom—I mean, the dog, won't stray from my side. You see, animals have a natural respect for me. I command them and they obey. Why just yesterday—"
Tommy grabbed Merton's pant leg and tugged hard, nearly pulling the Goth right off the porch.
Goofball.
"Bye, Stacey!" Merton yelled as Tommy continued to pull him down the sidewalk.
"I figured out a way for us to communicate," Merton said as they walked towards the local park. "I know I can't understand a word you…bark, but you if we use a pattern, then you can answer yes and no questions. Bark twice if you understood me."
Tommy barked twice.
"I think I know what happened, buddy. This morning, when you licked me, I figured something wasn't right. You kept acting funny."
No kidding, Sherlock.
"So I put on the Pamela Anderson biker video and when you didn't react, I knew you weren't you. What I think, is that when you made that wish last night, you wished you could be Stacey's dog. Am I right?"
Tommy barked twice, again. He might be a geek, but he's a smart geek!
"Right. Well, your wish came true and now I have a Tommy body in my bed and a Tommy brain in a dog. Thanks a lot."
Excuse me? I'm the one with the problem here! Tommy growled.
"Okay, we'll focus on you for now. So all we have to do is undo your wish. Unfortunately, I don't know how. Wish making is so tedious. This situation reminds me of the movie "North" in which a young boy wishes for a new family. It starred Elijah Wood whose film career took a sour turn but I think with his new "Lord of the—"
Tommy bumped harshly into Merton's leg, bringing his friend back to reality.
"Sorry. The wish turned out to be a really wild dream. Is this a dream?"
Tommy barked once.
"Okay…all I can think of is that we go back to the wishing birdbath and try to un-wish your wish. We'll have to do it tonight, because I've never seen that lady by the birdbath during the day. Can you get out of Stacey's house tonight?"
Well, it'll be my first time using a doggy-door, but why not? Tommy barked twice.
"Tonight at ten. I'll meet you outside of Stacey's house. And I'll bring Tommy—err—you? I'll bring that thing on my bed."
Merton showed up that night with Tommy's body on a leash. He felt very conspicuous. And very embarrassed when Tommy's brain showed up.
There's a position I'd never hoped to be in, Tommy thought as he approached his friend and body. Let's just get this over with and then I will never make another wish as long as I live.
When he had first become Stacey's dog, it had been a thrill, but after the shower incident, he realized it held no hope. He wasn't gonna get anywhere with Stacey's while he was a dog. Unless…no. He just wasn't gonna get anywhere with Stacey as her dog.
"I really hope this works, Tommy, because I didn't let you out this morning and you peed in my bed. Do you know how hard it is to get pee out of silk?"
They spotted the birdbath but no woman.
"Lady?"
Lady?
"Come on! I refuse to have the brain of my friend in a dog's body! If people thought I was unpopular before, wait until they see me talking to a dog!"
"I thought you didn't care to make a wish."
Tommy, Merton, and Tommy spun around to face the grinning old woman. She held Tommy's quarter in her palm. "Has something changed your mind?"
Great, I'm dealing with a psychopath who wears dentures.
"Hey, Lassie, these are my own teeth! And I'd watch that tone of yours, if I was you. Didn't know I could hear your thoughts, did you?"
"Look, lady, we just want to undo his wish. How do we do that?"
"Certainly not with a quarter! Do you know how worthless a quarter is? It's actual value is only a penny! Where I come from, we use gold and silver. If you don't have 'em, I ain't helpin' you."
I don't carry around doubloons, lady!
She looked at Tommy (the dog). "No real money, no help."
Tommy looked over at Merton who was pulling something off from around his neck. He held it out to the woman. "Will this change his wish?"
It was an ancient, gold coin on a silver chain. She took it from him, turned it around in her hands, then handed it back. "Make your wish."
Yeah! I'm getting a human body! Boy, I never thought I'd be grateful for that.
Merton closed his eyes and made the wish, then threw the coin and the chain into the wishing well (err, birdbath). "Tommy?"
What? I…why was that a bark?
"It will take a little time," the old woman said as she retrieved the jewelry. "He'll be fine by morning. Now take him home and go away. You've caused me more trouble than you're worth."
She disappeared.
Tommy woke up in bed. His eyes opened immediately to take in his surroundings. Black sheets, black bed, gothic museum on the walls—yep. He was in the Lair.
"Merton?!"
Merton opened his eyes blearily. "Wha'? Tommy? Tommy! You're back!"
"I'm human!"
"Well, not exactly. You're still a werewolf, technically, but—"
"Could we just be happy for me?"
Merton sat up on the couch and smiled. "So, what was it like to be Stacey's dog? I was worried you wouldn't want to undo the wish."
"It was nice. At first. But I'm never gonna get lucky with her if I have four legs and a tail. I think I'll just be satisfied to moon over her. At least I got to see a few of the sights."
"Oh?"
"Her hair ain't the only thing that's pretty. What do you say we get some breakfast and finish studying for math? The test's tomorrow and I'm feeling a little more focused after yesterday. And Merton…thanks for saving my butt. Again."
Merton smiled warmly at his friend as he pulled out the math book and a box of double-stuffed Oreos. "Well, there is a reason that I'm the brains of this operation. Now, the quadratic equation…"