Authoress's Note: Don't own "Yu-Gi-Oh." I don't think I have much else to say…
*at some nameless fancy restaurant*
Kaiba: Téa, your eyes look like…
Téa: Yes, Kaiba?
Kaiba: They look a lot like mine. They have no hint of a soul…
Téa: Thank you. I worked for hours on getting that look in my eyes…
*somewhere behind the big, flowering plants that every good restaurant on TV has*
Pegasus: *with binoculars* He's going for her…
Ryou: He is?
Pegasus: *looks again* No, wait, he's just brushing an eyelash off her cheek.
Ryou: This is the most boring thing I have ever done!
Bakura: No kidding.
Yami: Why are we even here?
Bakura: You're not even supposed to be here, Yami. I told you to take Yugi home. How did you know where we were going?
Yami: I was stalking you.
Pegasus: I told you it wasn't my imagination!
Ryou: Aye, and what a big imagination it is!
Pegasus: Where did you learn how to do that accent?
Ryou: Do you have a problem with it?
Pegasus: No. You sound like the guy with those charms on TV… always interrupts my cartoons…
Ryou: Why, thank you, Pegasus…
Bakura: *about ready to blow up* Pegasus, what is Kaiba doing now?
Pegasus: He's on one knee…
Ryou and Bakura: Aaaaw…
Pegasus: She's kicked him in the crotch!
Yami: Ouch.
Bakura: She doesn't know how to properly beat someone up.
Ryou: Yeah, I mean, you beat me up and you do a good job, but I can see it vaguely through the bushes, and she had the wrong form.
Pegasus: She's storming off with tears in her eyes!
Ryou: Ooh… I don't feel so sorry for her…
*at the doors to the restaurant*
Jou-Suit: HELLO, TÉA.
Téa: Hi, Jou. What is it with your voice?
Jou-Suit: I HAVE A SINUS INFECTION.
Jou: Liar!
Jou-Suit: Oh, come on, it was the only thing I could think of.
Téa: So, Jou, what are you doing here?
Jou-Suit: *evil laughter* I HAVE COME FOR YOU. YOU WILL BE MY QUEEN.
Téa: *blushes* Wow…
Kaiba: *limps to the exit* Wait! Téa! Don't go with him!
Téa: I will go with him if I want to! You dumped me!
Kaiba: I only said I was too busy with work to go to Sunday worship with you!
Téa: If you can't go with God, you can't go with me!
Kaiba: And here I thought you had a problem with bisexuals!
Jou-Suit: NOW, YOUR PRECIOUS GIRLFRIEND WILL BE MINE FOR ALL ETERNITY. I WILL PUT HER IN HER FAVORITE OUTFIT AND WE WILL HAVE HOSTS. WE WILL RULE THE WORLD.
Téa: Wait… I don't want to rule the world! I want to get closer to God!
Kaiba: Téa!
Jou-Suit: *takes her by the arm* *goes to spirit her off to my lair*
Kaiba: TÉA! NO!
Téa: Kaiba… you were right… *sob* *screams*
Kaiba: Téa… *starts crying*
*Pegasus, Bakura, Ryou, and Yami run out from their hiding place*
Yami: HAH! Kaiba's crying! Kaiba's crying! *does a dance*
Pegasus: *tries to comfort Seto* It's okay, Kaiba…
Kaiba: No! It's not okay! That – thing – has her!
Ryou: Don't worry, Kaiba. We'll get her back.
Kaiba: *cries hard her* He said he would make her like him… a piece of clothing! *screams at top of lungs* NOOO! *falls onto knees and cries*
Yami: *stops dancing* Okay, this is pathetic. The one time I have a chance to celebrate and he just sits there like a vegetable!
Bakura: I agree with you… I don't really like his actions, either…
Pegasus: We'll have to get Téa back somehow. Someone needs to deposit Mr. Vegetable somewhere safe so he won't get mugged.
Yami: I'll take him home. Yugi's Grandpa would love to watch the billionaire. He might even put the mental breakdown in the news. *picks up Seto and leaves*
Bakura: I have a stash of makeup in my soul room…
Ryou: I have a stash of weapons…
Pegasus: I have a stash of dresses in my Eye…
Everyone: LET'S GO!