A PITCHER OF LEMONADE
DBZ © Akira Toriyama, Bird Studios, etc.
FanFiction © Stef-chan
Idea and Inspiration By: Pudgoose (ID: 118051) …Snickers…
"Darn it, Goten! You drank the entire four-gallon pitcher of lemonade!"
The seven-year-old boy shrugged his shoulder, eyeing the pitcher innocently as if he had no association with it whatsoever. His older friend, Trunks, irritably pushed away the pitcher and yanked open the refrigerator to find something else to appease his thirst, only to find nothing. The two had spent the past two hours sparring after Trunks's father, Vegeta, had barked out that the two boys were becoming extremely lazy.
"What the hell is wrong with this generation?!" Vegeta had shouted angrily when he had caught sight of the two munching on greasy chips while playing Trunks's newest video game. "When I was your age, I was stronger than both of you combined!"
Of course, it was a lie, but the boys had bought it and out of indignation, the two had immediately initiated into a furious sparring match in attempts to show the Saiya-jin no Ouji that they were indeed capable of being stronger than they looked. Vegeta had been satisfied, and out of the satisfaction, had decided to train as well, locking himself up in the gravity room once more.
The result proclaimed Goten the victor, which was a rare thing indeed considering the fact that Trunks was somewhat stronger and was capable of flying, unlike his counterpart. And because Goten had ended up as the victor, and no matter how many times the best friend had apologized, Trunks was in a very foul mood indeed.
"There's nothing in the fridge but orange juice and water!" the eight-year-old growled, slamming the refrigerator door shut and swiping the lavender strands of his hair out of his eyes. "You always ruin everything, Goten."
Goten winced and shifted his feet. He was sorry. He really was. But Trunks couldn't win all the time, right? That would be a little unfair.
"Sorry," he repeated for the tenth time now. "Orange juice tastes good though."
"Well I think it's nasty," the friend scowled, but then at Goten's anguished expression, he let out a sigh. "Nevermind. It's ok, Goten. Don't start crying or whatever like a little pansy. I was close to winning, anyway."
"Yeah, you were," Goten responded, his happiness restored almost immediately. He moved his arms and swiped the sweat off of his forehead. "Whew! We haven't sparred like that in a long time! That was kinda fun."
Twitch. Twitch. Only 'cause you won…
"Yeah, I guess," Trunks murmured, but then his blue eyes brightened. "Hey, dad's really busy training in the gravity room, so that means we can finish our game! What do you say?!"
A response wasn't needed, for the two had already raced up the stairs towards Trunks's bedroom, ready to finish up the video game that they had failed to accomplish before Vegeta's interruption.
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Rewind
Vegeta and Trunks never failed to notice the fact that the woman of the house, Bulma Briefs, was missing at the breakfast table. For the oddest reason, they found it hard to swallow their food without her presence, for normally always in the morning, Bulma kept breakfast somewhat entertaining by either chattering away or arguing with the head of the table.
She had left a note on top of the prepared breakfast, informing the two of a new rug store in city that was having a grand opening sale: 50% off all items for the first hour that it is opened. It was a rare thing indeed, and as a shop-a-holic, Bulma had woken up extra early just to make it on time before most of the better rugs were all sold out. They couldn't complain of her absence though, for a few days back, Bulma had thrown a hellish fit after both of them had spilled drinks on her favorite rugs. They had gotten an entire earful about that.
"Another spill on a rug and you two are DEAD MEAT!"
It had become a law, and despite the fact that Trunks was stronger than his mother, and Vegeta was definitely never the one to curve into anyone's wishes, they both had no other choice but to obey Bulma's laws. Women were scary in that manner. Especially women like Bulma.
The two must have been thinking along the same lines, for both shuddered at the same time.
"Think she's buying an expensive rug?" Trunks asked after finishing another bowl of rice. He eyed his father, who looked up at him from his food. The Saiya-jin snorted.
"Knowing the woman, she's buying the most expensive one possible. You better not spill anything on that rug, boy," Vegeta growled, and just to get things straight, he quickly added, "For your sake."
Right at that moment, the two heard the garage door open and close, and heard struggling footsteps making its way towards the breakfast table. Dressed in her usual classy clothing, Bulma was dragging in a roll of rich, cream-colored rug with violet flowers embroidering the edges. It was, even in the eyes of boys who could care less, very pretty.
"So, boys, what do you think?" she questioned as she laid it on the ground and rolled it out. She grinned. "Am I a professional shopper or what?"
Trunks took a bite out of his eggroll.
"It's a rug." Hell would rot before he would agree that some stupid rug was pretty.
"Damn straight it is! And an expensive one, too! Remember, if either one of you mess this baby up and I swear… I'll chop your heads off and place it at the corner of my desk as a trophy. GOT IT?!"
Fast Forward
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It just wasn't either one of the boys' day at all, for in every round of the video game, Goten seemed to luck out as the winner. It was leaving Trunks in a foul mood—he hated to lose in anything (especially to Goten since, in his point of view, he was too "Kakarot"), and it left Goten wincing.
He didn't mean to win. It just happened. In the third round, he had even played with his eyes closed and the game controller held upside down. It was not his fault at all, as it was probably Dende, who cruelly wanted Trunks to be super mad at him.
"I don't get it," Trunks murmured, tossing the controller away from him as if it was contaminated with a deadly disease. "This thing must be rigged."
"Wanna use my controller instead, then?" Goten questioned, holding out the device towards his friend. Trunks shook his head. "You're not mad, are you?"
"Me? MAD?! Of course not. I don't get mad over stupid video games."
"I thought this was your favori—"
"This game isn't even worth my dad's socks. What a waste of a good amount of allowance," the demi-Saiya-jin complained, scowling all the while in complete fury. "I had to take care of the trash everyday for the past two months to earn enough money to buy this thing. …Maybe I'll get mom to help me sue the company or something."
"With what charges?"
"I don't know, but the game is rigged and that just has to be illegal."
Goten shrugged and looked at the screen of the television, making sure to remain quiet as not to provoke his friend's temper. Trunks had called it quits at round five, which had been the water scene. As of now, the television screen was displaying an image of a large waterfall crashing down upon Trunks's dead character, while Goten's continued to dance like a constipation victim while throwing in hand peace signs.
As the two boys continued to there, one mulling over losing the game and the other just trying to think of something productive to say, the sound of the waterfall remained echoing out of the television speakers.
Goten squirmed.
Trunks sighed and reached over to shut the game off, grabbing his television remote control in the process to search through the many satellite dish channels for anything interesting to watch. The number of channels was countless. He dully pressed the triangular button, stopping once at the food channel, in which a woman began to smell her own creation after pulling it out of the oven.
"Mmm… You can almost smell the rich, warm melted butter that's been poured onto this delicious…"
Goten squirmed.
Trunks flipped the channel and stopped at an interesting commercial.
"…A thirty-day guarantee! This device will ensure that your toilet will never clog again! Just pour the green liquid into the water and flush. Then sit back and enjoy watching the water slowly go down…down…down…"
Goten squirmed.
Trunks flipped the channel once more and stopped at the, what Trunks liked to call, The Stress Relieving Channel.
"…Just breathe. In…out…in…out… You're swimming in warm water. So soothing…so comforting…so warm… You are floating…You are—"
Goten squirmed one last time before he quickly jumped up onto his feet and began hopping on one foot to another.
"Trunks," he whined, his hands clasped together in between his legs as he continued to hop on each foot. "Trunks, I gotta go. I really, really gotta go." When Trunks yawned and flipped the channel nonchalantly, and then lazily turned to look at his friend's little dance, Goten whined louder. "C'mon Trunks! I really gotta go! I think I drank too much of your grandma's lemonade. Truuuunks!"
"Well then go already," the boy responded, flipping to another channel.
"But I don't know where the bathroom is! I've never been to the bathroom in your house before. Truuunks!!"
Trunks flipped to another channel and looked at his friend again, then smirked. "Oh that's right. Your mom always calls and orders you to go home before you stay here long enough to use the bathroom," he said mockingly. "Okay well just go down the stairs, turn left, and then turn right into the next hallway. There you'll see a hall of doors. Don't go inside the closed doors because that's my parents' bedroom and a couple of my mom's rooms with all the capsule junk. She gets pretty pissed whenever someone walks into those rooms. So like…yeah. The bathroom should be the only room with the door open."
Goten nodded and sped out of the room quicker than Trunks could blink, and once out of that bedroom, Goten quickened his pace. Down the stairs… He ran down the stairs. …Turn…wait. Was it left first? Or right? …Shoot! …It was left. I think. He steered himself left, and sure enough, he saw another hallway. He turned right. And there in front of him was the hall of doors that Trunks had told him about.
Yet…which room? For all of doors were closed!
Goten winced as he continued to hop from one foot to another. With nervousness, he opened the door nearest to him, and saw a dark room with a desk and a bunch of notes lying around. He whined and shut it, then opened another door. In that room was a room with shelves for walls, and those shelves were filled with books and documents. He whined again and tried another. And another. And another. Two doors left.
Goten clutched onto "the area" as he sang himself the "eeny-meeny-miney-mo", eventually choosing one room over the other. He peered inside and, to his disdain, found himself staring at a large bed next to a lamp stand cluttered with picture frames of a scowling Vegeta and a smiling Bulma. The master bedroom. Goten whined loudly this time and slammed the door a little too hard. He growled and turned to his left to open the very last door, but once he did, he just could not hold it in any more.
On top of a large rug that he was standing on, was a puddle.
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Perspiration dripped down the side of his head and down the large widow's peak. He swiped it off with his forearm and tried to calm down his pacing heart that beat like a drum raging for war. His usual navy blue spandex material was drenched in sweat, and his hands were clammy as he touched the door of the gravity room and walked out. Training had gone unusually well today; he supposed that seeing Goten's face helped clear up a mental image of "Kakarot" so that every drone that the GR threw at him resembled his rival.
Training was always easier whenever that was the case.
With a proud smirk on his face, he walked his way around the house towards his bathroom, where he would take a shower before the Woman would get home from another hour of shopping. She always complained the foul stench of sweat—it was not nearly as bad as the horrible perfumes she wore, he thought, but when you were stuck with a woman who had a sharp, deadly tongue, it was best to oblige. Besides, a nice hot shower appealed to him just fine.
He swung his dirty white towel behind the back of his neck and tilted his head left to right to crack the muscles. He stopped abruptly, however, when he stepped on something very wet. Scowling, he took a quick step back to see a puddle on the new rug Bulma had bought.
His eyebrows furrowed.
"BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Almost immediately, Trunks flew over to his father, followed by a Goten who seemed to want to take his time in catching up with his friend. Trunks stood in front of his father, looking solemnly up at Vegeta with eyes that shone of respect.
"Yeah?"
"What is this?!" Vegeta growled, pointing to the puddle. Neither residents of Capsule Corporations noticed Goten grimacing. Trunks walked over to look at the area Vegeta was pointing at. "What the hell did your loud mother say about beverage spills?! What are you trying to do, boy, get the harpy to scream her lungs out at us?!"
"B-But I didn't do it!" Trunks protested, eyeing the yellow stain. He raised his hands up and gave the Saiya-jin no Ouji a look of both innocence and mortification. "You know just as well as I do how scary mom can get! I swear it wasn't me! I didn't even get to drink all the lemonade! Goten drank it all!"
Vegeta sharply narrowed his eyes at Goten, who jumped back nervously.
"I…I…" the boy stuttered nervously. Color rose to his cheeks and before he could tell them what happened, he quickly blurted out, "I didn't spill any lemonade! You know that, Trunks! I drank it all in the kitchen, remember?!"
"Oh yeah…" Trunks murmured, and Vegeta's strict glares were once again directed at his son. The demi-Saiya-jin stammered, and even took the time to stamp his foot indignantly to highlight his frustration. "But I swear I didn't do it. I would never even think about bringing something to drink near mom's rug! I PROMISE!"
Goten took a few steps back, his face jumping from rosy-cheeked to deathly pale. He thought back on how he had had his accident on that rug—it had not been his fault! Not entirely, anyway. The last thing he would have wanted was Trunks's parents getting super, super, SUPER angry with him!
He remembered how he had quickly gone into the bathroom to finish off his business, and then had flared his ki to dry himself up. Before anyone could catch him, he had sped his way over to Trunks, who was still dully staring at the television in complete boredom. Everything seemed to be going so well! Why did Vegeta have to stop his training now?!
Things could not have gotten worse, the three believed, but they were proven wrong when Bulma strode into the hallway with five shopping bags in tow. At the sight of the three huddled together at the end of the hallway, a turquoise brow rose with suspicion. She did not quite like what was going on.
"Damn it, she's home," Vegeta growled under his breath. "Bulma, you have the most despicable timing ever!"
"Do I, really? Let's call it women's intuition," Bulma responded as she dropped her shopping bags and strode on over to the three. "Now what, pray tell, is going on?"
Goten's stomach tied into knots and he crossed his fingers behind his back while mentally chanting a prayer to Dende. His dark eyes followed Bulma's movement, who seemed to take her time in walking over to the boys, as if reveling in their fear and trepidation. Once she reached her destination, however, she immediately caught sight of the stain on her new rug and her face flushed red and her eyes flickered angrily.
"VE-GE-TA! TRUNKS!" Bulma exclaimed, causing both to stiffen. Bulma fell to her knees and stared at the stain. "I JUST BOUGHT IT THIS MORNING! THE SALE IS OVER! I CAN'T GET ANOTHER ONE! DO YOU KNOW HOW LUCKY I AM TO BUY IT FOR THE PRICE THAT I BOUGHT IT FOR?! THIS RUG IS PRICELESS, DAMN IT! LOOK AT THAT STAIN! HOW MANY TIMES DID I TELL YOU TWO THAT I'M TIRED OF BUYING NEW RUGS BECAUSE OF YOUR CARELESS SPILLS?!"
"I didn't drink anything, woman!" Vegeta growled, inaudibly cursing the idiot who had made the stupid mistake and had left the punishment on his shoulders. "And the boy claims to be innocent as well!"
"Innocent my butt," Bulma shouted. "There is NO one else who could have made such a…" She trailed off as she sniffed the rug and blinked. She sniffed it again. And then she stood up with her face scrunched up. "This isn't a drink. It's…well…"
Vegeta and Trunks looked at the stain again (Goten looked up at the ceiling) and both understood what Bulma meant. It was yellow. And if it was not lemonade, then it was probably no other than…
Goten winced and tried to edge his way out of the hallway, but before he was caught, and before Bulma could accuse anyone of using the rug as a toilet, Dr. Briefs's black cat strolled its way into the hallway, weaved in between Trunks's legs, sniffed the stain, and then sat down beside it.
"Kitty must've done it," Trunks murmured before accusingly glaring at his mother and father. "I told you I didn't do it!"
Bulma let out a distressed sigh as she shoed away the cat and gave both her family members a look of sincere apology. She left to give the carpet cleaner a call to get a tip on how to remove animal stains, leaving Trunks to grab Goten's wrist and drag him back towards his bedroom, and Vegeta, who was scowling furiously, to slam the bathroom door shut and turn the steaming water on for a hot shower.
And Goten, once everything was back to normal and Trunks suggested another round of the video game, let out a deep sigh of relief.
Stef-chan's Notes
This one-shotter was edited on August 1, '04. Just a little. Still think it's very poorly written, but I can't seem to make it look and sound like my other fics. Anyway, hope you had a good laugh, because um…Pudgoose and I did. ;;
Stef-chan: Looks at Pudgoose Right?
Pudgoose: Looks at Stef-chan while coughing loudly Um…sure.
Stef-chan: …I won't say a word, Puddy. I promise.
Pudgoose: …Okay.