Disclaimer: I don't know how many times I have to say it, but Hey! If you
have to, you have to. I don't own anything here.
Commencement
I quickly scanned the area. So far there was nothing intimidating about it all. Other vehicles came and went, either not noticing me, or simply not caring. Perhaps my age is what made them not notice. Small and fragile, nothing really separated me from a skinny tree, its leaves being blown away by even the smallest of drafts. It's roots not yet ready to commence reaching for the deeper buried soil below the hard and unforgiving pavement. Even the smallest of birds take no notice of it, just like they do me. The bigger trees simply kept away from it. That's what I was. An unnoticed little tree that might, or might not, survive the block. Will not direct the city's path. Never will it travel the planet. And not a chance to leave for far away galaxies. But today, perhaps, there might be a way for me to escape it all.
Outside the city skirts, lay the city's military base. Though nothing more than a group of old, basic design, buildings, it was still an impressive sight with what it seemed and endless grassy field, with its concrete mark ways signifying airfields, test fields, and target fields. Every Saturday I would stand outside the gates and admire the weaponry that was being repaired, refitted, tested, practiced upon, dismantled, and even cleaned. Nothing made a bigger impression on a soon to be man than the sight of gigantic machines of destruction. The city was one of the luck few, where the military sent every available type and model of weapon of mass destruction. And I saw them all. Thundering giants, or as small as cars. Lightning fast or a crawling slow. Loaded with weapons to only defend itself, to having enough to level an entire city. I had seen them do everything imaginable, and unimaginable. From the basic, to the impossible. From the pretty, to the designs that brought fear to the hearts of even the most valiant of men.
But one thing I had never seen them do, is fight a real war.
I though about that as I parked my vehicle into the finally available spaces. Anywhere I went, it was still the same. Saturday mornings were perhaps the busiest days anywhere. People running errands, doing their long put-off shopping, visiting each other, and doing the things they were not allowed to do during the week. Like finding a comfortable space to relax, eat, sleep well, make love, and yes, even find available space to put one's vehicles in. I got out and joined the throng of people walking for the warehouse I was headed to. One building only, the warehouse advertise having everything, and anything, for anyone. With a building that big, I had no doubt it would. I had come here before, but not alone. It was too big of a building to walk by yourself. Though I had never wanted to come here on my own. I had always accompanied other people for their meager shopping. I was never impressed with anything I saw. But I have to admit that it was not that I was impressed, it was simply to make myself think that, because in reality I had nothing that would help me pay for anything I wanted. I was broke. As poor as a church mouse. But that year I had finally gotten a job. My first job to be exact. With it, I had bought my vehicle. Actually, it was a junker. But at least it was my junker. No more having to ask for rides or favors. To me, this was what lords and princes felt.
I pushed and shoved my way into the warehouse. Its seemingly endless isles beckoning to me, as their products literally pocked themselves out and called at me. But I ignored them all. Another time, perhaps, I would have spent an entire day looking at them. Joining other people as they grabbed, stared, poked, and argued about price and quality. It sure would be fun , but for now I had my mind set on something specific.
I twisted and turned following the overhead projections indicating the area I wanted. It seemed to take forever, constantly running against dead ends, or people that had parked themselves in the middle of an aisle. A man was arguing with one of the workers, about how that item would affect his vehicle if he decided to install it himself. The worker simply said yes, but the warehouse would not cover any damages done. That was the reason for the argument. People, I thought, were too stupid for their own good. Another woman was trying to convince another worker that the piece of paper on her hand gave her a the right to an even bigger discount. Someone in the background turned on a music system, flooding the place with a soft sound. The music had no lyrics, and it wasn't that annoying modern music everyone was listening to. This very old. Every note making itself noticeable. Every instrument dancing with my senses, making me feel a moment of euphoria.
As the music reached its peak, I finally reached the aisles I was looking for. Incredibly there was only one man softly talking to a worker about one of the products. I walked behind them and I saw what they were talking about. But it wasn't what I was looking for. I quickly run up and down the aisle looking for it. But it was nowhere to be found. My heart began to beat. Perhaps they were all gone. Perhaps everyone had noticed them, and had bought every single one. But I knew it was impossible. The item was extremely expensive. Not just anyone could buy something like that. But my mind kept telling that it was true. In the aisles there was not a single one. They were all gone.
A heard of voice behind, and I turned around. It was the worker. He asked if he could be of service. I hesitated for a moment, but finally I asked him. He nodded and told me to follow him. He walked a master in his domain, and I, behind, like a beggar that is about to be fed. But it did not matter. I was finally going to get what I wanted. He turned around the aisle, to the other side and told, matter of factly, that they had ran out of room of room, cause they were so big, they had to put them in an aisle of their own. And though it was expensive, people were buying a lot of them. From children to adults, man and women were now getting either for themselves or someone else. I stopped paying attention to the man, and admired it. Nothing was like it. Unique in its design and perfect in every way.
It was a simulator.
What do I need to run it, I asked. He said it was a basic system, just bigger because it ran three types of simulators. Unlike the others, this was state of the art in video tech. You will be impressed, he told me. But I did not need his reassurance, because my heart already knew.
I was amazed as to how the government would allow such an item, with its realism, to be simply sold to the likes of me. Because of my job, I was now simple worker, and a number to their system. I had been engulfed in the world of business, if you consider cooking a business. Perhaps I was becoming too involved in it, and would never be allow to run real fighting machines. Perhaps my future lay in trying to make money, instead of becoming a hero. It was sad, but at least I knew I had a healthy life ahead of me. Heroes die quickly. I wanted to live a long time. But at least, it seemed, the government and big business, would allow me to play this fantasy out. At least here, I would pilot one of the biggest war machines mankind had ever developed.
=====
I got home as soon as I could, and immediately began the installation. Everything was perfect, as if it and I were long destined to be together. From the moment I activated it, to the moment it told me put down my name and callsign. I was excited, and my fingers trembled with anticipation. Angel, I typed as my callsign. I don't know why I chose that name. Maybe because by calling myself the same as an immortal and celestial being, I would be invincible. Nothing would stop. Or perhaps I wanted something, or someone, to protect me as I stepped out onto the field. I do not know, but maybe I just wanted to protect something, like it is said they do. Perhaps.
The simulator activated completely now. Its lights dancing before me, dazzling my eyes. I was stupefied. It truly was beyond other simulators, if that was what I should call it. Because what I saw before me went beyond my wildest expectations. I could see every detail, sense every groove, sound, smell. It was breathtaking. But I had to come to my senses quick. It asked me to go to the training room. But I was smarter than that. Or so I thought.
I quickly ran to the ready room, and nodded the okay for the launch. Not bothering to see what the mission was about, or what I needed to do. I waited a couple of seconds, and finally I came online. I landed hard, and I felt the shock. I looked at my surroundings. It was a desert. Its yellow sand extending beyond my eyes' reach. The sun beating down on me. The air dry and tasteless I felt it all around me. I decided to move forward. But I couldn't. I pressed every single switch, button, key, pedal I could find, but there was no response. I had the done the most stupid thing one could have ever done before battle. Not train. Now, I was a sitting duck. I kept pressing buttons, hoping something could happen. Suddenly, a radar popped up in front of me. I studied it, and pressed the same key I had used to activate it. It kept changing colors and size. I did not what it all meant. There were dots and squares all around. Green and yellow. To me they meant nothing, because I did not know what they meant. I did not know whether to go towards them, or stay away from them. But even if I knew, it was useless. I did not know how to move. I kept pressing buttons, and again the radar popped up. But this time more dots and squares appeared. But this time they were red. Red, I thought. Red usually means danger. And it hit me. I had just alerted the enemy of my presence. And they were out to get me, even destroy me.
Sweat ran down my frown. My hand started to tremble, and my teeth to clatter. It was getting cold. No, it wasn't. I was about to die. Again, I started pressing everything in sight, and finally, It happened. I started moving forward. Every step a struggle, slowly, through the sand. I kept looking at the radar. The red dots were getting closer. But at least their not too close for combat. But Fate is not a very forgiven woman. In the distance, I saw, coming towards me. Alarms started screaming their infuriating sounds and shrieks. Around me lights blinked furiously. I did not know what to do. What did it all mean. What do I do.
The shock was immense. Never had I ever been so hard as I had in that moment. My head began to hurt. I funny taste in my mouth. Might be blood, or it might not. The body suffers if the mind thinks we are getting hurt. But whether I was truly injured or not, I was in danger. I could see the enemy's outline now. Three of them, quickly moving towards me. I did not know how much more damage I could take, so I decided to do what every real man does. I turned around and tried to run the in opposite direction. But I was still moving to slow. I would never outrun them at this rate. The enemy knew that also, and with every step I felt the enemy's weapons on my back. Piercing me deeper and deeper. The agonizing pain taking over my body, and my senses becoming dull. I could not take it anymore. By now I had proven myself that I could not survive a real battle. But I would not be a coward. I turned again to the enemy, ready to face my own death. Ready to face a honorable death. As I finished turning, to my horror, I found myself face to face with the enemy. It had reached me and I finally saw its ugly head. Every outline and contour still imprinted on my mind. That cold unforgiving stare saying that today I die. But I did not have much time to look as again it started to pound me with everything it had. Alarms going on all around me, and I losing my vision. I did not wish to myself suffer, so I simply closed my eyes. Closed them to not see the enemy. Closed them to not feel my surroundings catch in flames. Closed them to not feel the explosion underneath me. Closed them because I was afraid of seeing myself die.
=====
I opened my eyes, and stared at the screen. I was back in the ready room. I was asked to go back again and facet the enemy in the name of Clan Wolf. I declined. I sat back in my seat and looked to my right. There it was. Telling me to read its contents and learn. This time I knew it would be the wise thing to do. I grabbed the booklet and read its title MECHWARRIOR 2: THE TITANIUM TRILOGY. I smiled. I did not know I would be so impressed by a game I would by at Best Buy.
Commencement
I quickly scanned the area. So far there was nothing intimidating about it all. Other vehicles came and went, either not noticing me, or simply not caring. Perhaps my age is what made them not notice. Small and fragile, nothing really separated me from a skinny tree, its leaves being blown away by even the smallest of drafts. It's roots not yet ready to commence reaching for the deeper buried soil below the hard and unforgiving pavement. Even the smallest of birds take no notice of it, just like they do me. The bigger trees simply kept away from it. That's what I was. An unnoticed little tree that might, or might not, survive the block. Will not direct the city's path. Never will it travel the planet. And not a chance to leave for far away galaxies. But today, perhaps, there might be a way for me to escape it all.
Outside the city skirts, lay the city's military base. Though nothing more than a group of old, basic design, buildings, it was still an impressive sight with what it seemed and endless grassy field, with its concrete mark ways signifying airfields, test fields, and target fields. Every Saturday I would stand outside the gates and admire the weaponry that was being repaired, refitted, tested, practiced upon, dismantled, and even cleaned. Nothing made a bigger impression on a soon to be man than the sight of gigantic machines of destruction. The city was one of the luck few, where the military sent every available type and model of weapon of mass destruction. And I saw them all. Thundering giants, or as small as cars. Lightning fast or a crawling slow. Loaded with weapons to only defend itself, to having enough to level an entire city. I had seen them do everything imaginable, and unimaginable. From the basic, to the impossible. From the pretty, to the designs that brought fear to the hearts of even the most valiant of men.
But one thing I had never seen them do, is fight a real war.
I though about that as I parked my vehicle into the finally available spaces. Anywhere I went, it was still the same. Saturday mornings were perhaps the busiest days anywhere. People running errands, doing their long put-off shopping, visiting each other, and doing the things they were not allowed to do during the week. Like finding a comfortable space to relax, eat, sleep well, make love, and yes, even find available space to put one's vehicles in. I got out and joined the throng of people walking for the warehouse I was headed to. One building only, the warehouse advertise having everything, and anything, for anyone. With a building that big, I had no doubt it would. I had come here before, but not alone. It was too big of a building to walk by yourself. Though I had never wanted to come here on my own. I had always accompanied other people for their meager shopping. I was never impressed with anything I saw. But I have to admit that it was not that I was impressed, it was simply to make myself think that, because in reality I had nothing that would help me pay for anything I wanted. I was broke. As poor as a church mouse. But that year I had finally gotten a job. My first job to be exact. With it, I had bought my vehicle. Actually, it was a junker. But at least it was my junker. No more having to ask for rides or favors. To me, this was what lords and princes felt.
I pushed and shoved my way into the warehouse. Its seemingly endless isles beckoning to me, as their products literally pocked themselves out and called at me. But I ignored them all. Another time, perhaps, I would have spent an entire day looking at them. Joining other people as they grabbed, stared, poked, and argued about price and quality. It sure would be fun , but for now I had my mind set on something specific.
I twisted and turned following the overhead projections indicating the area I wanted. It seemed to take forever, constantly running against dead ends, or people that had parked themselves in the middle of an aisle. A man was arguing with one of the workers, about how that item would affect his vehicle if he decided to install it himself. The worker simply said yes, but the warehouse would not cover any damages done. That was the reason for the argument. People, I thought, were too stupid for their own good. Another woman was trying to convince another worker that the piece of paper on her hand gave her a the right to an even bigger discount. Someone in the background turned on a music system, flooding the place with a soft sound. The music had no lyrics, and it wasn't that annoying modern music everyone was listening to. This very old. Every note making itself noticeable. Every instrument dancing with my senses, making me feel a moment of euphoria.
As the music reached its peak, I finally reached the aisles I was looking for. Incredibly there was only one man softly talking to a worker about one of the products. I walked behind them and I saw what they were talking about. But it wasn't what I was looking for. I quickly run up and down the aisle looking for it. But it was nowhere to be found. My heart began to beat. Perhaps they were all gone. Perhaps everyone had noticed them, and had bought every single one. But I knew it was impossible. The item was extremely expensive. Not just anyone could buy something like that. But my mind kept telling that it was true. In the aisles there was not a single one. They were all gone.
A heard of voice behind, and I turned around. It was the worker. He asked if he could be of service. I hesitated for a moment, but finally I asked him. He nodded and told me to follow him. He walked a master in his domain, and I, behind, like a beggar that is about to be fed. But it did not matter. I was finally going to get what I wanted. He turned around the aisle, to the other side and told, matter of factly, that they had ran out of room of room, cause they were so big, they had to put them in an aisle of their own. And though it was expensive, people were buying a lot of them. From children to adults, man and women were now getting either for themselves or someone else. I stopped paying attention to the man, and admired it. Nothing was like it. Unique in its design and perfect in every way.
It was a simulator.
What do I need to run it, I asked. He said it was a basic system, just bigger because it ran three types of simulators. Unlike the others, this was state of the art in video tech. You will be impressed, he told me. But I did not need his reassurance, because my heart already knew.
I was amazed as to how the government would allow such an item, with its realism, to be simply sold to the likes of me. Because of my job, I was now simple worker, and a number to their system. I had been engulfed in the world of business, if you consider cooking a business. Perhaps I was becoming too involved in it, and would never be allow to run real fighting machines. Perhaps my future lay in trying to make money, instead of becoming a hero. It was sad, but at least I knew I had a healthy life ahead of me. Heroes die quickly. I wanted to live a long time. But at least, it seemed, the government and big business, would allow me to play this fantasy out. At least here, I would pilot one of the biggest war machines mankind had ever developed.
=====
I got home as soon as I could, and immediately began the installation. Everything was perfect, as if it and I were long destined to be together. From the moment I activated it, to the moment it told me put down my name and callsign. I was excited, and my fingers trembled with anticipation. Angel, I typed as my callsign. I don't know why I chose that name. Maybe because by calling myself the same as an immortal and celestial being, I would be invincible. Nothing would stop. Or perhaps I wanted something, or someone, to protect me as I stepped out onto the field. I do not know, but maybe I just wanted to protect something, like it is said they do. Perhaps.
The simulator activated completely now. Its lights dancing before me, dazzling my eyes. I was stupefied. It truly was beyond other simulators, if that was what I should call it. Because what I saw before me went beyond my wildest expectations. I could see every detail, sense every groove, sound, smell. It was breathtaking. But I had to come to my senses quick. It asked me to go to the training room. But I was smarter than that. Or so I thought.
I quickly ran to the ready room, and nodded the okay for the launch. Not bothering to see what the mission was about, or what I needed to do. I waited a couple of seconds, and finally I came online. I landed hard, and I felt the shock. I looked at my surroundings. It was a desert. Its yellow sand extending beyond my eyes' reach. The sun beating down on me. The air dry and tasteless I felt it all around me. I decided to move forward. But I couldn't. I pressed every single switch, button, key, pedal I could find, but there was no response. I had the done the most stupid thing one could have ever done before battle. Not train. Now, I was a sitting duck. I kept pressing buttons, hoping something could happen. Suddenly, a radar popped up in front of me. I studied it, and pressed the same key I had used to activate it. It kept changing colors and size. I did not what it all meant. There were dots and squares all around. Green and yellow. To me they meant nothing, because I did not know what they meant. I did not know whether to go towards them, or stay away from them. But even if I knew, it was useless. I did not know how to move. I kept pressing buttons, and again the radar popped up. But this time more dots and squares appeared. But this time they were red. Red, I thought. Red usually means danger. And it hit me. I had just alerted the enemy of my presence. And they were out to get me, even destroy me.
Sweat ran down my frown. My hand started to tremble, and my teeth to clatter. It was getting cold. No, it wasn't. I was about to die. Again, I started pressing everything in sight, and finally, It happened. I started moving forward. Every step a struggle, slowly, through the sand. I kept looking at the radar. The red dots were getting closer. But at least their not too close for combat. But Fate is not a very forgiven woman. In the distance, I saw, coming towards me. Alarms started screaming their infuriating sounds and shrieks. Around me lights blinked furiously. I did not know what to do. What did it all mean. What do I do.
The shock was immense. Never had I ever been so hard as I had in that moment. My head began to hurt. I funny taste in my mouth. Might be blood, or it might not. The body suffers if the mind thinks we are getting hurt. But whether I was truly injured or not, I was in danger. I could see the enemy's outline now. Three of them, quickly moving towards me. I did not know how much more damage I could take, so I decided to do what every real man does. I turned around and tried to run the in opposite direction. But I was still moving to slow. I would never outrun them at this rate. The enemy knew that also, and with every step I felt the enemy's weapons on my back. Piercing me deeper and deeper. The agonizing pain taking over my body, and my senses becoming dull. I could not take it anymore. By now I had proven myself that I could not survive a real battle. But I would not be a coward. I turned again to the enemy, ready to face my own death. Ready to face a honorable death. As I finished turning, to my horror, I found myself face to face with the enemy. It had reached me and I finally saw its ugly head. Every outline and contour still imprinted on my mind. That cold unforgiving stare saying that today I die. But I did not have much time to look as again it started to pound me with everything it had. Alarms going on all around me, and I losing my vision. I did not wish to myself suffer, so I simply closed my eyes. Closed them to not see the enemy. Closed them to not feel my surroundings catch in flames. Closed them to not feel the explosion underneath me. Closed them because I was afraid of seeing myself die.
=====
I opened my eyes, and stared at the screen. I was back in the ready room. I was asked to go back again and facet the enemy in the name of Clan Wolf. I declined. I sat back in my seat and looked to my right. There it was. Telling me to read its contents and learn. This time I knew it would be the wise thing to do. I grabbed the booklet and read its title MECHWARRIOR 2: THE TITANIUM TRILOGY. I smiled. I did not know I would be so impressed by a game I would by at Best Buy.