Disclaimer: I'm not J.K. Rowling. And the massage scene I got most of it from one of Kathy Reichs' books, so I don't own that too. (I'm not that talented to attempt to write one.) By the way, read her books, they're great!
Rating: R for this chapter. (Notice that I upped the rating…heehee)
Pairing: HP/SS
Author's Note: This has got to be the first time I update so soon. It's barely 48 hours! Wow…I'm amazed by what boredom can do, even to a lazy bum like me! ::Grins:: Oh yes, thanks to everyone that told me stuff about Petunia. Thanks loads, love ya all.
The Red Dragons Order: Thank you! Oh yeah…::screams:: You updated!! ::grins::
Starr Light: Wow, thanks so much. I didn't realize that there was so much info on Petunia. The only thing I knew was that she had a horse-like face…
Viscountess Babbles-On: ^_^ I added that part 'cause I thought it would be funny. Glad you liked it! Thanks!
Frankie the Wonder Wiener Dog: I was wondering if the part where Harry whispered those stuff to Sev was too sappy. Glad that you liked it though. Thank you!
Mikee: Honestly I did not realize that questions like this are common but I thought that Sev, being such an uptight and rule abiding kind of person, would probably find it odd. Yep, of course Dumbledore would have something to say. That would probably be coming up in the next chapter. Thanks for reviewing!
ManicGrace: Thank you! Glad you like it. ^_^
SnapesMistress2002: Thanks for letting me know about the website. It helped me very much. ^_^
Last warning: If you are homophobic or this pairing simply irks you, the back button is there for a purpose!
Right Perfection Wrongly Disgraced
By izean
'Oh well,' he thought as he brought his duvet back into his room, 'since I can't get anymore sleep tonight, I might as well finish up my marking.' He sighed as he picked up a quill and continued to mark Crabbe's essay again.
~*~*~*~
Chapter 5
(The next day)
Severus sat on the couch, tugging several long strands of hair absently and staring unseeingly at the book on his lap. He was fully dressed in robes today, for fear of a repeat of yesterday's happenings. He wasn't about to take any chances. At this moment, his thoughts were still with Harry and all that happened yesterday. Especially the things that Harry told him, assuming that he was asleep.
How was it possible that such a good-looking and popular young man be in love with him? He asked himself for what seemed the millionth time just of today. He himself was hardly in any way handsome and he certainly wasn't awarded Mr Popularity during his own Hogwarts years. He closed the book with a snap and placed it on the table gently. He crossed his long slippered legs underneath him and rested his head back on the couch, closing his eyes.
A knock on his door jarred him from his musings. His eyes opened. "Whoever thought of the phrase 'speak of the devil' is a genius." He sighed to himself and then quickly grabbed the book and left it open on his lap. Trying to look as though he was doing his research, he yelled, "Come in!" knowing that most likely it was Harry at the door.
The door opened and true enough, it was Harry that materialized in front of his eyes. Flashing a quick grin, Harry said, "Hi." Without looking up, Severus managed a rather monotonous "Hello." The latter felt the other end of the couch sink a little when Harry sat down beside him. "Research?" Severus sighed inwardly. That little brat (not that he was one though) never gives up, does he? He nodded.
Peering over his shoulder and irritating him immensely, Harry asked, "Severus, why are you reading the book upside-down?" Looking properly at the book for the first time, Severus found that he was indeed reading the book the wrong way around. The Potions Master glanced at Harry and found that the boy was smirking at him. The young man smiled, eyes twinkling mischievously. "Are you that tired? I thought you were sleeping when I left?"
'If he knew that I was awake when he left, I doubt that he would still come here.' Severus thought to himself and shook his head slightly. In response to Harry's question, Severus closed the book for the second time of the night and then left it on the table. He then rubbed his eyes and said wearily, "I got a headache." Smile still on his face, Harry said, "It's no wonder, saying how uptight you are."
Severus rolled his eyes and retorted, "Isn't it the way I've always been?" A grin from Harry. He had always wondered why Severus seemed to like rolling his eyes so much; it was such a childish thing to do. "Quite true." Suddenly Harry was looking at Severus intently, as though he was attempting to arrive at a decision. The Potions Master was worried. Is Harry going to hug him again? Or worse…kiss him? Finally, Harry seemed to arrive at a conclusion.
He sat closer to Severus, placed both hands on the man's shoulders and turned his body away from himself (Harry). Severus flinched as Harry's hands landed on his broad shoulders and was about to turn back to protest when the young man started to massage the muscles at the base of Severus' neck.
Harry continued kneading across Severus' shoulders and then down his upper arms to just above the elbows, talented fingers teasing out the knots. The fingers continued their way down Severus' back and then began working their way up, both of Harry's thumbs moving in small circles along the edge of a shoulder. Soon, Harry reached Severus' hairline and his fingers made the same type of rotating motions in the hollows below the man's skull.
Severus' eyes closed as he sighed. That felt so good that he felt like melting into a puddle at Harry's feet. "Why the hell are you so tensed up?" Currently unable to form coherent words, Severus answered with a vague "Mnh." Harry smirked as his hands dropped to the small of Severus' back and his thumbs rubbed the muscles paralleling his spine, pressing up slowly, inch by inch. Severus' breathing slowed as he felt himself relax.
Suddenly, a voice in his head that sounds very much like Dumbledore informed Severus of his title and how easy it was for him to lose control of himself and succumb to temptation. Especially because of who is the one who is currently massaging him. He had to admit that he didn't mind losing control now. 'But,' the voice told him firmly, 'what if you regret it later?' Severus sighed mentally and knew that he had to agree.
He turned around to face Harry, to tell him to stop and go back to his dorm when their eyes met. The green-eyed wizard faltered for a moment before he reached forward and framed Severus' face in both of his hands. Severus, however, did not seem to be in control of his limbs as Harry brought their lips together gently. Harry's hands ran through Severus' newly washed hair and then settled at his neck, pulling the older man closer to him.
Harry's tongue teased the corners of Severus' mouth, urging the latter's mouth open. The young man took Severus' lower lip into his mouth and sucked lightly. Severus moaned, opening his mouth to allow Harry's tongue. 'My, he's a damn good kisser.' Suddenly Severus found himself lying on his back; legs stretched out on the couch and Harry straddling his slim hips, their tongues engaged in an erotic dance. Severus wrapped his arms around Harry, gasping into Harry's mouth as their erections brushed against each other.
Harry released Severus' lips and proceeded to lightly lick and nip the older man's jaw. Severus groaned, throwing his head back and letting Harry gain access to the pale, delicate neck. Harry undid the buttons with his teeth and kissed the pale skin, almost nuzzling it. He seemed to have a map of all the pleasure spots on Severus' neck and making full use of it; driving the man crazy with his little bites and kisses.
Severus' hands moved down from Harry's back to his arse, kneading it with his hands and pressing their erections together, evoking a low hiss from the young man. Harry bit into Severus' neck, drawing blood and then quickly apologizing with his tongue. 'For someone who has not done this before, Harry is doing a great job,' Severus thought. His eyes, which were closed initially, opened quickly and stared hard at Harry. 'Harry…never done this before…oh Merlin…' "No!" Harry looked up at him concerned. "Something wrong?" he asked, almost purring.
"Yes, there is. Do you realize that what we are doing now is wrong?" Severus replied, still staring at him, mildly pleased that he managed a stern voice. Harry was now smiling enigmatically. The older man was the very picture of one who is debauched with his slightly mussed up hair, flushed face and well-kissed lips. Harry decided that this look suited Severus very well indeed. "What? This?" Harry questioned, his hand squeezing Severus' erection through the many layers of cloth. His smile widened as his action elicited a throaty moan from the latter.
Looking up at the young man, Severus answered, "Yes. Don't you realize that you are still my student and I'm still your professor?" Harry frowned a little. "Of course I know that. But the point is, there is no rule against a relationship between a professor and his student." Harry stretched forward and tucked a loose lock of hair behind Severus' ear, stroking his prominent cheekbones absently. The older man sighed and leaned into Harry's touch unconsciously.
"Would you feel good if Hogwarts have a new rule just because of the two of us?" Harry thought for a moment before responding. "But Severus, no one would find out if we keep it to ourselves, right?" Looking somewhat exasperated, Severus replied, "Fine then, if you say that, but what about the age difference between us?"
Harry rolled his eyes. "In case you've forgotten, Severus, we're wizards. We live much longer than muggles so that age difference you are talking about is only about six to seven years. Even in the muggle world, it's pretty normal to see couples with a few years between their ages. So what's the big deal?" Severus pushed himself up from his position on the couch, a determined look on his face. It was as though the man was trying to regain his lost dignity.
Fathomless black staring deep into emerald green, Severus said, "Harry, what would Black and your friends think if we did get together?" Almost without thinking, Harry said, "Well, they can go and screw themselves. Honestly I don't give a damn about what they think." Severus looked faintly surprised. "Are you sure? All that for just plain, old greasy me?" Harry grinned. "Yep. All that for you." Harry fingered a few strands of the long black hair. "Contrary to popular belief, you're not that greasy after all."
"Glad you realized that," Severus commented dryly. All of a sudden, Harry wrapped his arms around Severus' neck and kissed the hickey on his neck, mumbling huskily, "Are we ready to continue now?" Severus blinked. Although he had accepted that he was most probably gay, he wasn't ready to go so far yet. He placed both long-fingered hands on Harry's shoulders and held him at arms' length. "Harry, don't you think we should take it slowly?"
Harry sighed. "Alright, I suppose that we still have lots of time." He rested his head against Severus' shoulder. "So no shagging then?" Severus nodded. "At least until you're about to graduate." Harry let out a breath and lifted his head to look at his…lover? Hmm…not yet. What about his boyfriend? Harry snorted mentally; he couldn't imagine calling Severus his boyfriend. He finally settled on calling him his Sev. "What about snogging?"
If Severus could ever look mischievous or cheeky, that would be the exact emotion he was showing. "Come on Sev! Don't tell me that we have to wait till graduation to snog!" Harry whined. Severus grinned at him, showing a set of uneven but surprisingly, rather clean teeth; a vast difference from what Harry remembered. The very much articulate eyebrow quirked as Severus voiced his question. "Why are you calling me Sev all of a sudden?"
Harry pretended to pull his hair out. "Sev! Would you please answer my question first?!" The man in question laughed. It was a real laugh this time; not one that was mocking and it made the man human. "Why," Severus questioned, speaking in a deliberately slow voice, "are you so impatient?" Seeing the peeved look on Harry face, Severus felt the corners of his mouth twitch. To hell with all rules was what Severus thought as he pulled Harry close to him and kissed him deeply.
The young man panted slightly as they broke apart. "Well, I take that as a yes then." Severus was wearing his best poker face now. Then he smirked and said, "What do you think?" Harry rolled his eyes. "By the way, now that I answered your question, how about you giving me a reply?" Harry grinned at Severus. "Hmm…I don't think you would take kindly to being called Sev by a student right?"
"So what makes you think that you can call me Sev now?" Harry tried his best lost puppy look on Severus. "Based on the fact that we were kissing just a few moments ago?" The young man offered. Severus cocked his head and pretended to consider what Harry just said. "Alright then." he said, tweaking Harry's nose. "Ah yes, do get off my legs, I was planning to stalk through the halls like the overgrown bat I am."
Harry laughed and then stood up, waiting for Severus to settle down on the couch before snuggling up next to the Potions Master. Harry put his head on Severus' chest and stared into the fire, a silly grin on his face. Severus either did not notice it or perhaps he simply chose to ignore him. For a long time, the only sound in the room was the crackling of the fire; the two men simply sat together and enjoyed each other's company.
Severus found himself closing his eyes and almost drifting off when Harry's voice cut in hesitantly, as though he was afraid to disrupt the silence. "Sev?" Without opening his eyes, Severus made an unintelligible sound to show that he was listening. "Er…it's nothing. Forget about it."
The man rolled his eyes mentally. He opened his eyes and then lifted Harry's chin gently so that he could look into those unusually green eyes. "What is it, Harry? It's not like you gallant Gryffindors to chicken out halfway." He got a stuck-out tongue for a reply. "I wasn't chickening out; I thought you wanted to sleep." Came the indignant reply. Severus smirked; infuriating those oh-so-smart Gryffindors was the best way to get a reply out of them.
"Oh really? So tell me what you wanted to say." The Potions Master said, raising his eyebrow. Harry wrinkled his nose at Severus and resoluted not to let Severus tease him. "I was about to uh…ask you to tell me something about yourself." The ghost of a smile flitted across Severus' lips and surprisingly, remained. "Oh that…I was speculating what was the question you wanted to ask that made you so nervous."
Harry turned his nose up haughtily. "Whoever said that I was nervous?" Severus looked at Harry, an amused smile curling his lips. "Fine fine, whatever you say. So…what do you want to know?" Harry pondered for a moment, tilted his head to the side before saying, "Just tell me anything that I don't know about." Severus' eyes narrowed a little. "Really? I think if I was to do that, you'll be here till Christmas."
Harry rolled his eyes. "Quit stalling and just tell me already!" Tutting and shaking his head, Severus said, "Patience, Mr Potter, is a virtue that you should learn." Harry clapped his hand to his forehead and looked up at the ceiling. "Man, he's back in teacher's-mode again." Severus chuckled and then turned serious. "Are you sure you want to hear it? You will probably hate me after you found out what I did."
Harry shook his head before resting his head against the curve between Severus' neck and shoulder. "Just tell me about it and then we'll see if you fall under the category of someone that I should hate, okay?" A pale, slender arm snaked around Harry's shoulders and stroked the dark untamable hair. "You sure?" Harry scooted closer to Severus and stated matter-of-factly, "I'm not one who judge people by their past, Sev."
Severus was stuck by how easily Harry 'read' his mind again. Sucking in a breath and staring into space, Severus began. "My mother, Savannah, gave birth to me in our manor. Shortly after, my father, Nathaniel, named me Severus Emmanuel Snape. Since I was the only child of two high-ranking Death Eaters, I was supposed to be one too. Therefore, Father started training me when I was seven, after he got me a wand."
"You had a wand when you were seven?" asked Harry, somewhat incredulous. Severus nodded. "There are shops in Knockturn Alley that sells wands. I believe many of those shops are still in existence." Harry bobbed his head once and stored this piece of information in his mind; he realized that if he was to duel with Voldemort again (which is extremely likely), Priori Incantatem would probably take place. Severus had started to speak once more and Harry quickly turned his attention back to him.
"By the time I was nine, I was already learning how to cast the Unforgivables. Nathaniel would beat me up if I couldn't cast it properly. Savannah did not find out about what he did since she never took the time to care for me." Severus was now talking in a detached manner, as though he was an onlooker, not the one who was currently speaking. Even the hand on Harry's shoulder had stilled.
"I came to Hogwarts and the minute I graduated, Nathaniel brought me to Voldemort to be initiated. Apparently, Voldemort thought that I was useful to him in more ways than one; I was also his personal fuck-toy." Pause. "For quite some time, I hungered for the power he gave me and I rose through the ranks quickly. Right into the Inner Circle. When I turned twenty, for reasons that I would rather not tell you, I went to Albus and I tried to persuade him to snap my wand and send me to Azkaban. But he refused and told me to spy for him. I would, too, get the Potions instructor job so that I could report to him."
"Then you defeated Voldemort and both of my parents were killed. I would be bluffing you if I said that I wasn't…in one way or another, glad." Harry was still gaping at the man. How could someone be willing to go to Azkaban? Severus didn't notice Harry's staring; he was staring at a spot just above the enchanted mantel clock. The older man was about to continue when Harry cut in and finished for him.
"Then Tom bloody Riddle came back again and you had be a spy once more. But that was 'til I blown your cover right?" Severus nodded mutely. "Are you disgusted by me now?" he asked, removing his arm from Harry's shoulder. "I'm sure you are. I trust that you know where the door is." Although Severus had obviously tried to mask his emotions, Harry could easily detect an underlying note of bitterness.
Harry put his arms around Severus' torso and inhaled his minty scent, astonishing the latter. "No, Sev I don't hate you at all." Harry looked into those obsidian eyes and said truthfully, "There wasn't anything you could do about it. So forget about the past, okay? You got me to disrupt your peaceful life now." Leaning up, Harry pressed his lips to Severus' in a chaste kiss. Pulling away, Harry smiled and whispered, "Love you."
Severus' jaw dropped and for a several moments, all he could do was to gawk at Harry. The Gryffindor laughed and tapped his chin, causing the man to close it abruptly. "I…er…" Harry chuckled and shook his head lightly, placing two fingers on Severus' lips. "You don't have to say anything you know?" Severus pulled Harry into his arms and uttered a single word in that dark, silky baritone of his. "Thanks."
The boy grinned and didn't reply; he knew that Severus did not need one. Harry closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. Severus smelled of mint and the young man could detect a faint whiff of vanilla. It was a unique combination and Harry found that he liked it very much. Suddenly, an idea came to him. "Sev?" Turning around to look at him, Severus asked, "Yes, Harry?"
Harry sat up and his face took on a particularly cheeky look. Tracing a finger down Severus' cheek and leaning closer to the man, Harry said, "Let's go to your room." Severus jerked back and stared at the young man, alarmed. Was that an innocent question or really an innuendo? Harry rose an eyebrow like how he saw Severus did, the corners of his mouth twitching.
Harry stood up and held out his hand to Severus. When the man did not accept it, Harry grabbed his left hand and dragged the man into his room. "Harry!" The said young man's laughter followed them all the way into Severus' room.
~*~*~*~ (this is going to be really sappy…)
Harry opened his eyes and blinked sleepily. It was fortunate that he did not have any nightmares the previous night. He took in his surroundings as his mind struggled to register where he was at currently. This place was missing the familiar red drapes around his bed and was also void of Neville's usual snoring. He finally realized where he was when he spotted the dark-haired wizard lying next to him.
He smiled as he recalled how he dragged Severus to bed after talking, shoes, robes and all. Or rather, slippers, robes and all in Severus' case. Speaking of Severus…Harry stared at the man who was sleeping ever so peacefully. It stuck Harry that he had never seen the man so relaxed or at ease before. 'One would even say that he looks human,' Harry mused, grinning.
The sallow skin seemed ivory white in the morning light, forming a perfect contrast against the shiny black hair (he just washed his hair) that barely brushed Severus' shoulders. Harry traced a finger across the lines on Severus' forehead and then down to the aquiline nose. Severus opened his eyes slowly, stretching as he did so.
Black eyes that had not focussed turned to Harry's direction and blinked at him. Severus smiled lethargically at Harry and said, "Morning." Harry felt himself melt. He wondered what kind of control the other man had over him to make him feel that way. A voice that was roughened by sleep cut into his thoughts. "You better go back to your dorm. I have no doubts that your friends are looking for you."
Harry sighed and put his head on Severus' shoulder. "It's Saturday, Sev. They're still asleep." Severus considered for a moment. "Fine then, but you have to go back by 8.30, clear?" The young man smiled and closed his eyes. "Yes sir." Looking at the boy beside him, Severus hesitated for a moment before putting his arms around Harry and pulling him close. He smiled when Harry snuggled into his arms. He then fell asleep listening to Harry's even breathing.
~*~*~*~
Author's Note: Really long chapter this time. Spend the most time on it as well. Sorry if you find that quite a few words are repeated 'cause I could only do this in the free time I have and they are really spaced out. I'm not really satisfied with this chapter so do leave me comments or constructive criticism so I can improve on this. Thanks for reading!