Chapter 3: I Wish I Never Saw The Sunshine
Title: Her Presence Still Felt
Summary: Months after her death Angel can still feel Buffy B/A
Disclaimer: Buffy, Angel etc are not mine, don't own any of them. If I did Buffy and Angel would still be together. P.S. Joss is evil!!!!!
Author's Note: This is going to be the last chapter for a while. I am going away for three weeks and won't have access to a computer or the net. Sorry. Have a Merry Christmas.
Previously Cordy's eyes followed them up the stairs until they were out of sight. What was that? Cordy, Willow everyone had assumed Buffy had been held in a hell dimension. What if she'd been in Heaven?
All the A.I. Team were gathered downstairs in the hotel foyer. Minus one Angel. Angel had been upstairs with Buffy now going on to four hours. Everyone was concerned. Most of all Cordelia but for a truly different reason. "They should have been down by now. Nothing takes this long to talk out, not even being brought back from the dead." Cordelia stated.
"Cordelia, they have been separated for a long time, one of them has just come back from hell. Surely you don't believe that a quick chat would cover what needs to be said between them?" Wesley queried her.
"They did look kinda into each other. I know I heard the story of the Angel and Buffy saga but someone forgot to mention the chemistry between those two. Man! Do they sizzle or what!" Gunn ranted.
"I didn't even need a hum from either of those two to get a reading. When they touched, I virtually had to cover my eyes. Please tell me again why those two are not together because they complete each other so perfectly. Buffy fills a hole in Angel's soul that's been there since I met him. It was filled as soon as she was in the room." Lorne exclaimed.
They were all so worried about Angel that they didn't see that he had walked up behind them. "Guys. Guys!" Angel yelled. They all stopped and turned to look at him. Then started firing a million questions at him. "Stop!" he ordered. "Buffy has been through a lot. She came to see me to let me know she was back and she'll be leaving again in the morning. No she won't be staying with me," he said looking directly at Cordelia who already had her mouth open to complain." I have given her the room next to mine and I would appreciate it if everyone didn't rush to meet her. She is resting now and I don't want her disturbed. Ok?! Ok." Angel finished and ran his hands through his hair.
"I want to see her. She was my friend too you know, well kinda. You don't get a monopoly on her just because she's your ex." Cordelia spoke up.
"Yes I would greatly like to see how she is. She was my charge at one stage and I still feel a certain kind of responsibility towards her." Wesley added.
"Okay you can see her in a little while. One at a time! Okay?" Angel relented just in time to see Cordelia already on her way up the stairs. "Cordelia! Cordy!!" Angel yelled after her. "Be gentle!" he yelled "Please." He whispered after she had left his sight.
/I wish I never saw the sunshine I wish I never saw the sunshine I wish I never saw the sun shining/
"You're lying."
Buffy turned around to find a half concerned, half furious Cordelia. "What.. what are you talking about? Who am I lying to Cordelia?"
"To him, to everyone. You weren't in hell. You were in Heaven." Cordelia half yelled. "What are you talking about?! Of course I was in Hell! How dare you accuse me of .."
"Doing exactly what you are doing?" Cordelia cut Buffy off. "I saw you Buffy, I saw you in a place where you were happy and safe and loved. That certainly wasn't hell." Buffy gave up and sat on the edge of the bed, a defeated look on her face.
"What was I supposed to do Cordelia? Huh?! Say gee thanks guys for bringing me back from the dead. And Oh by the way I wasn't in hell being eternally tormented, I was in heaven and deliriously happy and you ripped me away from that? Should I have told them that Cordy? Should I have told Dawn that I miss it, that I wish I was there again. Do you think that was the right thing to say to my fifteen year old sister? Well? Tell me what you would have done in my place, Miss Seer." Buffy demanded an answer. "Would you have broken all their hearts and made them feel guilty for the rest of their lives? Well?"
Cordy spluttered and didn't answer. "I . "
/ I wish I never saw the sunshine I wish I never saw the sunshine And if I never saw the sunshine baby Then maybe I wouldn't mind the rain/
"I was happy Cordy, before they pulled me out. I was safe, no more violence, no more fear, no more pain. I was loved and cherished, my Mother was there and no one would ever leave me. And suddenly I was alive again. I was in my coffin not able to breathe 'cause all the air had long left. I had to claw my way out of my grave and into a world where everything was so violent and loud and painful. I thought I was in hell." Buffy paused and looked up at Cordelia who was standing there staring at her in shock. "You know one of the first things I did when I got out of my grave? I went back to the tower, I was going to jump again and go back. It was the only way I thought to make the pain end. Dawn was there though, she stopped me. barely." Buffy paused "You can't tell anyone this Cordelia. They can't know. None of them can ever be told. It would just make things a lot worse. Please! Don't tell anyone, not even Angel."
Cordelia wiped silent tears of her cheeks, nodded once and hugged Buffy for al she was worth. If no one else could be told she was as sure as hell not going to let Buffy go through this alone.
/I wish I never saw the sunshine And if I never saw the sun shining Then maybe I wouldn't mind the rain Oh be in all this pain I wouldn't mind the rain/
Title: Her Presence Still Felt
Summary: Months after her death Angel can still feel Buffy B/A
Disclaimer: Buffy, Angel etc are not mine, don't own any of them. If I did Buffy and Angel would still be together. P.S. Joss is evil!!!!!
Author's Note: This is going to be the last chapter for a while. I am going away for three weeks and won't have access to a computer or the net. Sorry. Have a Merry Christmas.
Previously Cordy's eyes followed them up the stairs until they were out of sight. What was that? Cordy, Willow everyone had assumed Buffy had been held in a hell dimension. What if she'd been in Heaven?
All the A.I. Team were gathered downstairs in the hotel foyer. Minus one Angel. Angel had been upstairs with Buffy now going on to four hours. Everyone was concerned. Most of all Cordelia but for a truly different reason. "They should have been down by now. Nothing takes this long to talk out, not even being brought back from the dead." Cordelia stated.
"Cordelia, they have been separated for a long time, one of them has just come back from hell. Surely you don't believe that a quick chat would cover what needs to be said between them?" Wesley queried her.
"They did look kinda into each other. I know I heard the story of the Angel and Buffy saga but someone forgot to mention the chemistry between those two. Man! Do they sizzle or what!" Gunn ranted.
"I didn't even need a hum from either of those two to get a reading. When they touched, I virtually had to cover my eyes. Please tell me again why those two are not together because they complete each other so perfectly. Buffy fills a hole in Angel's soul that's been there since I met him. It was filled as soon as she was in the room." Lorne exclaimed.
They were all so worried about Angel that they didn't see that he had walked up behind them. "Guys. Guys!" Angel yelled. They all stopped and turned to look at him. Then started firing a million questions at him. "Stop!" he ordered. "Buffy has been through a lot. She came to see me to let me know she was back and she'll be leaving again in the morning. No she won't be staying with me," he said looking directly at Cordelia who already had her mouth open to complain." I have given her the room next to mine and I would appreciate it if everyone didn't rush to meet her. She is resting now and I don't want her disturbed. Ok?! Ok." Angel finished and ran his hands through his hair.
"I want to see her. She was my friend too you know, well kinda. You don't get a monopoly on her just because she's your ex." Cordelia spoke up.
"Yes I would greatly like to see how she is. She was my charge at one stage and I still feel a certain kind of responsibility towards her." Wesley added.
"Okay you can see her in a little while. One at a time! Okay?" Angel relented just in time to see Cordelia already on her way up the stairs. "Cordelia! Cordy!!" Angel yelled after her. "Be gentle!" he yelled "Please." He whispered after she had left his sight.
/I wish I never saw the sunshine I wish I never saw the sunshine I wish I never saw the sun shining/
"You're lying."
Buffy turned around to find a half concerned, half furious Cordelia. "What.. what are you talking about? Who am I lying to Cordelia?"
"To him, to everyone. You weren't in hell. You were in Heaven." Cordelia half yelled. "What are you talking about?! Of course I was in Hell! How dare you accuse me of .."
"Doing exactly what you are doing?" Cordelia cut Buffy off. "I saw you Buffy, I saw you in a place where you were happy and safe and loved. That certainly wasn't hell." Buffy gave up and sat on the edge of the bed, a defeated look on her face.
"What was I supposed to do Cordelia? Huh?! Say gee thanks guys for bringing me back from the dead. And Oh by the way I wasn't in hell being eternally tormented, I was in heaven and deliriously happy and you ripped me away from that? Should I have told them that Cordy? Should I have told Dawn that I miss it, that I wish I was there again. Do you think that was the right thing to say to my fifteen year old sister? Well? Tell me what you would have done in my place, Miss Seer." Buffy demanded an answer. "Would you have broken all their hearts and made them feel guilty for the rest of their lives? Well?"
Cordy spluttered and didn't answer. "I . "
/ I wish I never saw the sunshine I wish I never saw the sunshine And if I never saw the sunshine baby Then maybe I wouldn't mind the rain/
"I was happy Cordy, before they pulled me out. I was safe, no more violence, no more fear, no more pain. I was loved and cherished, my Mother was there and no one would ever leave me. And suddenly I was alive again. I was in my coffin not able to breathe 'cause all the air had long left. I had to claw my way out of my grave and into a world where everything was so violent and loud and painful. I thought I was in hell." Buffy paused and looked up at Cordelia who was standing there staring at her in shock. "You know one of the first things I did when I got out of my grave? I went back to the tower, I was going to jump again and go back. It was the only way I thought to make the pain end. Dawn was there though, she stopped me. barely." Buffy paused "You can't tell anyone this Cordelia. They can't know. None of them can ever be told. It would just make things a lot worse. Please! Don't tell anyone, not even Angel."
Cordelia wiped silent tears of her cheeks, nodded once and hugged Buffy for al she was worth. If no one else could be told she was as sure as hell not going to let Buffy go through this alone.
/I wish I never saw the sunshine And if I never saw the sun shining Then maybe I wouldn't mind the rain Oh be in all this pain I wouldn't mind the rain/