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Once again, I have a chapter for all of you readers to enjoy:

Liz's POV

"Psst, Elrond" I whispered. He was walking in one of his orchards, but he stopped when we started calling him; which happened to be five minutes ago. He was still looking around, trying to find the source of the noises. He was really stupid! "Elrond!" I heard Jen announce loudly, losing her patience. He turned around to find Jen and I, staring at him with puppy-dog eyes. "Get us some clothes. Pretty please with cherries on top?" He seemed confused, obviously showing no relation to the modern phrase. "If you wish for some skirts and dresses, the seamstress would be happy to accommodate you ladies."

"We don't want 'dresses'. We want what, um, Aragorn is wearing. Sort of, but not really," I responded, hoping to win this argument that hasn't begun. "You wish to see the haberdasher?" Elrond's confusion rising. I was at a loss. "Yes, if you'd please show us the way," Jen put in. "But a lady is to be dressed in lady's attire." Jen sighed, "We are going on a quest. We do not wish to be trudging in the mud with dresses."

"I do not wish quarrel, but you ladies should wear-"

"Are you going to give us clothes or not?" Jen asked angrily. "Yes, but-"

"Thank you!" we called, already 50 feet away from him. "But, but. . ." Elrond continued, trying to win the squabble; although deciding against it and continuing his stroll.

~ * * * * * * * ~

"That didn't work. What now, genius?" I asked Jen. "Well, I hoped it wouldn't come to this, but…" she trailed off looking for the quarters of the soon to be heroes of Middle-Earth. She saw Merry exit one of the rooms and whispered, "Okay, all we need to do is get some clothes from one of these guys."

"Isn't that stealing? And besides, hobbit clothes won't fit!" I answered, a bit confused. "No, we find clothes from someone taller, like Boromir. And we're not 'stealing', we're borrowing without asking. If it so happens that we fail to return them, it not on purpose. Plus, Elrond said that we could have clothes," she explained. She began randomly picking a room, hoping it would not be a hobbit's or Aragorn's {Again with the hygiene =_=}. Jen opened the door a bit to peek in and conclude that the coast was clear. She motioned to me and began rummaging through the dresser. "Oh my God! They actually have underwear in Middle-Earth!" Jen exclaimed, holding up a pair of boxers-like clothing. "Of course! What do you think they wore?"


"Nothing. I though they went around in commando, or something."

I sighed and continued to find something that might fit. We finally found some clothes that might actually fit. "Now all we need are boots," I heard Jen mutter to herself while fumbling through what looked like a closet. "Aha!" she cried in triumph, scaring the heck out of me. She was holding up two pairs of boots. "They don't fit," said after trying them on. "We'll worry about that later," she responded, rolling the bundle of cloth around the boots, trying to conceal them. "Why don't we wear the clothes and stuff we're wearing now?" I dared to ask. "Pumps and flip-flops aren't made for walking and hiking. And we don't want to attract attention to ourselves."

"Uh huh." Thinking she may be getting to caught up in this. "Come on, before whoever resides in this room returns," she said, placing the bundle under her arm. We exited the room and ran to hide the bundles in our own lodging. After I left the package of garments in my room, I bumped straight into Gandalf. "Here you two are! I've been looking everywhere for you two. The dinner is about to start. Where were you?"

"Um. . .ah, we were-"

"Taking a nap," Jen explained. "Yeah," I put in nervously, "we were taking a nap. No theft involved at all! No sir."

Jen closed her eyes and placed a hand over her face while Gandalf raised a questioning eyebrow at us. "Well, hurry up. The dinner is about to begin." He said as he walked away. "Real smooth, slick," Jen exclaimed sarcastically, elbowing me. We hurried to the dining hall to find everyone waiting to be served.

"You sit next to Gimli."

"No, you sit next to Gimli."

This whispered argument continued until the food was served, then Jen sat next to Gimli (Legolas looked like he was smirking at the fact that no one wanted to sit next to the dwarf [he was still hot *sigh*]) and I sat next Gandalf.

Jen's POV {this is only temporary, but I though it would be funnier if this piece was in Jen's POV}

Great. I had to sit next to Mr. Helmet Hair. And it smells like he hasn't bathed in two months.

"What issue brings such a fair maiden to Rivendell? Certainly not the One Ring can bring a beautiful angel down from Heaven above," Gimli whispered in my ear. I felt a hand on my knee, and it sure as heck wasn't mine. I took my water glass and dumped the entire thing onto his head. He looked like a wet mongoose. I heard some of the Elves snicker, but the rest just stared, puzzled at the scene before them.


"Feisty. Me likes feisty women," Gimli responded. Ugh. "Switch seats?" I asked Liz with a pleading gaze. "Fine," came the exasperated reply.

Liz's POV

"May I sit there?" Gimli asked. Since when has this become Musical Chairs? "Fine." I was getting tired of this. Miscellaneous Elf #2 now sat to my right. "I know what it's like to not be loved," he said. What was he taking about? "I know what it's like to be loved. I have a soul mate," I replied. "Really? Who?" he asked, seemingly disappointed. "Legolas," I answered with a dreamy tone. Legolas began choking violently on whatever he was eating (probably overjoyed that I share the same feelings). Glorfindel, who had been sitting next to him, starting pounding on his back. "He must have caught sight of such a lovely lady," I heard Gimli say to Jen. Now Jen was choking. Now two people were choking and havoc was spreading. Jen recovered faster, and began sputtering, "What? But who. . . And I. . ." She was obviously confused that the dwarf managed to sit next to her again. "That's it, I'm full!" she said as she stormed off to her quarters. I was torn between two people: my love, Legolas (don't think anything else =_=); and my friend, Jen. Well, Legolas was sprawled on the table, unconscious with color returning to his *cough*beautiful*cough* face. I decided to bring some more food to her, since she left with eating hardly anything.

I knocked on the door. It cracked a bit, but opened all the way when Jen saw that it wasn't the dwarf. "Hi, is the dwarf following?" she asked. "I don't think so."

"What's that?" she asked pointing to the folded napkin in my hand. "Food," I answered simply. "Good, 'cause I'm starving." I handed her the food as she let me in. She sat at the small desks in her room. "So what are we going to do tomorrow? Do we follow the Fellowship or what?"

"Nah, that'd be a waste of energy," she said, but was interrupted by a knock at the door. She opened the door. "Greetings, my lov-" was all that came out before she slammed the door on his face. "Go away, you freaky little gnome!!" she yelled. "But, love, I know you must feel the same way, for a dwarf as handsome as myself-"

"Ha!" she said, interrupting him, "not if you where the last creature in Middle Earth, now leave alone before I call one of the guards!"

"Not to worry, love, for you will accept your love for me in due time," he replied, he voice disappearing along with his footsteps. "Looks like you've got an admirer," I noted from the corner of the room, a smirk on my face. "At least I don't go around chasing Elves," she retorted. "We're soul mates. Soul mates!"

"Whatever you say. . ." she said, beginning to eat again. "So, what are we gonna do tomorrow?"

"Um, I think we should go straight to the mines of Moria. We should avoid contact with the Fellowship as much as possible, because it might affect the future."


"Yeah, yeah. Quantum physics. But how am I to marry Legolas if we aren't allowed to have social contact!" I whined. "Hello? Legolas is a prince. I'm sure he has tons of fans at home, and a betrothed that was arranged 1,000 years before he was born!"

"But we're soul mates! Fate must allow each other to be together forever."

"Yeah, okay, but until that day, we must not tamper with the delicate quantum strings that hold the future in place. The entire Middle-Earth depends on us. And the Fellowship, that's why they're going on the quest in the first place; but they don't count much."

"Then why are we going anyway?" I asked. Jen began choking for the second time that night. "You were the one who suggested this in the first place! To help the Fellowship out! To clear the way for them! To make sure that they chuck the ring into lava and save the world! I didn't read the rest of the books, but all I know is that evil fails and good prevails. We're just going make sure that good prevails faster."

* * * * * * *

Little did the girls know that "helping the Fellowship" caused the fail of good and Sauron prevailed. Everyone then was enslaved and lived poor, miserable lives forever.

~Just kidding.

Okay, if you're wondering why I continue to claim that Elrond is sooo stupid, it's a little joke I amuse myself with whenever I watch the movie. When talking to Gandalf in Rivendell, he states that he was there on that fateful day when the ring was cut off from its master. "It should have ended that day" when the ring failed to be destroyed. I wouldn't have let Isildur just walk away with the ring. Nooo. I'd kill the arrogant little human and shove both him and the ring into the fiery depths. But that's just me.

As always, please review. Thanks!