A/N--This story is more angst then I thought it would have..hmmm, I'm
already thinking about a sequel to this when i'm not even done with it
yet. Enjoy the chapter ^.^
**** ....****--the song is in between
( ) ( )
(^.^)
She pushed Sesshoumaru away, she knew she did. Somehow, it left her feeling
empty. Right now, she was standing in front of her window, staring outside.
the rain had let up for a little bit, but darkly filled clouds were fastly
approaching, promising another drenched night. They were leaving as soon
as the rain let up.
As Kagome stared out into the cloudy sky her thoughts turned to the night
Inuyasha left her.
***Flashback***
She woke up calm, and happy like usual. When she felt something was wrong
in the pit of her stomach. She looked aorund, and didn't notice anything out
of the usual. She looked towards the door, and got out of her sleeping bag.
She stood up, and walked over to door, hearing voices mumbled together
she slowly opened the door, and peeked into the other room. Her eyes widened
when she noticed who it was. Inuyasha and Kikyo were there whispering to
each other in the dark.
"What are you doing here Kikyo?"
"I came to see you.."
"What else?" He said gruffly
"Let's go look for the shards together" Her eyes pleading
"I.....Kagome and I are looking for them together."
"Forget her, she's just my reincarnate I can protect myself, help in killing demons,
and still find the shards just like her.."
Just then Inuyasha seemed to go into deep thought as Kikyo watched him eagerly,
Kagome's heart sank as she quietly awaited his next words. Tension amounting
quickly within the room. He looked back up at Kikyo, and Kagome's world as she
knew it shattered into a million pieces with just 3 words.
"Fine i'll go"
****Are you aware of what you make me feel, baby
Right now I feel invisible to you, like I'm not real
Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you
Why'd you turn away?
Here's what I have to say I was left to cry there,
waiting outside there grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided****
"Then let's go.."
"Tonight?"
"Yes we can start right now and Kagome won't know that your gone untill the morning or
afternoon.."
****Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
You, you need to listen I'm starting to trip,
I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone
Am I just some chick you place beside you to take somebody's place
when you turn around can you recognize my face you used to love me,
you used to hug me
But that wasn't the case
Everything wasn't ok I was left to cry there
waiting outside there grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
You, you need to listen I'm starting to trip,
I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone****
Kagome watched as they walked out of the house together, just then Kikyo
looked back at her, and smiled like she won the war already. Kagome's heart
filled with anger, as she watched Inuyasha walk out of her life, leaving
her broken heart smashed on the ground. Two rouge tears fell down her
face, before Kagome's heart filled with hate, anger and revenge, on Kikyo.
****Crying out loud I'm crying out loud
Crying out loud I'm crying out loud
Open your eyes
Open up wide
Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there
when I was scared I was so alone Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
Why should I care
If you don't care then I don't care were not going anywhere
Why should I care cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
Why should I care If you don't care then i don't care were not going anywhere*
***End flashback***
Kagome was filled with anger once again, as she thought about what Inuyasha
had done,she almost felt sorry for him. He's so dense, and clueless, and he's
loyal to one forever. Poor boy doesn't realize that his death is coming up so soon.
With this she decided to leave today. She was tired of giving him one more day
to live. He didn't deserve to live any longer. She walked to the door after she
dressed, and opened it. She walked down the halls untill she reached the front
door. She stopped in front of it, when the thought of Shippo crossed her mind.
'what am I going to do about Shippo,will Sesshoumaru take care of him? he
takes care of Rin so he would take of Shippo.
After killing Inuyasha i'll bring the Tetsusaiga back to him for watching
Shippo.' With that decided she reached up to move the door aside, just as her
fingertips touched the door a thought crossed her mind. 'Was she running?
like Inuyasha,' her eyes showed her disgust at such a though. Her hand fell
back to her side. ' Maybe..Sesshoumaru is diffrent then Inuyasha? maybe he'll
actually love me.' Her eyes closed, as she remembered what his feather light
touch and hot kisses had done to her. She never felt that way with Inuyasha,
but then again he never kissed her and he never touched her with the need that
Sesshoumaru touched her with. She stepped back from the door, and ran
down the halls letting her nose guide her too Sesshoumaru.
He felt like crying, imagine...being refused by the one women or man that
had captured your heart unknowingly. You giving it to them willingly, even
if it hurt your very being, but you did it because you wanted them that badly.
Then pushing your sacrifice away like it was poisened food,not to be touched.
It doesn't sound painful, but it's the worst pain you can feel, worse then being
stabbed a million times in the heart. But it's close, because that's exactly what
it was. Being stabbed in the heart emotionally, instead of physically. If I were
to choose one over the other, i'd choose to be stabbed pysically. At least then,
i'd know how to get rid of the pain. Maybe now you understand how I feel,
at least a little.
If he didn't have so much responsiblity, he would have probably killed
himself. He couldn't believe that he had fallen in love, just to be rejected.
He couldn't blame her though, no he could never blame her. He loved her
too much. At least now, he understood half the pain that she felt, feels. She
had been forgotten in the shadows, while Inuyasha chose another over her.
At least he knew that she didn't run to someone else, to get away from him.
But still, knowing that she didn't want him, hurt a hell lot more then most
would . He had basically given up life. A stupid youkai
could come into his home, and try to murder him, he wouldn't even try to
stop it. If it weren't for Rin. Rin unknowingly held him to this plain of
existence, just because he had to protect her.
He was currently in his Library feeling sorry for his cursed life, and
watching Jakken mumble about stupid things. When he felt something,
someone coming towards him quickly, he closed his eyes and felt the
familiar presence coming towards him, and stop at the door.
She stopped as soon as she reached the door to where he was. She believed
it was the library she wasn't sure. She just followed his scent here. As she
reached for the door, she suddenly got scared. ' What if he didn't like her
at all, and she was just imaginning things'. 'What if because she felt so
lonely that she was picturing things that truly weren't there'. 'What if she
was just picturing something bigger then it really was'. 'I mean a kiss is a
kiss it doesn't mean anything. He could have just been playing around with
her emotions'. She growled 'if he was then he's going to get payment back
in full with intrest'. She raised her hand, slide the door open, and
stepped back involuntarily. Sesshoumaru was standing right there with his
usual stoic face. She sighed, and looked at him.
"We need to talk"
Sesshoumaru nodded and walked back into the room, Kagome following.
She watched amused, as Jaken stuttered his way out, and shut the door
behind him. She looked back at Sesshoumaru, to see him sitting in a chair,
and looking at her chillingly.
"Now, what did you want to talk about?"
Kagome's breath caught, as she was just about to apologize for coming, and leave
when she slapped herself mentally, for wanting to run away. She looked
down at the floor, finding her shoes a better place to look at, then his eyes.
"Us" she answered softly
"What us?" he answered more harshly then intended. She winced, and knew
that she deserved this. She closed her eyes and let herself relax, this was harder
in real life then it was in her head. She looked up into his determinedly.
"I want there to be an us, but if you don't want that then i'll leave, and I won't
bother you anymore"
He looked at her, suprise shown on his face slightly, until it turned into a cold
calculating glare. She closed her eyes and held back her tears, she bowed
respectfully, and turned around walking towards the door. It's a good thing
she already everything packed. She would be leaving tonight with Shippo.
She opened the door and walked out into the hall. Every fiber of her being
wishing he'd stop her, tell her something, anything except what he said
"So you'll be leaving tommorrow?"
Kagome's heart almost stopped,almost. She felt she had no tears to shed. She
shook her head slowly, and turned to look at Sesshoumaru one last time.
"No, i'm leaving tonight" with that, she shut the door behind her, and walked
away.
His mind fell down hill, as he wished his silent plea would reach Kagome.
'please, don't leave me..'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
( ) ( )
(~.~)
Lunakitty stands with hands behind her back and her head bowed.
"I swear this wasn't how I wanted it to be ~_~ when I began to write
this I was planning on making it totally diffrent . ya know she would get
bold, and walk over to him and they would start kissing like crazy then that
would lead to the bedroom and other things.~.~ But well when I got to that
point it I typed something totally diffrent from what I originally thought it
would be...So instead of hot steamy lemon stuff you got more angst... and
at this moment time I don't know if Sesshoumaru is going to stop her or
let her go...The bloody idiot has to much pride ~_~ anyways I know this
story has a lot more angst then what I intended and I know your all getting
sick of it, but I don't know they're all emotionally traumatized and there's
still going to be more angst"
Lunakitty screams"My mom just took my towel!!!!shit it was my favorite towel
. and if ANY of you flame me for this I swear to the gods I won't update 2
times a week, i'll make it more angsty,AND I'll make the chapter's shorter,
I'm on the edge here don't mess with me O.o"
Luna grins anways here are the reviews for the last chapter:
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Dark_Topaz-- He will heheh don't worry, I love torturing Inuyasha
Lyn/Lin ---Gomen nasai for making this chapter so angsty, one of my dear
faithful readers :D
rEbEcCa---Hehe i'm torturing you huh?
misori-chan---....Um right.. Thanks for reviewing !^.^'
ashleekyle---I wish I knew i think I enjoy torturig them though ~.~ I'm so
mean.
Talon DragonFriend---I SWEAR TO THE GODS I DIDN'T MEAN TO MAKE
THIS CHAPTER ANGSTY, IT JUST CAME OUT THAT WAY!!!
Tifa-sama---It wasn't her fault this time, She made on honest effort to be with
him but he didn't say anything but be a jerk. Hmmm and I don't recall saying
anything about Kagome changing back ^.~ it's in her head.
DemonBlade---Yeah it is huh? ~.~ I feel so sorry for them
Dark Star --- This sadness is making people cry huh? . It sure as hell makes
me want to cry and anyways everyone should know by now that i'm horrible
at grammer and I really don't care .
moonbay--The answers will come my dear, just pay attention closely
Xtreme Nuisance ---*Jumps around happily and does a victory dance* I have
another fan !!!Yay!!^.^
holly--Awesome!!Thanks for reviewing ^.^
littledarkbakura--Hello!!Knock knock!!Of course i'm going to keep writing
I'm loving the reviews and i already have a kinda rough draft for a sequel
though im not sure if im going to make a sequel or just a really long Epilouge
dark angel--*rubs her hands together and hunches over laughing evilly* Of
course she's a tease,she needs to make sure that he wants her.
Diana---Why thank you! glad you think the story's good but you can tell i'm
definitly getting better by the longer chapter's and it's a lot better in my head
then the first chapter.
Thanks to everyone else who reviewed and Have a Nice day!!
.~**~Lunakitty~**~.
already thinking about a sequel to this when i'm not even done with it
yet. Enjoy the chapter ^.^
**** ....****--the song is in between
( ) ( )
(^.^)
She pushed Sesshoumaru away, she knew she did. Somehow, it left her feeling
empty. Right now, she was standing in front of her window, staring outside.
the rain had let up for a little bit, but darkly filled clouds were fastly
approaching, promising another drenched night. They were leaving as soon
as the rain let up.
As Kagome stared out into the cloudy sky her thoughts turned to the night
Inuyasha left her.
***Flashback***
She woke up calm, and happy like usual. When she felt something was wrong
in the pit of her stomach. She looked aorund, and didn't notice anything out
of the usual. She looked towards the door, and got out of her sleeping bag.
She stood up, and walked over to door, hearing voices mumbled together
she slowly opened the door, and peeked into the other room. Her eyes widened
when she noticed who it was. Inuyasha and Kikyo were there whispering to
each other in the dark.
"What are you doing here Kikyo?"
"I came to see you.."
"What else?" He said gruffly
"Let's go look for the shards together" Her eyes pleading
"I.....Kagome and I are looking for them together."
"Forget her, she's just my reincarnate I can protect myself, help in killing demons,
and still find the shards just like her.."
Just then Inuyasha seemed to go into deep thought as Kikyo watched him eagerly,
Kagome's heart sank as she quietly awaited his next words. Tension amounting
quickly within the room. He looked back up at Kikyo, and Kagome's world as she
knew it shattered into a million pieces with just 3 words.
"Fine i'll go"
****Are you aware of what you make me feel, baby
Right now I feel invisible to you, like I'm not real
Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you
Why'd you turn away?
Here's what I have to say I was left to cry there,
waiting outside there grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided****
"Then let's go.."
"Tonight?"
"Yes we can start right now and Kagome won't know that your gone untill the morning or
afternoon.."
****Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
You, you need to listen I'm starting to trip,
I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone
Am I just some chick you place beside you to take somebody's place
when you turn around can you recognize my face you used to love me,
you used to hug me
But that wasn't the case
Everything wasn't ok I was left to cry there
waiting outside there grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
You, you need to listen I'm starting to trip,
I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone****
Kagome watched as they walked out of the house together, just then Kikyo
looked back at her, and smiled like she won the war already. Kagome's heart
filled with anger, as she watched Inuyasha walk out of her life, leaving
her broken heart smashed on the ground. Two rouge tears fell down her
face, before Kagome's heart filled with hate, anger and revenge, on Kikyo.
****Crying out loud I'm crying out loud
Crying out loud I'm crying out loud
Open your eyes
Open up wide
Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there
when I was scared I was so alone Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
Why should I care
If you don't care then I don't care were not going anywhere
Why should I care cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
Why should I care If you don't care then i don't care were not going anywhere*
***End flashback***
Kagome was filled with anger once again, as she thought about what Inuyasha
had done,she almost felt sorry for him. He's so dense, and clueless, and he's
loyal to one forever. Poor boy doesn't realize that his death is coming up so soon.
With this she decided to leave today. She was tired of giving him one more day
to live. He didn't deserve to live any longer. She walked to the door after she
dressed, and opened it. She walked down the halls untill she reached the front
door. She stopped in front of it, when the thought of Shippo crossed her mind.
'what am I going to do about Shippo,will Sesshoumaru take care of him? he
takes care of Rin so he would take of Shippo.
After killing Inuyasha i'll bring the Tetsusaiga back to him for watching
Shippo.' With that decided she reached up to move the door aside, just as her
fingertips touched the door a thought crossed her mind. 'Was she running?
like Inuyasha,' her eyes showed her disgust at such a though. Her hand fell
back to her side. ' Maybe..Sesshoumaru is diffrent then Inuyasha? maybe he'll
actually love me.' Her eyes closed, as she remembered what his feather light
touch and hot kisses had done to her. She never felt that way with Inuyasha,
but then again he never kissed her and he never touched her with the need that
Sesshoumaru touched her with. She stepped back from the door, and ran
down the halls letting her nose guide her too Sesshoumaru.
He felt like crying, imagine...being refused by the one women or man that
had captured your heart unknowingly. You giving it to them willingly, even
if it hurt your very being, but you did it because you wanted them that badly.
Then pushing your sacrifice away like it was poisened food,not to be touched.
It doesn't sound painful, but it's the worst pain you can feel, worse then being
stabbed a million times in the heart. But it's close, because that's exactly what
it was. Being stabbed in the heart emotionally, instead of physically. If I were
to choose one over the other, i'd choose to be stabbed pysically. At least then,
i'd know how to get rid of the pain. Maybe now you understand how I feel,
at least a little.
If he didn't have so much responsiblity, he would have probably killed
himself. He couldn't believe that he had fallen in love, just to be rejected.
He couldn't blame her though, no he could never blame her. He loved her
too much. At least now, he understood half the pain that she felt, feels. She
had been forgotten in the shadows, while Inuyasha chose another over her.
At least he knew that she didn't run to someone else, to get away from him.
But still, knowing that she didn't want him, hurt a hell lot more then most
would . He had basically given up life. A stupid youkai
could come into his home, and try to murder him, he wouldn't even try to
stop it. If it weren't for Rin. Rin unknowingly held him to this plain of
existence, just because he had to protect her.
He was currently in his Library feeling sorry for his cursed life, and
watching Jakken mumble about stupid things. When he felt something,
someone coming towards him quickly, he closed his eyes and felt the
familiar presence coming towards him, and stop at the door.
She stopped as soon as she reached the door to where he was. She believed
it was the library she wasn't sure. She just followed his scent here. As she
reached for the door, she suddenly got scared. ' What if he didn't like her
at all, and she was just imaginning things'. 'What if because she felt so
lonely that she was picturing things that truly weren't there'. 'What if she
was just picturing something bigger then it really was'. 'I mean a kiss is a
kiss it doesn't mean anything. He could have just been playing around with
her emotions'. She growled 'if he was then he's going to get payment back
in full with intrest'. She raised her hand, slide the door open, and
stepped back involuntarily. Sesshoumaru was standing right there with his
usual stoic face. She sighed, and looked at him.
"We need to talk"
Sesshoumaru nodded and walked back into the room, Kagome following.
She watched amused, as Jaken stuttered his way out, and shut the door
behind him. She looked back at Sesshoumaru, to see him sitting in a chair,
and looking at her chillingly.
"Now, what did you want to talk about?"
Kagome's breath caught, as she was just about to apologize for coming, and leave
when she slapped herself mentally, for wanting to run away. She looked
down at the floor, finding her shoes a better place to look at, then his eyes.
"Us" she answered softly
"What us?" he answered more harshly then intended. She winced, and knew
that she deserved this. She closed her eyes and let herself relax, this was harder
in real life then it was in her head. She looked up into his determinedly.
"I want there to be an us, but if you don't want that then i'll leave, and I won't
bother you anymore"
He looked at her, suprise shown on his face slightly, until it turned into a cold
calculating glare. She closed her eyes and held back her tears, she bowed
respectfully, and turned around walking towards the door. It's a good thing
she already everything packed. She would be leaving tonight with Shippo.
She opened the door and walked out into the hall. Every fiber of her being
wishing he'd stop her, tell her something, anything except what he said
"So you'll be leaving tommorrow?"
Kagome's heart almost stopped,almost. She felt she had no tears to shed. She
shook her head slowly, and turned to look at Sesshoumaru one last time.
"No, i'm leaving tonight" with that, she shut the door behind her, and walked
away.
His mind fell down hill, as he wished his silent plea would reach Kagome.
'please, don't leave me..'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
( ) ( )
(~.~)
Lunakitty stands with hands behind her back and her head bowed.
"I swear this wasn't how I wanted it to be ~_~ when I began to write
this I was planning on making it totally diffrent . ya know she would get
bold, and walk over to him and they would start kissing like crazy then that
would lead to the bedroom and other things.~.~ But well when I got to that
point it I typed something totally diffrent from what I originally thought it
would be...So instead of hot steamy lemon stuff you got more angst... and
at this moment time I don't know if Sesshoumaru is going to stop her or
let her go...The bloody idiot has to much pride ~_~ anyways I know this
story has a lot more angst then what I intended and I know your all getting
sick of it, but I don't know they're all emotionally traumatized and there's
still going to be more angst"
Lunakitty screams"My mom just took my towel!!!!shit it was my favorite towel
. and if ANY of you flame me for this I swear to the gods I won't update 2
times a week, i'll make it more angsty,AND I'll make the chapter's shorter,
I'm on the edge here don't mess with me O.o"
Luna grins anways here are the reviews for the last chapter:
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Dark_Topaz-- He will heheh don't worry, I love torturing Inuyasha
Lyn/Lin ---Gomen nasai for making this chapter so angsty, one of my dear
faithful readers :D
rEbEcCa---Hehe i'm torturing you huh?
misori-chan---....Um right.. Thanks for reviewing !^.^'
ashleekyle---I wish I knew i think I enjoy torturig them though ~.~ I'm so
mean.
Talon DragonFriend---I SWEAR TO THE GODS I DIDN'T MEAN TO MAKE
THIS CHAPTER ANGSTY, IT JUST CAME OUT THAT WAY!!!
Tifa-sama---It wasn't her fault this time, She made on honest effort to be with
him but he didn't say anything but be a jerk. Hmmm and I don't recall saying
anything about Kagome changing back ^.~ it's in her head.
DemonBlade---Yeah it is huh? ~.~ I feel so sorry for them
Dark Star --- This sadness is making people cry huh? . It sure as hell makes
me want to cry and anyways everyone should know by now that i'm horrible
at grammer and I really don't care .
moonbay--The answers will come my dear, just pay attention closely
Xtreme Nuisance ---*Jumps around happily and does a victory dance* I have
another fan !!!Yay!!^.^
holly--Awesome!!Thanks for reviewing ^.^
littledarkbakura--Hello!!Knock knock!!Of course i'm going to keep writing
I'm loving the reviews and i already have a kinda rough draft for a sequel
though im not sure if im going to make a sequel or just a really long Epilouge
dark angel--*rubs her hands together and hunches over laughing evilly* Of
course she's a tease,she needs to make sure that he wants her.
Diana---Why thank you! glad you think the story's good but you can tell i'm
definitly getting better by the longer chapter's and it's a lot better in my head
then the first chapter.
Thanks to everyone else who reviewed and Have a Nice day!!
.~**~Lunakitty~**~.