Sailor Dorks Part 6
Author's Notes - Hey everyone! Sorry it's taken me so long to get the next installment in. I've been extremely busy with my school newspaper (I'm the editor, scary, ne?), volleyball, and school in general. Well, I hope you have fun reading this! ^^ Visit my web site at www.geocites.com/merc1650 too if you get the chance. Thanks and enjoy!
Rating: G or Y, bring on the 2 year-olds!
Disclaimer: AAAAAAAAA!!!!!! I DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES OWN SAILOR MOON!!!!!!!!!! I DON'T OWN THE SHOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DON'T OWN ANY OF THE CHARICTERS!!!!!!!!!! I DON'T OWN ANYTHING RELATED TO THE SHOW ASIDE OF SOME COOL MURCHANDISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND SOME VERY COOL MANGAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
By: Merc
My Little Wise Quote That Sums Up The Whole Series: "The wise man learns from others painful experiences." -The Souls Of The Purgatory
Sailor Dorks Part 6
*Note: There is a national holiday for the celebration of the blooming of the Cherry Blossom Trees, something that Japan takes great pride in having.*
*Another note: The fact about Japan being one of the toughest nations on their children is true. They rank in either second or third for the most amount of time spent in school, and that doesn't count the average 3 hours of studying and the usual cram schools that kids take. All in all, the kids spend more of their youth studying than anything else. Aren't you glad that you don't live there? *
Narrator: Hello everyone and welcome once again to this wonderful addition of Sailor Dorks! This time life around Japan is usual. The scouts are out of school for the annual Cherry Blossom Festival and everyone is having a
ball. Is it me, or do these kids get more time off than us Americans? Hmm, and they say Japan is supposed to be one of the toughest nations in the world or at least on the kids. Uh...back to business here, everyone is together at the park having a picnic, even Ms. Haruna which is weird because I thought that she couldn't stand Serena. Anywho, even Molly and Melvin are there, and having a great time. Now that we have everyone, on with the show!
Melvin: WHO'S UP FOR PICKLEDED ONIONS?!?!?!?!
Everyone: Eeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww!
Melvin: WHAT DO YA MEAN EEW? THESE ARE REALLY GREAT, YOU JUST NEED TO TRY SOME!!!!
Serena: Shut up Dweebmiester.
Haruka: (Whispering to Michiru) and I though that no one could get any nerdier than Amy!
Michiru: (Whispering to Haruka) For sure, whose idea was it to invite the lord of the geeks here anyway?
Molly: Mine.
Haruka and Michiru: ?
Molly: Better watch it, I have the worlds best hearing and the worlds worst common sense!
Raye: Ain't that the truth.
Amy: Ain't ain't a word because it ain't in the dictionary.
Lita: Whatever you say, Amy.
Serena: Oooooooooooooo! Look at all the food! (Breaking into the song, "Food Glorious Food" from the musical Oliver)
Food glorious foooooooood,
Hot sausage and mustard,
While I'm in the moooooooood,
Cold bratwurst and custard!
Peas pudding and salveloys,
What's next in the question?
Me with a huge amount of food about to go into digestion!
Raye: Shut up!
Serena: What? Don't you think my singing abilities are first-rate?
Raye: Absolutely not.
Mina: And you got the words wrong.
Serena: Since when did you know that song?
Raye: Since she met you.
Serena: Raaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyeeeeeeee ttttttthhhaaaaatttt wwwwwwwaaaaaaassssssss meeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnn!!!!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Ms. Haruna: That's quite enough, Serena!
Serena: (Sniffling) yes, *sniffle * Ms. Haruna.
Ms. Haruna: Thank you.
Hotaru: Mmmmmmm, that smells really great, Lita.
Lita: Thanks Hotaru! It's my specialty, want a bite?
Hotaru: Does it have any milk in it that you can taste?
Lita: No, it's all baked in.
Hotaru: Hit me!
Setsuna: ...
Amy: Hey Setsuna, how's your lunch?
Setsuna: (Holding up her index finger as a one moment sign) *GLUP! * Very tasty!
Amy: That's good, what are you having?
Setsuna: Your favorite, a yellow-tailed tuna sandwich!
Amy: ...
Setsuna: Amy are you okay?
Amy: Um...ya why?
Setsuna: You're turning green.
Amy: That's because I...hate...and...despise...yellow...tailed...tuna.
Setsuna: Oh, oops.
Amy: Pardon me for a moment.
Narrator: We interrupt this scene for an update. I bet by now you're probably wondering what ever happened to Darien, Greg, and Ken. Well, for starters it is a regular workweek and so Darien is a workin' away to pay off the bills. Ken is at a picnic with his family (his loving mother wanted him to spend some time with them). Greg, the poor soul is sick and of course Amy is taking care of him. He told her to go on without him, but she made sure to remember to bring him something back. Now that that's out of the way, on with the story!
Haruka: Want a sea cucumber, dear?
Michiru: YUCK!!! GET THAT VILE, DISGUSTING THING AWAY FROM ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Haruka: ?
Michiru: I can't believe you forgot that I have trouble with sea cucumbers!
Haruka: Oh yea...whoops.
Michiru: Oops is right!
Lita: Aren't those Cherry Blossom Trees so pretty?
Mina: (Dreamily) ya...
Lita: *Sigh *
Mina: (Dreamily) I could just see myself with some totally hot guy one night when these trees are blooming...under the stars...and...
Lita: Kissing?
Mina: Yea, kissing...
Lita: Well, dream on girl!
Mina: Hey!
Lita: He he...
Mina: Why you little...!
*Mina attacks Lita with a glob of rice, which misses Lita and hits Raye, who throws her tarioki at Serena thinking it was her who threw it, which started a massive food fight. *
Haruka: @#$%^L!
Michiru: AAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!! MY HAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lita: Mighty mighty THROW!!!!!!!!!!
Amy: Eek!
Serena: (Screaming like an opera singer) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Raye: MY EARS!!!!!!!!!!!
Hotaru: HEY, WHO THREW THAT?!?!?!?
*SPLAT! *
*GLORP! *
*STICK *
*AAAA! *
*THPTHP! *
*BAM! *
*HEY! *
*MY DRESS! *
*MY GLASSES! *
*MY MAKEUP! *
*GLOP! *
Ms. Haruna: Please, everyone just clam down!
Setsuna: EAT OKONUMIAKI TEACHER!!!!!!!
*SPLAT! *
Ms. Haruna: Why you...!
CHAPTER 2
Narrator: Well, some how, some way, Queen Beryl found out about the 4 Generals failure and went into overload. The Generals were killed (yay!) and Queen Beryl nearly killed herself too. She didn't however, and hired some new Generals to take their place. Their names: General Rubeus, General Ann (this should be interesting), General Bob, and General Birdie. Along with being hired, they had to sign a contract saying that they know the risks of failure. They also had to sign a bunch of contracts for their new life and health insurance companies. Now that we have that taken care of, on with the show!
Birdie: He he he he he...we've got them now.
Ann: Those stupid scouts are gonna pay for our past pain!
Bob: (Really giddy, like he had one too many cappuccinos) when do we start killing?
Rubeus: (Demented) They're gonna pay, gonna pay, gonna pay!
Ann: So when do we start whooping some sailor butt?
Bob: (Giddy) Killing! When?
Birdie: Calm down sugar boy, we're working on it.
Bob: (Giddy) on what?
Birdie: A plan to kill those scoutz.
Rubeus: Don't you mean scouts?
Birdie: That's what I said, scoutz.
Rubeus: No you're saying scoutz, not scouts.
Ann: He's right.
Rubeus: You have a lisp.
Birdie: Nobody's perfect.
Bob: You gotta get that fixed.
Birdie: Why?
Bob: Because an enemy with a lisp isn't really that scary.
Birdie: So?
Ann: We want them to be chilled to the bone when our names are said.
Rubeus: Yea, until then we'll just have to suffer with them laughing when out names are mentioned.
Birdie: How nice.
Bob: You were the one that told us to apply.
Birdie: I was?
Bob: Well, actually it was Diamond and Alan, but you agreed.
Birdie: Whatever Bob.
Bob: I hate it when people say my name.
Rubeus: Bob.
Ann: Bob.
Birdie: Bob.
Bob: Shut up.
Rubeus: ...
Ann: ...
Birdie: ...
Bob: ...
Birdie: Bob.
Chapter 3
Narrator: With the end of the day drawing near, the girls pack up their picnic baskets and quickly head home with the exception of Amy. She quickly dropped by Greg's house to give him a couple of picnic goodies that she was
able to save. After their quick excursions to either home or wherever, they met at Raye's temple for a very quick scout meeting before going home and going to beddy-bye. Notice how everything is quick now, guess the girls had
one too many nutty-buddies.
Serena: Is this gonna be long?
Luna: Why?
Serena: Because my tummy's full and I'm sleepy, that's why.
Raye: I think someone's been hanging around Reeny too long.
Serena: For once I think you might be right.
Raye: I'm always right.
Serena: You wish.
Raye: Hey I wouldn't be talking, Odango Atama!
Serena: Odango Ata-what?
Raye: Odango Atama.
Serena: What in the name of Serenity does that mean?
Raye: You should know.
Serena: Huh?
Raye: It's Japanese, it means Dumpling Head.
Serena: Why should I have known that?
Raye: Serena, where do you live?
Serena: Heck if I know, I speak English and I live someplace that writes with weird little pictures.
Lita: Does the name Tokyo ring a bell?
Serena: We live in Tokyo?
Lita: Duh!
Serena: Then why do we use American currency and speak American English?
Mina: Didn't we talk about this sometime back?
Amy: Sometimes it's best to leave odd questions unanswered.
Haruka: Does this mean that for once in your weak, pathetic, little life you have no idea?
Amy: I oughta slug you.
Haruka: Take your best shot.
Artemis: That's enough! Now, for once I'm going to be serious and say that we need to get cracking on important stuff!
Haruka: Isn't this important?
Artemis: No!
Luna: Sit down before I have to hurt you!
Haruka: (Mumbling) fine, fine, jeez, temperamental...
Luna: Hph.
Reeny: So?
Hotaru: So?
Reeny: What's the haps, why are we all here?
Artemis: Because the Negaturds are at it again.
Amy: They're on top of the UPS building from what I've got.
Haruka: You mean that really, really tall building with the big UPS sign on it?
Amy: Um, yea.
Haruka: And to think you guys all call me dumb.
Michiru: ...
Hotaru: ...
Setsuna: ...
Haruka: Why aren't you guys saying anything.
Reeny: Take a guess, oh smart one.
Mina: Um...so like, are we going or what?
Lita: I think the outies are still debating that.
Mina: Well the outies are stupid, let's book.
Lita: Right behind ya!
Amy: Wait for me!
Serena: And me!
Raye: And me!
*The four inner scouts plus Luna and Artemis bolt out the door leaving the outers sitting dumbfounded. *
Michiru: Abandoned once again.
Setsuna: Put a cork in it, Michiru.
Michiru: !
Chapter 4
Narrator: After some serious screaming to wait up, all the scouts, plus outers run over to the big UPS building where the Negaverse waits impatiently for them.
Ann: They're late.
Bob: What else is new?
Birdie: That's odd, normally they always know what we're doing and when.
Rubeus: I'm giving them 30 more seconds to get their Sailor @L%s over here.
One...
Birdie: Do de do de do
Ann: (Humming) hmmmmmm.
Rubeus: Two...
Bob: *Whistle *
Rubeus: Three...
Moon: THE SAILOR SCOUTS ARE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rubeus and Bob: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ann: Babies.
Birdie: It's about time.
Rubeus: (Stammering) wha-, who-, how-, DON'T SCARE ME LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!!!
Moon: Aino seigno sera fuku bishoushou senshi Sailormoon! Tsukini kawate, oshoukyo!
Mars: I'm impressed.
Rubeus: Uh, fer me la butsh?
Bob: No entiendo.
Ann: Blick blah ich darf blech!
Birdie: I'm not even gonna try.
Saturn: What in the name of Mike did you just say?
Moon: I said my battle speech in Japanese. I tell you what that thing really needed some sprucing up.
Luna: (Sarcastic) oh yea Sailor Moon, you really strike fear into every villains heart.
Moon: Thanks!
Pluto: So where did Zoicite, Malachite, Jedite, and Neflite go?
Ann: Dead.
Birdie: Gone.
Rubeus: Expired.
Bob: Gone bye-bye.
Venus: Dangit! That Malachite was such a cutie!
Jupiter: Excuse me, Neflite was so much cuter!
Mars: (Making a buzzer sound) aaaannnnnnn! You're both wrong, its Jedite who's the cutest!
Mercury: At least act like you're more interested in the fight than in boys for awhile, please?
Pluto: Don't even bother, Mercury.
Chibi-Moon: Is this what happens when you become a teenager?
Mercury: Uh, pretty much.
Chibi-Moon: AAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't wanna be a teenager! Kill me, kill me now!
Uranus: Sorry, gotta protect your royal butt.
Neptune: Wish we could though.
Chibi-Moon: L&^%!
Mercury: Now where's that Luna P.?
Chibi-Moon: Oops...LUNA P.!!!!!!!!!!
Rubeus: I'd be willing to take her off your hands for ya!
Jupiter: Sorry Rubes, no can do, thanks for the offer, though.
Rubeus: (c)(tm)#$!
Chibi-Moon: MERCURY!!!!!!!!!!!
Mercury: Now I know that space ship is around here somewhere...
Rubeus: (Quickly) AA!
Ann: So are we gonna fight or what?
Jupiter: I'm all for fighting.
Venus: I'm all for talking.
Jupiter: Lazy.
Venus: Am not.
Jupiter: Are to.
Venus: Am not.
Jupiter: Are to.
Venus: Am not.
Jupiter: Are to.
Pluto: Enough! You two sound just like Sailor Moon and Sailor Mars!
Venus: So?
Pluto: I can hardly wait to see the day you people graduate from school.
Jupiter: WE GRADUATE!?!?!?!?
Pluto: Uh, eventually.
Venus: Eventually?
Pluto: Yea.
Venus: I take it you just said something that you weren't supposed to.
Pluto: Yup.
Mars: MARS FLAME SNIPER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
All 4 Generals: AAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! Hot hot hot!
Venus: VENUS LOVE AND BEAUTY SHOCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ann: That is the worst excuse for a power I've ever heard in my life.
Bob: AAAAAAAAA!!! I've got makeup on!!! Help!!!
Uranus: WORLD SHAKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
All 4 Generals: I'm SHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAKKKKKKKKKKiiiiiINnnGGGGGGG!!!
Neptune: You da man!
Chibi-Moon: Don't you mean woman?
Neptune: Butt out, Chibs.
Chibi-Moon: Mommy!
Moon: MOON TIARA...!!!!!!!!!!
Neptune: All right, all right I take it back!
Moon: Better.
Ann: So Neptuna, are we gonna fight or what?
Neptune: NEPTUNA?!?!?!?
Ann: YAAG!!!!!!!!!!!!
*Neptune gets blasted into a brick wall by a beam of pink energy. *
Neptune: Ouch.
Uranus: Neptune! (Uranus runs over to a wounded Neptune) oh my darling! Poor thing...
Neptune: (Weakly) Uranus...
Uranus: Shhh, not another word sweetie, you just lie down now and I'll make everything okay.
Jupiter: Hello! I don't think this is something a 9 year-old and a 16 year-old who thinks like a 9 year-old should see!
Mercury: Oh gross.
Saturn: I am so gonna hurl.
Birdie: Are we gonna fight or what? We've been talking for so long that I'm starting to forget how to!
Mercury: Complain, complain.
Birdie: You wanna piece of me?
Mercury: MERCURY AQUA RAPSODY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*BAM! *
Birdie: ...
Bob: (Sarcastically) perfect.
Venus: Well, well, well, if it ain't ol' Bob.
Bob: I am so tired of this.
Venus: Of what?
Bob: How everyone says my name.
Venus: Why?
Bob: Because, don't you hate it when I say Venus instead of Venus?
Venus: No, Bob.
Bob: Ditz.
Venus: Jerk.
Bob: Pathetic.
Venus: Pervert.
Bob: Lizard lips!
Venus: Peanut butter butt!
Bob: Wart face!
Venus: Old fart!
Mercury: SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bob and Venus: Geek!
Mercury: SHINE AQUA ILLUSION!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bob: Brrrrrrrrrr!
Venus: Hey I was just about to do that!
Mercury: Freeze him?
Venus: No, love me chain him.
Jupiter: Okay, I have had, like, no say in this what so ever so I'm really mad. Prepare to die Negajunkies!
Ann: I take it this isn't a good thing.
Jupiter: JUPITER THUNDER DRAGON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz! *
Ann: ...
Jupiter: He he he, roasted, toasted, and electrocuted to a crisp.
Saturn: I hate you people. You're nothing but a worthless bunch of poopy heads! I hate you so (sticks out tongue) nya!
Rubeus: Is that honestly the best you can do?
Saturn: Yes.
Rubeus: And I thought Sailor Mercury was easy.
Mercury: Hey I resent that!
Saturn: I can't really help it, I forgot my powers.
Rubeus: (Trying and miserably failing at not laughing) you *kch * forgot
*kch * your *kch * POWERS?!?!? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Saturn: You're mean!
Rubeus: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!! STOP, STOP, STOP!!!! YOU'RE KILLING ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HA HA HA!!!!!!!!
Saturn: You big bully!
Jupiter: Just ignore him, if he continues, I'll beat his brain in for ya.
Saturn: Really?
Jupiter: Scouts honor.
Rubeus: HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mercury: Um okay, hey Sailor Moon, think it's about time ya killed the Negataods before they annoy us to death?
Moon: Ho ya! This time I'm going with the slow and scary death.
Rubeus: (Recovering from his laugh attack) You mean your *kch * halation?
Moon: No, by scepter.
Rubeus: In that case I had better grab a tub of jumbo-sized popcorn.
Moon: Why?
Rubeus: Because you take so long to activate that thing and it looks like your dancing, so I feel like I'm at a ballet or STOMP or something.
Moon: Um, okay...MMMMMOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNN SCEPTER ACTIVATIOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rubeus: Missed us all!
Moon: Huh? Hey, what gives?
Rubeus: The fact that you were too stupid to realize that I grabbed everyone in the middle of your performance and left.
Moon: Then why am I talking to you?
Rubeus: There's a walkie-talkie behind that air-conditioner vent.
Moon: Oh.
Rubeus: So long suckers!
*There's a crackling noise that comes from behind the air-conditioning vent and then all is silent. *
Moon: Who does he think he is calling us suckers?
Chibi-Moon: SUCKERS, WHERE?!?!?!
Mercury: No where, Chibs.
Chibi-Moon: Waaaaaaaaaa! I wanted a sucker!
Everyone: Oy.
Chapter 5
Narrator: Well, everyone went back home after their first encounter with the new generals. They're all tired from a hard days work and plan to go to bed. The next day is a Sunday, lucky them and everyone is out and about. Serena is out Darien on a lovely date, Amy is visiting Greg at his sick bed, and Raye is sweeping the porch in front of her temple. Lita and Mina are watching a movie starring their favorite comedian, Adam Sandler. Haruka and Michiru are at the park um; having a little fun shall we say? Reeny is at home causing mayhem and Hotaru to, is busy causing yet more mayhem at her home with yet the third blown fuse in a month. Setsuna is hanging out at the Time Gate for fun (when ya gotta get away, ya gotta get away), and Luna and Artemis are duking it out at Central Control. Now that everyone is cleared, on with the show!
Serena: (Dreamily) oh Daaaahrrien.
Darien: (Thinking) who am I? Why does she love me so much? How come I have to be so much older than her? What could possibly possess her to wear the same hairstyle day after day? Why do my bangs stick out so far? I think I need a haircut. Why don't I, let alone anyone else in this world have ACNE? Why can't I fall for anyone my own age? Who am I...?
Serena: Darien?
Darien: Huh?
Serena: Are you, like, okay?
Darien: Never better.
Serena: You just spaced off there that's all.
Darien: That's because I was too busy thinking about you, that's all sweetie.
Serena: Oh muffin...
Darien: (Thinking) who am I again?
Meanwhile...
Amy: Hey there, how are you feeling?
Greg: (Throaty) like an amoeba in the premarital soup.
Amy: Oh poor thing. How was the food that I brought you?
Greg: Very good, thanks for scraping some up for me.
Amy: No problem.
Greg: After a while chicken noodle soup starts to taste like chalk.
Amy: I know the feeling.
Greg: I'd kiss you, but I'm afraid that I'd give you my germs.
Amy: (Giggling) that's okay. Maybe some other time.
Greg: Yea.
Meanwhile...
Raye: *Sweep **sweep **sweep *, there, finally finished.
Reeny: WHEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!
Raye: AAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY BEAUTIFLY SWEPT FLOOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reeny: Huh?
Raye: YOU LITTLE BRAT, WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA CLOMPING AROUND HERE IN YOUR GRIMY, DISGUSTING, MUDDY, DIRTY, DOG-DOO'D, BUG-GUTTY, GUM-STICKY, LITTLE SHOES?!?!?!?!?!?
Reeny: Um, I was bored of causing pure mayhem at home?
Raye: WHY?!?!?!?!
Reeny: Because everyone there is used to it and they don't care?
Raye: GET LOST YA LITTLE BRAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reeny: Can't make me! Remember, I the heir to the Earth throne!
Raye: I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE THE HEIR TO THE UNIVERSAL THRONE, GET OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reeny: Meanie!
Raye: @#$%^&L*J#@$(tm)(c)^*(r)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reeny: AMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Raye: (Trying very hard to surpress her anger) mmmmmmm...
Reeny: Wow I've never seen anyone turn that shade of red before.
Raye: Get...out...or...else...
Reeny: Fine, fine, fine, I'm going, I'm going, sheesh what a grouch!
Meanwhile...
Lita: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Mina: He he he he he!
Lita: (Trying to stop laughing) *kch * that was *kch * hilarious!
Mina: (Laughing uncontrollably)
yeayeaandwhatabouthepartwhereRobbyfindsoutthatJulia'slastnamewillbeGulia?
Lita: I didn't understand a word you just said.
Mina: WhatdoyameanLita?
Lita: Put spaces between your words!
Mina: Um, um, okay.
Lita: Better, now, what were you just saying?
Mina: I said *insert deep breath here * yea, yea, and what about the part where Robby finds out that Julia's last name will be Gulia?
Lita: Oh, yea that was a hoot!
Mina: *Kch **kch * HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lita: Breathe Mina.
Mina: (Taking a deep breath) uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Lita: Good.
Meanwhile...
Haruka: Michiru...
Michiru: Haruka...
Haruka: Michiru...
Michiru: Haruka...
Haruka: Oh my darling, I can't take it any longer!
Michiru: Neither can I!
Haruka: Let's go!
Michiru: I don't think I can hold it much longer!
Haruka: There it is!
Michiru: I get dibs on the first open stall!
Haruka: Oh no you don't, I've been holding it in for an hour!
Michiru: Aaaaaaaaa! I think I'm gonna pee in my pants!
Haruka: Made it!
*Two bathroom stall doors slam shut. *
Haruka: Oooooooooohhhhhhhhhh!
Michiru: This is bliss...
Meanwhile...
Prof. Tomoe: NOT AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hotaru: Whoops.
Prof. Tomoe: HOTARU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hotaru: I am so dead...
Meanwhile...
Setsuna: I loved relaxing to the sound of a clock ticking.
Clock: *Tick **tick **tick *
Setsuna: Hmmm...
Clock: *Tick **tick **tick *
Setsuna: ...
Clock: *Tick **tick **tick *
Setsuna: Okay that's enough of listening to the clock.
Meanwhile...
Luna: No way tuna-breath!
Artemis: Yes way fish-face!
Luna: No way pickle-brain!
Artemis: Yes way fur-tushie!
Luna: There is no way on the face of this Earth that any of the Sailor Scouts would turn on us at any time!
Artemis: What about Uranus and Neptune? They are mighty suspicious to me!
Luna: Why?
Artemis: Because! I mean, aren't they, like, hopelessly in love with each other and would turn on us if it meant being together forever, and even if it were in heck?
Luna: No!
Artemis: Yes!
Luna: No!
Artemis: Yes!
Narrator: Um, okay so that's the end of this part! The world is once again safe from the forces of evil thanks to the Sailor Scouts!
The End?
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So, do you guys like it, hate it, or indifferent to it? Tell me! I'm totally into reviews. E-mails, IM's, and hits on my site at www.geocities.com/merc1650 are always welcome. Thanks for reading this edition of Sailor Dorks!
Author's Notes - Hey everyone! Sorry it's taken me so long to get the next installment in. I've been extremely busy with my school newspaper (I'm the editor, scary, ne?), volleyball, and school in general. Well, I hope you have fun reading this! ^^ Visit my web site at www.geocites.com/merc1650 too if you get the chance. Thanks and enjoy!
Rating: G or Y, bring on the 2 year-olds!
Disclaimer: AAAAAAAAA!!!!!! I DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES OWN SAILOR MOON!!!!!!!!!! I DON'T OWN THE SHOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DON'T OWN ANY OF THE CHARICTERS!!!!!!!!!! I DON'T OWN ANYTHING RELATED TO THE SHOW ASIDE OF SOME COOL MURCHANDISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND SOME VERY COOL MANGAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
By: Merc
My Little Wise Quote That Sums Up The Whole Series: "The wise man learns from others painful experiences." -The Souls Of The Purgatory
Sailor Dorks Part 6
*Note: There is a national holiday for the celebration of the blooming of the Cherry Blossom Trees, something that Japan takes great pride in having.*
*Another note: The fact about Japan being one of the toughest nations on their children is true. They rank in either second or third for the most amount of time spent in school, and that doesn't count the average 3 hours of studying and the usual cram schools that kids take. All in all, the kids spend more of their youth studying than anything else. Aren't you glad that you don't live there? *
Narrator: Hello everyone and welcome once again to this wonderful addition of Sailor Dorks! This time life around Japan is usual. The scouts are out of school for the annual Cherry Blossom Festival and everyone is having a
ball. Is it me, or do these kids get more time off than us Americans? Hmm, and they say Japan is supposed to be one of the toughest nations in the world or at least on the kids. Uh...back to business here, everyone is together at the park having a picnic, even Ms. Haruna which is weird because I thought that she couldn't stand Serena. Anywho, even Molly and Melvin are there, and having a great time. Now that we have everyone, on with the show!
Melvin: WHO'S UP FOR PICKLEDED ONIONS?!?!?!?!
Everyone: Eeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww!
Melvin: WHAT DO YA MEAN EEW? THESE ARE REALLY GREAT, YOU JUST NEED TO TRY SOME!!!!
Serena: Shut up Dweebmiester.
Haruka: (Whispering to Michiru) and I though that no one could get any nerdier than Amy!
Michiru: (Whispering to Haruka) For sure, whose idea was it to invite the lord of the geeks here anyway?
Molly: Mine.
Haruka and Michiru: ?
Molly: Better watch it, I have the worlds best hearing and the worlds worst common sense!
Raye: Ain't that the truth.
Amy: Ain't ain't a word because it ain't in the dictionary.
Lita: Whatever you say, Amy.
Serena: Oooooooooooooo! Look at all the food! (Breaking into the song, "Food Glorious Food" from the musical Oliver)
Food glorious foooooooood,
Hot sausage and mustard,
While I'm in the moooooooood,
Cold bratwurst and custard!
Peas pudding and salveloys,
What's next in the question?
Me with a huge amount of food about to go into digestion!
Raye: Shut up!
Serena: What? Don't you think my singing abilities are first-rate?
Raye: Absolutely not.
Mina: And you got the words wrong.
Serena: Since when did you know that song?
Raye: Since she met you.
Serena: Raaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyeeeeeeee ttttttthhhaaaaatttt wwwwwwwaaaaaaassssssss meeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnn!!!!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Ms. Haruna: That's quite enough, Serena!
Serena: (Sniffling) yes, *sniffle * Ms. Haruna.
Ms. Haruna: Thank you.
Hotaru: Mmmmmmm, that smells really great, Lita.
Lita: Thanks Hotaru! It's my specialty, want a bite?
Hotaru: Does it have any milk in it that you can taste?
Lita: No, it's all baked in.
Hotaru: Hit me!
Setsuna: ...
Amy: Hey Setsuna, how's your lunch?
Setsuna: (Holding up her index finger as a one moment sign) *GLUP! * Very tasty!
Amy: That's good, what are you having?
Setsuna: Your favorite, a yellow-tailed tuna sandwich!
Amy: ...
Setsuna: Amy are you okay?
Amy: Um...ya why?
Setsuna: You're turning green.
Amy: That's because I...hate...and...despise...yellow...tailed...tuna.
Setsuna: Oh, oops.
Amy: Pardon me for a moment.
Narrator: We interrupt this scene for an update. I bet by now you're probably wondering what ever happened to Darien, Greg, and Ken. Well, for starters it is a regular workweek and so Darien is a workin' away to pay off the bills. Ken is at a picnic with his family (his loving mother wanted him to spend some time with them). Greg, the poor soul is sick and of course Amy is taking care of him. He told her to go on without him, but she made sure to remember to bring him something back. Now that that's out of the way, on with the story!
Haruka: Want a sea cucumber, dear?
Michiru: YUCK!!! GET THAT VILE, DISGUSTING THING AWAY FROM ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Haruka: ?
Michiru: I can't believe you forgot that I have trouble with sea cucumbers!
Haruka: Oh yea...whoops.
Michiru: Oops is right!
Lita: Aren't those Cherry Blossom Trees so pretty?
Mina: (Dreamily) ya...
Lita: *Sigh *
Mina: (Dreamily) I could just see myself with some totally hot guy one night when these trees are blooming...under the stars...and...
Lita: Kissing?
Mina: Yea, kissing...
Lita: Well, dream on girl!
Mina: Hey!
Lita: He he...
Mina: Why you little...!
*Mina attacks Lita with a glob of rice, which misses Lita and hits Raye, who throws her tarioki at Serena thinking it was her who threw it, which started a massive food fight. *
Haruka: @#$%^L!
Michiru: AAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!! MY HAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lita: Mighty mighty THROW!!!!!!!!!!
Amy: Eek!
Serena: (Screaming like an opera singer) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Raye: MY EARS!!!!!!!!!!!
Hotaru: HEY, WHO THREW THAT?!?!?!?
*SPLAT! *
*GLORP! *
*STICK *
*AAAA! *
*THPTHP! *
*BAM! *
*HEY! *
*MY DRESS! *
*MY GLASSES! *
*MY MAKEUP! *
*GLOP! *
Ms. Haruna: Please, everyone just clam down!
Setsuna: EAT OKONUMIAKI TEACHER!!!!!!!
*SPLAT! *
Ms. Haruna: Why you...!
CHAPTER 2
Narrator: Well, some how, some way, Queen Beryl found out about the 4 Generals failure and went into overload. The Generals were killed (yay!) and Queen Beryl nearly killed herself too. She didn't however, and hired some new Generals to take their place. Their names: General Rubeus, General Ann (this should be interesting), General Bob, and General Birdie. Along with being hired, they had to sign a contract saying that they know the risks of failure. They also had to sign a bunch of contracts for their new life and health insurance companies. Now that we have that taken care of, on with the show!
Birdie: He he he he he...we've got them now.
Ann: Those stupid scouts are gonna pay for our past pain!
Bob: (Really giddy, like he had one too many cappuccinos) when do we start killing?
Rubeus: (Demented) They're gonna pay, gonna pay, gonna pay!
Ann: So when do we start whooping some sailor butt?
Bob: (Giddy) Killing! When?
Birdie: Calm down sugar boy, we're working on it.
Bob: (Giddy) on what?
Birdie: A plan to kill those scoutz.
Rubeus: Don't you mean scouts?
Birdie: That's what I said, scoutz.
Rubeus: No you're saying scoutz, not scouts.
Ann: He's right.
Rubeus: You have a lisp.
Birdie: Nobody's perfect.
Bob: You gotta get that fixed.
Birdie: Why?
Bob: Because an enemy with a lisp isn't really that scary.
Birdie: So?
Ann: We want them to be chilled to the bone when our names are said.
Rubeus: Yea, until then we'll just have to suffer with them laughing when out names are mentioned.
Birdie: How nice.
Bob: You were the one that told us to apply.
Birdie: I was?
Bob: Well, actually it was Diamond and Alan, but you agreed.
Birdie: Whatever Bob.
Bob: I hate it when people say my name.
Rubeus: Bob.
Ann: Bob.
Birdie: Bob.
Bob: Shut up.
Rubeus: ...
Ann: ...
Birdie: ...
Bob: ...
Birdie: Bob.
Chapter 3
Narrator: With the end of the day drawing near, the girls pack up their picnic baskets and quickly head home with the exception of Amy. She quickly dropped by Greg's house to give him a couple of picnic goodies that she was
able to save. After their quick excursions to either home or wherever, they met at Raye's temple for a very quick scout meeting before going home and going to beddy-bye. Notice how everything is quick now, guess the girls had
one too many nutty-buddies.
Serena: Is this gonna be long?
Luna: Why?
Serena: Because my tummy's full and I'm sleepy, that's why.
Raye: I think someone's been hanging around Reeny too long.
Serena: For once I think you might be right.
Raye: I'm always right.
Serena: You wish.
Raye: Hey I wouldn't be talking, Odango Atama!
Serena: Odango Ata-what?
Raye: Odango Atama.
Serena: What in the name of Serenity does that mean?
Raye: You should know.
Serena: Huh?
Raye: It's Japanese, it means Dumpling Head.
Serena: Why should I have known that?
Raye: Serena, where do you live?
Serena: Heck if I know, I speak English and I live someplace that writes with weird little pictures.
Lita: Does the name Tokyo ring a bell?
Serena: We live in Tokyo?
Lita: Duh!
Serena: Then why do we use American currency and speak American English?
Mina: Didn't we talk about this sometime back?
Amy: Sometimes it's best to leave odd questions unanswered.
Haruka: Does this mean that for once in your weak, pathetic, little life you have no idea?
Amy: I oughta slug you.
Haruka: Take your best shot.
Artemis: That's enough! Now, for once I'm going to be serious and say that we need to get cracking on important stuff!
Haruka: Isn't this important?
Artemis: No!
Luna: Sit down before I have to hurt you!
Haruka: (Mumbling) fine, fine, jeez, temperamental...
Luna: Hph.
Reeny: So?
Hotaru: So?
Reeny: What's the haps, why are we all here?
Artemis: Because the Negaturds are at it again.
Amy: They're on top of the UPS building from what I've got.
Haruka: You mean that really, really tall building with the big UPS sign on it?
Amy: Um, yea.
Haruka: And to think you guys all call me dumb.
Michiru: ...
Hotaru: ...
Setsuna: ...
Haruka: Why aren't you guys saying anything.
Reeny: Take a guess, oh smart one.
Mina: Um...so like, are we going or what?
Lita: I think the outies are still debating that.
Mina: Well the outies are stupid, let's book.
Lita: Right behind ya!
Amy: Wait for me!
Serena: And me!
Raye: And me!
*The four inner scouts plus Luna and Artemis bolt out the door leaving the outers sitting dumbfounded. *
Michiru: Abandoned once again.
Setsuna: Put a cork in it, Michiru.
Michiru: !
Chapter 4
Narrator: After some serious screaming to wait up, all the scouts, plus outers run over to the big UPS building where the Negaverse waits impatiently for them.
Ann: They're late.
Bob: What else is new?
Birdie: That's odd, normally they always know what we're doing and when.
Rubeus: I'm giving them 30 more seconds to get their Sailor @L%s over here.
One...
Birdie: Do de do de do
Ann: (Humming) hmmmmmm.
Rubeus: Two...
Bob: *Whistle *
Rubeus: Three...
Moon: THE SAILOR SCOUTS ARE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rubeus and Bob: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ann: Babies.
Birdie: It's about time.
Rubeus: (Stammering) wha-, who-, how-, DON'T SCARE ME LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!!!
Moon: Aino seigno sera fuku bishoushou senshi Sailormoon! Tsukini kawate, oshoukyo!
Mars: I'm impressed.
Rubeus: Uh, fer me la butsh?
Bob: No entiendo.
Ann: Blick blah ich darf blech!
Birdie: I'm not even gonna try.
Saturn: What in the name of Mike did you just say?
Moon: I said my battle speech in Japanese. I tell you what that thing really needed some sprucing up.
Luna: (Sarcastic) oh yea Sailor Moon, you really strike fear into every villains heart.
Moon: Thanks!
Pluto: So where did Zoicite, Malachite, Jedite, and Neflite go?
Ann: Dead.
Birdie: Gone.
Rubeus: Expired.
Bob: Gone bye-bye.
Venus: Dangit! That Malachite was such a cutie!
Jupiter: Excuse me, Neflite was so much cuter!
Mars: (Making a buzzer sound) aaaannnnnnn! You're both wrong, its Jedite who's the cutest!
Mercury: At least act like you're more interested in the fight than in boys for awhile, please?
Pluto: Don't even bother, Mercury.
Chibi-Moon: Is this what happens when you become a teenager?
Mercury: Uh, pretty much.
Chibi-Moon: AAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't wanna be a teenager! Kill me, kill me now!
Uranus: Sorry, gotta protect your royal butt.
Neptune: Wish we could though.
Chibi-Moon: L&^%!
Mercury: Now where's that Luna P.?
Chibi-Moon: Oops...LUNA P.!!!!!!!!!!
Rubeus: I'd be willing to take her off your hands for ya!
Jupiter: Sorry Rubes, no can do, thanks for the offer, though.
Rubeus: (c)(tm)#$!
Chibi-Moon: MERCURY!!!!!!!!!!!
Mercury: Now I know that space ship is around here somewhere...
Rubeus: (Quickly) AA!
Ann: So are we gonna fight or what?
Jupiter: I'm all for fighting.
Venus: I'm all for talking.
Jupiter: Lazy.
Venus: Am not.
Jupiter: Are to.
Venus: Am not.
Jupiter: Are to.
Venus: Am not.
Jupiter: Are to.
Pluto: Enough! You two sound just like Sailor Moon and Sailor Mars!
Venus: So?
Pluto: I can hardly wait to see the day you people graduate from school.
Jupiter: WE GRADUATE!?!?!?!?
Pluto: Uh, eventually.
Venus: Eventually?
Pluto: Yea.
Venus: I take it you just said something that you weren't supposed to.
Pluto: Yup.
Mars: MARS FLAME SNIPER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
All 4 Generals: AAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! Hot hot hot!
Venus: VENUS LOVE AND BEAUTY SHOCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ann: That is the worst excuse for a power I've ever heard in my life.
Bob: AAAAAAAAA!!! I've got makeup on!!! Help!!!
Uranus: WORLD SHAKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
All 4 Generals: I'm SHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAKKKKKKKKKKiiiiiINnnGGGGGGG!!!
Neptune: You da man!
Chibi-Moon: Don't you mean woman?
Neptune: Butt out, Chibs.
Chibi-Moon: Mommy!
Moon: MOON TIARA...!!!!!!!!!!
Neptune: All right, all right I take it back!
Moon: Better.
Ann: So Neptuna, are we gonna fight or what?
Neptune: NEPTUNA?!?!?!?
Ann: YAAG!!!!!!!!!!!!
*Neptune gets blasted into a brick wall by a beam of pink energy. *
Neptune: Ouch.
Uranus: Neptune! (Uranus runs over to a wounded Neptune) oh my darling! Poor thing...
Neptune: (Weakly) Uranus...
Uranus: Shhh, not another word sweetie, you just lie down now and I'll make everything okay.
Jupiter: Hello! I don't think this is something a 9 year-old and a 16 year-old who thinks like a 9 year-old should see!
Mercury: Oh gross.
Saturn: I am so gonna hurl.
Birdie: Are we gonna fight or what? We've been talking for so long that I'm starting to forget how to!
Mercury: Complain, complain.
Birdie: You wanna piece of me?
Mercury: MERCURY AQUA RAPSODY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*BAM! *
Birdie: ...
Bob: (Sarcastically) perfect.
Venus: Well, well, well, if it ain't ol' Bob.
Bob: I am so tired of this.
Venus: Of what?
Bob: How everyone says my name.
Venus: Why?
Bob: Because, don't you hate it when I say Venus instead of Venus?
Venus: No, Bob.
Bob: Ditz.
Venus: Jerk.
Bob: Pathetic.
Venus: Pervert.
Bob: Lizard lips!
Venus: Peanut butter butt!
Bob: Wart face!
Venus: Old fart!
Mercury: SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bob and Venus: Geek!
Mercury: SHINE AQUA ILLUSION!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bob: Brrrrrrrrrr!
Venus: Hey I was just about to do that!
Mercury: Freeze him?
Venus: No, love me chain him.
Jupiter: Okay, I have had, like, no say in this what so ever so I'm really mad. Prepare to die Negajunkies!
Ann: I take it this isn't a good thing.
Jupiter: JUPITER THUNDER DRAGON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz! *
Ann: ...
Jupiter: He he he, roasted, toasted, and electrocuted to a crisp.
Saturn: I hate you people. You're nothing but a worthless bunch of poopy heads! I hate you so (sticks out tongue) nya!
Rubeus: Is that honestly the best you can do?
Saturn: Yes.
Rubeus: And I thought Sailor Mercury was easy.
Mercury: Hey I resent that!
Saturn: I can't really help it, I forgot my powers.
Rubeus: (Trying and miserably failing at not laughing) you *kch * forgot
*kch * your *kch * POWERS?!?!? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Saturn: You're mean!
Rubeus: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!! STOP, STOP, STOP!!!! YOU'RE KILLING ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HA HA HA!!!!!!!!
Saturn: You big bully!
Jupiter: Just ignore him, if he continues, I'll beat his brain in for ya.
Saturn: Really?
Jupiter: Scouts honor.
Rubeus: HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mercury: Um okay, hey Sailor Moon, think it's about time ya killed the Negataods before they annoy us to death?
Moon: Ho ya! This time I'm going with the slow and scary death.
Rubeus: (Recovering from his laugh attack) You mean your *kch * halation?
Moon: No, by scepter.
Rubeus: In that case I had better grab a tub of jumbo-sized popcorn.
Moon: Why?
Rubeus: Because you take so long to activate that thing and it looks like your dancing, so I feel like I'm at a ballet or STOMP or something.
Moon: Um, okay...MMMMMOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNN SCEPTER ACTIVATIOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rubeus: Missed us all!
Moon: Huh? Hey, what gives?
Rubeus: The fact that you were too stupid to realize that I grabbed everyone in the middle of your performance and left.
Moon: Then why am I talking to you?
Rubeus: There's a walkie-talkie behind that air-conditioner vent.
Moon: Oh.
Rubeus: So long suckers!
*There's a crackling noise that comes from behind the air-conditioning vent and then all is silent. *
Moon: Who does he think he is calling us suckers?
Chibi-Moon: SUCKERS, WHERE?!?!?!
Mercury: No where, Chibs.
Chibi-Moon: Waaaaaaaaaa! I wanted a sucker!
Everyone: Oy.
Chapter 5
Narrator: Well, everyone went back home after their first encounter with the new generals. They're all tired from a hard days work and plan to go to bed. The next day is a Sunday, lucky them and everyone is out and about. Serena is out Darien on a lovely date, Amy is visiting Greg at his sick bed, and Raye is sweeping the porch in front of her temple. Lita and Mina are watching a movie starring their favorite comedian, Adam Sandler. Haruka and Michiru are at the park um; having a little fun shall we say? Reeny is at home causing mayhem and Hotaru to, is busy causing yet more mayhem at her home with yet the third blown fuse in a month. Setsuna is hanging out at the Time Gate for fun (when ya gotta get away, ya gotta get away), and Luna and Artemis are duking it out at Central Control. Now that everyone is cleared, on with the show!
Serena: (Dreamily) oh Daaaahrrien.
Darien: (Thinking) who am I? Why does she love me so much? How come I have to be so much older than her? What could possibly possess her to wear the same hairstyle day after day? Why do my bangs stick out so far? I think I need a haircut. Why don't I, let alone anyone else in this world have ACNE? Why can't I fall for anyone my own age? Who am I...?
Serena: Darien?
Darien: Huh?
Serena: Are you, like, okay?
Darien: Never better.
Serena: You just spaced off there that's all.
Darien: That's because I was too busy thinking about you, that's all sweetie.
Serena: Oh muffin...
Darien: (Thinking) who am I again?
Meanwhile...
Amy: Hey there, how are you feeling?
Greg: (Throaty) like an amoeba in the premarital soup.
Amy: Oh poor thing. How was the food that I brought you?
Greg: Very good, thanks for scraping some up for me.
Amy: No problem.
Greg: After a while chicken noodle soup starts to taste like chalk.
Amy: I know the feeling.
Greg: I'd kiss you, but I'm afraid that I'd give you my germs.
Amy: (Giggling) that's okay. Maybe some other time.
Greg: Yea.
Meanwhile...
Raye: *Sweep **sweep **sweep *, there, finally finished.
Reeny: WHEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!
Raye: AAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY BEAUTIFLY SWEPT FLOOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reeny: Huh?
Raye: YOU LITTLE BRAT, WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA CLOMPING AROUND HERE IN YOUR GRIMY, DISGUSTING, MUDDY, DIRTY, DOG-DOO'D, BUG-GUTTY, GUM-STICKY, LITTLE SHOES?!?!?!?!?!?
Reeny: Um, I was bored of causing pure mayhem at home?
Raye: WHY?!?!?!?!
Reeny: Because everyone there is used to it and they don't care?
Raye: GET LOST YA LITTLE BRAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reeny: Can't make me! Remember, I the heir to the Earth throne!
Raye: I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE THE HEIR TO THE UNIVERSAL THRONE, GET OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reeny: Meanie!
Raye: @#$%^&L*J#@$(tm)(c)^*(r)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reeny: AMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Raye: (Trying very hard to surpress her anger) mmmmmmm...
Reeny: Wow I've never seen anyone turn that shade of red before.
Raye: Get...out...or...else...
Reeny: Fine, fine, fine, I'm going, I'm going, sheesh what a grouch!
Meanwhile...
Lita: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Mina: He he he he he!
Lita: (Trying to stop laughing) *kch * that was *kch * hilarious!
Mina: (Laughing uncontrollably)
yeayeaandwhatabouthepartwhereRobbyfindsoutthatJulia'slastnamewillbeGulia?
Lita: I didn't understand a word you just said.
Mina: WhatdoyameanLita?
Lita: Put spaces between your words!
Mina: Um, um, okay.
Lita: Better, now, what were you just saying?
Mina: I said *insert deep breath here * yea, yea, and what about the part where Robby finds out that Julia's last name will be Gulia?
Lita: Oh, yea that was a hoot!
Mina: *Kch **kch * HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lita: Breathe Mina.
Mina: (Taking a deep breath) uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Lita: Good.
Meanwhile...
Haruka: Michiru...
Michiru: Haruka...
Haruka: Michiru...
Michiru: Haruka...
Haruka: Oh my darling, I can't take it any longer!
Michiru: Neither can I!
Haruka: Let's go!
Michiru: I don't think I can hold it much longer!
Haruka: There it is!
Michiru: I get dibs on the first open stall!
Haruka: Oh no you don't, I've been holding it in for an hour!
Michiru: Aaaaaaaaa! I think I'm gonna pee in my pants!
Haruka: Made it!
*Two bathroom stall doors slam shut. *
Haruka: Oooooooooohhhhhhhhhh!
Michiru: This is bliss...
Meanwhile...
Prof. Tomoe: NOT AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hotaru: Whoops.
Prof. Tomoe: HOTARU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hotaru: I am so dead...
Meanwhile...
Setsuna: I loved relaxing to the sound of a clock ticking.
Clock: *Tick **tick **tick *
Setsuna: Hmmm...
Clock: *Tick **tick **tick *
Setsuna: ...
Clock: *Tick **tick **tick *
Setsuna: Okay that's enough of listening to the clock.
Meanwhile...
Luna: No way tuna-breath!
Artemis: Yes way fish-face!
Luna: No way pickle-brain!
Artemis: Yes way fur-tushie!
Luna: There is no way on the face of this Earth that any of the Sailor Scouts would turn on us at any time!
Artemis: What about Uranus and Neptune? They are mighty suspicious to me!
Luna: Why?
Artemis: Because! I mean, aren't they, like, hopelessly in love with each other and would turn on us if it meant being together forever, and even if it were in heck?
Luna: No!
Artemis: Yes!
Luna: No!
Artemis: Yes!
Narrator: Um, okay so that's the end of this part! The world is once again safe from the forces of evil thanks to the Sailor Scouts!
The End?
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