here are the previous entries for the rolyplay blog of heero, if you want faster updates please proceed to: http://heero-yui.diaryland.com/ . or if you are interested in reading other characters blog or interested in applying for a character pleas go to: http://www.crash-down.org/gundam/ . thanks so much for your time. leave comments on the blog, please? and thank you to all you have commented! it means so much! take care!
[ note: if you feel i am vague in some parts, its intentional! lol sometimes Heero is just as clueless into what is occurring as you are. still have that desire to know all? i implore you to read the other characters blogs! heh heh ]
10/04/AC 197 [ difficult ]
again, not there. among a million the same. it is difficult not to feel a little bit disappointed and passed over. acrimony constantly consuming my detachment, my escape becoming an enslavement, to the tugging a beat to the sight of you lying. this day at school no one dared to question my trail of absences, or duo whereabouts. no attempts to edify my behavior or attendance apparently nothing, i am nothing at all. before they had no concern to my existence, now they purposely avoid it or exploit it for their amusement. sometimes staring on in disapproval, yet not daring the risk in mouthing it. but some are more bold.
"heero, i'll excuse you from today's assigment. " my plain english teacher stated. to me and the class. up to that time, the majority of the period i had to endure through the pathetic endeavors of my peers, that they had to recite before the class. bland and grotesque. i looked up at her.
"i will do it." i objected. she looked up from the syllabus she was checking off from the previous student. the class discerned on our conversation.
"but you surely haven't prepared anything to say." she protested.
"it does not matter." i said rising from my desk, and proceeding to weave though the adolescents between my desk and the front of the room. trying to pay no heed to their barrage of offensive assessment. i stood erect behind the podium. their attention servile. i cleared my throat. resting my right forearm on the provided platform. i spoke austerely, perhaps even insipid. the words voluminous, about to crest. my lips parted.
"we are in the building where they make us grow. and i am frightened by the liquid engineers. like you." i publicized, slowly. dwelling on each syllable. "my memory is sure to fail. i could crawl around the floor just like i'm real. like you." i droned on, my eyes never averting the provincial forum. "the sound of metal. i want to be you. i should learn to be a man, like you." the woman instructor, lifting her eyes. fixated, upon me. "plug me in and turn me on. oh everything is moving." speaking dispassionate as ever. mocking murmers. "picture this if i should make the change. i would love to pull the wires from the wall. did you?" myself, conspicuous. too exposed. too incongruous. biased closing in. "and who are you and how can i try ?" ephemeral silence.
"freak!" some male derided. an uproar of laughter. so jarring, it echoed in my head, sound amplified drastically. the woman tried censure, to scold them for their reprehensible actions. the ridicule silencing, but shinning through their sardonic grins. i faced my heckler. directing my whole body. i was solemn, unperturbed. did i see disappointment flash in his eyes.
"idiot." i repudiated. his hypocritical fanatics, mustering their amused snorts. the tyrant's reign momentarily overthrown. i took my seat, uncaring. the period ended. i collected my few possessions, and indolently reached the exit. i passed through the hall, entangled in the mass of bodies. an unexpected force from behind, sent my body careening, into the lockers face first. impact engendering a metallic thwang. i turned slowly, a flicker of pain. he had his fists balled, elbows angled. i threw down my books before my feet. a scream, a rush of feet. we were surrounded. he stood there, waiting for me to commence my counterattack. "are you going to finish what you started." i taunted.
"you queer!" he yelled before his fist made an upper cut, implanting his knuckles into my right cheek. i stumbled back moderately. then i reclaimed those two steps, brushing the back of my left hand across my inflamed cheek, assessing the damage. i burst into laughter and as straighten my back, facing him, apathetic.
"try harder, try again." i stated with a grin plastered on my redden face. the blood beginning to collect at the corner on my mouth. he glared at me, stupefied. adminstrators ran in-between us. i managed to collect my possessions before they herded me into the office. i spent of the rest of the day there. out of boredom, sitting in that excuse for a chair. i would not let anyone touch me, the blood dried down on to my chin. out of boredom, i shuffled through my papers, something was amiss. my search became more frantic. it dawned on me, my thief. i left, unpermitted.
my pace was more rushed, i wanted nothing more to forgot this day. this unneeded pain. before my threshold, i looked back to the sidewalk. and stepped in. everything temporarily pacified. it was a home. new objects filled old spaces. i had shed my text books and binder. and walked around, attempting to establish a comfort level, and a realization this was infact the place where i reside in. everything i had ordered, in place and already catered for. someone even placed my books with in the shelves. i grew numb, i sat in the middle of the living room floor. peaking my knees, leaning my head upon their caps. it was two hours later, before i found the sign sheet left by the delivery company. it read duo maxwell's signature.
commence [ 11:43 p.m. ]
[ note: if you feel i am vague in some parts, its intentional! lol sometimes Heero is just as clueless into what is occurring as you are. still have that desire to know all? i implore you to read the other characters blogs! heh heh ]
10/04/AC 197 [ difficult ]
again, not there. among a million the same. it is difficult not to feel a little bit disappointed and passed over. acrimony constantly consuming my detachment, my escape becoming an enslavement, to the tugging a beat to the sight of you lying. this day at school no one dared to question my trail of absences, or duo whereabouts. no attempts to edify my behavior or attendance apparently nothing, i am nothing at all. before they had no concern to my existence, now they purposely avoid it or exploit it for their amusement. sometimes staring on in disapproval, yet not daring the risk in mouthing it. but some are more bold.
"heero, i'll excuse you from today's assigment. " my plain english teacher stated. to me and the class. up to that time, the majority of the period i had to endure through the pathetic endeavors of my peers, that they had to recite before the class. bland and grotesque. i looked up at her.
"i will do it." i objected. she looked up from the syllabus she was checking off from the previous student. the class discerned on our conversation.
"but you surely haven't prepared anything to say." she protested.
"it does not matter." i said rising from my desk, and proceeding to weave though the adolescents between my desk and the front of the room. trying to pay no heed to their barrage of offensive assessment. i stood erect behind the podium. their attention servile. i cleared my throat. resting my right forearm on the provided platform. i spoke austerely, perhaps even insipid. the words voluminous, about to crest. my lips parted.
"we are in the building where they make us grow. and i am frightened by the liquid engineers. like you." i publicized, slowly. dwelling on each syllable. "my memory is sure to fail. i could crawl around the floor just like i'm real. like you." i droned on, my eyes never averting the provincial forum. "the sound of metal. i want to be you. i should learn to be a man, like you." the woman instructor, lifting her eyes. fixated, upon me. "plug me in and turn me on. oh everything is moving." speaking dispassionate as ever. mocking murmers. "picture this if i should make the change. i would love to pull the wires from the wall. did you?" myself, conspicuous. too exposed. too incongruous. biased closing in. "and who are you and how can i try ?" ephemeral silence.
"freak!" some male derided. an uproar of laughter. so jarring, it echoed in my head, sound amplified drastically. the woman tried censure, to scold them for their reprehensible actions. the ridicule silencing, but shinning through their sardonic grins. i faced my heckler. directing my whole body. i was solemn, unperturbed. did i see disappointment flash in his eyes.
"idiot." i repudiated. his hypocritical fanatics, mustering their amused snorts. the tyrant's reign momentarily overthrown. i took my seat, uncaring. the period ended. i collected my few possessions, and indolently reached the exit. i passed through the hall, entangled in the mass of bodies. an unexpected force from behind, sent my body careening, into the lockers face first. impact engendering a metallic thwang. i turned slowly, a flicker of pain. he had his fists balled, elbows angled. i threw down my books before my feet. a scream, a rush of feet. we were surrounded. he stood there, waiting for me to commence my counterattack. "are you going to finish what you started." i taunted.
"you queer!" he yelled before his fist made an upper cut, implanting his knuckles into my right cheek. i stumbled back moderately. then i reclaimed those two steps, brushing the back of my left hand across my inflamed cheek, assessing the damage. i burst into laughter and as straighten my back, facing him, apathetic.
"try harder, try again." i stated with a grin plastered on my redden face. the blood beginning to collect at the corner on my mouth. he glared at me, stupefied. adminstrators ran in-between us. i managed to collect my possessions before they herded me into the office. i spent of the rest of the day there. out of boredom, sitting in that excuse for a chair. i would not let anyone touch me, the blood dried down on to my chin. out of boredom, i shuffled through my papers, something was amiss. my search became more frantic. it dawned on me, my thief. i left, unpermitted.
my pace was more rushed, i wanted nothing more to forgot this day. this unneeded pain. before my threshold, i looked back to the sidewalk. and stepped in. everything temporarily pacified. it was a home. new objects filled old spaces. i had shed my text books and binder. and walked around, attempting to establish a comfort level, and a realization this was infact the place where i reside in. everything i had ordered, in place and already catered for. someone even placed my books with in the shelves. i grew numb, i sat in the middle of the living room floor. peaking my knees, leaning my head upon their caps. it was two hours later, before i found the sign sheet left by the delivery company. it read duo maxwell's signature.
commence [ 11:43 p.m. ]