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10/25/AC 197 [ assuagement ]

i woke to warmth, not warmth derived from cloth nor electric facility, warmth radiating from flesh, a human embrace. swathed in his rapture, betoken by his lissome frame. i refined my vision, his body twined with mine, snarled, our convergence shrouded in the comforter, incubating stodgy ardor. disarrayed on the floor. dry contentment, the imposed taut of my dorsum, twinge of pain residing on the tissue of my ear, ignominious throe, could not tarnish this sullen providential inclination. i barred my forearm around his torso, nudging duo closer. his head already at the crook of my shoulder, now lightly pressing on my face, his inert lips smudging my cheek. my shallow breaths spoke his name, consumed by reverie entirely contaminated by his emanation. the room swelling with miasma. his lips parted, tracing my buccal, murmurs, incoherent, brooding with melancholy. a mouth's dilatorily motions, grazing my cheek. was this the consequence of my jonah? i summoned my hand to his face, smoothing my thumb over his trembling lips, conservatively. i obtained no merit to absorb these fragments. coaxing the cease of his indistinct continuous whispers. saliva residue lining his lips, swabbing on to my finger tips. i meticulously rendered my torso vertical, inclining my back against the wall. his head tumbled from its perch on my shoulder, yielding to my new position, delicately nestling on my chest. i felt his arms contract around my waist. i lolled my head against the wall, bringing my finger tips to my mouth, still coated with his spittle. i smeared the saliva over my lips.

minutes lapsed. he was stirring, gently roused from slumber. he directed his gaze briefly upon me, my surveillance had not altered with his states of consciousness. he applied his lightly balled fists to each of his eye socket's thwarting the hold of sleep, proceeding to slide his open palm over his lips. i subtly raised my brow, wielding awing expression, contorting my features. his face went lax, as he placed his head on my torso again, becoming idle. my hand went to stroke strains of hair free from tress, as my fingertips brushed the locks they abruptly curled, my hand recoiled. he was unaware, i knew i should not touch him. i thinly urged my upper body forward, pushing against gently, he understood and complied. rasing his body, standing. as he walked away his hands glided down his oversized shirt, smoothing out any wrinkles of fabric, elongating the material screen of his body, ending at mid thigh. heightening my cognizance of his slender naked legs, as they made stride to the bathroom. hoisting my weight to burden my feet. i amassed the blanket in my hands, tossing upon the bed, as i reached for the pillow my stance wavered. blood lacing the cotton, dried burgundy. i scooped it up, grip indenting the cushion before heaving it at the mattress. pausing to assess the situation. i simply acted, not even bothering to me to mentally declare i would postpone the analysis. i determined my attire for the day, applying bias to a number of possible alternatives concealed in his closet. selection made, with the addition of removing a clean pair of boxers from his drawer. stripping the scanty garments already occupying my form, eyes fixed on the gap of wall were a closed bathroom door should be stationed. lethargic in cladding my raw profile. vain attempts to evoke an impose another mischance.

fully clothed, i deterred from taking stance in the cavity of his room. wanting to allow him privacy. foot falls flux, penetrating the living room. eyes snared on the listless female form on the couch. the apartment gleaming in its inability of attainment of all our embodiments. i retreated to the door. confronting my own incapacity to entirely detach myself from his association. i traced the sidewalk, viewing his stagnate vehicle, inserting my body into the passenger seat. remaining in expectation of his arrival. i was apprehensive, my arm raised, fingers adjacent, i slid my hand between the car's ceiling and the provided sun visor, lowering it. revealing a dust coated mirror. peering at my ear, blood compact, crusty mass attached to the piercing. crestfallen. in the reflection i saw his legs, again. this time edging their way to the car. i quickly pressed the visor close. and became motionless as he entered. i directed my sight downcast, the engine ignited, the only sound was the mechanical drone of the automobile's inner workings. words would falter to atone.

vested in that educational establishment, our silence was sustained. i apprehended my inherent actuality, irrevocable dependency to him, clutching on to the punctured lobe. erroneous was our integrity, derived from serendipity, flaws manifested, originated from the same source. neglected of mend. i partook in this experience, short in duration, the taste still lingers. i have glimpsed what we could be, and i like it. i do not know if we could ever reach such a point, but i am willing to attempt. is this relationship capable of restoration? what am i saying. have we ever functioned accordingly? would you accept this fraudulent man? am i a man? or a boy. does the blood on my hands achieve masculinity? maturity? is that a whole other division of my mental disturbances, ailments afflicting my counterfeit emotions. is my damaged psyche obstructing us? i am sorry.

my elbows were propped on the desk, hands clasped, cradling my chin. i exhaled audibly, long deep stentorian breath passing through my mouth ajar. even through eyes half lidded i fully observed duo trying to discreetly regard me. i was obliged, i offered a feeble somber smile. his glance lingered, his head veered, bestowing his attention to our geometry instructor. a quarter of an hour later, the bell sounded. i tarried in class room, in till the teacher and myself were the only inhabitants. maneuvering through the impregnate corridor, i exited. sight uncensored, immediately scanning the parking lot, searching to see if his vehicle was still present. he was leaning against the side, chest pressed against the driver's side window glass, arms extending the car's roof. in a state of abeyance, our eyes locked. his stance stiffen upright, my ambulation carried me to that car, somewhat forced.

the vehicle stalled in my apartment complex's concrete span, intended for indolent motored modes of transportation. i lurched my body forward, removing my physical configuration from the car's bowels. to my surprise the engine hushed, and i heard him motion behind me, trailing my footsteps.

exasperated i flung my frame on the couch, situating my arm's angle on the material clad arm of the sofa, pressing my palm, with finger folded over, to my forehead. disconsolated. i witnessed the door close, and duo slip from view. i scantily perceived his toiling beyond my range of sight. i could not will myself to investigate. a flow of time. the overhead light ceased illumination. a light tread of bare feet against the hard wood floor. the couch's cushioned arm succumbed to duo's weight inclining on it. i angled my head, but the lack of light impaired my sight, i could not distinguish anything, except the obscure outline of his profile. he wove his arm around my back, adjoining our bodies. his fingertips skimming the contour of my shoulder, i went taut, bone rigid. overly lifting my chin, angling my head up. his fingers fully expanded, his palm curved, gliding down my chest. he verged closer, breath imposing on the side of my face. his hand exerted, steady weight on my opposing cheek, firmly securing my head's disposition. his liberal strains of hair hinged with my scalp. his moist lingua slid over my ear, my breath was stifled. my hands formed fists, as his tongue coiled around the bloodied piecing. exquisite rack seared my nerves, i winced.

"that hurts." urgently informed, intonation still dry. his reaction was delayed. finally parting, still hosting an intimate proximity.

"do you want me to stop?" a blithesome inquiry. he was fully aware he existed in position of advantage.

"no." i muttered, defeated. i closed my eyes, my visionary sense was already dulled. he commenced osculation on my neck, voluptuously slow. parting, and pushing the tissue lining his mouth. his glossa protruded, slithering over the fleshy folds surrounding his oral cavity. smearing this damp muscular organ over my taut cervix. i slanted my head back, exposing more carnal substance, my pose more incumbent to his entity. my hand snaked up behind his caput, securing at the nape of his neck, coercing onward, attempting to entrap him. he steered away, breaking our taction. suddenly i was assaulted with the conception that i committed a fault. the room was opaque, sound of a feet stepping, covering distance. the extent of space between the couch and the bedroom. i rose from the mass of furniture, earnest desirous strides. conveying to environ him once more.

bedchamber was benighted, i could not disambiguate duo amongst the shadows. i stood under the door frame, endlessly gazing in nocturnal prime. sudden mirth expelled, i still was unable to locate his stance. i timorous stepped in the room, trying to compass him in my arms, perhaps just to touch him. flutter of movement, tactual sensation, an insubstantial trace, ephemeral against my skin. i swiped my arm, only ensnaring a void of air. "won't find me over there."

i pivoted, confronting the source of the strain of words. wrong again. he had already resettled. i perceived his body beyond my back. before i could even motion to turn, his arms wove under my axillas. he reduced his mentum on to the slope of my shoulder, tilting his lower jaw as his digit covertly coasted the interval separation of the sides of the shirt, buttons lining the center of my chest. the tip of his finger persuaded each button's liberation. he brought his hand up, spreading the shirt open wide, his knuckles tracing down my bare chest. he grasped on to my shoulder constricting his grip before peeling my shirt back. discarding it, the garment was soon fostered by the floor. he eased back, my hands went rapidly docile, fumbling to unlatch my belt. as i struggled to tug my pants zipper down, i noticed my vie to disrobe was unmatched. i affixed on his silhouette, benumbed. had i been excessively assumptive, again? my trousers were already encircling my ankles. i gaped at him, extending my hand, a sutble gesticulation. he understood what i was trying to convey. stifled snickers.

"how do you know i'm not?" he was naked. i observed his bare chest before, my eyes slid down to his crotch, the darkness concealing, my desire devouring. i heard the mattress shift with his weight as his boxer shorts fell from my waist. i sojourned, exposed, pleading, lacking confidence. i could not move. the bed creaked, the rows of coil springs contained in the box spring compacting. he enwrapped is arms around the prominence of my pelvis. i was lurched forward, careening descend, the slap of our raw flesh. my body cradled in nude form, full exposure of the body, mutual with my own. in our tousle. his arms squeezed my torso. "hi." he spoke, soft speech produced without full voice, rich lacquered tone. lacking the faculty of articulation, i lunged forward, exerting my mouth to his, roughly conferring a kiss. ravaging his lips, preying on a buss voraciously. he made his inner mouth accessible, i did the same, slanting my head, our glossas overlapping. i clasped his hand with my own, ramming it into the head board, carnal bondage. i besmeared my parted mouth down his cervix, down, on his clavicle. he arched his back, frame suspended from the mattress momentarily. i complied. i receded, rolling off his figure. leering at him intently. he shifted his weight on his knees, crawling to the foot of the bed, lethargically dragging his body over the sheets. he urged me on my back, ascending my legs, straddling on my mid thigh. his anatomy brushing my inner leg, between knee and hip.

a hand gingerly clutched the stem of my partially erect penis. his other hand secured on my hip. i quivered, as he lowered, his locks sweeping over my lower abdomen. there was a pause, i lifted my head desperately searching the dark for his face. his mouth shourded my member, my body convusled. his continuous spiralingly, friction engendering. his tongue whorled around my phallus. i amassed the sheets in my hand, intermittent pules escaping my trembling lips. the blood filling my organ, his oral cavity harboring my rigid erection. i was enable to subdue my continual motions, tempestuous fidgeting. it was imminent. i lifted by chest, he batted me back down. my face contorted. the sensitivity was heightening. i reached for him, my arm fell limp. i had ejaculated, his mouth brimming in my semen. swallowing sensation. he had ingested it. duo raised his head, my penis slid from his lips, coated. i gaped aimlessly at the ceiling, the mattress swayed. he had positioned himself above me, hovering, palms flat, indenting the bed under my shoulders. i shifted my sight, refining on his features, eyes widen, fully observant. a smirk tugging the corners of his mouth.

my arms jutted up, entangling his waist, forcing him down. i imposed another fervent kiss, lips laced with seminal fluid. i nudged him on to his back, he was acquiescent. his form crowning my own, i twined my arms around his midsection, spooning him. clasping my hands. burying my face into his neck, i separated my lips, mouth sealing tender flesh, slight suction. vehement groping, applying pressure to his nipples as my hand glided over his chest, screening in sweat, downward. feeling the tonicity of his abdomen, his gaut. muscles tightening. i inhaled sharply, as my fingers grazed over the tuft of his pubic hair. my other hand clutching his side, forearm locked over his stomach. blindly caressing his genitals. my fingers enveloping this organ, cupped hand coasting. onanist manually conducting. his body twitched, i prompted the stimulation expeditiously. relishing in his garbled whimpering, his member expanding. my mouth engrossed with his neck. his frame stiffen, head lolling back, falling off my shoulder. i saw his teeth piercing his lower lip. he discharged in my hand.

our bodies still heaving, synchronized. i removed my hand, stationing it off to the side, contracting my fingers, smearing the mucilaginous content over my palm. toying with it. his weight was eliminated from my form. i angled my head, abruptly confronted with his lax features. his arms interlaced my chest, legs entangling. adhere to my body. he smiled before gracefully lurching forward, kissing my forehead. lenient inclination open to your complication. "duo." i timidly elucidated. i lidded my eyes. snugly positioning my head against his, exerting my arm beneath him, lifting it, draping it over his side. he pulled the bedding over our bodies.



commence. [ 11:31 p.m. ]