One- My Secret
"Momma."
"Yes, Jillian? What is it now?"
"Momma... I think I might be pregnant."
My momma dropped the gold-plated vanity mirror, and looked at me, sharply.
"This is no time for messing around. What is it you REALLY want?"
"Momma, I mean it! It's true..."
She looked me, full on, both of her blue eyes gazing into my identical blue ones. "Jillian, you had better not be mocking me. Are you telling the truth?"
"Yes." I stared down at the floor, ashamed, my cheeks burning. Perhaps I shouldn't have told her this way? Maybe I should have written it in a letter, like I wanted to all along. But my conscience had got the better of me, and I knew that it wasn't right for me to take the cowards way out. And so I had told her, face to face. But now she was just staring at me. Staring, like I was a stranger.
Then, she broke the silence.
"Get out." She murmured. "I do not wish to shout at you, or slap you Jillian. It would be wrong of me. So leave my presence now, before something regretable happens."
"But momma..."
"Now, Jillian."
A hot tear trickled down my cheek. I span about and almost ran from momma's suite of rooms, and into my own. There, I flung myself onto my bed and let the tears come. After about half an hour, I fell into a deeply troubled sleep. Two hours later, I was awoken by a knocking on my bedroom door.
"Come in." I sleepily called. It was Lilly, one of the maids.
"Your father is home. And he wishes to see you now, in his study." She left again.
I shakily stood up, and looked at myself in the mirror. I ran a brush through my tousled hair. I looked down at my stomach. Soon, there would be a bump, and I would lose the slim figure that every teenage girl wants. I knew I was pretty. Everyone told me that, even father, and I was certain he hated me. He loved my sisters more. Because they were clever, and took after him. They were both plain though. Momma told me that I took after her- I had the looks. She used to tell me looks could get a woman everywhere. Well, momma, look where they have got me now. Look at the trouble I'm in.
I left my bedroom, and went downstairs, and nervously tapped on the door of my father's study. I had to admit to myself that it was through sheer fear of father that I was shaking, and not just because of recent events which had made me upset.
"Enter." Father's deep voice boomed. I opened the door and walked into the room, shutting the door behind me, as father always requested I do. However this time, I stood as close to the door as possible, ready to run away from my father if need be.
"You're not... scared... are you?" Father asked me, sarcastically.
I half shook my head, even though I was visibly trembling.
"Well, you needn't even open your mouth, Jillian. Your mother has already told me everything. The only reason you need to speak from now on, is to keep on apologising profoundly for the shame and embarassment you have caused this family. Got it?"
"Yes."
"Yes WHAT?" My father almost exploded with rage.
"Yes father."
"We shall find a solution to your little problem in due time. But for now, keep out of my sight, and out of everyone else's too, for that matter. You can leave now."
I turned and left father's study, slamming the door behind me. How DARE he treat me like that! I needed help! I needed to talk about it. But so far, nobody had given me the chance to say what had really happened. I couldn't talk to momma. I certainly couldn't talk to father. My sisters both hated me and thought me inferior to them. And now I had finally proved them right...
"Momma."
"Yes, Jillian? What is it now?"
"Momma... I think I might be pregnant."
My momma dropped the gold-plated vanity mirror, and looked at me, sharply.
"This is no time for messing around. What is it you REALLY want?"
"Momma, I mean it! It's true..."
She looked me, full on, both of her blue eyes gazing into my identical blue ones. "Jillian, you had better not be mocking me. Are you telling the truth?"
"Yes." I stared down at the floor, ashamed, my cheeks burning. Perhaps I shouldn't have told her this way? Maybe I should have written it in a letter, like I wanted to all along. But my conscience had got the better of me, and I knew that it wasn't right for me to take the cowards way out. And so I had told her, face to face. But now she was just staring at me. Staring, like I was a stranger.
Then, she broke the silence.
"Get out." She murmured. "I do not wish to shout at you, or slap you Jillian. It would be wrong of me. So leave my presence now, before something regretable happens."
"But momma..."
"Now, Jillian."
A hot tear trickled down my cheek. I span about and almost ran from momma's suite of rooms, and into my own. There, I flung myself onto my bed and let the tears come. After about half an hour, I fell into a deeply troubled sleep. Two hours later, I was awoken by a knocking on my bedroom door.
"Come in." I sleepily called. It was Lilly, one of the maids.
"Your father is home. And he wishes to see you now, in his study." She left again.
I shakily stood up, and looked at myself in the mirror. I ran a brush through my tousled hair. I looked down at my stomach. Soon, there would be a bump, and I would lose the slim figure that every teenage girl wants. I knew I was pretty. Everyone told me that, even father, and I was certain he hated me. He loved my sisters more. Because they were clever, and took after him. They were both plain though. Momma told me that I took after her- I had the looks. She used to tell me looks could get a woman everywhere. Well, momma, look where they have got me now. Look at the trouble I'm in.
I left my bedroom, and went downstairs, and nervously tapped on the door of my father's study. I had to admit to myself that it was through sheer fear of father that I was shaking, and not just because of recent events which had made me upset.
"Enter." Father's deep voice boomed. I opened the door and walked into the room, shutting the door behind me, as father always requested I do. However this time, I stood as close to the door as possible, ready to run away from my father if need be.
"You're not... scared... are you?" Father asked me, sarcastically.
I half shook my head, even though I was visibly trembling.
"Well, you needn't even open your mouth, Jillian. Your mother has already told me everything. The only reason you need to speak from now on, is to keep on apologising profoundly for the shame and embarassment you have caused this family. Got it?"
"Yes."
"Yes WHAT?" My father almost exploded with rage.
"Yes father."
"We shall find a solution to your little problem in due time. But for now, keep out of my sight, and out of everyone else's too, for that matter. You can leave now."
I turned and left father's study, slamming the door behind me. How DARE he treat me like that! I needed help! I needed to talk about it. But so far, nobody had given me the chance to say what had really happened. I couldn't talk to momma. I certainly couldn't talk to father. My sisters both hated me and thought me inferior to them. And now I had finally proved them right...