Three- Revelations
When I awoke the next morning, I had already decided not to leave my bedroom. Momme came upstairs first thing in the morning, to tell me that my personal tutor would not be coming in that day.
"Why not?" I had asked her.
"Because we need to prepare for lunch. Your father is coming home from the office early, and both your sisters will be here too. By the way, they are both very annoyed that I had to cancel the tutor."
I bet they were, I thought. My two sisters and I had lessons together each morning, and finished late afternoon. They just loved to show me up infront of him. Just because they were more intelligent than me... it wasn't fair!
Momma had paused for a while, as if deep in thought. She snapped back to reality suddenely, as she remembered what she had come to my bedroom for.
"We need to pick you out something nice to wear, Jillian. Something becoming." She looked at me, softly, motherly love appearing in her eyes. Something I seldom saw. "Mind you," she added, "a girl like you needn't dress up to look good. You're beautiful Jillian. Truly beautiful. It's a shame you spoilt your innocence, or you could have really been something."
She quickly moved across to one of my wardrobes, and started looking through it. I am sure she did it just to break the silence. As for me, I didn't know what to say either. I just sat in the chair at my dressing table, and watched my momma trying to select a dress for me. I glanced at myself in the mirror. My blue eyes seemed wide, with innocence and lack of knowledge about the world. My blonde hair curled around my shoulders, and the light from the table lamp shone off it, giving it a glimmer that made it look as though I had a halo. I laughed, inspite of myself. I was hardly the most angelic being there was. I knew far too much about the world for a girl of my age. I was almost eighteen. An unmarried pregnancy at eighteen in that day, for my class of person was almost unheard of. I was rich. I had the 'Boston blood' which my father boasted of. Yet if this scandal got out, I knew friends would disown us, and my father's business would plummet.
I was a failure. I had ruined everything for my family.
"How about this one?" Momma held up a scarlet dress that I had only worn on one ocassion before.
"I guess so."
"Come on Jillian, your future is at stake here. Show a little more interest. I liked this dress on you. It brought out the colour in your eyes."
"Momma... what's going on? Why do I need to dress so?"
"Your father made me promise not to tell you. So I'm afraid you will have to wait and see."
"PLEASE momma..."
"Alright then. Your father has invited someone around for lunch. A young man. His name is Cleave Vanvoreen, he is twenty-four years old. He's a young business man. In the ocean liner business. His father has recently passed away, and he is now in charge, and apparantly, he has already expanded the income from the liners by almost 30%. A real up and comer."
At first I wasn't sure why momma was telling me all this. Why did she think I would want to know about one of father's business associates? Then it hit me.
"Are you trying to marry me off?"
"Well, what else can we do? Can't you see what you have done to this family, Jillian? If we find you a husband, this problem will sort itself out, otherwise we stand to lose everything!"
I didn't know what to say. So I didn't say anything. Marriage at such an early age in Boston wasn't unheard of, even among the higher classes.
But what was this Cleave like?
When I awoke the next morning, I had already decided not to leave my bedroom. Momme came upstairs first thing in the morning, to tell me that my personal tutor would not be coming in that day.
"Why not?" I had asked her.
"Because we need to prepare for lunch. Your father is coming home from the office early, and both your sisters will be here too. By the way, they are both very annoyed that I had to cancel the tutor."
I bet they were, I thought. My two sisters and I had lessons together each morning, and finished late afternoon. They just loved to show me up infront of him. Just because they were more intelligent than me... it wasn't fair!
Momma had paused for a while, as if deep in thought. She snapped back to reality suddenely, as she remembered what she had come to my bedroom for.
"We need to pick you out something nice to wear, Jillian. Something becoming." She looked at me, softly, motherly love appearing in her eyes. Something I seldom saw. "Mind you," she added, "a girl like you needn't dress up to look good. You're beautiful Jillian. Truly beautiful. It's a shame you spoilt your innocence, or you could have really been something."
She quickly moved across to one of my wardrobes, and started looking through it. I am sure she did it just to break the silence. As for me, I didn't know what to say either. I just sat in the chair at my dressing table, and watched my momma trying to select a dress for me. I glanced at myself in the mirror. My blue eyes seemed wide, with innocence and lack of knowledge about the world. My blonde hair curled around my shoulders, and the light from the table lamp shone off it, giving it a glimmer that made it look as though I had a halo. I laughed, inspite of myself. I was hardly the most angelic being there was. I knew far too much about the world for a girl of my age. I was almost eighteen. An unmarried pregnancy at eighteen in that day, for my class of person was almost unheard of. I was rich. I had the 'Boston blood' which my father boasted of. Yet if this scandal got out, I knew friends would disown us, and my father's business would plummet.
I was a failure. I had ruined everything for my family.
"How about this one?" Momma held up a scarlet dress that I had only worn on one ocassion before.
"I guess so."
"Come on Jillian, your future is at stake here. Show a little more interest. I liked this dress on you. It brought out the colour in your eyes."
"Momma... what's going on? Why do I need to dress so?"
"Your father made me promise not to tell you. So I'm afraid you will have to wait and see."
"PLEASE momma..."
"Alright then. Your father has invited someone around for lunch. A young man. His name is Cleave Vanvoreen, he is twenty-four years old. He's a young business man. In the ocean liner business. His father has recently passed away, and he is now in charge, and apparantly, he has already expanded the income from the liners by almost 30%. A real up and comer."
At first I wasn't sure why momma was telling me all this. Why did she think I would want to know about one of father's business associates? Then it hit me.
"Are you trying to marry me off?"
"Well, what else can we do? Can't you see what you have done to this family, Jillian? If we find you a husband, this problem will sort itself out, otherwise we stand to lose everything!"
I didn't know what to say. So I didn't say anything. Marriage at such an early age in Boston wasn't unheard of, even among the higher classes.
But what was this Cleave like?