Thoughts of a fallen knight
This story is in Seifer's POV.
Disclaimer: Final Fantasy 8 and all characters mentioned are the property of Squaresoft except Andy, he is mine.
My name is Seifer Almasy and I am a fallen Knight.
Right now I'm sitting in a bar in Deling city, drinking a glass of coke. No, I'm not like those losers who actually drink, because I think that if you do, you really have fallen into a low point. I'll never let myself end up like that.
I wonder what they're all doing? Of course I never see any of them, but that isn't surprising after what I put them through.
I always tried to show everyone that I could be better than Squall, but the truth is he was always better than me. When I became the Sorceress's Knight I thought I could beat Squall then, but he kept beating me. I'm just a loser, if Squall was the Sorceress's Knight and I was the one who had to fight him, Ultimecia would actually have won.
Why did I do what I did? I could say it was because of Ultimecia brainwashing me, but the truth is, I don't know why I did any of that. But I can honestly say that, thanks to her I can recognise all those things inside of me and ignore them. I guess I've become a better person because of what happened, but it's too late now, there is no way they will forgive me for what I have done to them.
Rinoa, I threw her in front of Adel. Quistis, she always had faith in me and I let her down. Selphie, I had her home Garden almost completely destroyed and some of her friends had died there. Zell, I always made fun of him and made his life a living hell. Irvine, he was exiled from Galbadia for life because he fought against them. Squall, I had him tortured and I scarred him. Raijin and Fujin, because I didn't listen to them they don't bother with me anymore. I really am on my own now.
I hear someone say "new blood" which means some new people have shown up and Andy, the bar owner, welcome's them and shows them to some seats.
Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever see them again, but if I do it won't be on purpose only by accident. I wonder what they're doing now, part of me just wants to find them and say sorry for everything I've done to them but will they listen? No they won't because I don't deserve any forgiveness from them. What time is it? 12:10! I've been sitting here for six hours! Huh, I guess when you think a lot you don't notice time go by. I say goodbye to Andy and get up to go. I never saw those new people, not that it matters just idle interest I guess. Normally people hire SeeD to do a job, but this town doesn't have much money so because I've had training, if there's any trouble with monsters or that sort of thing I usually take care of it and I get paid some money for it. I said I'd do it for free but they insisted so, what am I going to do about it. I just got back to my apartment which isn't very big, but it's fine for me. I walk in and take my trenchcoat off and lie on my bed and listen to the news on the radio. Nothing interesting except that there's a new Garden in Esthar.
As I lie here I wonder if this is really what I'm going to do for the rest of my life, just go and kill monsters, get some money, stay in the bar then come back to this apartment of mine. is that really what I want? No. I'm going to do something with my life. I get up and gather my stuff which consists of some X-potions and my Hyperion, and I walk out of my apartment and into the street. It's time I stopped feeling sorry for myself and start to do something worthwhile, I don't know what but I'm going to find something and work for it.
As I walk to the exit of Deling city I look up at the stars and promise to myself to never look back.
This story is in Seifer's POV.
Disclaimer: Final Fantasy 8 and all characters mentioned are the property of Squaresoft except Andy, he is mine.
My name is Seifer Almasy and I am a fallen Knight.
Right now I'm sitting in a bar in Deling city, drinking a glass of coke. No, I'm not like those losers who actually drink, because I think that if you do, you really have fallen into a low point. I'll never let myself end up like that.
I wonder what they're all doing? Of course I never see any of them, but that isn't surprising after what I put them through.
I always tried to show everyone that I could be better than Squall, but the truth is he was always better than me. When I became the Sorceress's Knight I thought I could beat Squall then, but he kept beating me. I'm just a loser, if Squall was the Sorceress's Knight and I was the one who had to fight him, Ultimecia would actually have won.
Why did I do what I did? I could say it was because of Ultimecia brainwashing me, but the truth is, I don't know why I did any of that. But I can honestly say that, thanks to her I can recognise all those things inside of me and ignore them. I guess I've become a better person because of what happened, but it's too late now, there is no way they will forgive me for what I have done to them.
Rinoa, I threw her in front of Adel. Quistis, she always had faith in me and I let her down. Selphie, I had her home Garden almost completely destroyed and some of her friends had died there. Zell, I always made fun of him and made his life a living hell. Irvine, he was exiled from Galbadia for life because he fought against them. Squall, I had him tortured and I scarred him. Raijin and Fujin, because I didn't listen to them they don't bother with me anymore. I really am on my own now.
I hear someone say "new blood" which means some new people have shown up and Andy, the bar owner, welcome's them and shows them to some seats.
Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever see them again, but if I do it won't be on purpose only by accident. I wonder what they're doing now, part of me just wants to find them and say sorry for everything I've done to them but will they listen? No they won't because I don't deserve any forgiveness from them. What time is it? 12:10! I've been sitting here for six hours! Huh, I guess when you think a lot you don't notice time go by. I say goodbye to Andy and get up to go. I never saw those new people, not that it matters just idle interest I guess. Normally people hire SeeD to do a job, but this town doesn't have much money so because I've had training, if there's any trouble with monsters or that sort of thing I usually take care of it and I get paid some money for it. I said I'd do it for free but they insisted so, what am I going to do about it. I just got back to my apartment which isn't very big, but it's fine for me. I walk in and take my trenchcoat off and lie on my bed and listen to the news on the radio. Nothing interesting except that there's a new Garden in Esthar.
As I lie here I wonder if this is really what I'm going to do for the rest of my life, just go and kill monsters, get some money, stay in the bar then come back to this apartment of mine. is that really what I want? No. I'm going to do something with my life. I get up and gather my stuff which consists of some X-potions and my Hyperion, and I walk out of my apartment and into the street. It's time I stopped feeling sorry for myself and start to do something worthwhile, I don't know what but I'm going to find something and work for it.
As I walk to the exit of Deling city I look up at the stars and promise to myself to never look back.