This chapter sort of becomes a little bit of a lecture in a way. Lots of 'don't do this' and 'don't do that' but hey, that's life. The next chapter will be really short and a bit dark, but it's open for change. Let me know what you want to happen and if enough people say they want the same thing then I'll try and work it in.
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I'm sure you have a lot of questions," John said as he took a seat on the couch, "but I want you to hear me out first. I know I was never there for you, and I know how hard it must have been for you. I want to make up for all that, though."
"It's kind of late to start playing catch up. Did you find out you have some disease and you'll be dead in a week or something? Let me guess, you couldn't just go without having one last heart-to-heart with me?" Jess spat out angrily.
"In a way, I did have a disease before but I'm cured now," the man looked Jess in the eyes, "For the longest time I was addicted to cocaine. Your mom and I always drank quite a bit, and one day I started to do drugs. The first time I tried cocaine I was hooked. Liz never did anything like that. If anything she sobered up a bit after seeing what our lifestyle was causing." John shook his head sadly, "I'm not proud of what I've done in the past and I know I owe you an apology."
Jess glared, "Okay, nothing new yet."
"I wish I could tell you that I left so you wouldn't have to watch me ruin my life. I wish I could say I left so you could have a good role model. I wish I could say those things but I promised myself that for once I'd say the truth. It's hard to k eep a steady job when your always high. Drugs are expensive, and so is raising a family. One day I got a paycheck and sat down to think. I really meant to pay the rent, buy groceries and all those things the money really should have gone to, but I didn't. I went out and got high. Liz was mad, of course, but she had some money of her own put away so we survived. Finally one day Liz told me I had to chose between her or the addiction."
"Let me take a guess which was more important to you." Jess muttered sarcastically.
The man suddenly seemed empty, "I packed up and left, I didn't think I needed Liz or you. I felt you were holding me back from great things. Really I was the one hurting myself. You and Liz were the only things that kept me from going to rock bottom. I lived on the streets for a few years. Let me say, when you're my age and living on the streets doing anything in your power to score your next hit, it's not cool."
"Hey, I could've told you that." Jess responded. He couldn't figure out how hearing this was supposed to help. His father just said that he left because he didn't care about his family and would rather not be around them.
"There was a 16 year old kid out there. He was an addict, like me. I remember that he kept thinking bugs were crawling all over him, so he kept scratching. Finally he scratched all the way down to the bone." The man shuddered at the memory, "One day he over-dosed and died. At the time it wasn't a big deal because that happened far too often. What did change was when a buddy of mine was killed. He owed money to a bunch of people but couldn't pay them back. I held him while he died. After that I realized that if I didn't start getting my act together then the same thing would happen to me. The next day I left the streets forever and got help. It's been a bumpy road ever since but I've done it. Every day is a struggle, but I know now that I can survive without drugs in my life. I'm clean now." The man smiled brightly as if the last three words were the sweetest sound to his ears.
"So where do I fit into this? How come you decided to come now and welcome me back into your life?'
"I started to remember that kid on the streets. Suddenly I was afraid that you would end up the same way. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if you died because of my bad influence. I called Liz, and at first she wouldn't talk to me. Finally we started to talk and she mentioned that you've been in a lot of trouble lately. You've done damage to other peoples properties, you've stolen from people and you've been so bad that she had to send you away. She really does want what's best for you."
"Well, Liz does tend to over-react quite a bit." Jess replied, feeling ashamed for making his mother worry about him.
"She cares, you know. So do I. I decided to come and offer you a choice. You can come and live with me. Learn from my mistakes. You can go back to your old school, be with your old friends. Best of all, you and I will be able to catch up on lost times."
"How long have you been clean?" Jess asked.
"What kind of a question..." John began
"How long?" Jess repeated, "remember, you promised you wouldn't lie anymore."
"I left the streets eight years ago." The man replied under his breath.
"So it took you eight years to find out if I was even around anymore or not. What if you had been too late and I ended up being a failure, just like you? You say you want to be in my life but you never wanted it before. How do I know you're not just going to run off again?"
John stood up quickly, "Do you have any idea how hard this has been for me? To come here and tell you all of this stuff about my past? All of the stupid things that I've done? That's got to say something about the kind of person I am!"
Jess remained silent and John sat back down, "Liz said your not happy here. You want to go home. Here's your chance, come back with me and leave this crazy town behind." John's eyes met Jess', "Please come back."
Jess stood up and ran his fingers through his hair. It was true. This town wasn't his home. He only had one friend and he wasn't even sure if they would ever become anything more. For all he knew she could just be messing with him. "Alright, I'll think about it."