Author's note: Again, thank you all so much for the wonderful reviews…it
makes my day when I come in here and read what everyone thinks of my work.
And I want to apologize for this update taking so long. I started a new job
and lets just say that it takes up a lot of my time – my first day I worked
almost 12 hours straight! It's crazy! Anyways, on with the story!
As time went on, we grew closer and closer. We tried to have a "movie night" at least once a week. I was really enjoying spending time with you and getting to know you even better than Fred probably did. We had some really long, intimate conversations, something I'm not used to with anyone. I was finally able to completely open up to you about everything, including my childhood, and it felt really good to have someone that I care for so much reflect those feelings back at me. I've never felt that before. And I remember one night Ty and Alex stopped by and I was telling all this to Ty and he just looked at me with this stupid grin on his face.
"Uh-oh," he snickered.
"What?"
"I think you already know."
"Know what? What are you talking about?"
"Never mind. It's nothing."
"No come on. What?"
"It's just…"
"What?"
"The way you talk about her."
"So? What about it?"
"Oh come on Bosco. It's obvious man."
"Well it can't be that obvious if I have no idea what you're talking about."
"Please. You can tell me."
"Tell you what?!? Davis, what the hell are you talking about?!?"
"Bosco…you're in love with her."
"With Faith? Oh come on man, she's my best friend and everything…"
"Yeah, that's not all she is."
"Hey! Don't you talk about Yokas that way. Besides, I'm not in love with her."
"Right."
"I'm serious!"
"Ok man. Whatever you say."
I was convinced that Davis had lost it. I mean, I love you and everything Faith, but I'm not in love with you. I kept telling myself that, but the more I denied it, the harder it was to do so. Maybe…no. Not possible. But I couldn't stop thinking about it. What if?
Anyway, like I said, we had grown very close. So close in fact that I was able to pick up on the fact that your condition was steadily continuing to deteriorate. There were just some small little things that you tried to hide from me, but I knew better. There was nothing that you could hide from me anymore. You realized this eventually and had to swallow your pride as the doctor increased your dosage of painkillers. The drugs that you had been taking as a final vain attempt to fight the disease had long been abandoned and replaced with drugs to help ease your physical pain, which was becoming almost unbearable. I could see it every time you moved. The slow, stiff movements that once came so easy to you were now a struggle. I wish I could've taken it all away, but there was nothing I could do except be there.
Then one morning about a week before Christmas, I was making breakfast when I heard a thud. I ran to the bedroom to find you on the floor at the foot of your bed. The pain had finally become too much for you to bear and you collapsed. I put you back in bed and called the your doctor. He sent an ambulance over to put in an IV so you could receive a steady dose of painkillers. He came by later that night to check on you, and as he left he said the most horrifying thing to me.
"It won't be long now. I'm sorry."
I was too stunned to say anything. As he let himself out, I just stood there. Somewhere deep inside of me I knew you didn't have much time left, but it was all brought to my immediate attention with those words. I had to force myself to finally enter the bedroom and face you. I prepared myself to be strong before I did enter so I could comfort you. But I didn't have to. Even with your IV, the dark circles under your eyes, and the pillows helping you sit up, you looked like you were at peace. Almost like you were relieved to hear that you didn't have to fight much longer. And while I can't blame you, I couldn't and didn't want to believe it either. As I walked towards you, I could feel the tears rising inside me. You gave a sympathetic smile and I completely broke down. I collapsed into your open arms and just held on to you, hoping to will it all away. With each tear that fell, I wanted to wash away all the pain. But it was no use. It hurt more than anything. We just sat there clinging to each other for a long, long time, eventually succumbing to exhaustion.
When I awoke the next morning, you were sound asleep beside me, your head on my chest. I lay there for about an hour just holding you. It was so soothing to hear your breathing in and out, feeling the rise and fall of your chest next to mine along with the steady, rhythmic beating of your heart and your soft, warm skin touching mine. It was the most wonderful feeling I've ever felt. So much peace; a calm, contented peace. And as my mind wandered, I came back to the conversation that I had with Ty about us. I had been thinking about it a lot lately, and laying there with you I realized he was right. I was in love with you. I was hopelessly and madly in love with you Faith. And it was a little scary and amazing all at once, just like you.
Fred brought the kids over later that day. I had called him to tell him what the doctor had said, so he stayed to visit with you too. I was hard for all of them, so they didn't stay long, but they came back every day to see you and watch your condition decline rapidly before their eyes. It was hard, but they always came with a smile and a hug, and I honestly believe that it helped.
On Christmas Eve, Fred, Emily, and Charlie came over for dinner, which had to be held in the bedroom because you could no longer get out of bed, even with my help. It was just too painful and too stressful for you body to handle. Your family didn't stay long that night both because you were in such bad shape and needed your rest, and because they were coming back the following morning to spend Christmas with you.
After they left, I cleaned up and came to lay with you like I did every night now. You were already asleep when I came in though, so I very quietly pulled a chair up to sit with you. You looked like an angel lying there, I swear. So beautiful, so strong, and so brave. I brushed a strand of hair out of your face and gently stroked your cheek. Then for some reason, I just started talking.
"Oh Faith. We've had our share of ups and downs over the years, now haven't we? But it always seems like we have more downs. I don't know why that is. I mean, you're certainly not a bad person, so why do you keep getting dealt all this bull? You deserved so much more out of life than you got. But you were always thankful for what you had and you were always thinking about everyone else. Like me. I don't know how I got so lucky to have someone like you in my life, but I'm so glad I did. You were my saving grace. My guardian angel. My best friend Faith. And somewhere I always knew you were important to me. You were special. But it took me this long to realize just how special." I paused to look up at you and saw that your eyes were open.
"Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you.:
"You didn't." Your reply was so weak, you sounded like a small child.
"How much did you hear?"
"All of it."
"No, you didn't. I have one more thing to say."
"What?" you whispered.
Here goes nothing.
"Faith, I'm in love with you. And I have been for a while. I just realized it too late and I'm sorry."
Our eyes met and you smiled.
"It's not too late Boz if you get to tell me. And I have always loved you too, but as my life is taken from me, I have fallen in love with you as well. I love everything about you, and I especially love the way you love me."
"Wait, you knew?"
"I hoped."
"I love you Faith."
"I love you Bosco."
My heart leapt. You loved me too! I couldn't wait any longer. I leaned down to you. Our lips touched as we shared our first kiss. The most incredible sensation radiated throughout me, my senses tingling. This was real love. Real pure love, something I had never truly experienced. You had once again given me the opportunity to experience something absolutely amazing. Something that I had never experienced before. I broke away to look at you, but your eyes stayed closed. I gave you a gentle nudge.
"Faith? Faith?"
*Only one more chapter to go….
As time went on, we grew closer and closer. We tried to have a "movie night" at least once a week. I was really enjoying spending time with you and getting to know you even better than Fred probably did. We had some really long, intimate conversations, something I'm not used to with anyone. I was finally able to completely open up to you about everything, including my childhood, and it felt really good to have someone that I care for so much reflect those feelings back at me. I've never felt that before. And I remember one night Ty and Alex stopped by and I was telling all this to Ty and he just looked at me with this stupid grin on his face.
"Uh-oh," he snickered.
"What?"
"I think you already know."
"Know what? What are you talking about?"
"Never mind. It's nothing."
"No come on. What?"
"It's just…"
"What?"
"The way you talk about her."
"So? What about it?"
"Oh come on Bosco. It's obvious man."
"Well it can't be that obvious if I have no idea what you're talking about."
"Please. You can tell me."
"Tell you what?!? Davis, what the hell are you talking about?!?"
"Bosco…you're in love with her."
"With Faith? Oh come on man, she's my best friend and everything…"
"Yeah, that's not all she is."
"Hey! Don't you talk about Yokas that way. Besides, I'm not in love with her."
"Right."
"I'm serious!"
"Ok man. Whatever you say."
I was convinced that Davis had lost it. I mean, I love you and everything Faith, but I'm not in love with you. I kept telling myself that, but the more I denied it, the harder it was to do so. Maybe…no. Not possible. But I couldn't stop thinking about it. What if?
Anyway, like I said, we had grown very close. So close in fact that I was able to pick up on the fact that your condition was steadily continuing to deteriorate. There were just some small little things that you tried to hide from me, but I knew better. There was nothing that you could hide from me anymore. You realized this eventually and had to swallow your pride as the doctor increased your dosage of painkillers. The drugs that you had been taking as a final vain attempt to fight the disease had long been abandoned and replaced with drugs to help ease your physical pain, which was becoming almost unbearable. I could see it every time you moved. The slow, stiff movements that once came so easy to you were now a struggle. I wish I could've taken it all away, but there was nothing I could do except be there.
Then one morning about a week before Christmas, I was making breakfast when I heard a thud. I ran to the bedroom to find you on the floor at the foot of your bed. The pain had finally become too much for you to bear and you collapsed. I put you back in bed and called the your doctor. He sent an ambulance over to put in an IV so you could receive a steady dose of painkillers. He came by later that night to check on you, and as he left he said the most horrifying thing to me.
"It won't be long now. I'm sorry."
I was too stunned to say anything. As he let himself out, I just stood there. Somewhere deep inside of me I knew you didn't have much time left, but it was all brought to my immediate attention with those words. I had to force myself to finally enter the bedroom and face you. I prepared myself to be strong before I did enter so I could comfort you. But I didn't have to. Even with your IV, the dark circles under your eyes, and the pillows helping you sit up, you looked like you were at peace. Almost like you were relieved to hear that you didn't have to fight much longer. And while I can't blame you, I couldn't and didn't want to believe it either. As I walked towards you, I could feel the tears rising inside me. You gave a sympathetic smile and I completely broke down. I collapsed into your open arms and just held on to you, hoping to will it all away. With each tear that fell, I wanted to wash away all the pain. But it was no use. It hurt more than anything. We just sat there clinging to each other for a long, long time, eventually succumbing to exhaustion.
When I awoke the next morning, you were sound asleep beside me, your head on my chest. I lay there for about an hour just holding you. It was so soothing to hear your breathing in and out, feeling the rise and fall of your chest next to mine along with the steady, rhythmic beating of your heart and your soft, warm skin touching mine. It was the most wonderful feeling I've ever felt. So much peace; a calm, contented peace. And as my mind wandered, I came back to the conversation that I had with Ty about us. I had been thinking about it a lot lately, and laying there with you I realized he was right. I was in love with you. I was hopelessly and madly in love with you Faith. And it was a little scary and amazing all at once, just like you.
Fred brought the kids over later that day. I had called him to tell him what the doctor had said, so he stayed to visit with you too. I was hard for all of them, so they didn't stay long, but they came back every day to see you and watch your condition decline rapidly before their eyes. It was hard, but they always came with a smile and a hug, and I honestly believe that it helped.
On Christmas Eve, Fred, Emily, and Charlie came over for dinner, which had to be held in the bedroom because you could no longer get out of bed, even with my help. It was just too painful and too stressful for you body to handle. Your family didn't stay long that night both because you were in such bad shape and needed your rest, and because they were coming back the following morning to spend Christmas with you.
After they left, I cleaned up and came to lay with you like I did every night now. You were already asleep when I came in though, so I very quietly pulled a chair up to sit with you. You looked like an angel lying there, I swear. So beautiful, so strong, and so brave. I brushed a strand of hair out of your face and gently stroked your cheek. Then for some reason, I just started talking.
"Oh Faith. We've had our share of ups and downs over the years, now haven't we? But it always seems like we have more downs. I don't know why that is. I mean, you're certainly not a bad person, so why do you keep getting dealt all this bull? You deserved so much more out of life than you got. But you were always thankful for what you had and you were always thinking about everyone else. Like me. I don't know how I got so lucky to have someone like you in my life, but I'm so glad I did. You were my saving grace. My guardian angel. My best friend Faith. And somewhere I always knew you were important to me. You were special. But it took me this long to realize just how special." I paused to look up at you and saw that your eyes were open.
"Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you.:
"You didn't." Your reply was so weak, you sounded like a small child.
"How much did you hear?"
"All of it."
"No, you didn't. I have one more thing to say."
"What?" you whispered.
Here goes nothing.
"Faith, I'm in love with you. And I have been for a while. I just realized it too late and I'm sorry."
Our eyes met and you smiled.
"It's not too late Boz if you get to tell me. And I have always loved you too, but as my life is taken from me, I have fallen in love with you as well. I love everything about you, and I especially love the way you love me."
"Wait, you knew?"
"I hoped."
"I love you Faith."
"I love you Bosco."
My heart leapt. You loved me too! I couldn't wait any longer. I leaned down to you. Our lips touched as we shared our first kiss. The most incredible sensation radiated throughout me, my senses tingling. This was real love. Real pure love, something I had never truly experienced. You had once again given me the opportunity to experience something absolutely amazing. Something that I had never experienced before. I broke away to look at you, but your eyes stayed closed. I gave you a gentle nudge.
"Faith? Faith?"
*Only one more chapter to go….