I sit upon my window ledge, looking out over the angry seas. It seems that
the winter's cold has also frozen my heart, for when I think of you I feel
nothing. It is a blank, empty, nothing. It is almost as though the
knowledge that you and I are done is a mere thought that was swept away on
the chilly breeze that steals warmth from my body. It is growing hard to
write with my frozen hands, but I cannot tell whether they are frozen from
the chilling weather or from the coldness of my heart. It seems as though
losing you made me lose myself.
Lily put down her quill, and looked at her journal. "It sounds like a bad romance novel," she muttered. However, she couldn't deny how she felt. It was her essence, and to deny her essence was to deny herself. It was ironic, that she was so against denying herself, when she already felt as though she was lost when she lost him. Him.
James Potter.
Her Hogwarts sweetheart. Her only boyfriend ever. Her first crush. Her first love. Her first loss.
She had gotten the news that cold, gray morning, when the owl had come chasing after her as she laughingly darted around the rocks and boulders that made up this part of the coastland in Wales. It was immediately after she had read the letter that the day ceased to be real. She had fervently hoped that this was just a bad dream, a horrible nightmare that she would wake up from cold and sweating, but writing to James would make her realize the stupidity of her worry.
It wasn't just a bad dream, a horrible nightmare. It was the sharp, unrelenting coldness of reality that bit at her, scratched at her soul until she almost cried out loud in pain.
She got up from the window ledge, and closed the window as though she hoped to shut out the world in the same action.
Walking down the stairs, Lily told herself that it was a lie, that it wasn't true. It couldn't be true! She wouldn't believe it!
Today, December 27th, two days after she had last seen his laughing face!
James Potter couldn't be dead!
**************************************************************************** **
December 24th 5 years later.
Lily woke up from her bed, and went downstairs. She sighed, walking over to the kitchen, preparing to make herself a light breakfast before going to work. Lily didn't look happy, and she hadn't looked happy for a long time. Such a long time, in fact, that it had been almost 5 years since anyone had ever seen a smile on her face. 5 years.
It was so sad, Lily thought, that Aurors were needed to often these days. Lily was an Auror, and some said that she was the best Auror. To date, she had brought in 10 Death Eaters, and she had never once failed to catch one. It often took her moths, once almost a year, before she could gather significant evidence and proof to take them down. But she always did.
After about 15 minutes, Lily Apparated out of her home on the coast of Wales, and Disapparated into her office at the Ministry of Magic. Settling down at her desk at 7:30, she looked at her inbox to see what her next assignment was. It was rather empty today, with only two letters in it.
One was a letter from her friend Arabella Figg, inviting her to a party that she and Sirius were throwing on Christmas.
The other was her next assignment: to find out the loyalties of one Lucius Malfoy. Lily knew what was implied: if he is a Death Eater get the proof and bring him in. There was a note at the bottom of the letter. Lily almost groaned out loud; working with Severus Snape! Lily didn't trust Snape. Dumbledore thought that he was trustworthy, and true, he had never been wring to date, but Lily still couldn't shake off the feeling of doubt that she had.
Before reading over Malfoy's record, she glanced at the calendar, and immediately wished that she hadn't. It was December 24th, three days away from the 5 year anniversary of James's disappearance. Everyone else referred to it as the day of his death but Lily knew that they were wrong. She knew it!
Noticing some unusual things in Malfoy's record, she Apparated over to the Leaky Cauldron to talk to the bartender. Tom had been helpful before.
A few minutes after Lily left, a cloaked figure appeared asking to speak with a "Miss Evans". After being informed that the inquired was out, the figure left, muttering. The only words that could be heard were: "5 years".
a/n: so , whaddaya think? good? bad? kill myself? i dunno, so tell me what u guys think. oh, and shameless plug-ins, go read y other fics!!! u know u wanna!!
anyhoozles, thanx for reading, now review!!!
Lily put down her quill, and looked at her journal. "It sounds like a bad romance novel," she muttered. However, she couldn't deny how she felt. It was her essence, and to deny her essence was to deny herself. It was ironic, that she was so against denying herself, when she already felt as though she was lost when she lost him. Him.
James Potter.
Her Hogwarts sweetheart. Her only boyfriend ever. Her first crush. Her first love. Her first loss.
She had gotten the news that cold, gray morning, when the owl had come chasing after her as she laughingly darted around the rocks and boulders that made up this part of the coastland in Wales. It was immediately after she had read the letter that the day ceased to be real. She had fervently hoped that this was just a bad dream, a horrible nightmare that she would wake up from cold and sweating, but writing to James would make her realize the stupidity of her worry.
It wasn't just a bad dream, a horrible nightmare. It was the sharp, unrelenting coldness of reality that bit at her, scratched at her soul until she almost cried out loud in pain.
She got up from the window ledge, and closed the window as though she hoped to shut out the world in the same action.
Walking down the stairs, Lily told herself that it was a lie, that it wasn't true. It couldn't be true! She wouldn't believe it!
Today, December 27th, two days after she had last seen his laughing face!
James Potter couldn't be dead!
**************************************************************************** **
December 24th 5 years later.
Lily woke up from her bed, and went downstairs. She sighed, walking over to the kitchen, preparing to make herself a light breakfast before going to work. Lily didn't look happy, and she hadn't looked happy for a long time. Such a long time, in fact, that it had been almost 5 years since anyone had ever seen a smile on her face. 5 years.
It was so sad, Lily thought, that Aurors were needed to often these days. Lily was an Auror, and some said that she was the best Auror. To date, she had brought in 10 Death Eaters, and she had never once failed to catch one. It often took her moths, once almost a year, before she could gather significant evidence and proof to take them down. But she always did.
After about 15 minutes, Lily Apparated out of her home on the coast of Wales, and Disapparated into her office at the Ministry of Magic. Settling down at her desk at 7:30, she looked at her inbox to see what her next assignment was. It was rather empty today, with only two letters in it.
One was a letter from her friend Arabella Figg, inviting her to a party that she and Sirius were throwing on Christmas.
The other was her next assignment: to find out the loyalties of one Lucius Malfoy. Lily knew what was implied: if he is a Death Eater get the proof and bring him in. There was a note at the bottom of the letter. Lily almost groaned out loud; working with Severus Snape! Lily didn't trust Snape. Dumbledore thought that he was trustworthy, and true, he had never been wring to date, but Lily still couldn't shake off the feeling of doubt that she had.
Before reading over Malfoy's record, she glanced at the calendar, and immediately wished that she hadn't. It was December 24th, three days away from the 5 year anniversary of James's disappearance. Everyone else referred to it as the day of his death but Lily knew that they were wrong. She knew it!
Noticing some unusual things in Malfoy's record, she Apparated over to the Leaky Cauldron to talk to the bartender. Tom had been helpful before.
A few minutes after Lily left, a cloaked figure appeared asking to speak with a "Miss Evans". After being informed that the inquired was out, the figure left, muttering. The only words that could be heard were: "5 years".
a/n: so , whaddaya think? good? bad? kill myself? i dunno, so tell me what u guys think. oh, and shameless plug-ins, go read y other fics!!! u know u wanna!!
anyhoozles, thanx for reading, now review!!!