~108 TOW Ross Is Homesick ~
(Joey walks inside the house with a bag over the top of his covering his hair. Rachel and Jenny are in the living room.)
Rachel: (Laughing.) What the hell is that?
Joey: Nothing. I have to go take a bath.
Rachel: Not until you tell me why you have (Starts laughing harder.) bag on top of your head.
Joey: Fine. In the episode I tape today I get a monkey for a pet.
Rachel: Wow! So did you get along with Marcel?
Joey: Yeah. It was fun working with him. Just was until the very end. He was on top of my head. And his handler has been feeding him are day.
Rachel: No. He took a crap on top of your head?
Joey: (Pulls the bag off. A bunch of crap is smear throughout his hair.) He sure did. (Both Rachel and Jenny laughs.) As you two can see I need to go wash my hair.
(Joey puts the bag back on and runs upstairs.)
~ Opening Credits ~
(Ross is sitting in a chair. He is in a pair of sweats and unshaved. There is a knock on the door.)
Ross: Come on in.
(Rachel walks in.)
Rachel: Oh look at you. It has been two weeks now. You need to get out and do something.
Ross: What? Pick another woman who going to break my heart.
Rachel: No you do not need to go pick up chicks. How about I take you out to dinner just you and I.
Ross: What about Joey?
Rachel: He has to get that smell out of his hair before I will go out with him in public.
Ross: Ok. But I get to choose the place.
Rachel: Anywhere you want, expect the Hard Rock Café.
Ross: But I really like the food. (He gives her puppy eyes.)
Rachel: Fine.
Ross: What else is going to happen to me?
(There is a knock on the door. Ross gets up and opens it. There is a cop standing at the door.)
Cop: Are you Ross Geller?
Ross: How many times do we have to go over this? I not the peeping tom you are looking for.
Cop: No not that. (Hands him a piece a paper.) You are being sued for sexual harassment.
(Joey is blow-drying his hair.)
Joey: Man it took me eight baths to get the smell of crap out. (Smells his hair.)
(Jenny starts to cry.)
Joey: Ok I coming.
(Joey heads out of the bathroom and into the nursery.)
Joey: What is the matter honey? (Picks her up. She points to the wall.) A mouse. Oh my god a mouse.
(Rachel walks into the house.)
Rachel: Honey I can hear you outside. Is there anything wrong?
(Joey walks out of the nursery carrying Jenny.)
Joey: You bet there is. There was a mouse in the nursery.
Rachel: Oh big deal. I saw one last week.
Joey: What! And you never told me?
Rachel: Calm down Joey. Are you going to war with them or something?
Joey: Yes I'm. So how was dinner with Ross? Is he ok?
Rachel: No. Now a student that tried to sleep with him is suing him for sexual harassment.
Joey: While he use to date one so I'm not.
Rachel: He did not do it, I think. Anyway he wants to go back to New York for Thanksgiving.
Joey: But we agreed not to go back for at least a year. That we would go cold turkey from New York.
Rachel: I know but I think it can help him right now.
Joey: Well ok. You buy the airplane tickets.
(Joey walks outside.)
Rachel: Where are you going?
Joey: To get my tools. It is war.
(Ross is knocking on an apartment door. Carol opens it.)
Carol: Oh how you doing?
Ross: Ok. So is Ben ready?
Carol: I think so. Hey Ben you dad is here.
(Ben runs into the living room.)
Ross: So why are you dress up?
Ben: I have a date tonight.
Ross: A date. Is she cute?
Ben: I'm not sure. It is a blind date.
Ross: (Laughing.) Ok Carol can you answer for yourself this time.
Carol: (Laughing.) Sorry it is a game Ben and I plan to cheer you up.
Ross: Well it was working until you said it was a plan.
Carol: (Hands a overnight bag to Ben.) So you being Ben home in the morning?
Ross: Yeah but not to early. I mean you date still might be going on.
Carol: Oh I doubt it.
(Joey is in the nursery. He has moved are the dresser from the wall.)
Joey: Ok there is the hole.
Jenny: (Who is in the crib.) Hole.
Joey: Yeah Jenny. What I'm going to do is gas them out with this gas. So we are going to have to hang out downstairs.
(Joey goes to pick up Jenny but she holds on to the crib.)
Jenny: No. Stay.
Joey: Come on Jenny. I have to kill the mouse.
Jenny: No kill. My friends.
Joey: They are your friends? Do not be crazy girl. (Joey picks her up. She starts crying.) Ok, ok. We come up with some solution.
(Ross and Ben are watching TV.)
Ben: Dad I telling you the truth. No one likes the learning station at school.
Ross: (Hears a knock at the door.) We finish this later son.
(He answers the door. Rachel is standing there.)
Rachel: I have a surprise for you.
Ross: What. Not another one of those songs written by Joey.
Rachel: No. Hey you did not like "It Will Be Ok"?
Ross: So what is it?
Rachel: Do you remember how you said you want to go back to New York for Thanksgiving?
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: Well I use my Vice President pull to get four first class tickets.
Ross: (Hugs here.) Oh thank you so much. But I figured you guys would not want to go back to Joey goes on break.
Rachel: Yeah but we are week. Plus we want to see baby Joey.
Ross: Thank you. I ready need this.
Rachel: So what you guys doing?
Ben: Another boring night watching the learning station.
(Rachel laughs.)
Ross: I do not get you guys. When I was young I would watch this all the time.
Rachel: And that why you got laid so much in high school.
(Rachel walks into the nursery and picks up Jenny.)
Rachel: Good morning honey. (She turns and sees a cage with a mouse in it.) Where it looks like Joey had a change of heart.
(Joey walks in.)
Joey: I see you like my solution.
Rachel: Why did you keep it? You were supposed to get rid of it.
Joey: But you said it was no big deal. And Jenny called it her friend.
Rachel: But it is a mouse. (She goes to take it out of the cage but Jenny starts crying.) Damn. She can have a pony right now if she wants.
Joey: So you can ride?
Rachel: Yeah.
The End ~109 TOW Thanksgiving In New York ~ coming after the break.
(Joey walks inside the house with a bag over the top of his covering his hair. Rachel and Jenny are in the living room.)
Rachel: (Laughing.) What the hell is that?
Joey: Nothing. I have to go take a bath.
Rachel: Not until you tell me why you have (Starts laughing harder.) bag on top of your head.
Joey: Fine. In the episode I tape today I get a monkey for a pet.
Rachel: Wow! So did you get along with Marcel?
Joey: Yeah. It was fun working with him. Just was until the very end. He was on top of my head. And his handler has been feeding him are day.
Rachel: No. He took a crap on top of your head?
Joey: (Pulls the bag off. A bunch of crap is smear throughout his hair.) He sure did. (Both Rachel and Jenny laughs.) As you two can see I need to go wash my hair.
(Joey puts the bag back on and runs upstairs.)
~ Opening Credits ~
(Ross is sitting in a chair. He is in a pair of sweats and unshaved. There is a knock on the door.)
Ross: Come on in.
(Rachel walks in.)
Rachel: Oh look at you. It has been two weeks now. You need to get out and do something.
Ross: What? Pick another woman who going to break my heart.
Rachel: No you do not need to go pick up chicks. How about I take you out to dinner just you and I.
Ross: What about Joey?
Rachel: He has to get that smell out of his hair before I will go out with him in public.
Ross: Ok. But I get to choose the place.
Rachel: Anywhere you want, expect the Hard Rock Café.
Ross: But I really like the food. (He gives her puppy eyes.)
Rachel: Fine.
Ross: What else is going to happen to me?
(There is a knock on the door. Ross gets up and opens it. There is a cop standing at the door.)
Cop: Are you Ross Geller?
Ross: How many times do we have to go over this? I not the peeping tom you are looking for.
Cop: No not that. (Hands him a piece a paper.) You are being sued for sexual harassment.
(Joey is blow-drying his hair.)
Joey: Man it took me eight baths to get the smell of crap out. (Smells his hair.)
(Jenny starts to cry.)
Joey: Ok I coming.
(Joey heads out of the bathroom and into the nursery.)
Joey: What is the matter honey? (Picks her up. She points to the wall.) A mouse. Oh my god a mouse.
(Rachel walks into the house.)
Rachel: Honey I can hear you outside. Is there anything wrong?
(Joey walks out of the nursery carrying Jenny.)
Joey: You bet there is. There was a mouse in the nursery.
Rachel: Oh big deal. I saw one last week.
Joey: What! And you never told me?
Rachel: Calm down Joey. Are you going to war with them or something?
Joey: Yes I'm. So how was dinner with Ross? Is he ok?
Rachel: No. Now a student that tried to sleep with him is suing him for sexual harassment.
Joey: While he use to date one so I'm not.
Rachel: He did not do it, I think. Anyway he wants to go back to New York for Thanksgiving.
Joey: But we agreed not to go back for at least a year. That we would go cold turkey from New York.
Rachel: I know but I think it can help him right now.
Joey: Well ok. You buy the airplane tickets.
(Joey walks outside.)
Rachel: Where are you going?
Joey: To get my tools. It is war.
(Ross is knocking on an apartment door. Carol opens it.)
Carol: Oh how you doing?
Ross: Ok. So is Ben ready?
Carol: I think so. Hey Ben you dad is here.
(Ben runs into the living room.)
Ross: So why are you dress up?
Ben: I have a date tonight.
Ross: A date. Is she cute?
Ben: I'm not sure. It is a blind date.
Ross: (Laughing.) Ok Carol can you answer for yourself this time.
Carol: (Laughing.) Sorry it is a game Ben and I plan to cheer you up.
Ross: Well it was working until you said it was a plan.
Carol: (Hands a overnight bag to Ben.) So you being Ben home in the morning?
Ross: Yeah but not to early. I mean you date still might be going on.
Carol: Oh I doubt it.
(Joey is in the nursery. He has moved are the dresser from the wall.)
Joey: Ok there is the hole.
Jenny: (Who is in the crib.) Hole.
Joey: Yeah Jenny. What I'm going to do is gas them out with this gas. So we are going to have to hang out downstairs.
(Joey goes to pick up Jenny but she holds on to the crib.)
Jenny: No. Stay.
Joey: Come on Jenny. I have to kill the mouse.
Jenny: No kill. My friends.
Joey: They are your friends? Do not be crazy girl. (Joey picks her up. She starts crying.) Ok, ok. We come up with some solution.
(Ross and Ben are watching TV.)
Ben: Dad I telling you the truth. No one likes the learning station at school.
Ross: (Hears a knock at the door.) We finish this later son.
(He answers the door. Rachel is standing there.)
Rachel: I have a surprise for you.
Ross: What. Not another one of those songs written by Joey.
Rachel: No. Hey you did not like "It Will Be Ok"?
Ross: So what is it?
Rachel: Do you remember how you said you want to go back to New York for Thanksgiving?
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: Well I use my Vice President pull to get four first class tickets.
Ross: (Hugs here.) Oh thank you so much. But I figured you guys would not want to go back to Joey goes on break.
Rachel: Yeah but we are week. Plus we want to see baby Joey.
Ross: Thank you. I ready need this.
Rachel: So what you guys doing?
Ben: Another boring night watching the learning station.
(Rachel laughs.)
Ross: I do not get you guys. When I was young I would watch this all the time.
Rachel: And that why you got laid so much in high school.
(Rachel walks into the nursery and picks up Jenny.)
Rachel: Good morning honey. (She turns and sees a cage with a mouse in it.) Where it looks like Joey had a change of heart.
(Joey walks in.)
Joey: I see you like my solution.
Rachel: Why did you keep it? You were supposed to get rid of it.
Joey: But you said it was no big deal. And Jenny called it her friend.
Rachel: But it is a mouse. (She goes to take it out of the cage but Jenny starts crying.) Damn. She can have a pony right now if she wants.
Joey: So you can ride?
Rachel: Yeah.
The End ~109 TOW Thanksgiving In New York ~ coming after the break.