~212 TOW The Uncomfortable Wedding~
(Everyone is at a nice restaurant for the pre wedding dinner.)
Rachel: Amy if you do not mine I would like to speak first.
Amy: Well I guess you have to do something before me.
Joey: Would you guys stop this already? It not like you was the only two to have the Joey Love.
Ross: You do you we can are hear you right?
Mom: Would someone speak already?
(Rachel stands up.)
Rachel: I don't have a big speech plan, so I will just say this. Paul if you break my Moms heart I will have you killed. (Everyone stares at her.)
Jill: What the hell?
Rachel: It was suppose to be a joke.
Jill: Oh thank god. That is my speech.
~Opening Credits~
(Rachel and Joey are making out in bed.)
Rachel: I'm sorry about being in such a bad mood lately. But you would understand if you found out I slept with one of your sister's years ago.
Joey: I'm do not believe I'm saying that I would find to women sleeping together bad but I guess I would. I mean it like you mom marrying an ex boyfriend of yours.
Rachel: (Stops kissing his neck.) Why the hell did you say that? (Gets out of bed.) You freak me out.
Joey: Where are you going?
Rachel: I cannot do it now.
Joey: Come on. You can think about Amy and I having sex if it helps.
(Ross walks out of kitchen late at night. Paul is watching TV.)
Ross: It is like two in the morning and you getting married in 12 hours for now. Should you be sleeping and getting rest for the big day.
Paul: Don't tell me when to sleep.
Ross: Are you getting cold feet about getting married?
Paul: A little. It is the age difference. I mean she is seven years older than me.
(Ross stares at him.)
Ross: Paul she is eleven. (Thinks for a second.) Months older than my mom.
Paul: I'm just afraid that she going die before me. I mean I already lost on wife and I do want to go through that again.
Ross: Have you talk to her about this?
Paul: God no. I do not want to freak her out.
Ross: But you are still going to marry her right?
Paul: Yeah, because I'm in love with her.
Ross: Then don't worry about it. Just enjoy the time you spend with her.
Paul: Oh you such a girl.
(Rachel, Amy, and Jill are waiting in a room.)
Rachel: Would you stop pacing around Jill?
Jill: I sorry but this weird. Mom is marrying someone who is not daddy.
Rachel: Does he even know about this?
Amy: Yeah. He seems not to be upset about it but you can tell he is.
Jill: He has been working on his boat a lot.
Amy: Even more than the time he caught you having sex on their bed.
Rachel: That was you he caught.
Amy: No way. I remember he caught two of us.
Rachel: Jill the next year.
Mom: (Walks through a side door in her dress.) You are three got caught. I think it was a club you are started.
Rachel: Oh the lets see who can have the most sex on Mom and Dad's bed.
Jill: Six times.
Amy: Only five.
Rachel: Eleven times. (Smiles.) I won. You are own me ten bucks.
Jill: You look great mom. (Kisses her on the cheek.)
Rachel: More importantly you look happy.
(Joey, Ross, and Paul are standing outside.)
Paul: So who is going to be my best man and who is going to walk her down aisle?
Joey: I'm going to walk her down the aisle. I mean I did kiss her once.
Paul: What? You kissed her?
Joey: It was not big deal. We were throwing two different.
Paul: I don't what details. It is bad enough my best man can image my daughter naked.
Ross: Yes I can. (Smiles.)
(Katie walks behind him.)
Katie: Oh are you imaging me naked again.
Ross: Yeah I'm Elizabeth. (Shakes his head.) I mean Katie.
Paul: Just do not screw up my wedding for me.
(Katie and Elizabeth are sitting in the hall. Paul is standing up front with the Minster. )
Katie: Are we the only two people sitting in the hall?
Elizabeth: I know. I mean I'm the only member of the Groom's family here at the wedding.
(Jenny walks down the aisle throwing flowers anyway including in her hair. Ross and the Green sisters walking down the aisle follow this. Jill is holding arms with Amy.)
Jill: Why can't I hold arms with Ross?
Ross: Because you still think I'm gay.
Jill: You turn me down for sex. I mean look at me.
Rachel: Would you two shut up?
Amy: Is it me or is this wedding really uncomfortable.
Ross: Yeah it is.
(Here comes the bride plays as Joey walks his Mother-In-Law down the aisle. Once he gets up front he walks over and stands by Ross.)
Joey: Man is this wedding really uncomfortable.
Ross: Yeah but they look so happy, so I guess that want counts.
(Later anyone is eating at a fancy restaurant.)
Rachel: (Stands up.) I will like to make a speech.
Jill: I cannot believe Rachel was picked to give the speech.
Amy: I can't believe you suggested that Joey choose who does it.
Ross: Do not be so hard on Jill. I mean how do she know he would pick his wife.
Rachel: Would anyone shut up so I can give the speech already? (Anyone looks scared.) I have to admit at when I first found out that Mom was getting married I was not thrilled. After all any wishes that they parents would be together.
Jill: Oh will you hurry up already?
Rachel: But after seeing her happy she is and given that she gave birth to things that all not possible human I guess it is ok that she married an ex- boyfriend of mines who is eleven years younger than her. (Her mom puts up seven figures.) And I guess seven months.
Joey: Great job honey. (He claps while anyone else stares.)
Amy: (Stands up.) You want a speech. I give you a speech.
(Ten minutes have passed. Anyone but Rachel is crying.)
Amy: Thank you.
Ross: That was the greatest speech ever.
(Everyone hugs Amy including Rachel.)
Rachel: I guess it was ok.
Elizabeth: Well I guess it would be pointless for me to give my speech after that.
Paul: Yeah honey.
Mom: Well I guess we better get going. Rachel we like to thank Joey and you for the limo and hotel suit for tonight.
Paul: And the honeymoon in Japan. Weird place for a honeymoon but we have never been there.
Joey: Japan was all Jill's idea.
(Later Rachel and Joey are watching TV.)
Rachel: Japan for a honeymoon. What was Jill thinking?
Joey: I do not know. I mean I brought them tickets for Hawaii but they went missing. So when I went back today to get new tickets it with all they had was Japan or Mexico City.
Rachel: How did you use plane tickets?
Joey: I do not know. I gave them to Amy.
(Amy and some dude are sitting a beach in Hawaii.)
Guy: Man Suzy this was great of you to take me to Hawaii. I have never been. It is so cool to meet another New Yorker in L.A like this.
Amy: But you will call me when we get back right Kevin?
Kevin: Of course I will. (His cell phone rings.) Hello? Can you hold on a second? Hey Suzy can you go give us a couple of sodas. This is a business call.
Amy: Ok.
(Amy walks away.)
Kevin: Oh hi sweetie. It is a topically business meeting. Well they reason why the hotel does not have a Jack Silver at the hotel is they like us to use fake names. What is my fake name? (Pulls the phone away from him.) Honey I can't hear you, just call me on my cell if you need anything.
The End ~213 TOW Ben's Broken Arm~ Coming Soon
(Everyone is at a nice restaurant for the pre wedding dinner.)
Rachel: Amy if you do not mine I would like to speak first.
Amy: Well I guess you have to do something before me.
Joey: Would you guys stop this already? It not like you was the only two to have the Joey Love.
Ross: You do you we can are hear you right?
Mom: Would someone speak already?
(Rachel stands up.)
Rachel: I don't have a big speech plan, so I will just say this. Paul if you break my Moms heart I will have you killed. (Everyone stares at her.)
Jill: What the hell?
Rachel: It was suppose to be a joke.
Jill: Oh thank god. That is my speech.
~Opening Credits~
(Rachel and Joey are making out in bed.)
Rachel: I'm sorry about being in such a bad mood lately. But you would understand if you found out I slept with one of your sister's years ago.
Joey: I'm do not believe I'm saying that I would find to women sleeping together bad but I guess I would. I mean it like you mom marrying an ex boyfriend of yours.
Rachel: (Stops kissing his neck.) Why the hell did you say that? (Gets out of bed.) You freak me out.
Joey: Where are you going?
Rachel: I cannot do it now.
Joey: Come on. You can think about Amy and I having sex if it helps.
(Ross walks out of kitchen late at night. Paul is watching TV.)
Ross: It is like two in the morning and you getting married in 12 hours for now. Should you be sleeping and getting rest for the big day.
Paul: Don't tell me when to sleep.
Ross: Are you getting cold feet about getting married?
Paul: A little. It is the age difference. I mean she is seven years older than me.
(Ross stares at him.)
Ross: Paul she is eleven. (Thinks for a second.) Months older than my mom.
Paul: I'm just afraid that she going die before me. I mean I already lost on wife and I do want to go through that again.
Ross: Have you talk to her about this?
Paul: God no. I do not want to freak her out.
Ross: But you are still going to marry her right?
Paul: Yeah, because I'm in love with her.
Ross: Then don't worry about it. Just enjoy the time you spend with her.
Paul: Oh you such a girl.
(Rachel, Amy, and Jill are waiting in a room.)
Rachel: Would you stop pacing around Jill?
Jill: I sorry but this weird. Mom is marrying someone who is not daddy.
Rachel: Does he even know about this?
Amy: Yeah. He seems not to be upset about it but you can tell he is.
Jill: He has been working on his boat a lot.
Amy: Even more than the time he caught you having sex on their bed.
Rachel: That was you he caught.
Amy: No way. I remember he caught two of us.
Rachel: Jill the next year.
Mom: (Walks through a side door in her dress.) You are three got caught. I think it was a club you are started.
Rachel: Oh the lets see who can have the most sex on Mom and Dad's bed.
Jill: Six times.
Amy: Only five.
Rachel: Eleven times. (Smiles.) I won. You are own me ten bucks.
Jill: You look great mom. (Kisses her on the cheek.)
Rachel: More importantly you look happy.
(Joey, Ross, and Paul are standing outside.)
Paul: So who is going to be my best man and who is going to walk her down aisle?
Joey: I'm going to walk her down the aisle. I mean I did kiss her once.
Paul: What? You kissed her?
Joey: It was not big deal. We were throwing two different.
Paul: I don't what details. It is bad enough my best man can image my daughter naked.
Ross: Yes I can. (Smiles.)
(Katie walks behind him.)
Katie: Oh are you imaging me naked again.
Ross: Yeah I'm Elizabeth. (Shakes his head.) I mean Katie.
Paul: Just do not screw up my wedding for me.
(Katie and Elizabeth are sitting in the hall. Paul is standing up front with the Minster. )
Katie: Are we the only two people sitting in the hall?
Elizabeth: I know. I mean I'm the only member of the Groom's family here at the wedding.
(Jenny walks down the aisle throwing flowers anyway including in her hair. Ross and the Green sisters walking down the aisle follow this. Jill is holding arms with Amy.)
Jill: Why can't I hold arms with Ross?
Ross: Because you still think I'm gay.
Jill: You turn me down for sex. I mean look at me.
Rachel: Would you two shut up?
Amy: Is it me or is this wedding really uncomfortable.
Ross: Yeah it is.
(Here comes the bride plays as Joey walks his Mother-In-Law down the aisle. Once he gets up front he walks over and stands by Ross.)
Joey: Man is this wedding really uncomfortable.
Ross: Yeah but they look so happy, so I guess that want counts.
(Later anyone is eating at a fancy restaurant.)
Rachel: (Stands up.) I will like to make a speech.
Jill: I cannot believe Rachel was picked to give the speech.
Amy: I can't believe you suggested that Joey choose who does it.
Ross: Do not be so hard on Jill. I mean how do she know he would pick his wife.
Rachel: Would anyone shut up so I can give the speech already? (Anyone looks scared.) I have to admit at when I first found out that Mom was getting married I was not thrilled. After all any wishes that they parents would be together.
Jill: Oh will you hurry up already?
Rachel: But after seeing her happy she is and given that she gave birth to things that all not possible human I guess it is ok that she married an ex- boyfriend of mines who is eleven years younger than her. (Her mom puts up seven figures.) And I guess seven months.
Joey: Great job honey. (He claps while anyone else stares.)
Amy: (Stands up.) You want a speech. I give you a speech.
(Ten minutes have passed. Anyone but Rachel is crying.)
Amy: Thank you.
Ross: That was the greatest speech ever.
(Everyone hugs Amy including Rachel.)
Rachel: I guess it was ok.
Elizabeth: Well I guess it would be pointless for me to give my speech after that.
Paul: Yeah honey.
Mom: Well I guess we better get going. Rachel we like to thank Joey and you for the limo and hotel suit for tonight.
Paul: And the honeymoon in Japan. Weird place for a honeymoon but we have never been there.
Joey: Japan was all Jill's idea.
(Later Rachel and Joey are watching TV.)
Rachel: Japan for a honeymoon. What was Jill thinking?
Joey: I do not know. I mean I brought them tickets for Hawaii but they went missing. So when I went back today to get new tickets it with all they had was Japan or Mexico City.
Rachel: How did you use plane tickets?
Joey: I do not know. I gave them to Amy.
(Amy and some dude are sitting a beach in Hawaii.)
Guy: Man Suzy this was great of you to take me to Hawaii. I have never been. It is so cool to meet another New Yorker in L.A like this.
Amy: But you will call me when we get back right Kevin?
Kevin: Of course I will. (His cell phone rings.) Hello? Can you hold on a second? Hey Suzy can you go give us a couple of sodas. This is a business call.
Amy: Ok.
(Amy walks away.)
Kevin: Oh hi sweetie. It is a topically business meeting. Well they reason why the hotel does not have a Jack Silver at the hotel is they like us to use fake names. What is my fake name? (Pulls the phone away from him.) Honey I can't hear you, just call me on my cell if you need anything.
The End ~213 TOW Ben's Broken Arm~ Coming Soon