Last Christmas

By: Atsureki

Disclaimers : I'm just borrowing them um unless someone wants to take pity on me and give me the boys as a x-mas gift? No? *sighs* Didn't think so…

Warnings : OCC, shonen-ai, angst, christmas-stuff, possible overusing of the word ogle O.o

Notes : Stuff written in Italic are thoughts.

Pairings : Yoji/Aya, Aya/Ken, Ken/Aya

2. Once Bitten, Twice Shy?

There was definitely something between Aya and Yoji the brunette sadly realized the day before his birthday. He wasn't sure what it was but he didn't like it one bit. Yoji was eyeing the redhead more and more often and the look in his green eyes was disturbing to say the least.

Ken sighed deeply and lowered his face so that he would be spared the sight of seeing his lover being ogled. Two days left until christmas eve and it didn't look good for him.

Yoji wasn't the only one looking, Aya was doing it too only he took more care in hiding the reason why. So far Ken hadn't been able to catch a clue to what the look in those amethyst eyes was but he feared it.

"Ken-kun?" He looked up and forced a smile on his face.

"Hai Omi?"

"You okay? You've been staring at Yoji for the last 20 minutes," his youngest friend mumbled and glanced over to the other blonde who was again ogling Aya's back or rather his butt.

"I just… It's nothing, I'm fine." Omi frowned a little and shook his head.

"I wouldn't worry about 'that' if I was you Ken-kun."

"Worry about what?"

"Yotan and Aya-kun. You know what they say… Once bitten, twice shy. Aya-kun's not going to fall into that trap again. He loves you Ken-kun," Omi said softly and patted his friend on the shoulder.

"Does he?" The bitter question slipped out before Ken could stop himself. Blue eyes narrowed and glared slightly at him.

"You doubt the way he feels about you?" The brunette let out a dry chuckle and gestured towards his lover and the blonde who were staring at each other.

"You tell me that I have no reason what so ever to fear that he won't go back to Yoji and I'll stop doubting! Look at them! There's obviously something between them Omi," Ken hissed and walked away. He had to get out of there fast before he started crying.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It was almost midnight when Ken left his room to search for his missing lover. Aya's room was empty so he headed downstairs. He silently walked into the kitchen where he froze. I should have stayed in bed, he sighed. Yoji had Aya pressed up against the counter, effectivly trapping the slightly shorter man with his body and with one arm on each side of the redhead.

"Aya, why are you fighting this?" the playboy almost purred with his face barely an inch away from Aya's.

"Let me go Kudou!" the redhead hissed but there was no force in his voice, actually his words were trembling. Ken swallowed and desperately wanted to leave but his body was numb.

"I would if I believe you really wanted me to let you go… You're shivering Aya," Yoji mumbled with a silky tone in his voice. "You act like you hate my guts but I know better baby. I've seen the way you look at me in the shop. I know you haven't forgotten last christmas just as I haven't… Stop fighting it Ayan, we're so good together."

"No, I…"

"Look me in the eye and tell me you didn't enjoy it, that it didn't feel good." Aya didn't answer but the brunette saw how his lover's body trembled. "You did like it, didn't you?" the lanky blonde asked softly and pressed the issue by slowly licking the pale skin on the redhead's exposed neck. His reward was a soft moan and the answer Ken prayed he wouldn't hear.

"Yesss." If anyone would have been paying attention to the brunette and listened carefully they would probably have heard Ken's heart break. Even in the dark he could see the triumphant smirk on Yoji's face.

"Well then, stop fighting koi… I want you, you want me. You know I can give you something that Ken can't." The tall blonde leaned forward and captured Aya's lips. Ken let out a choked sob, spun around and fled.

He had lost Aya. Sure he had sworn that he would fight for the redhead but what was the point? It was painfully obvious that Aya wanted Yoji so who was he to stand in the way. With tears streaming down his cheek the brunette dove into his room and locked the door behind him. He slid down against the wall and hid his face in his hands.

"He's just fooling you again Aya, can't you see?" Ken sobbed.

Why had he lost? A grim thought came to him. He had lost because he wasn't good in bed, was that it? Okay so he didn't have the experience that Yoji had but then who the hell did? The lanky blonde probably had more partners in a week than half the population of Tokyo had in their entire lifetimes put together.

Ken shook his head and blinked away a few tears. No Aya wasn't that shallow, but he obviously still had feelings for Yoji and that was something Ken couldn't compete with. Love takes two and if Aya didn't want their love than he would simply have to step away, no matter how much it pained him.

The brunette pushed himself away from the wall and crawled across the floor to his bed. A sound made him turn around just as he started to drag himself up on the bed. Someone was trying to open the door? When it was found locked he heard a knock.

"Ken?" Aya's hushed slightly shaky voice reached Ken but he didn't answer or move. "Ken?" It was a little louder the second time but the brunette still didn't attempt to answer, at least not out loud.

I'm not going to let you in Aya. I don't want you in here telling me that it's over and then watch you go to Yoji. He crawled onto the bed and pressed a pillow over his head to block out Aya's voice and his quiet knocking on the door.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

He felt so lost as he stood outside and watched the snow fall. Winter might be beautiful but he seriously hated christmas. It had brought him nothing but pain. Solemly he stared at the lights that cheerfully lit up the dark night. Christmas trees decorated with more lights, Santas with broad smiles on their plastic faces.

How he hated it all. Merry Christmas? Not to him. His heart was aching and his mind was confused. He felt so many things but it wasn't those things that confused him. He knew what he wanted, what he needed but… but what?

He should get back to bed but he didn't want to lie there all alone in the dark. It was so cold there without Him. A single tear slowly made it down his cheek. He was so weak and all he wanted was those strong familier arms wrapped around him, the smell of his lover in his nose and the soft beating of another's heart in his ear. But he wouldn't have that now, would he?

Sad eyes glanced back to the house he had left earlier, or rather escaped from. Home is where the heart is, he sighed inside. But where was his heart now? His heart had been rejected, hadn't it? Another tear fell.

The snow started falling more intensly but he didn't notice. It was cold outside but not nearly as cold as he was inside. Slowly he turned around and walked back into the house and upstairs. He stopped infront of the door that hid his lover from his eyes. His lover? The man who he was losing, who didn't wanted him anymore.

"I love you," he mumbled and headed for his own room.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Ken avoided Aya the best he could the following morning but it wasn't easy. The redhead was everywhere and he could see that the taller man wanted to talk to him. But Ken didn't want to hear it, didn't want to face reality just yet. It was snowing again and Tokyo was now covered in a thick, cold layer of white.

He sighed deeply and turned to another girl who didn't really wanted to buy anything but would simply because of the four men who sold the flowers. In the corner of his eye he saw Yoji smiling at Aya and quickly concentrated on the girl infront of him instead.

The blonde and the redhead were standing way too close for him to like it. Yoji whispered something in Aya's ear and the red haired assassin blushed before he stomped into the backroom.

"Look Ken-kun we're under the mistletoe!" The high-pitched voice made him jump and glance up. So they were. He groaned and quickly pecked the girl's cheek before he hurried back behind the desk where he was safe or at least safer.

"Ladies you have to excuse Kenken here he's a little shy," Yoji drawled and lit a smoke. "I however am not shy at all." The brunette narrowed his eyes in anger. Trust Yoji to whore himself out in the middle of a shop. Couldn't he be satisfied with having Aya? Ken huffed and left without looking back.

"Fuck this!"

~TBC~

Oh dear what's Aya doing? Yoji needs to back off he's ruining everything!!!!!

Jin, you wanted to know what Yoji thinks about all this ne? You will *promises* You'll find out in the next chapter which I'm pretty sure will be the last one.

You still haven't really had Aya's POV of this and you'll get that in the next chappy too. I think this is close to being wrapped up. And also, next time it'll be x-mas!!! *hums x-mas songs loudly* Ja/Atsureki