A note from the author…

This chapter has an R rating. I couldn't figure out how to change the rating of my story, so I'll warn you now. Reader discretion is advised.

"Well, I can tell that Little Ron has come to visit us," Hermione said teasingly. "What does Big Ron have to say about this, hmm?"

"A... s-sexy surprise?" asked Ron, his face a deep crimson. "On the.. Quidditch field?"

"Oh yes, Ron. Now, let me untie this real quick.." she said in a rather sensual voice, removing the tie from his neck as she kissed him. She then put it over his eyes, tied it tightly, and made sure he couldn't see.

"Is this really necessary, Hermione?"

"Of course. It wouldn't be a surprise if you could see, now would it?"

Hermione took a hold of his hand and led him down to the Quidditch field. Ron was trying to think what the surprise could possibly be. He was on the Gryffindor Quidditch team for the first time this year, but he couldn't imagine what she could hide from all the professors and Dumbledore in the Quidditch field; and the locker rooms were locked up during the day. But nothing at all came to his mind. Well, nothing realistic that is. Ron couldn't help but think of a few surprises he'd like to happen, as long as it was one hundred percent safe of someone catching them... Ron smiled at this. Just as another rather fantasy entered Ron's mind, he tripped on a rock and heard Hermione say, "Alohomora." They were going into the locker rooms after all.

"Now Ron, sit on this bench while I get the surprise ready. And no peaking!" she hollered as she left Ron there on the benches next to the sinks. Ron was envisioning yet another possibility, now that it was narrowed down to a location, as Hermione came back in front of him.

"Okay Mr. Weasley," she whispered. "You can take that silly tie off and open your eyes."

Hermione Granger, top sixth year student, was standing in front of him wearing his Quidditch robe, shin and wrist guards. But as if this weren't good enough for Ron, she suddenly went over to the counter, where he saw one of those muggle music boxes like the one his dad had, said a spell, and turned it on.

"Silly Professor McGonagall," she said, as a weird, yet mood-setting song (Let's Get It On for those Muggle readers out there) came through the speakers. "She was the one who told me the spell to let these silly Muggle electronics work temporarily here inside Hogwarts grounds."

Ron gulped as Hermione then shimmied off his robe, revealing a sexy, black lacy bra and panties set. As if it were possible, what Ron saw was even better than what he was imagining (most likely because it was happening right in front of him, rather than in his mind). Once again, he felt his trousers become a little tighter. Man, he thought, I need to get in more control of this, and felt his face get flustered, thinking it was probably completely red.

"Well Ron, I can see that you're liking this surprise. Have anything to say to back up your actions?" Ron could only think of one thing to say.

"Bloody Hell…"

Hermione laughed at this. "I'll take that as a compliment!" she said as she floated over to him and straddled his lap, putting her feet on the floor behind Ron. The two kissed passionately, and as time went on, Ron pinched himself every once in a while to make sure he wasn't dreaming.

This time, as Hermione undressed Ron, he didn't have any objections. I'm not going to get cold feet this time, he decided. Look at her! It would only be fair to get nearly naked myself. When she was finished, Ron was sitting in his boxers.

"Ouch!" he said suddenly. "Herm.. mi" he was trying to talk with Hermione still kissing him. "Herm-ion- OUCH!! Herm.. STOPFORAMINUTE!!"

"What is it, Ron?" she asked, sounding slightly hurt. "Am I doing something wrong?"

"Oh no, Hermione, you're great! Honestly. I mean I've had dreams about this, but bloody hell, you're amazing. It's just that my shin and wrist guards you're wearing, well, they keep scratching me. Do you think you could take them off?"

"OH!! Yes of course!! I'm so sorry!" She quickly took them off and went straight back to kissing him all over his body. Ahhh, Ron thought. Much better!

Meanwhile, back up in Potions, Harry sat miserably next to Seamus as Snape droned on about how to make a potion that makes people say the last place they were, and what they were doing there, occasionally taking down a few notes.

"Hey Harry," Seamus whispered, sounding just as bored as Harry felt. "Where are Hermione and Ron? I saw them at lunch, but they're not here right now."

"Er..." Harry didn't know how to explain that they're most likely snogging somewhere without giving it away. "I don't know Seamus. That's a good question." Harry looked down at his parchment and took down some more notes.

"If you ask me, I'd say those two fancied each other," said Seamus. "And those two students in the prefects' bathroom the other night? Ron and Hermione. They both left and entered the common room with each other that night. It wouldn't surprise me if it were them. Wouldn't doubt it if they've fancied each other since first year!"

"Maybe..." Harry mumbled.

Potions had finally finished, and Harry started to Charms. But when he got there, Ron and Hermione were nowhere in sight. He decided that, although unsure if he really wanted to, he would search for them. It wasn't like Hermione to skip class, much less two in a row.

"Professor Flitwick?" he said.

"Yes, Mr. Potter?"

"I've been feeling a little ill for the past half hour. I thought I'd see if I felt better by the end of my last lesson, but I still feel ill. May I go up to the hospital wing to see Madame Pomfrey?" Harry was impressed by how believable that was.

"Yes, Mr. Potter, but hurry back. Today's lesson is very important if you want your homework assignment to be easy."

Harry started to ponder where the two might be as he entered the corridor. Most likely they had wanted privacy, and Harry had noticed his invisibility cloak was missing this morning; he guessed that Hermione took it for her little plan, so he decided that they probably went outside. He made his way to one of the only private places on the grounds at this time of the day. The Gryffindor Quidditch locker room.

Back in the locker room, Ron and Hermione were now both completely naked, and on the floor in front of the lockers. Ron was loving every moment of this! He finally got up the courage to ask the question he'd wanted to ask for three years now.

"Hermione - would you.. um I mean do you want to,.. er.. can we--"

"Have sex?" Hermione finished for him.

"I was going to say shag, but that works as well I suppose."

"Ronald Weasley! I can't believe you even asked!!" Ron was confused. "That was the most ridiculous question I've heard all day. " She got up, and as Ron watched her, looking as if he were about to cry, she walked back over to where her clothes were, and picked up her skirt. But rather than slipping it back on as Ron expected she was doing, she pulled something out of her pocket.

When she came back over by Ron, he asked, "Hermione, what is that thing?" Hermione looked at him, then back down at the small, square package she was holding.

"Honestly, Ron, are you a sixteen-year-old guy or not? It's a condom!"

"Oh, right. One of those.. " He trailed off, and Hermione could tell he was still confused. Then she rolled her eyes at her own stupidity.

"It's a muggle contraceptive, Ron," she explained to him. "I sometimes take common muggle things like this for granted when I'm here.

Ron nodded and grinned back at her. "Shall we then?"

Harry was making his way down to the Quidditch field, wishing and hoping he wouldn't be seeing anything obscene while down in the locker room. He got down to the door, and noticed it was unlocked already. Taking his chances, he slowly pushed it open. He walked in a few steps, but stopped when he heard something... it sounded a little bit like Ron.

"Herm-mi-on-EEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!" Ron shouted, expressing so many emotions and feelings at once.

Harry was completely speechless as he came to the clearing in front of the lockers.

He couldn't believe what he was seeing.

"Oh Ron!! YESS!! Oh.. Oh Ron! RON RON!!!... HARRY!!!"

"HARRY?!" Ron yelled back, feeling the greatest amount of anger.

"Harry," said Harry, wearily, just before he fell over on the floor, puked, and passed out.