A/N Well, I'm pleased with how much you like this story! Yay! Finally, this chapter is out. I should've posted it sooner but, as these things go, I didn't. Anyway, it's out. Oh, and just to warn you, this chapter is definitely PG-13, possibly verging on R… although maybe not, cos, after all, what would I, a mere 15-year old, know about such matters? :D Anyway, that's about all. R/R!
~Stef
Afterwards, Lily thought it went pretty well. Neither Sirius nor Rebecca looked at all shocked. They would have undergone more magic theory than anyone else, so they had obviously jumped to the same conclusion that James had. As for Amanda and Michael, the gripped hands tightly, Amanda biting her lip. Henry looked shocked and uncertain. Christine reacted differently. She fell off the tree she was sitting on.
There was a mad rush as everyone ran to Christine, but Henry got there first. He was sitting on the second split of the tree-trunk… it was a tree that had somehow divided into three lateral trunks early in its life. Christine's eyes were closed, and she was breathing lightly, almost as if she were asleep. Amanda came up, and Lily realised that instead of rushing to Christine like everyone else, she had gone to the water and filled up a cupful. She splashed the water on Christine's face, and soon the girl began to stir, and then come around.
"What hap- oh." Christine looked around at the group of worried faces, and at Henry holding her hand. He let go quickly, and she smiled (almost shyly, for Christine) at him before saying, "I'm really sorry. I should have told you. Could you give me a hand up?" This last part was directed at Henry, who was still crouching beside her, and Lily fought back a smile. If Christine was well enough to flirt with Henry then she was fine. She'd had her eye on him for a while, Lily knew, and so now she wasn't as worried about Christine as she had been only a moment before.
Henry did help Christine to her feet, and the group all moved closer to the fire, where they could see her more clearly as she spoke. Once they were settled, Christine began, with a sort of embarrassed glance around the group.
"Um… well, I have a… a condition, I guess. Nobody really knows what it is, but Professor Dumbledore thinks it's some kind of curse or gift. Basically, it's a spell that I've had since I was born. Whenever something really important happens, something really hugely important to the wizarding world, I faint. It's a sort of indication to anyone who pays attention, and it's been helpful to Professor Dumbledore in the past."
"Something important as in our escaping this island?" Michael asked.
"N…no, not as such. It may be that some of us will go on to do something important if we… use your idea to get off the island. Maybe one of our children will go on to do something important. Or perhaps it will be something that goes on to happen this week. My 'gift' isn't always regular, but it always happens either when something important happens, or within a week of when the important thing happens. Do you get it?"
"Not really," Lily said, "but I'm sure we'll find out."
"Yeah, I guess. Um… about your idea? I need time to think about it."
"Me too," said Rebecca. Amanda remained thoughtfully silent.
"Maybe we should talk about it more tomorrow," Lily suggested. By 'we' she meant the women, and they all knew it. It was agreed upon, and the meeting split up.
~*~*~
Later, Lily was lying on the sofa, James fiddling with her hair. Suddenly, he said, "I don't like it." Lily didn't have to ask what he was referring to. "The ministry won't send anybody out here after us. We were supposed to report back today, and we didn't. They'll think that we died, and write off this island as too dangerous. This is the only way, I know it. And yet…"
"I know what you mean," Lily said, sighing deeply.
"Do you?" he asked. "All of you women will have to have two children each, and pray to God they're not squibs. Not only is it completely not fair to you, it's not fair to them! I…" James turned slightly red. He continued, more softly.
"I wanted to have a relationship with you once this job was done. I wanted to show you that I cared. But now!" his voice was bitter. "Rebecca's head over heels for Sirius. Amanda and Michael are obviously going to be together, and Henry is so infatuated with Christine that the poor guy can barely speak when she's around. That makes you stuck with me. And I don't want…" he stopped, trying to get the words out. "I don't want you to think I don't care about you, or I'm taking you because you're the only one left." He put his fingers over Lily's lips when she tried to speak, determined to finish.
"No, listen. I don't want you doubting that I love you. And… if we do have children, I don't want them to think they were born as a convenience, just so we could get off this gods-cursed island!"
Lily didn't know how to reply. She just hugged him, and wished they were back at Hogwarts, where things were so much simpler. Before either of the knew it, they were both asleep.
~*~*~
When Lily was jolted awake, she found herself lying in James's arms. He smiled at her, and said, "I woke up slightly before you. I didn't want to move in case you woke."
Lily smiled at him. "Thankyou. Maybe we should get up now?"
"Breakfast. Yes. How do you feel about bacon and eggs?"
That day, the women got together to talk over what had been said the previous evening. Surprisingly, Rebecca spoke first when they were all together.
"I've had a while to get used to the idea. I knew before you said last night. Sirius and I did that course that you did, but in even more depth. I figured it out, and we were wondering when somebody would bring it up. I'm not sure how I'll cope with it, but if you guys do decide that it's the best thing, I'll go along. I know it's the only thing to do."
Lily smiled at Rebecca appreciatively. It was the longest speech she had ever heard the Auror give, and she couldn't help wondering whether Rebecca had practised it. She wasn't one for speaking out loud, usually, but this proved that she would when she had something important to say.
"I've also had longer than you lot to think about it," Lily said. "I've known since the first night here. I don't want to pressure you into anything," and here she looked at Christine and Amanda, "but… I can do it if necessary. I've talked with James quite a bit," here Lily blushed, and Christine grinned evilly. Lily continued doggedly, "and we'll get through it."
Amanda seemed to feel it was her turn to speak. "I also have something I probably should have told you all a week ago. I'm actually already pregnant. I found out the day before we came, but I didn't tell anyone, because Michael would be worried. He knows now, though, so I can tell you. They're twin girls."
After all the congratulations, which went on for twenty minutes and left everyone much more comfortable in each others' presence than before, Christine said, "Okay, I'm being blunt here. I'm not trying to be rude or anything, but… well, I guess you're with James, right, Lily?" At Lily's nod and blush, Christine refrained from teasing her friend just then. "And Amanda's obviously with Michael. Um, Rebecca, there's Henry and Sirius left."
"I know," Rebecca said softly. "And I've talked to… to one of them. Last night. He said… he was a lot more understanding than I would have thought. And he said that… I guess I'll have to tell you. I talked to Sirius. He was flirting with me before we came here, if you didn't know. I ignored him, because I was in the year ahead of him in Hogwarts, and I know what he's like. But he's a really nice guy, and he was… Christine, I'm really sorry. If you want Sirius, I-" Rebecca broke off. During her little speech, she had been looking at the ground, but now she let her hair fall across her face, veiling it from view.
Christine actually grinned with relief. "Chill, Rebecca. I thought you thought that Sirius was a pain and wanted Henry. I can't believe this was so easy! We're settled, then, for partners at least." Rebecca was looking at Christine searchingly, her eyes slightly watery.
"Are you sure?" she asked quietly.
"I'm sure. Ask Lily, she knows."
Lily grinned. "Christine has talked non-stop of Henry for the last four days. I think we're all on safe ground, in that respect, anyway. Now… do you want to do this?"
Amanda was the first to speak. "I can't say anything, because I'm already set, and I wasn't rushed into this. Whatever happens, I'll try to help you."
"I can do it," Christine said. "I've always wanted kids! I never thought I'd be having them so early, but Henry's a nice guy."
"I'll do it. Sirius… last night, he said he would back off with his 'charming me into falling desperately in love with him.' Those were his words, of course, but he did mean it. He's a good guy, and I know he'll help support any children even if the relationship doesn't work out."
"I'm in for it. While we're playing confessional, I didn't want kids until I was all settled, had a husband, and a huge house somewhere, but I think I can live with myself after this." Lily smiled, and saw that her last sentences had served to lighted the atmosphere somewhat. "So, I vote we tell our respective guys on our own. How much should I tell James, as the leader of the expedition?"
"Co-leader," Christine reminded her.
"Tell him everything," Rebecca said, "He should know."
"Yes," Amanda and Christine chorused. Amanda grinned for the first time Lily had seen her, and it took years off her face. For the first time, she seemed as young as them, and Lily realised with a start that she was only ten or so years older than Lily herself. Some girls she knew had sisters older than that! Not many, admittedly, but it was still something.
"Good," Lily said. "What's it that old what's-his-face at the ministry always says? Meeting adjourned!"
~*~*~
In the evening, Lily was sitting on the sofa. She had just finished recounting the events of the evening to James, and he was regarding her thoughtfully. At last, he said, "You're fine with this, aren't you, Lily?"
"Honestly? I don't know. It's… it doesn't seem real. I will be able to do it, though."
"You do know you don't have to…" James began.
"Yes, I do have to. That was decided today. We made a group decision, and I'm going to stick by it. It might take me a week, though, until I'm ready…."
"Don't worry. Nobody's going to push you," James said, almost tenderly.
Lily smiled at him appreciatively, and wondered if the strange sensation she was feeling could be love. "On a lighter note, have you thought of any baby names?"
~*~*~
A week went by, and then two. Christine told Lily that she and Henry had already tried for a child. Rebecca hadn't said anything to Lily about her relationship, but Sirius told James that they were waiting until Rebecca felt more comfortable. It felt good to know that she, Lily, wasn't the only one having difficulty emotionally over this.
Meanwhile, the group had decided to set up a permanent camp near the river on the plains. They wouldn't have to worry about good because each tent was supplied with a fridge, magicked to contain a limitless amount of food. Drinking water would likewise be okay, but everyone felt better near the river, where they could swim and wash clothes.
The group of eight decided unanimously to name the island Azkaban. Sirius came up with the name, after the ancient prison of legends, and it stuck.
By the end of the third week, five weeks after they had arrived on the island, Lily decided that she had waited long enough. In the evening, sitting next to James on the couch, Lily took the initiative.
"James?" she asked hesitantly. He turned to look at her, his brown eyes intense as his full attention was focused on her.
"Yes?" Was it just her, or did James seem to have an idea of what she would be asking?
"I… I think I'm ready now for," why, oh why were the words so hard to say? "for-"
James saved her from having to spell anything out. He kissed her. It was a moment before he withdrew, and asked, "You're sure about this?"
Lily smiled ruefully. "No. I'm not ever going to be. But I'll make do."
"Tonight?" He asked it calmly, but his cheeks were slightly flushed.
"Tonight is… good," Lily replied, blushing herself. Of all the times to get self-conscious, why did it have to be now?
James kissed her again, and she responded. She wasn't fooled. He was trying to make her feel more comfortable, leading her into it slowly, and Lily appreciated it nonetheless. Surprisingly, it actually worked, too. Before she knew it, her buttons were half undone. And then she suddenly had an idea. And obvious one. An idea that refused to go away, and shocked her with its simplicity.
Gently, she disentangled herself from James. To him, she said, "Please- I have a favour to ask. Can we postpone this for a week? To next Saturday night?"
"Of course. That's fine."
"It's not… not because I don't want to. I just have to find out something."
"Don't worry, I'm serious. It's fine." James's voice was reassuring and warm. Then he changed tack grinning cheekily. "Come on, then, off to bed. If you ask nicely, I might even tuck you in!"
Lily grinned and replied, saying, "Is that something I want?"
"It's something I want!"
Lily laughed, and retired to her bedroom. She made him go back to his own, telling him he wouldn't get to see her undress, tonight. He left with a bow and a grin.
Lily waited until the sound of James's regular breathing told her he was asleep in his bedroom on the other side of the thin wall. Then, she grabbed a cloak and her wand, and sneaked out into the night. She fastened her cloak securely, her heart beating excitedly as she contemplated her next move. If only her plan could work!
Lily reached the ocean, and kept on walking. The water reached her knees, then her stomach, then it was up to her shoulders and her neck. She started treading water, and then, taking a second to pray to any gods that might exist, she Apparated.