Okay guys, this is your lot. I've become distracted with another fic I'm
writing so if you want more of me you'll just have to read that one. It's
called 'A Father's Love', and guess what? It's Harry Potter, too.
Of course, if you want more of this, you'll just have to wait a while, and I'll see how the Muse takes me.
Right. The song belongs to none other than Melanie Chisolm, and I really don't think I need to mention who the characters belong to, do I?
Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll continue . . .
*~*~*
Why
Why does the rain fall from the sky?
How can a sugar pill take this pain away?
I should have known that you would break my heart
You've ended something that didn't have a chance to start
Goodness me, it's cold today. I'd hate to be up there in the snow. Harry and Ron wave at me as they fly past. I laugh delightedly. They are so proud to represent Gryffindor.
I glance across at the professor's stand. He's staring again. Somehow, just the knowledge that he watches me warms my cold body to the bone. Determined to ignore him for at least one day, I turn back to my friends, laughing with them at the antics the Weasley twins are pulling on the pitch.
Put out the stars
Rub out the sky
Look to the future
I snuggle further into my scarf, trying to fight back against the biting cold. My nose is frozen, I'm certain it's turning blue. It's no good, I have to see what he's doing now. Oh, my God, he's scowling at Dumbledore. What on earth is going on?
Wipe the teardrop from my eye
Shut out the sun
Put out the light
Want you to tell me how you're gonna make it right
Now he's scowling at me. What have I done now? He notices my frown, and that scowl gets deeper. Unable to prevent myself I grin, biting down the laugh that rises in my throat. Now that really would offend him.
I wish he would smile at me. Even just for a second, just a simple gesture to show me he is a human being. I know he feels something more than hate for me, I've seen it in his face. When he looks at me, I feel a shiver run down my back, and realise I am falling for my stern Potions Master. Shaking my head, I turn away, not wanting to see his scowl any longer. I don't want him to see how it hurts when he frowns at me.
Why am I crying over you?
Why?
'Cos there's nothing else that I can do
Why do I always look a fool?
Why?
A blush runs over my face as I remember the dream I had last night. He came to my bedside while I was having a nightmare, and woke me gently, his dark eyes holding such love for me, I felt safe in his arms. Then he bent and kissed me, and somehow the kiss became more, we were intertwined with each other, the touch of his naked skin sending shivers down my spine. I've never had such a vivid dream before. But when I woke, instead of feeling embarrassed, I was so totally at peace with myself, Lavender had to shake me before I would climb out of bed and dress.
Wish I'd read the signs and left you well alone
God, I wanna call you but I can't pick up the phone
Harry's found the Snitch! As we leap up to cheer him on, I see, from the corner of my eye, someone knock Neville from his perch on the bench. I hear a scream tear itself from my throat as he tumbles over the edge of the stand.
Dean and Seamus grab his ankles, but they can't pull him up. I can see that Seamus is beginning to lose his grip. In terror I search my robes for my wand, remembering with a sinking heart that I left it on the bed. Suddenly, Neville floats up, over our heads and settles on his feet, white and shaking, but otherwise all right. I scan the crowd, trying to discover who has just saved my friend's life.
Put out the stars
Rub out the sky
Look to the future
It was him. I feel an overwhelming surge of emotion wash over me as I realise he rescued Neville. What does that mean? Do I care for him? I raise my hand in a sort of salute, knowing no other way to thank him. He hesitates, then nods curtly and pretends to be enthralled in the game. I know he hates Quidditch. Everyone does. How can I thank him properly? A slow smile curves my lips.
Wipe the teardrop from my eye
Shut out the sun
Bring on the night
Want you to show me how you're gonna make it right
A huge cheer draws my attention back to the game. Harry's got the Snitch! I leap up and down with my friends, laughing hysterically, and cheering him on. I know I must look ridiculous, a huge grin on my face and my hair flying, but I'm so happy for him. It always means so much when Harry wins.
As we file down the steps, and out onto the frozen grass on our way back to Hogwarts, I see Professor Snape stumbling along, held up between McGonagall and Dumbledore. He looks to be in such pain, I feel tears prick my eyes in sympathy for him. Then I realise. He is holding his left arm. Voldemort has called him again and I know, from what Harry has told me, that each time he is called, the torture increases in intensity. This could be the last time I see him alive. Berating myself for having such maudlin thoughts, I hurry after them, determined to make sure he is all right.
Why am I crying over you?
Why?
I follow them quickly through the hallways, tears rolling down my cheeks. What is wrong with me? It's not as if he even cares that I exist. They stop beside the gargoyle as Dumbledore fumbles to remember the password. I see him glance down the corridor, and he sees me. For a moment, my heart flies. He looks so concerned, I realise what a mess I must look. McGonagall strides over to me, demanding to know what I want.
'Please, Professor,' - his head lifts again, and I see the worry in his eyes - 'will Professor Snape be all right?'
He looks like he's been hit with a brick. His eyes glaze over, and he turns away. McGonagall tells me that he will be fine, and I'm not to worry, but I can't help it. I just know that he needs me, and I can't go to him.
I wish I could tell him how much I care. How much he means to me. Because he does. I love him, and no one can take that away from me. At a loss for anything to do, I smile hesitantly at him. His lips twitch as if he wants to return the smile, but the wall closes over him, and now I'll never know.
'Cos there's nothing else I can do
Why do I always look a fool?
Why?
Oh tell me why
As I walk away, I feel the fingers of despair begin to wrap around my heart. I'll never know how he feels if he doesn't survive tonight. And somehow, a part of me would die with him. Tears roll slowly down my cheeks as I make my lonely way back to the circle of light, and my friends.
Tell me why . . .
Of course, if you want more of this, you'll just have to wait a while, and I'll see how the Muse takes me.
Right. The song belongs to none other than Melanie Chisolm, and I really don't think I need to mention who the characters belong to, do I?
Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll continue . . .
*~*~*
Why
Why does the rain fall from the sky?
How can a sugar pill take this pain away?
I should have known that you would break my heart
You've ended something that didn't have a chance to start
Goodness me, it's cold today. I'd hate to be up there in the snow. Harry and Ron wave at me as they fly past. I laugh delightedly. They are so proud to represent Gryffindor.
I glance across at the professor's stand. He's staring again. Somehow, just the knowledge that he watches me warms my cold body to the bone. Determined to ignore him for at least one day, I turn back to my friends, laughing with them at the antics the Weasley twins are pulling on the pitch.
Put out the stars
Rub out the sky
Look to the future
I snuggle further into my scarf, trying to fight back against the biting cold. My nose is frozen, I'm certain it's turning blue. It's no good, I have to see what he's doing now. Oh, my God, he's scowling at Dumbledore. What on earth is going on?
Wipe the teardrop from my eye
Shut out the sun
Put out the light
Want you to tell me how you're gonna make it right
Now he's scowling at me. What have I done now? He notices my frown, and that scowl gets deeper. Unable to prevent myself I grin, biting down the laugh that rises in my throat. Now that really would offend him.
I wish he would smile at me. Even just for a second, just a simple gesture to show me he is a human being. I know he feels something more than hate for me, I've seen it in his face. When he looks at me, I feel a shiver run down my back, and realise I am falling for my stern Potions Master. Shaking my head, I turn away, not wanting to see his scowl any longer. I don't want him to see how it hurts when he frowns at me.
Why am I crying over you?
Why?
'Cos there's nothing else that I can do
Why do I always look a fool?
Why?
A blush runs over my face as I remember the dream I had last night. He came to my bedside while I was having a nightmare, and woke me gently, his dark eyes holding such love for me, I felt safe in his arms. Then he bent and kissed me, and somehow the kiss became more, we were intertwined with each other, the touch of his naked skin sending shivers down my spine. I've never had such a vivid dream before. But when I woke, instead of feeling embarrassed, I was so totally at peace with myself, Lavender had to shake me before I would climb out of bed and dress.
Wish I'd read the signs and left you well alone
God, I wanna call you but I can't pick up the phone
Harry's found the Snitch! As we leap up to cheer him on, I see, from the corner of my eye, someone knock Neville from his perch on the bench. I hear a scream tear itself from my throat as he tumbles over the edge of the stand.
Dean and Seamus grab his ankles, but they can't pull him up. I can see that Seamus is beginning to lose his grip. In terror I search my robes for my wand, remembering with a sinking heart that I left it on the bed. Suddenly, Neville floats up, over our heads and settles on his feet, white and shaking, but otherwise all right. I scan the crowd, trying to discover who has just saved my friend's life.
Put out the stars
Rub out the sky
Look to the future
It was him. I feel an overwhelming surge of emotion wash over me as I realise he rescued Neville. What does that mean? Do I care for him? I raise my hand in a sort of salute, knowing no other way to thank him. He hesitates, then nods curtly and pretends to be enthralled in the game. I know he hates Quidditch. Everyone does. How can I thank him properly? A slow smile curves my lips.
Wipe the teardrop from my eye
Shut out the sun
Bring on the night
Want you to show me how you're gonna make it right
A huge cheer draws my attention back to the game. Harry's got the Snitch! I leap up and down with my friends, laughing hysterically, and cheering him on. I know I must look ridiculous, a huge grin on my face and my hair flying, but I'm so happy for him. It always means so much when Harry wins.
As we file down the steps, and out onto the frozen grass on our way back to Hogwarts, I see Professor Snape stumbling along, held up between McGonagall and Dumbledore. He looks to be in such pain, I feel tears prick my eyes in sympathy for him. Then I realise. He is holding his left arm. Voldemort has called him again and I know, from what Harry has told me, that each time he is called, the torture increases in intensity. This could be the last time I see him alive. Berating myself for having such maudlin thoughts, I hurry after them, determined to make sure he is all right.
Why am I crying over you?
Why?
I follow them quickly through the hallways, tears rolling down my cheeks. What is wrong with me? It's not as if he even cares that I exist. They stop beside the gargoyle as Dumbledore fumbles to remember the password. I see him glance down the corridor, and he sees me. For a moment, my heart flies. He looks so concerned, I realise what a mess I must look. McGonagall strides over to me, demanding to know what I want.
'Please, Professor,' - his head lifts again, and I see the worry in his eyes - 'will Professor Snape be all right?'
He looks like he's been hit with a brick. His eyes glaze over, and he turns away. McGonagall tells me that he will be fine, and I'm not to worry, but I can't help it. I just know that he needs me, and I can't go to him.
I wish I could tell him how much I care. How much he means to me. Because he does. I love him, and no one can take that away from me. At a loss for anything to do, I smile hesitantly at him. His lips twitch as if he wants to return the smile, but the wall closes over him, and now I'll never know.
'Cos there's nothing else I can do
Why do I always look a fool?
Why?
Oh tell me why
As I walk away, I feel the fingers of despair begin to wrap around my heart. I'll never know how he feels if he doesn't survive tonight. And somehow, a part of me would die with him. Tears roll slowly down my cheeks as I make my lonely way back to the circle of light, and my friends.
Tell me why . . .