She stayed by the window, nothing but the ticking of the clock in the
house.
The house that used to be loud, even if it was the two of them. The house
that used to be filled with laughter until Rory yelled at her father, unti
Rory turned it all around and yelled at her.
"You weren't a mother!" she screamed, tears racing down her face.
And she stayed there frozen as the car screeched away. Stayed there frozen
in the window seat, waiting by the window for the car to creep up
the drive, for Rory to stand at the door, bottom lip quivering.
Saying she was sorry. God, she had to be sorry.
Lorealei sat there, waiting for the engine of the car to stop. For the
sounds of her feet in the dried grass. Anything.
"She's not coming" she muttered to herself. She stood up, yawned, and
curled back up in the window seat. "But she has too"
********************
Where the river cross
crosses
the lake
Where the words
Jump off my
pen and
into your pages
********************
"I just didn't want her to have a mother, like I had. One that judged her,
kept her from doing whatever she wanted. I didn't want to be..." she hugged
her knees to her chest, burying her face into the couch.
Luke cleared his throat.
She looked around her living room." So I was more of a friend, I tried. God, I
tried. I was young, I barely knew how to take care of myself" her hands shook in
front of her.
Luke darted his eyes from her blood-shot eyes.
He didn't mention how when she slept, Rory came in, packed her bags,told Luke
to stay with her mom, and left. She didn't want to say goodbye to her mom. There
was so much there, so much she didn't get, she told him. He looked down at his feet
and just nodded.
So he sat there now, and listened to her cry.
"I kept her alive though. And I loved her. I thought at the end that would have
been enough" Lorealei cried into her hands.
***********************
Do you think
just like that
You can divide
This
You as yours
Me as mine
to before we were
Us
**********************
Dean kept driving, keeping his eyes ahead as she curled up in the
seat next to him. But she was quiet.
For the first time since he'd ever known Rory, she was quiet. She was
silent, almost grieving, looking out the window like she was watching
the world going past. Like she was leaving her life behind.
"Is..everything alright?" he managed to choke out, turning off the
Tori Amos tape.
"I need some coffee" Rory replied.
Dean kept driving, looking down at the cell phone she had thrown on the
dashboard that kept ringing, each time it made a sound, she squeezed her
eyes tight. He kept driving, pulling over at a rest stop only once.
************************
If the rain
Has
to separate from
Itself
does it say
"pick out your
cloud?"
pick out your
cloud
************************
She called him in a hurry.The only really reliable person she could recall
ever knowing. Everytime she needed him, there he was. If only when she
had called, Rory kept mentally kicking herself, her voice hadn't cracked
and she had started to cry.
"Of course, I'll be right over" he whispered."Is everything else alright,
Rory?"
She hung up the phone, and paced the length of her room. Mentally throwing
just the things she needed into her suitcase already.
"I don't understand" Jess had said, sinking down into a chair in
the apartment he shared with Luke, looking at the phone like it was
an alien."No, Rory. I don't understand".
"Just don't tell my mother" she answered quickly, hanging up the phone,
and running from the front door as soon as Dean stopped the car.
****************************
house.
The house that used to be loud, even if it was the two of them. The house
that used to be filled with laughter until Rory yelled at her father, unti
Rory turned it all around and yelled at her.
"You weren't a mother!" she screamed, tears racing down her face.
And she stayed there frozen as the car screeched away. Stayed there frozen
in the window seat, waiting by the window for the car to creep up
the drive, for Rory to stand at the door, bottom lip quivering.
Saying she was sorry. God, she had to be sorry.
Lorealei sat there, waiting for the engine of the car to stop. For the
sounds of her feet in the dried grass. Anything.
"She's not coming" she muttered to herself. She stood up, yawned, and
curled back up in the window seat. "But she has too"
********************
Where the river cross
crosses
the lake
Where the words
Jump off my
pen and
into your pages
********************
"I just didn't want her to have a mother, like I had. One that judged her,
kept her from doing whatever she wanted. I didn't want to be..." she hugged
her knees to her chest, burying her face into the couch.
Luke cleared his throat.
She looked around her living room." So I was more of a friend, I tried. God, I
tried. I was young, I barely knew how to take care of myself" her hands shook in
front of her.
Luke darted his eyes from her blood-shot eyes.
He didn't mention how when she slept, Rory came in, packed her bags,told Luke
to stay with her mom, and left. She didn't want to say goodbye to her mom. There
was so much there, so much she didn't get, she told him. He looked down at his feet
and just nodded.
So he sat there now, and listened to her cry.
"I kept her alive though. And I loved her. I thought at the end that would have
been enough" Lorealei cried into her hands.
***********************
Do you think
just like that
You can divide
This
You as yours
Me as mine
to before we were
Us
**********************
Dean kept driving, keeping his eyes ahead as she curled up in the
seat next to him. But she was quiet.
For the first time since he'd ever known Rory, she was quiet. She was
silent, almost grieving, looking out the window like she was watching
the world going past. Like she was leaving her life behind.
"Is..everything alright?" he managed to choke out, turning off the
Tori Amos tape.
"I need some coffee" Rory replied.
Dean kept driving, looking down at the cell phone she had thrown on the
dashboard that kept ringing, each time it made a sound, she squeezed her
eyes tight. He kept driving, pulling over at a rest stop only once.
************************
If the rain
Has
to separate from
Itself
does it say
"pick out your
cloud?"
pick out your
cloud
************************
She called him in a hurry.The only really reliable person she could recall
ever knowing. Everytime she needed him, there he was. If only when she
had called, Rory kept mentally kicking herself, her voice hadn't cracked
and she had started to cry.
"Of course, I'll be right over" he whispered."Is everything else alright,
Rory?"
She hung up the phone, and paced the length of her room. Mentally throwing
just the things she needed into her suitcase already.
"I don't understand" Jess had said, sinking down into a chair in
the apartment he shared with Luke, looking at the phone like it was
an alien."No, Rory. I don't understand".
"Just don't tell my mother" she answered quickly, hanging up the phone,
and running from the front door as soon as Dean stopped the car.
****************************